The DMZ

kalina

14:00

he has a bit of wandering hand syndrome but nothing that can't be handled with a few swift feet stamps

M'vy

:D

kalina

I'm not optimistic because I've already assumed this will end in a spectacular fashion

M'vy

There are two types of spectacular

kalina

there is no foundation for anything serious anyway because he doesn't know what I do for a living and the best he gets out of me is "I work weekends"

M'vy

@kalina don't tell me you met online ?

kalina

14:05

ew no

"internet dating" doesn't fulfil any of the things I actually want to... achieve

might as well just sit in a chat room talking to people

M'vy

huhu

@RоryMcCune I feel like there could be matter for a new awkward room title there

Arperum

@kalina Shadow of Mordor suffered from that too :( The game was a shitton of fun, but the endfight was a bloody quicktime event...

kalina

this room doesn't need a new topic, it has a perfectly on topic topic

@Arperum and Tomb Raider

Deus Ex Human Revolution was literally a room with four buttons in it though

M'vy

@kalina yeah that was sad.

Like that boring room title

kalina

That boring room title is on topic

unlike all of the things I've discussed since arriving here today

more reasons to do that less

Arperum

14:10

Why are you so fixated on the room title? It's not like you ever read that. The only time I actually read it is if someone points my attention to it.

kalina

I don't know

blame them

they're the ones

Arperum

I was busy doing so.

kalina

well FINE

M'vy

I don't know

I guess it used to be a cool gag. #oldjoke

kalina

and I'm sure over time you'll find something appropriate to set as the topic

Simon

14:34

The topics have been quite sucky lately.

Just like @AviD's mom.

AviD

wait wait, you seem to have that backwards

heh, just like I had your mom, last night

David-

Morning/Afternoon/Night all.

Simon

Night? Do we look like Australians to you?

pls I don't live with Kangaroos.

WHY DID I CAPITALIZE THE K?

kalina

@Simon I agree, they were fun but then started deviating wildly from the room's purpose

Simon

Some Brits would say that it sucks bolls.

kalina

14:43

well the dance music zone was really the end of it, when it ceased being apparent what the purpose of the room was

at least before we could say well we're a security room with a broad set of topics

David-

I think drinking room with a security problem sounds nice

Simon

Why not a security room with a drinking problem?

David-

Because thats what people would expect

Simon

Trust me, if they haven't met me, they can't expect what's inside the room.

When I'm naked at home, I ride ponies bareback

2

David-

My pony loves helicoptors

AviD

14:49

@Simon maybe you were talking about the Captain's family?

@David- naw, man, then everybody would get in and drink all your drinking drinks

@David- you seem new here, so I went easy on you.

fair warning though, if you get too graphic some mods may take liberties with your comments.

David-

@AviD Your observation would be correct. Move forward 3 spaces and draw a card. But not from the blue pile. you get a red card because you took liberties. :P

AviD

Well, welcome then.

David-

But yes, my pony does love helicoptors vry much

AviD

Beware the constantly shifting red line.

kalina

@Simon er, you have unprotected sex with ponies?

David-

14:53

omg, lol

Simon

WTF

kalina

obviously @AviD is too much of a fogey to understand bareback

but I think he actually made that sentence significantly worse with his edit

David-

lol, right!?!?

Simon

I feel like riding a horse naked would destroy my Timbits.

2

AviD

@kalina wut

how is that... where did you .... umm. Nevermind.

kalina

14:56

@AviD you changed his comment from a little boy playing with his penis to full on bestiality

David-

@Avid bareback is a term for unprotected sex these days since no one rides horses anymore.

AviD

@kalina how is that... where did you .... umm. Nevermind.

@David- RIDING A HORSE BAREBACK MEANS WITHOUT A SADDLE

Simon

"The freedom of filth is all about beastiality"

AviD

@RoryAlsop @RоryMcCune @Jefff tag I'm tagging you guys in, I think I need to step out the sidedoor for a few minutes

OMG IS "SIDEDOOR" ALSO A EUPHEMEISM FOR A PERVERTED SEX ACT

Simon

Damn it I wanted to say that.

kalina

14:57

@AviD well my first parse was "why would @AviD suggest I'd allow Simon to have unprotected sex with me"

and then my second parse was "oh he must actually mean pony since he knows that's never going to happen"

and ... well ...

