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2:00 PM
Give them massive amounts of tequila and have them sleep with the receptionist?
 
TEQUILA
Unsportsmanlike conduct
 
It's one of the few liquors I can have :(
 
Get on that Clase Azul yo
 
I love it when parallel plans get downgraded all the way to MAXDOP 1
but they still look like they're parallel
 
Like taking a jaguar emblem and sticking it on your 1990 Honda civic
 
2:06 PM
Sean, any more advice on 118032217868403?
I just installed 2017 RTM base
 
I didn't check it this AM
 
changed nothing but max server memory
reproduced the issue
I'm out of patience
am I communicating something poorly?
 
Offer a screen share
 
As if
 
He's getting some other people involved and should be contacting you friday
 
2:09 PM
It's possible your E doesn't know what to look at
 
@sp_BlitzErik I thought about sending an animated gif
 
Well, my night just opened up. I vote that Paul should teach us debugging
 
Remove bugs. Done.
 
I can throw in random Microsoft swag
 
@SeanGallardy-Microsoft I got $110 on it
 
2:10 PM
I'll throw in some cash too!
 
Big Money Joe where you at
 
which rate will Paul charge us though?
is it the emergency rate?
 
Hard to say
 
Depends on if it falls under "Interesting" stuff or not
 
It's us so no
 
2:12 PM
or maybe we bribe him with "sandwiches"
or if I could type
 
I think that's how they spell it there
 
you all have a weird idea of a good time
 
Tequila and a debugger? What could go wrong?
 
sounds like we'll get the punitive rate
not good
 
see the drinking part of it is right
 
2:16 PM
Or we didn't please the interesting gods with enough sacrificial pdb's
 
but seriously windbg it's a wonder any of us has ever even spoken to a girl
 
that settles it
I'm not using windbg until I'm married
 
It's like you set these up on purpose...
 
sometimes I do
 
do you know you're doing it, or is it just a natural tendency to leave yourself wide open like that?
 
2:18 PM
I got married so I wouldn't have to talk to girls anymore
2
 
@SeanGallardy-Microsoft I have no insecurities that you can reach, florida-boy
 
I'm pretty sure it was more about the getting the charges dropped
@JoeObbish Not looking to exploit any of your insecurities - I'm not 12, I don't neg
I'm 13, totally all grown up
 
I responded to the ticket
I am providing support for MS support
 
I try to be a helpful guy
 
2:24 PM
He legit said he'd hit you up in 24-48 hours
 
@JoeObbish all you need now is to find a really nice area of open grassland, a premier field, if you will
 
yeah, he also said that he could not reproduce the issue on RTM
I am able to reproduce the issue. there is a problem that needs to be solved
 
he responded and said NOT in capitals
You know, I had a dream I had my mechanical keyboard back
 
right, sorry
it's still a problem
 
email must not have hit casemail yet
 
2:28 PM
anyway, it's fine
it's a character building exercise
 
a case-insensitive character-building exercise
 
@JoeObbish for who?
 
@sp_BlitzErik me
maybe I'll email Joe Sack
 
@sp_BlitzErik sumo deadlift for lower back?
 
he's always so nice and makes me feel appreciated
 
2:30 PM
@JoeObbish If you do, include the case#
 
no, not about that
 
froidian slip
 
I am providing product feedback
 
@SeanGallardy-Microsoft sumo is lame af
Next thing I know you'll be pulling mixed grip with straps
 
2:38 PM
assume I don't have much equipment and I need to hit lower back because it's weak - leave me some good options
 
you'd think bionics would be mainstream by now
the future is quite disappointing
 
Regular deadlifts? 😁
@PaulWhite still waiting for flying cars.
 
There's the odd drone taxi?
But yeah
 
3:31 PM
@sp_BlitzErik It's back day, not whole body day
alright you talked me into it
 
@PaulWhite just finished the series
I thought it was wonderful
also I get what you meant now all of those months ago when you talked about the TOP being unnecessary in the anti join plans
possible typo in part 1: "Perhaps a future update will address this issue (maybe by adding a EstimatedRowsReadWithoutRowGoal attribute!) who knows."
 
