2:00 AM
I like this answer, but something to add - when asking for her to pick up some extra chores keep in mind that she may already be doing this! and you just haven't noticed yet. Because she has verbally asked you this favour, it means she acknowledges that you are doing something extra and it would be quite normal for her to take it upon herself to do something else without you even saying anything. Doesn't really change the answer as you should still ask, just be mindful of how you ask incase this turns out to be true. — Jesse 34 secs ago
#17559 Jesse (4955 rep) | A: Roommate says she won't/can't take out trash. How to ask for compensation? (score: 2) | posted 5 hours ago by Monica Cellio (14778 rep) | Toxicity 0.1337799
2:22 AM
@ArwenUndómiel Surprised with a Seinfeld skit that it'd be relegated to a try this answer. — axsvl77 33 secs ago
#17551 axsvl77 (686 rep) | A: Ask a girl whether she would like to come back to a hotel with me on a night out without being creepy (score: -1) | posted 25 hours ago by axsvl77 (686 rep) | Toxicity 0.120553724 | edited 1 minutes ago by axsvl77 (686 rep)
2:59 AM
Do you think its possible that unlike you, Alice wants to talk about her own rough phase? If this is true, then you "respecting her endurance" is the opposite of what she is seeking. It seems possible she is bringing up your experiences as a way to talk about her own. Do you have any additional insight here? — Jesse 1 min ago
#17558 Jesse (4955 rep) | Q: Politely replying to a friend to not have a conversation about past incidents (score: 0) | posted 8 hours ago by Sara (61 rep) | Toxicity 0.25993615
Some people claim that because quite frankly it's true. Whether it's fair or not and whether you like it or not, plenty of people will be put off by someone asking for permission to have sex with them. I have the utmost respect for anyone who isn't put off by this, but we can't choose how we feel. — Edmund Reed 15 secs ago
#17509 Edmund Reed (101 rep) | A: Ask a girl whether she would like to come back to a hotel with me on a night out without being creepy (score: 100) | posted 2 days ago by Andrew (3309 rep) | Toxicity 0.43099752 | edited 2 days ago by Andrew (3309 rep)
4:01 AM
Agreed. When I am around they act friendly for the most part, however I know this is just a facade and have been able to usually figure out what their actual feelings towards me are. Also, I have added some more information as well as provided an unfortunate update to the situation in this post. — ZYR 38 secs ago
#17557 ZYR (47 rep) | A: How do I help my girlfriend defend herself against manipulative parents? (score: 1) | posted 10 hours ago by Loronzo (11 rep) | Toxicity 0.04648574
4:54 AM
I thought when I said that "I was approached by a co-worker" it was clear that we were in person. Further, I wasn't asking for a script; I was hoping to see if anyone else in a medical lab setting (or similar) had successfully found a way to dissuade others from even initiating conversation in the first place without seeming antisocial. — SubduedBlonde 36 secs ago
#17546 SubduedBlonde (6 rep) | Q: Polite way to say "Don't bother me right now!" (score: 0) | posted 31 hours ago by SubduedBlonde (6 rep) | Toxicity 0.2063663
5:35 AM
Please bear in mind that your emotional health is at risk in all this. Some people's lives are just all drama, sad as it is, and by volunteering to rescue her you are putting yourself in danger and depriving yourself of the opportunity of meeting someone who will have a positive impact for your happiness and your future. Wouldn't you rather start clean and meet a nice gal whom you can have good times with, get married to and have a family with? — Duke Leto 57 secs ago
#17562 Duke Leto (678 rep) | Q: How do I help my girlfriend get out of this dangerous situation with her parents? (score: 1) | posted 1 hours ago by ZYR (52 rep) | Toxicity 0.17580485 | edited 57 minutes ago by ZYR (52 rep)
I'm voting to close this question as off-topic because this is asking about how to get married and off-site resources, which is too broad and primarily opinion based and has nothing to do with Interpersonal Skills. — A J ♦ 51 secs ago
#17563 A J (6238 rep) | Q: How can i get marry with my girlfriend? (score: -1) | posted 3 minutes ago by Rohit Gautam (1 rep) | Toxicity 0.15036123
#17563 Rohit Gautam (1 rep) | Q: How can i get marry with my girlfriend? (score: -1) | posted 4 minutes ago by Rohit Gautam (1 rep) | Toxicity 0.2002221
5:56 AM
Googling how to get married online would be more helpful, this isn't really about interpersonal skills — SomeoneElse 1 min ago
#17563 SomeoneElse (2817 rep) | Q: How can i get marry with my girlfriend? (score: -3) | posted 19 minutes ago by Rohit Gautam (1 rep) | Toxicity 0.12653683
