Just for interest, what would be a not racist word for "indian"? What is racist about this word? I'm asking because I know discussions about suddenly no longer using a word because it's racist - but don't dare to ask why it is. People don't like to be told they're doing wrong without knowing why. Or am I wrong and you talk about the way to dress? — puck 1 min ago

Not worth an answer, but have you considered offering to exercise with her? That's something many folks (including myself) neglect when trying to lose weight. It could be as simple as a short walk during lunch or after work, and will help to take focus away from food. — WordsandNumbers 1 min ago

@WordsandNumbers: If something isn't worth an answer, it is even more not supposed to be a comment. I would advice you trying to build an answer around it, as in the comments it very likely won't persist — dhein 2 mins ago

I have known some foreigners who would switch to speaking English around other English speakers hoping that the English speakers would converse with them to give them better practice than they can get on their own. I strongly agree with the suggestion to talk with them and find out from them why they do this to better understand their motive before attempting to suggest they should continue in their own language. — Ed Grimm 2 mins ago

@Rekesoft: or the condom was not put correctly, or was accidently damaged when put on, or out of date condom was used, or the condoms were stored in a bad environment,... many things can happen. My problem is that we should probably assume that the OP is a regular, average user, and not a perfect user. It is like the bad driver fallacy: most people consider that they drive better than the average. Though, to be fair, now that the OP is worried about pregnancy and had got two links about birth control and condoms, he is somewhere between regular user and perfect user. — Taladris 1 min ago

"If she does for some reason decide to respond with a load of anger and forms a temper simply because she can't have sex with you for a few days... I would consider leaving the relationship. If you're worried about having a reasonable proposition and plan of action (to help with your nervousness) end in anger and suffering then that's a good sign that it's not a healthy relationship." I think this section absolutely needs to be backed up. — dhein 1 min ago