AviD

I need a chrome filter that automatically pops up any urban dictionary entry every time I type something here.

kalina

@AviD is so on point that he he's just started saying on fleek weeks after it became on point

Simon

@kalina I feel like unprotected sex with you translates to immediate death.

AviD

@kalina uhh... what is on fleek?

kalina

@Simon that's pretty mean

Simon

14:59

:D

kalina

no, not :D

more like D:

David-

@kalina Be careful. We know he rides pony's bareback when hes naked. I think its a front.

kalina

I wonder if his donut knows he thinks of me when he's having sex with her

Simon

Dream the fuck on.

As far as I know, you're a man with a ween.

Some would say a weenman.

kalina

As far as I know, you're a dog

David-

15:03

I'm a cat with a poptart for a body

2

Simon

Because on the Internet, nobody knows you're a dog.

kalina

Coming straight out with the insults the moment I said that can only mean one thing, though

Simon

pls

kalina

you definitely think about me while having sex with her.

have you ever caught yourself just before saying my name instead of hers?

that would be a bit of a disaster

especially since she knows I exist

Simon

I don't say her name while doing it.

kalina

15:04

I'm always careful of guys who won't say your name while having sex with you

it means they're in defensive mode and they're probably cheaters

Simon

wtf

kalina

by not saying your name they're avoiding saying the wrong name

Simon

What would be the point of saying her name when she wouldn't even hear it due to her loud moaning?

David-

So much win

kalina

is that what actually happens or only in your head?

Simon

15:06

I guess you'll never find out.

kalina

is that my loss?

Simon

No, it's ovid's.

kalina

if she's moaning loud enough that she can't hear you, she's probably having sex with somebody else in her head

Simon

Or I'm just that good, y'know.

Journeyman Geek

@kalina o0

kalina

15:08

@JourneymanGeek you're definitely a dog

Journeyman Geek

just checking.

kalina

@Simon well I hope not.

AviD

This room was placed in timeout for 2 minutes; the topic of this room is "A discussion room nominally related to Information Security, but sometimes, not so much." - conversation should be limited to that topic.

WHOA

THIS IS NOT A SEX CHAT ROOM

6

or whatever you young'uns call them these days

reminding you of that (constantly shifting) red line

kalina

turning up 5 minutes after the conversation has stopped entirely and putting the room into a 2 minute cooldown is nothing less than acting like a complete prick for no reason

Simon

fkin rekt

kalina

15:18

especially after your bestiality mod abuse earlier

so... ceased being worth my time

Iszi

@AviD ...the hell? Did I miss out on all the fun because of a meeting again?

TildalWave

oww looks like I missed a fight :(

AviD

@kalina jeez, I wasnt the one who went to bestiality

and, was it really over? Like, really?

This is the DMZ, it's never over.

TildalWave

This is not a sex chat room? What am I supposed to do with that box of kleenex now? Cry?

3

@AviD I did wonder if they still teach kids what a (thin) red line is?

Simon

15:35

I take no responsibilities in whatever happened here, I'm just a little boy.

TildalWave

Scaramouch, scaramouch will you do the fandango?

(the pls dance)

Simon

Such an emotional dance.

Rоry McCune

15:49

@AviD I'm not a Mod, I have no power here

@TildalWave crymaxin' FTW

Rory Alsop

Afternoon - lolwut happen?

Crazy transcript

Rоry McCune

@RoryAlsop yeah they have no rories in the room for the afternoon and it all goes to pot!

David-

16:11

Avid had a little too much fun editing comments and it all went down hill from there

TildalWave

@RоryMcCune hahaha didn't think of that

David Freitag

Wauw such drama

@Simon That quote is perfect for ShitSESays

Iszi

@RоryMcCune That implies that you believe Mods actually do have power here. LOL. And the world's flat, too. Haha. You funny.

