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1:00 PM
Then all this "not available in my country" nonsense would be a thing of the past
 
What a nonsense suggestion. How would you search it for any type of useful content?
 
Well, computer scientists would find a way, I'm sure
plus, it would be mostly used for sharing pictures of cats, at a guess.
 
Call me paranoid, but I think right after finding a way, said scientists would buy off all videos off the network and make them all unavailable in my country.
 
so would become redundant once everyone had seen a picture of a cat.
 
Of which cat?
 
1:01 PM
The ceiling one.
 
any of them
 
Those, too.
 
@RegDwighт true, but surely capitalism and no sense of nationalistic territory on the network would stop them?
otherwise it would be international any more
 
No amount of Shirley capitalism would stop them. Wake up sheeple.
 
Shirley Capitalism, she's my kinda gal.
She'll do anything for money.
 
1:04 PM
There’s obviously a conspiracy here. You never see pictures of a cute little mousey, only of their evil tormenters. Does anybody else smell a rat?
 
So why is it that people confuse capital and capitol, but nobody ever writes capitolism?
 
Because embolisms are rare compared with cannibalisms.
 
0
A: Conjunction use: "and" or "or" in list of examples

unknownthis shit isn't useful -.- . thanks for nothing!!

 
The entitlement generation.
 
Yay! another happy customer
 
1:07 PM
macbook# oed '^\w+alism$' | wc -l
     398
macbook# oed '^\w+olism$' | wc -l
      38
 
Jinx!
@Matt.
 
do you think they understand sarcasm?
i'm not sure either way
 
what are you talking to me? — unknown 20 secs ago
There's your answer.
 
Apparently, artidicialfuck does not allow hot linking.
-3
A: Conjunction use: "and" or "or" in list of examples

unknownthis shit isn't useful -.- . thanks for nothing!! Suck my dick :p

Nice edit.
 
1:10 PM
thanks :)
oh, his :(
 
Ah, Ben Dover is back.
Little bluebird of happiness that he is.
> PATNA, India - (Reuters) - A village council in the eastern Indian state of Bihar has banned the use of mobile phones by women, saying the phones were "debasing the social atmosphere" by leading to elopements - a move that set off outraged protests from activists.
> In addition to the ban, the Sunderbari village council in a Muslim-dominated area some 385 kilometers (239 miles) east of Patna, the capital of Bihar, has also imposed a fine of 10,000 rupees ($180) if a girl is caught using a mobile phone on the streets. Married women would have to pay 2,000 rupees ($36.60).
Good way to encourage marriage, eh?
You can get a phone discount.
 
but what if the husband needs to contact his wife after he's sent her to get the shopping? Will she have to go back home, only to be sent out again? What if it's his daughter? Such as confusing law.
 
A man of station does not send his daughter out shopping.
He sends the servants.
 
@MattЭллен Well how did we make do for tens of thousands of years?
Either send her out again, or let her get it the next time.
 
@RegDwighт but then technology, so making do is a waste of time.
 
1:22 PM
Just make sure you don't forget to beat her for not doing it right.
 
I wish there was a ban on women using cell phones while driving in this country. I've come close to death many times while trying to ride my bike on the public roads.
 
It's not just women.
 
I wish there were a ban on cars
 
@MattЭллен But use of technology is forbidden by law. Reading comprehension, dude!
 
@RegDwighт d'oh
 
1:23 PM
@kit: True. But it mostly is.
 
@Robusto ur funneh.
Looks like mostly teenagers from where I'm sitting.
 
yeah, all those dogs on phones. it's ridiculous. at least in South London, anyway.
 
I'm just an accurate observer and reporter.
 
Uh-huh.
 
Hey, I've also cone close too grief from men driving aggressively, which is something women seldom do.
*to
Stupid smart phone.
 
1:25 PM
wait — using a phone while in charge of a vehicle is legal in your parts, @Robusto?
 
Yep.
 
I no rite
 
although I think people are still allowed to use hands free kits in the UK
 
That's what I use. My car has Bluetooth connection to phone.
 
1:27 PM
I just talk on the phone.
I don't usually text while driving.
 
not that our law stops people. I still see it regularly
 
But I rarely talk on the phone in the car anyway.
 
Although I do text at stop lights sometimes.
 
I never talk on the phone. Or text. In fact now I wonder why I have one.
 
Or I use the voice recorder.
 
1:28 PM
I do play games on the bus.
 