#17563 Ash (1712 rep) | Q: How can i get marry with my girlfriend? (score: -3) | posted 28 minutes ago by Rohit Gautam (1 rep) | Toxicity 0.08638337
@rohit also, no, this isn't the place for this question, we deal with helping you work on skills like effective communication and the like, not legal type formalities like you are looking for - we aren't a recommendation service. — Ash 22 secs ago
#17563 Ash (1712 rep) | Q: How can i get marry with my girlfriend? (score: -3) | posted 29 minutes ago by Rohit Gautam (1 rep) | Toxicity 0.03607107
6:17 AM
@DukeLeto Over the course of this relationship I have weighed out the worth of it all and determined that I am willing to stay. Not only does she make me really happy but I also do believe in a future with her. She is a great person. I am not depressed and nor am I letting the stress get to me. My main concern is helping her. She is not the cause of the problem. I believe if she can get some space from her parents and can also get her some professional help, things will get a lot better. — ZYR 31 secs ago
#17562 ZYR (52 rep) | Q: How do I help my girlfriend get out of this dangerous situation with her parents? (score: 1) | posted 2 hours ago by ZYR (52 rep) | Toxicity 0.043082997 | edited 1 hours ago by ZYR (52 rep)
6:28 AM
Agreed, I doubt the way they treat her will ever change significantly. How would we go about breaking contact from her family if she isn't the legal adult age yet? I agree about the professional psychological help, but how would I go about getting that for her right now as well? Unfortunately, I don't have much power over her parents in this situation. Also, in that second statement.. are you referring to a service like DCF? — ZYR 1 min ago
#17564 ZYR (52 rep) | A: How do I help my girlfriend get out of this dangerous situation with her parents? (score: 1) | posted 9 minutes ago by YElm (1760 rep) | Toxicity 0.07067062
I don't know enough about the US child and youth protection system to give you more information, but my understanding is that if the parents pose a threat to their child, the child has a right to get help and be seperated from said threat even before reaching legal age. Get all the evidence you can and let the system do its work. — YElm 6 secs ago
#17564 YElm (1760 rep) | A: How do I help my girlfriend get out of this dangerous situation with her parents? (score: 1) | posted 14 minutes ago by YElm (1760 rep) | Toxicity 0.14108513
7:09 AM
#17565 Kozaky (5399 rep) | Q: In which Stack Exchange or any web site should I promote my Kickstarter campaign? (score: -1) | posted 7 minutes ago by Gerardo Martinez (1 rep) | Toxicity 0.078445785
Welcome! StackExchange is no advertisement service. If your campaign is relevant to answer a question for example you could post the link to it as long as you explain exactly how it solves the problem that was asked for and your answer stands on its own even after the campaign is over or if the site is ever taken down. Other than that certain chats might allow it. But again, only if it's relevant and you are not coming across as a spammer. Which you currently are. How to not be a spammer.. Please take the tour and help center. Have fun on the site — Secespitus 1 min ago
#17565 Secespitus (1282 rep) | Q: In which Stack Exchange or any web site should I promote my Kickstarter campaign? (score: -1) | posted 7 minutes ago by Gerardo Martinez (1 rep) | Toxicity 0.07466
I'm voting to close this question as off-topic because it is not a question about interpersonal skills. — Kozaky 54 secs ago
#17565 Kozaky (5399 rep) | Q: In which Stack Exchange or any web site should I promote my Kickstarter campaign? (score: -2) | posted 9 minutes ago by Gerardo Martinez (1 rep) | Toxicity 0.15269408
7:47 AM
#17562 Flo (1070 rep) | Q: How do I help my girlfriend get out of this dangerous situation with her parents? (score: 3) | posted 3 hours ago by ZYR (62 rep) | Toxicity 0.06236251 | edited 3 hours ago by ZYR (62 rep)
8:14 AM
ZYR I am glad you have weighed this, panic and compassion can cause you to neglect your own well-being. It's not unheard of for persons trying to save the life of someone who is drowning to also drown in the process. It is noble, yes, but beware the cost. — Duke Leto 57 secs ago
#17562 Duke Leto (678 rep) | Q: How do I help my girlfriend get out of this dangerous situation with her parents? (score: 3) | posted 4 hours ago by ZYR (62 rep) | Toxicity 0.23754409 | edited 3 hours ago by ZYR (62 rep)
9:09 AM
#17026 JCO9 (168 rep) | A: How to ask the girl I am dating if she likes me? (score: 4) | posted 16 days ago by ThinkTank (156 rep) | Toxicity 0.044161364
9:22 AM
#17568 Astralbee (16128 rep) | Q: What to tell family who ask about a friend I had a falling out with? (score: 1) | posted 17 minutes ago by Donttryit (49 rep) | Toxicity 0.12136795