Rоry McCune

@Iszi well the specific power I'm referring to (editing posts) they do have :)

Simon

@DavidFreitag Does that mean that I'm getting millions out of copyrights?

Rоry McCune

16:25

and I don't

David Freitag

@Simon Erhm... No. No it doesn't.

Simon

o

David Freitag

@Iszi They can edit posts, nuke history, boot/ban, send messages to the trash (which @AviD apparently forgot about...), and do timeouts.

Iszi

@RоryMcCune I think one of the core tenets of our profession would imply that we actually do have that power... we just haven't figured out how to exercise it yet.

Iszi

16:57

Has anyone else noticed that WinPcap hasn't updated in over two years, while libpcap has been updated as recently as April?

David-

Nothing has really changed to need an update. Either libpcap had something needing fixed or the NSA has all your pron now?

Iszi

@David- I'm pretty sure Rule 34, among other things, ensures that "all the porn" is a constantly moving target.

David-

@Iszi damn rule 34....pfft...

There is porn of it. No exceptions

Iszi

@David- Heh. It just occurred to me that oversimplification and overapplication of Rule 34 could lead to temporal paradoxes.

David-

@Iszi I realized that as well. Now we wait for the blackhole to gain enough mass to prevent our escape.

Iszi

17:07

@David- Heh. I'm pretty sure that's not what people thought they were referring to, when they talked about the inevitable singularity.

David-

@Iszi Or maybe it was? Maybe its been Rule 34 all along and we just never realized it.

Iszi

Rule 34 is the singularity? Wonder if there's a Rule 34 for that?

David-

Rule 42? Don't forget to bring a towel?

if rule 34 is involved, rule 42 is probably a good idea due to the subject matter.

Iszi

So, Rule 34 and a Grandfather Paradox results in a black hole filled with towels, lube, and reproductive fluids that will consume the universe? Yeah, I'm pretty sure that's an apocalypse nobody saw coming.

David-

@Iszi, well all God really said was he wouldn't destroy the world with water again. Sounds legit.

Iszi

17:19

Yeah, I double-checked. It's not on Exit Mundi. So I'm pretty sure that's a new prophecy or something.

UsuallyNot

@RoraZ could you open a chat room, so I don't need to spam my question into the DMZ? It's about a vigenere question.

David-

@Iszi we could be the two prophets? Maybe we need to travel to Israel and spread the word and show them the dangers of how absorbent towels are? So absorbent they will adsorb the world?

Iszi

@David- No need to travel. Once @AviD catches up with the log, the word will already be there!

David-

@Iszi, that or our prophecies will be turned into pony beastiality. Strange things can happen when the ops travel back through time. They alter the future by forever changing the past.

Iszi

@David- Nah, pony bestiality is @Simon's thing. So let's just hope @AviD gets to it first.

Simon

17:26

Bestiality takes no "a"?

What a shitty fucking language English is.

David-

@Iszi, except that was one of the events @Avid forever changed. Simon used like helicopters and now he likes ponies.

Iszi

@David- No, we all know he always liked ponies. Helicopters, as with everything else in the DMZ, were just a euphemism.

Simon

I fucking hate horses.

David-

lol @simon's.donut

how do we get ponies as a tag on the room?

Simon

^_^

@David- We don't. The tags have never sucked so damn much.

No need to add ponies.

Look how dumb it looks: ponies

David-

17:31

what abt pwnies?

Xander

@UsuallyNot Look at what's in here. You really think you could post something that would be less useful than the current content?

Simon

@simon's.donut pls say "allu" to da people

David-

@Xander like poly-alphabetic substitution?

lady.donut

oh well hello da people

Simon

lulz

UsuallyNot

17:35

@Xander No, but this room seems to be more dedicated to fun or chitchat (hope that's the right word for it)

David-

The but sometimes, not so much clause is what we are exercising

Because its probably the only exercise some of us get

Simon

@UsuallyNot So does your mom.

EEEEYYYYYOOOOOO

Xander

@UsuallyNot This room also broke POODLE a week before it was going to be announced, forcing the embargo to be ended early.

Well, @ThomasPornin did anyway, but he did it in this room.