@RegDwighт so that when people ask if you have one you can say "yes" and they don't look at you like you're from mars
 
U R DA PROBLEM, @kit.
 
@Robusto NO U!
 
The only way to text while driving requires putting the phone at 12 o’clock atop the steering wheel. It also requires that it have a QWERTY keyboard that you don’t have to look at. It also helps for the car to be in park.
 
@MattЭллен I still remember the times when only the two worst pricks in town would have mobile phones.
Not much has changed, arguably. It's just that nowadays everyone's a prick.
 
1:29 PM
lol
 
Tru dat.
 
In fact, in our clique I was one of the first people to get a mobile. After literally years of bitching about how awful they were.
 
100.000%.
 
What's the difference between a BMW and a cactus? The cactus has its pricks on the outside.
 
There must be a very similar joke in German.
 
1:31 PM
I remember when I first heard that joke I didn't understand it.
 
Probably because it was in German.
 
I only have a cell because Mom gave me one because she didn’t like it when I would go on long hikes in the mountains and she wanted to know whether I’d been eaten. Of course, cell phones don’t work in the mountains, so the money was wasted.
 
I don't understand why a person would not have a mobile phone.
 
Serenity.
Freedom from being hassled.
 
You can have a mobile phone and have serenity. Just turn it off when you're not using it.
 
1:33 PM
indeed
 
I think the average figure for Germany are 2+ mobile contracts per person. Not to mention phones.
 
Why in the world do you need 100% connectivity?
 
It's better than having spammers calling every hour of the day on a land line.
 
That's including toddlers and alzheimers and hobos.
 
We are attack to
 
1:34 PM
Yes, phonelessness is rarer than homelessness. Much.
 
Cheaper too. At least cheaper than mine used to be.
 
Yeah. Being a hobo is really expensive these days.
 
We are shackled to the cloud.
 
Haha. I meant mobiles.
 
I miss the times when mongrels without a penny would simply look for tidbits like you on the ground.
 
1:35 PM
I use mine to forestall altercations with my brothers.
 
A mobile is a type of kinetic sculpture constructed to take advantage of the principle of equilibrium. It consists of a number of rods, from which weighted objects or further rods hang. The objects hanging from the rods balance each other, so that the rods remain more or less horizontal. Each rod hangs from only one string, which gives it freedom to rotate about the string. Mobiles are popular in the nursery, where they hang over cribs to give infants something to entertain them and give them external visual stimulation. Mobiles have inspired many composers, including Morton Feldman a...
 
should we be calling them "handys"?
 
I said mobiles, not mobiles.
 
Did you say mobilés?
 
Stupid phone can't handle rapid-fire chat.
 
1:36 PM
@MattЭллен I thought those were walkie-talkies?
 
@Robusto You need to get an AK plugin.
 
@Robusto Well, get to a real computer!
 
Very good question. They are indeed /ˈmoʊbɪlz/.
 
@KitFox I thought it was German slang for mobile phones
 
Not donne mobile.
 
1:37 PM
@MattЭллен not slang. Actual word. All registers.
 
@RegDwighт oh! my mistake. TIL
 
Ick. What an awful word.
 
You invented it.
 
as an adjective!
 
1:38 PM
@MattЭллен you want a list of Russian nouns you misuse as adjectives?
Don't sputnik me, bro.
 
@RegDwighт just the ones that Russians complain about
 
> Mein Handy. Oh, wo ist mein Handy? Ich habe mein Handy verloren!
 
@MattЭллен Russians do not complain about English words. For that they'd have to know that English exists.
 
@RegDwighт Are there? I had no idea.
I didn't know we even used Russian.
 
It's all part of Putin's scheme.
 
1:40 PM
What with the whole war and all.
 
The war on words.
 
@RegDwighт Which one?
 
Oh hey! That reminds me of a funny story about a submarine. Want to hear it?
 
Submariners are always funny.
 
@tchrist the great scheme of things. That one.
 
1:42 PM
@KitFox does it involve a fire drill?
 
@MattЭллен Um, not this one.
 
@KitFox then yes!
 
No, a loo flush.
 
A loo, eh. La-dee-da. Where I'm from it's called the bog.
 
So a US sub was submerged and cruising at a rapid pace when the workstations crashed, displaying a single message across monitors:
"Please contact you local HP representative."
 
1:43 PM
@RegDwighт That would be a bog-standard loo then.
 
oh dear
 
The submarine surfaced immediately, because it had to.
 
And did HP take the call?
 
@tchrist and who are you, the bogeyman?
 