4:19 PM
@SeanGallardy-Microsoft do some ham glute raises then chickadee
 
I'm looking at query plan memos
send help?
 
i hear they're all lies
 
fake memos?
the memo items that I want to look at get pruned
how do I fix this?
 
4:39 PM
are you using 8608 and 8615?
 
yes
 
i'm not sure how to get more than that, sorry
 
yeah
I have a query which is eligible for both hash join and loop join
optimizer picks loop join
but the initial memo has no costing information
and the final memo doesn't have the costing info that I want
I want to see the costing for the hash join that got thrown out
Rule Result: group=8 3 <LASJNtoHS>PhyOp_HashJoinx_jtLeftAntiSemiJoin 3 4 7 (Distance = 1)
Rule Result: group=8 2 <RASJNtoHS>PhyOp_HashJoinx_jtRightAntiSemiJoin 4 3 7 (Distance = 2)
hash join rule is applied during optimization
but here's the final memo:
Group 8: Card=39693.2 (Max=110000, Min=0)
4 <LeftSideJNtoIdxLookup>PhyOp_Applyx_jtLeftAntiSemiJoin 3.2 15.1 Cost(RowGoal 1,ReW 0,ReB 0,Dist 0,Total 0)= 0.0148452(Distance = 1)
1 <CommLASJN>LogOp_RightAntiSemiJoin 4 3 7 (Distance = 1)
0 LogOp_LeftAntiSemiJoin 3 4 7 (Distance = 0)
 
--Trace flag 8605 < Initial query tree
--Trace flag 8606 < Additional LogOp trees
--Trace flag 8607 < Optimizer output tree
--Trace flag 8608 < Input tree copied into memo
--Trace flag 8609 < Operation counts
--Trace flag 8612 < Extra LogOp info
--Trace flag 8615 < Final memo
--Trace flag 8619 < Applied transformation rules
--Trace flag 8675 < Optimization phases and timing
you probably know those, but i'm hopping on a call
 
yeah, I'm looking at part 4 of Paul's article
maybe I should just mail my $500 to NZ
 
4:49 PM
send laptops, he likes those
 
5:05 PM
I might just post a question
sigh
posting questions here can be rough
rahul will tell me to enable LPIM
 
5:18 PM
ok, I think I got it for the case without the hint
now to add the hint...
 
5:41 PM
looks like it's just not there
 
what's not there?
 
costing info for the loop join
ok, I got a theory for the fundamental question
to restate
with loop join hint only, optimizer picks loop join with a total cost of 0.0071632 units. with loop and hash join hint, optimizer picks hash join with a total cost of 4.79962 units. why should the optimizer pick the hash join then?
the displayed cost in the XML for the loop join is not what is used to compare plan costs during the optimization phase. none of the numbers add up or make sense. I'd argue that it's bugged
2 <LeftSideJNtoIdxLookup>PhyOp_Applyx_jtLeftAntiSemiJoin 3.4 15.2 Cost(RowGoal 0,ReW 0,ReB 0,Dist 0,Total 0)= 23.8082(Distance = 1)
that's the "real cost"
23.8082 units
 
0.0071632 over how many iterations?
 
@sp_BlitzErik it's 0.0071632 everywhere
it's totally screwed up
will upload
look at those operator costs
0.0071632 + 0.0071632 = 0.0071632
now I fully grasp what Paul was talking about last night
man, what a pain in the ass that was
 
oh, that is weird
way out wiggy weird
the entire plan, hahaha
 
5:52 PM
I didn't pay attention to it before
but the customer plan has the same pattern
it's being picked with the following hint: OPTION( USE HINT ('DISABLE_OPTIMIZER_ROWGOAL'), HASH JOIN, LOOP JOIN )
 
this is so lol
 
you are laughing at my pain
 
can you send me the repro?
 
yeah
hm
config matters
it's a legacy demo
 
6:09 PM
i can change the database config
 
though based on yesterday non-legacy CE repros exist
OPTION (USE HINT ('DISABLE_OPTIMIZER_ROWGOAL', 'FORCE_LEGACY_CARDINALITY_ESTIMATION'), LOOP JOIN, MAXDOP 1);
hit that easy button
 
i have slightly different costs, but yeah
this fun bag still works
SELECT TOP 1 (1)
FROM (
	SELECT TOP (9223372036854775807) 1 AS yourmom
	FROM JRO_OUTER o
	WHERE NOT EXISTS
	(
	    SELECT 1
	    FROM JRO_INNER i
	    WHERE i.ID = o.ID
	)
) AS x
 