Iszi

@lady.donut Oh, look! Proof that @Simon can set up a sockpuppet!

Simon

@Iszi She switched her name!!!!

Iszi

17:40

@Simon Dude, I just replied to the message. The name is what chat made it to be. Don't blame me for the system's screwups.

user122738

Hello. A member told me: I was a moderator on Server Fault ...: does this mean moderators are not elected once forever?

Simon

@Iszi It was supposed to be a general statement, I didn't want to reply to you but it looks like I did newayz.

Iszi

@Begueradj Hmmm... Did they say something about taking an arrow to the knee?

lady.donut

@Iszi am no imposter

user122738

@Iszi I do not understand your question, sorry

user122738

17:43

@Iszi I understood ... no, he did not say that ... sorry

David-

Someone never played skyrim

Simon

Nor heard the reference that was fucking everywhere for a few months.

David-

right. Too much base 64

or not enough?

Xander

@Begueradj The most likely explanation is that they chose to step down for some reason. That happens from time to time.

user122738

@Xander I feel your explanation is right. Thank you sir.

David-

17:53

Simon

@lady.donut A/S/L?

Iszi

@Simon Wow. '90s IRC flashback.

Simon

That'd be '00s IRC flashback for me.

lady.donut

@Simon :3

Simon

LOL

Is that my weeny helicopter?

lady.donut

18:02

not exactly, I keep your weeny helicopter for myself

Simon

o

Should we call it my "Willycopter"?

lady.donut

@Simon lulz i like

David Freitag

Hey, no pillow talk in here, or @AviD will get even more grumpy!

Simon

ovid gets mad because he lives in a pyramid and he gets some sand in his thing.

5

David Freitag

Inside it? That's... not... You're doing it wrong.

David-

18:12

I think that a certain 'lady' has man parts, so the current convo would be right up there with the beasty topics @AviD started earlier. And Jesus @Simon, how.....what....noooo!

Simon

wot

David Freitag

@David- I know a certain lady who has lots of man parts laminated to her mantle.

David-

@DavidFreitag The bobbit chick?

David Freitag

@David- wat

Simon

dovid- just confused dovid

David-

18:16

@DavidFreitag lol, you know, the chick that likes to cut off peens. You said you knew a lady with them laminated on a mantle. Thought you knew her? Quite frankly I would be terrified to know her.

David Freitag

@David- No, I knew a girl in high school who was really good at controlling men. Those that have dated her are said to have their genitals laminated and glued to her mantle to this day.

Rоry McCune

@DavidFreitag is that even possible?

David Freitag

18:36

Woo my GitHub yubikey finally arrived..

Simon

Is it any different than a normal yubikey?

David Freitag

it was like $4.99

Simon

That's much cheaper.

David Freitag

Yeah GitHub publicly endorsed Yubikey and they sold a gazillion of them, so they did a sale

Simon

It's a nice device.

David Freitag

18:44

I probably won't ever end up using it, but it was like 60% off so I figured why not

Simon

You sound like a compulsive buyer.

David Freitag

@Simon the sale is still going on I think yubico.com/github-special-offer

@Simon No it was very well thought out. I get something now on a serious discount (<$10) and if I end up using it I save a bunch. If not I lose <$10

Simon

"Our GitHub-inspired YubiKeys have completely sold out"

pls

David Freitag

lol

AFAIK it's just a regular yubikey with a gihub octopus printed on the side with the thinnest paint in the world.

Simon

Yeah but if I would have been able to get a tray of 50 for 5$ each for work, that'd be great.

David Freitag

18:51

What, to resell them?

Simon

We wanted to purchase a bunch of keys to secure our in-house products but it never happened so that would have been a great way to bring the idea back.

I'm sure they don't care whether it's 5 or 25 bucks though.

David Freitag

I'm sure they would

Also I think it may have been $7.99 or maybe $8.99, but still a very good deal.

And I think you are only limited to one per customer too.

Simon

Meh, I guess it would have been a great argument to get it done quicker but whatevs.

Oh.

David Freitag

Unless you made 50 smurf github accounts

Simon

Not worth my time.

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