It sounds like both parents suffer from NPD. I'd advise the two of you to look at some of the stuff at reddit.com/r/raisedbynarcissists and compare. If it fits... Narcissist tend to make their victims think "they're doing it all for them", so it could help your GF to observe and judge the behaviour in other people - it's easier to say "this stranger is abusive" than to come to terms with "my parents are abusive". I'd advise you to post the story there, too - you'll get a ton of experienced advice, even techniques like e.g. "grey rocking" etc. — R. Schmitz 29 secs ago
#17562 R. Schmitz (101 rep) | Q: How do I help my girlfriend get out of this dangerous situation with her parents? (score: 6) | posted 5 hours ago by ZYR (77 rep) | Toxicity 0.19270973 | edited 4 hours ago by ZYR (77 rep)
I feel this is the best advice... Yo can´t let them know about your plans. Try to deal with the situation as best as possible, and help your girlfriend move out without letting her parents know until the last moment, so they have no time to react and force her into staying with them. Of course, as many people are already suggesting, get professional help for your GF in the meantime. — patch 1 min ago
#17567 patch (408 rep) | A: How do I help my girlfriend get out of this dangerous situation with her parents? (score: 6) | posted 38 minutes ago by Belle-Sophie (2534 rep) | Toxicity 0.06879319
Can you provide an explanation for why you think this will address the OP's concern of not being creepy? We expect answers to be more substantial than just saying "do this". — sphennings 1 min ago
#17555 sphennings (7822 rep) | A: Ask a girl whether she would like to come back to a hotel with me on a night out without being creepy (score: -8) | posted 22 hours ago by user20871 (1 rep) | Toxicity 0.21497868
10:02 AM
It might help to include your age. From my experience, the older people get, the less likely they are going to implode when facing what might be interpreted as judgement, criticism and in general being addressed because of their shortcomings. If you are both say 15, I get that you have to touch him in the least offensive way possible — Raditz_35 42 secs ago
#17570 Raditz_35 (189 rep) | Q: How to recommend meditation to someone with anxiety? (score: -1) | posted 18 minutes ago by Inertial Ignorance (121 rep) | Toxicity 0.08417157
I'm voting to close this question because I feel that the recommendation of a particular kind of treatment or therapy is off-topic for the site and actually quite dangerous. We don't know that meditation is a good idea for this person. — Astralbee 55 secs ago
#17570 Astralbee (16146 rep) | Q: How to recommend meditation to someone with anxiety? (score: -1) | posted 18 minutes ago by Inertial Ignorance (121 rep) | Toxicity 0.175349
@Jesse I am not sure about it. She never gave me any hints about it and even if she had, I could have missed it. How to guess if she wants me to talk about it at all? — Sara 2 mins ago
#17558 Sara (61 rep) | Q: Politely replying to a friend to not have a conversation about past incidents (score: 0) | posted 16 hours ago by Sara (61 rep) | Toxicity 0.035611145
10:47 AM
#17570 YElm (1870 rep) | Q: How to recommend meditation to someone with anxiety? (score: 0) | posted 1 hours ago by Inertial Ignorance (126 rep) | Toxicity 0.016665153
11:40 AM
OP is asking how to get the girl to the hotel, not in bed (although one implies the other..., he'd first have to get her there). — Belle-Sophie 1 min ago
#17556 Belle-Sophie (2614 rep) | A: Ask a girl whether she would like to come back to a hotel with me on a night out without being creepy (score: -1) | posted 19 hours ago by Loronzo (31 rep) | Toxicity 0.2037668
11:51 AM
Are you sure Bob really needs budgeting help? Does Bob or his wife usually have high spending habits? From the way the question is phrased it looks like he just received a lot of unexpected bills he needs to pay, not that he's bad with money in general. — TheRealLester 1 min ago
#17566 TheRealLester (5877 rep) | Q: Politely recommend budget help to a debtor? (score: 1) | posted 3 hours ago by dma (106 rep) | Toxicity 0.12396641
12:08 PM
#15820 Ahsan (499 rep) | A: How to phase someone out of my life (score: 13) | posted 52 days ago by Cronax (2348 rep) | Toxicity 0.14709203
If it's a possibility to get: You might want to add a singular exception stating that if the contact keeps ocurring, she'll get a restraining order, or go to the police for harassment. Simply ignoring is clearly not working. If a 'no' isnt working, it might be time for a 'NO'. — Martijn 51 secs ago
#14202 Martijn (3247 rep) | A: How to deal with my ex who told me to never talk to him again but still texts me? (score: 5) | posted 96 days ago by swbarnes2 (1832 rep) | Toxicity 0.27199703
12:36 PM