Don’t make me quote the Denham Tracts again.
 
1:44 PM
Wasn't my intention.
 
They got on the satellite phone and called the 800 number and asked for the local representative for somewhere in the North Atlantic about 400 nautical miles from Iceland.
 
Or anybody's.
 
Nor Casablanca.
 
Que viene el Coco.
 
@KitFox lol
 
1:45 PM
@KitFox What, in Danish?
 
No, in Indian English, of course.
 
Turns out the license had expired on something.
 
Those two words do not belong in the same sentence, Kemosabe.
 
Watch me put them there.
 
@KitFox /facepalm
 
1:46 PM
Hi.
 
Wo?
 
Wo denn?
 
I have a flipping 7am telecon with India in 15 minutes. I never understand a word they say.
 
@MattЭллен No shit, right? "You need to make this work right now or we can't get home."
 
1:46 PM
I make them send me minutes by mail.
 
@KitFox No way, seriously??
 
@Cerberus Yep.
 
This smells too much like a true story to be a joke.
 
Insane!
 
Read more about it in Kit's next book. Only $25 for each additional chapter.
 
1:47 PM
It is a true story. That's what makes it funny.
 
Funny and sad.
 
Well, American chopper pilots now use iPads for navigation.
Good luck with that.
 
Hm, bittersweet is not quite the right word for both funny and sad. Is there one?
 
Lies!
 
have they upgraded the maps package?
 
1:48 PM
HAHAHAHA
 
Hahaha this ^.
 
That reminds me of a different sub story.
 
"Upgraded", as if there were anything to upgrade to, until Google Maps comes out.
 
But you probably remember that one.
 
1:49 PM
@Cerberus well, that's what I meant :D
 
@Cerberus read that and shut it.
 
The government actually had to tell companies here that Ipads are taxable, and not "essential communications equipment".
 
And you wonder why they’re still in bankruptcy.
 
@MattЭллен nods
 
That's AA, but actually the first ones to do that were Apache pilots.
 
1:50 PM
What, they quit using smoke signals?
 
Those were too fast. And the battery was replaceable.
 
Carbon footprint.
 
And they tell us not to text while driving...
How come they are allowed to?
 
Something about sketch and capitalism.
 
Sketch?
 
1:51 PM
Nov 14 at 16:28, by Cerberus
@RegDwighт It could be a in a comedy sketch, about capitalism.
Your memory is nonexistent, innit.
 
One wonders what happens when a couple of Ipads crash on the floor during turbulence, or when they forget to charge them.
Oh, ahah.
 
Doesn't matter, as long as Apple doesn't forget to charge them.
 
You think you're like Vergil, and I'm supposed to recognise any vague allusion to your poetry when I see it...
 
Who makes vague allusions to Vergil?
 
I believe recent research has shown that tablets didn't add an iota of increased productivity in a certain corporation.
 
@tchrist If this is some sort of allusion, it is vague enough...
 
Lavinia is a Locus Award winning 2008 novel by American author Ursula K. Le Guin. It relates the life of Lavinia, princess of Laurentum, a minor character in Vergil's epic poem the Aeneid. Outline Lavinia, daughter of the king of the Latins, is sought after by neighbouring kings, but knows she is destined to marry a stranger. This is Aeneas from the Trojan War, who arrives with a large body of Trojans. An agreement is made but then breaks down and there is war, which is won by the outnumbered Trojans. They found a new city, called Lavinium, but Aeneas is killed after three years. Aene...
 
@RegDwighт Ugm. That smacks of corruption.
 
No shit Sherlock.
 
1:55 PM
I believe the Pentagon is already being corrupted by Hollywood and corrupting it in return...and now this.
Excessive capitalism is so bad.
 
shakes head You are so ridiculous.
 
The Ipads thing could happen here too.
It may already have happened.
 
Yes. That's why they beat up referees, to distract from corruption in the military.
 
They may have shown some generals Apple's HQ and sucked up to them a bit...and bam.
 
I guess I don't see it. Where else will they get their equipment? How is that corruption?
 
1:58 PM
@RegDwighт I vaguely read about that, but everyone knows football is beyond...everything.
 
Is it corrupt that Boeing and Lockheed have military contracts?
 
It is, when they use that to boot competition.
 
Or am I not understanding you?
 
Which they do.
 
That's a very superficial view of how the process works.
 
1:59 PM
The whole military complex is about spending money on shit that could be spent on, oh I don't know, healthcare.
 

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