ok, i'm here

So, first of all, I will warn you that I'm too tired to understand subtleties. I'll take a look at it in the morning when I've had the sleep to hopefully understand the nuances, but...

I'm not there tonight.

that's fine. i know it's the long weekend.

I do know that uhoh has a kind of tendency for being a bit rough, but I think means well.

I wish that was an excuse, but it's really not...

in fact, it would have been a lot easier for me to be okay with this waiting until monday if i hadn't tried to raise an objection only to be completely ignored.

i have a lot of patience for uhoh, usually....

this one really bothered me. and then it really seemed the mods backed it.

As for your question, I will say, it's not the kind of question that I pay much attention to. It's very theoretical, and in a matter that I don't know a whole lot about.

oh, that's fine.

uhoh is usually write about technical things, but not always...

but that really isn't the issue. he insulted me.

Again, I'm not quite awake enough to really be understanding everything, but let me take a shot at this.

> you are proposing a reentry vehicle design, presumably you've done some independent reading about the atmosphere into which you plan for it to enter survivably. If you want to use SXSE, then maybe start with a more basic and targeted question about the physics of atmospheric entry. Something like "Why are survivable reentry windows so darn narrow?"

> @kimholder this isn't worldbuilding SE or designmyspacecraftforme SE or even shootdownmylastesthalfbakedidea SE.

From that chat message, that is the closest thing that I'm seeing right now as an insult.

Ahhh, that line.

the part i just posted is what i regard as a direct insult

Okay, thanks, it's easier for me to see this given my state with knowing exactly what I'm looking for.

sorry, i thought you were aware of that part already

LOL, no worries.

If I was more awake, I probably would see that, but...

that's saying i'm too lazy to do my own work, and that i just throw out ideas without thinking about them

uhoh knows me, and my work. that's uncalled for.

It seems like uhoh is mostly focused on the idea, not on you, which is at least somewhat reasonable. But I do agree with you, that as a regular, he should assume more of your abilities.

personally, i wouldn't consider that comment appropriate applied to anyone.

even when it really seems that's what's going on.

it's mean. it's meant to make someone feel bad.

Well, let me think on this. I'll let @called2voyage weigh in too.

I will agree with your last statement.

At least, the it's mean part.

i don't know if the way the recipient feels about it is usually considered in these things. but i want to say, this really upset me. a lot.

What I'm trying to decide, and failing to do at this moment, is to decide if uhoh was deliberately being mean, or just being offhanded.

I'm sorry that this site has in any way caused you to feel that way.

You are a valued member of this community, let me make that clear.

offhandedly really hurting someone's feelings is maybe ignorance or lack of self-awareness, but the result is the same.

This is quite true, but the proper way of dealing with the two varies somewhat.

and the thing is, a flag was ignored, my saying to Hoh that it bothered me was ignored, my request to have the question migrated because it bothered me was ignored, and in general, Hoh is very strangely quiet about this.

For the record, I tried to migrate it.

The bounty is still in effect, preventing it from being migrated.

also, it only occurred to me today that it is the long weekend, something i'd forgotten. so that eased my feelings a little bit.

Still.

this input will tide me over until you guys sort it out. just be aware i take this very seriously.

Hoh is very young. i don't want to pressure him. you guys? open season. :)

LOL.

I'm still going to sleep on it, but I think the best thing to do is to talk to him and let him know that you were upset by that particular comment.

But it's really past my bedtime, so...

sure. goodnight, Pearson.

My mind takes a noticable drop in it's ability to function after 10:00, and it's 11:00 here now, so...

'night.

@Hohmannfan ah, you're here... maybe i shouldn't have mentioned it in the Moonwards chat, then.

do you have an issue here?

one of the biggest difficulties about this for me was how to handle it without stepping on you somehow.

Looks like it ended up ok. Contacting more mods about this is the proper use escalation. It was difficult for me to continue without awkwardly arguing "no, you are not offended by this".

Regarding migration, do you believe there is a significant amount of new information to be gained from that? I am not sure. I will certainly say the question is not off topic here.

the migration issue was really my desperate attempt to at least get that comment off the site where i spend almost all my time.

handling people's feelings is the most difficult but most central purpose of a moderator. Talking about why you didn't think the comment was worth being offended by would have been the way to go.

if there was a reason why you didn't want to do that, it would have still been better to at least say that.

we've known each other for a while, we collaborate a great deal, you have been a big help to me, and both of us have been moderators.

it's important that you feel comfortable telling me what's on your mind.

because all your abilities aside, Hoh, from my perspective, you're 18. You're a kid. Being less familiar or comfortable in this territory is absolutely normal for someone so young.

@kimholder I've reviewed this having given it more thought, and I still stand by what I said last night.

I did, however, send a note off to him to consider his actions when being a contrarian. Hopefully that will resolve the issue.

ok. i did try drawing him into a chat about it when it first happened, but he would have none of that. i think in his mind i had ignored his repeated advice that would solve an issue with my spacecraft design, and i was ignoring it. something like that.

it would be good if he and i made peace, but that may take a bit...

i wonder if the remaining comments under his post should go now... they are really referring to a disagreement that it would be better if it blew over

oh look, he's in The Pod Bay...

Honestly, I would just ignore it.

You have a good answer. Your question was a valid one for this site.

ok

Uhoh really does mean well, although it doesn't always come across that way... I've often been at the receiving end of his attention.

yeah, i know. i'm less patient with him than i used to be because i have less time to spare.

The simple answer then is to not spare him the time.

I know, easier said than done, but...