apaul

@GTonyJacobs Huh, that explains a lot. It's purely a refusal to respect someone's wishes and not really an issue of the norms of the language...

@GTonyJacobs Huh, I didn't know that? Seems like people would/should be less awkward using it then...

Seems like a lot of languages have that issue... But language evolves, like everything else, given enough time.

@Hamsterrific traditionally there wasn't a "singular they" in English either. Using "they/them" as singular gender neutral pronouns is something that's developed more recently.

@Obie 2.0 People usually call that "dead naming" and it's a crap thing to do to someone. Many of the trans people I've met would be deeply insulted even if their old name was used in reference to them before they transitioned. Many will also be really hurt if someone asks what their old name was.

@Ælis Fixed: chat.stackexchange.com/transcript/message/51771696#51771696

The link seems borked. One sec.

Can anyone here read malayalam?

Kinda missing the point there.

@EmC ...or you could leave community policy more open to the community. Then again, I suppose my perspective on how the model worked was either never correct, or is no longer correct.

@Rainbacon I knew I voted for you for a reason.

@ElizB

@Rainbacon @NVZ

@Ælis @avazula

Current mods, no cheating.

Question for the candidates, what's wrong with this picture? interpersonal.meta.stackexchange.com/questions/3583/…

Or participate in a protest that brings the attention of thousands?

Why argue with an individual when you can create something that influences hundreds?

Largely the same way the human rights movements always have. Protests, boycotts, art, literature, film, etc.

Perhaps to word that better... It's a waste of everyone's time to work one on one convincing bigots not to be bigots, with the very rare exception of people that you're personally connected to. If you want to affect change on a large scale one needs to focus on tipping the scales of justice and public opinion.

Perhaps the big lesson that I learned from my time on SE...

@Alexander I'm not trying to convince folks anymore. I'm pretty happy to tell them to get fucked as individuals and work on a bigger picture.

I did grow up in the American south. And I didn't intend that as some sort of test, you asked a specific question and got a specific answer, and then attempted to stretch that out to make a flimsy point.

I don't think anyone really fully grasps that stuff until it happens to them.

When you pick where do go on dates with the possibility of hate crime in the back of your mind it changes your perspective.

When it affects where you can get a job, or where you're allowed to live...

Sure, you can think that you're woke or progressive, and that all sounds good. But when you're personally affected all of those things carry a different weight.

It's just the difference between theory and experience.

That revelation you were asking about...

Good luck with that.

@Alexander Right, and you're so obviously an expert here...

Which wasn't helpful

@Alexander exactly.

@Alexander Eh, the response was hostile because your comment was tone deaf. Kinda smacked of "I don't have to deal with this, so I'm talking out of my ass, but this is how these things should be handled."

The way you just expect to be heard and respected, like it's a given, says a bit about your experience. You don't expect to be shut down. You were really taken aback that I wasn't interested in what you had to say... very apparently not accustomed to that...

I dismissive because what you said, and how that indicated a lack of personal experience.

And there it is...

Go back and read what you opened with.

@Alexander You also talk like a dude bro.

@Alexander Eh, cause you came across like every other spoiled dude bro who was gonna step in and tell me how it's done. Admittedly most of them come from a more right leaning position, but the entitlement was dripping off your initial comment.

@Alexander I didn't really get why people were as angry as they were. I didn't have the first hand experience of things like micro agression, or understand why anyone would need a safe space.

@Alexander @EmC 's job is to keep the peace, and they know my tendencies well enough to keep an eye on things.

It wasn't until I came out of the closet and had the lived experience of being openly discriminated against that I saw first hand that for all of my political positions and all of my rhetoric, I didn't really "get it"

Mad about being excluded from the conversation, angry about being labeled "priviledged"

Believe it or not, I once was that kind of white dude.

That's your axe to grind...

Ah...

When we allow that reframing, we do society a disservice.

He's a white nationalist. Not a crusader for free speech.

It's equally fucked to allow figures like Richard Spencer reframe the debate.