oh and that video yeah I did better I had them believing I was Rooney Mara

they had no idea who that was but still it was great. ive moved onto gas companies and debt collectors now the phone call is better fun

I am not liking this room much

:/

@Zanna why? so letting it better die?

@Videonauth no

I have faith that Eliah will return.

I should actually move a lot off off-topic stuff from the Downboat into here

I made use of the Ignore this user button

Hopefully that will improve things for me

But I'm an RO so I should probably not ignore people so that I can moderate

I enjoy the Downboat because it's purposeful and pleasant

I don't have as much time or energy for the site at the moment as I would like... can't see that improving in the near future

yeah i can understand that i actually struggle myself alot and i am a bit at my wits end

a lot of problems

of which i not know how to mange that all

my dad currently undergoes an operation to treat his cancer, and it is very dangerous for him du e to his overall health

I myself being so stressed out that i had to lay down earlier and then had some kind of k.o. situation wher my body simply shut down and put me to sleep

@Videonauth I didn't like the video. I kind of felt that it was joking at the expense of too many people. Like, anyone called Anil, and maybe people who actually need mobility scooters. I don't have a problem with you posting stuff you like, maybe just mention if stuff is NSFW.

@Videonauth oh no :( :(

ah ok i forgo that, i actually found it very funny

and im in need of all i can laugh about in some way lately

@Videonauth maybe your body is trying to help you out, but sounds very scary

you can savely trash that link tho if you want

yes it is scary

i fear being locked up again in mental heath care

its currently to much to bear

@Videonauth yeah, I guess it's a matter of taste. There's a brilliant author called Miranda July whose work I really like, but I find it completely devastating and painful to read because it's about experiences of feeling worthless and pathetic. But many people find her work funny. I can't imagine laughing, it makes me cry, but, many do laugh. So, matter of taste

Had so much planned for the new year to achieve and the current situation makes it all impossible

@Videonauth :( :(

I had some moments recently where I thought I can't bear this situation or find any way out and I'm going to lose my mind, so I can feel what you mean a little bit

People around me also not able to help

think i gonna log out of the chatrooms on this site, i haven't been able to spend much time here at all. you all know where to find me :D

feel yourself hugged even if its only a virtual hug

But found some ways to cope and survive and things are much better now. My brother helped me a lot

Lots of talking in the middle of the night. Fortunately my brother sleeps randomly haha

@edwinksl OK. But feel happy even seeing you in the userlist :)

@Videonauth hugs

You can get through this

You are going to make it

@Zanna i am always online, you know where to find me

@edwinksl :) thanks <3

<3

i will still be in AUGR in the foreseeable future

Nice

Sometimes i wish i would have someone to talk to and pour my heart out, but theres none except my cat

:(

Yeah it's terrible not having anyone who understands your feelings

yes my stepmother not even understands why i not have been by the side of my dad by now

easy said, but when you have only a few pennies left (4 penns to be exact) driving a few hundret kilometers without a car tho well

then my health insurance denies paying my medication, myself having a few overdu e bills , it all piles up

how you say, when it rains it pours

and the organisation which takes care of me will maybe not even help me further because of payment issues between government and this agency

this is to much , so much that i not even can reliev myself mentally in videogames and forget the world a little bit

The last thing you need is a pile of money problems :(

yeah more so if those make my life a hell, i only leave my flat once a week with a caretaker and now this is in peril

:(

makes me crazy, shall i starve and die because of government agencys have rules which no one really can comply with

Have to attend to some things in town now, back later

well have fun :)

@Videonauth yeah that's ridiculous

@Videonauth seems like your stepmum should be able to understand that

no she does not, maybe due to that she is from a very different generation

@Videonauth thanks... more like unpleasant necessity haha but Tamil lesson later should be enjoyable

my dad as well not understands my condition however how hard i try to explain it to them

@Videonauth :/