I don't go to kotaku
 
just read the link
i'm here for you
 
6:25 PM
I don't even read kotaku links
that's like reading a headline
 
today-katy-perry-ate-too-many-nuggets-on-japanese-tv
 
EstimatedAvailableDegreeOfParallelism="7"
> mfw
 
what a dunce
 
well I think the server has 14 cpus
that one gets divided by 2
but it still makes me uneasy
 
apparently odd dops don't matter eh
 
6:30 PM
it's just a costing adjustment
 
"just"
 
7 is a lucky number
 
to who
 
to databases
 
6:49 PM
Do you even database?
 
@SeanGallardy-Microsoft yes, I'm so good at databasing that I provide support to your support team ;)
 
current status: downloading all sql server versions and service packs
 
@JoeObbish He says being happy that he can repro something but not fix it ;)
@sp_BlitzErik You have my deepest sympathies
So I did some terrible form deadlifts first exercise... and I was kaput
but I powered through all 5 exercises
 
that's a low blow
 
It was above the belt ;)
well, above my belt but I'm shorter than you... sooo..
 
6:54 PM
at least you can deadlift >;(
 
True... but I had a really hard time doing 225lbs. Could barely get 4-5 reps in
 
hook grip
 
considering this AM I weighed in at 157.6 ... that's not good
I threw on straps - then I could do 5
I didn't go goofy, I stayed over hand
When you're done with that monitor - send it to me, I'll even pay for shipping ;)
 
better than that kiwi deadbeat
 
@JoeObbish I see the email you sent now - I lol'd but glad you followed up
@sp_BlitzErik I wonder what Kiwi Birds taste like?
 
6:58 PM
depends on hygiene and diet i suppose
 
@SeanGallardy-Microsoft I'm at your service, apparently
call me an UPFE
 
aspiring pfe
 
7:14 PM
let's not get crazy
 
@JoeObbish Nothing as such
 
glad that was short-lived!
 
@JoeObbish CCI-PFE
 
 
4 hours later…
10:58 PM
@sp_BlitzErik Erik I got a serious problem
 
@JoeObbish do tell
 
so I started watching a new anime
first season was pretty good
second season has been different so far
the first four episodes have been all about lizard people
who cares about lizard people????
what do I do?
 
is the lizard plotline season long?
do they have long forked tongues or just kinda licky tongues?
 
not sure on the tongues
I have no idea how long the plotline is
first time watching it
there's even a love story
who cares about love stories between lizard people? I mean come on
 
is there a wiki?
lizard love?
 
11:01 PM
a wiki on what?
 
your anime
 
not sure. isn't there always?
I try to avoid spoilers usually
 
how about
you tell me the name
and i'll investigate the lizard plotline
 
promise no spoilers?
 
11:28 PM
yeah
 
@JoeObbish 8671 for pruning, 8672 for discarding, but don't get carried away.
 
@sp_BlitzErik Overlord
@PaulWhite Thanks!
 
11:43 PM
In particular note that if you disable these normal optimizer limits, you can encourage the anti join anti pattern (local minima and whatnot). I'll leave you to explore that.
 
@JoeObbish did last season follow a similar pattern with multiple plotlines?
 
@sp_BlitzErik there weren't any lizard people
but I guess so
 
i'm not sure if one season covers multiple books or if each season covers a different book
but the lizard people book is #4 in the series, so it wouldn't make sense for season 2 to touch on that unless each season covers ~3 books
 
@sp_BlitzErik hmm
I guess it does
so it sounds like I'm good then
thanks
 
@PaulWhite are those plan affecting or cool output?
 
11:50 PM
 
cool, thanks
 
Yep I've deliberately never publicized those.
Much like 8780 that other one they will get misunderstood and misused.
 
@sp_BlitzErik you can't read that?
 
@JoeObbish ??
 
you can't want to be a query plan master and not know Russian
 

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