Very related question: workplace.stackexchange.com/questions/54312/…. That question might offer you some answers that don't focus on Interpersonal Skills as well :) — Tinkeringbell ♦ 1 min ago
#17573 Tinkeringbell (19129 rep) | Q: How can I prevent people from touching my laptop screen with their finger? (score: 1) | posted 9 minutes ago by Supreme Grand Ruler (721 rep) | Toxicity 0.0682964 | edited 3 minutes ago by Supreme Grand Ruler (721 rep)
Thank you @Tinkeringbell. I will check it out. I think the details of my questions focus too much on work, but even friends and school mates will often touch my screen. Basically anyone I show it to. — Supreme Grand Ruler 1 min ago
#17573 Supreme Grand Ruler (726 rep) | Q: How can I prevent people from touching my laptop screen with their finger? (score: 2) | posted 12 minutes ago by Supreme Grand Ruler (726 rep) | Toxicity 0.02578238 | edited 1 minutes ago by Supreme Grand Ruler (726 rep)
@TheRealLester if someone has a good job and is having trouble paying for a "family trip" or "refinancing", that someone is bad with money. Those aren't sudden emergency expenses. And even if they were, one of the first pieces of financial advise is to have an emergency fund. — DaveG 47 secs ago
#17566 DaveG (1354 rep) | Q: Politely recommend budget help to a debtor? (score: 1) | posted 3 hours ago by dma (106 rep) | Toxicity 0.11630869
@Flo before posting this question I did try to look at the all sites page to see if maybe there was a more suitable place to be posting this situation. I must have not seen Law Stack Exchange. Thank you, this will be helpful! — ZYR 51 secs ago
#17562 ZYR (82 rep) | Q: How do I help my girlfriend get out of this dangerous situation with her parents? (score: 7) | posted 8 hours ago by ZYR (82 rep) | Toxicity 0.018210895 | edited 8 hours ago by ZYR (82 rep)
#17564 ZYR (82 rep) | A: How do I help my girlfriend get out of this dangerous situation with her parents? (score: 18) | posted 6 hours ago by YElm (1930 rep) | Toxicity 0.008989418
1:01 PM
Just to back up @Yelm's comment, this article is quite interesting psychologytoday.com/us/blog/the-science-behind-behavior/201604/… It isn't saying Mindfulness meditation is a bad thing, but it does discuss reasons why 'participants should be screened carefully for their suitability before undertaking this practice, and its teachers should be properly trained and supervised'. — Spagirl 37 secs ago
#17570 Spagirl (11029 rep) | Q: How to recommend meditation to someone with anxiety? (score: 0) | posted 3 hours ago by Inertial Ignorance (126 rep) | Toxicity 0.08658552
Hey, thanks for the answer! Can you please explain exactly why you think that this is a good idea? Why do you say to take this course of action? What’s the thought process behind this answer? As this currently stands, this is essentially a “Try this!” answer. We require that answers provide some sort of explanation for why they are suggesting this solution, and unfortunately, at the moment this answer doesn't appear to do that. — ElizB 23 secs ago
#17572 ElizB (1180 rep) | A: Ask a girl whether she would like to come back to a hotel with me on a night out without being creepy (score: 0) | posted 1 hours ago by (deleted user) | Toxicity 0.054823764
Given the tag, I assume this is happening in the US. Even though she is a minor, her property is still hers. Her parents are taking it all away. That sounds illegal - I second the recommendation to post on Law Stack Exchange. — Solomonoff's Secret 1 min ago
#17562 Solomonoff's Secret (101 rep) | Q: How do I help my girlfriend get out of this dangerous situation with her parents? (score: 8) | posted 9 hours ago by ZYR (87 rep) | Toxicity 0.07195422 | edited 8 hours ago by ZYR (87 rep)
A fantastic question, but here are two suggestions: a) Ranting and not being super nice is frowned upon. Try to keep your judging to yourself and just include the facts. I think this is particularly important because you make a couple of assumptions you cannot know for sure like " he will be absolutely miserable". If I know the internet, people will focus on telling you how wrong you are or how wrong you could be given x y and z instead of helping you with your issue. Don't give them room for distraction. b) Include your age — Raditz_35 1 min ago
#17574 Raditz_35 (189 rep) | Q: Dealing With Someone Who Believes They Are Being Treated Unfairly Constantly? (score: 1) | posted 16 minutes ago by Imperator (271 rep) | Toxicity 0.20287617
#17568 Cashbee (3452 rep) | Q: What to tell family who ask about a friend I had a falling out with? (score: 8) | posted 4 hours ago by Donttryit (89 rep) | Toxicity 0.059971172
Depending on the state you're in, your girlfriend may be able to move already (unless laws have changed semi-recently). My girlfriend moved in with me the day she turned 17 because of similar, though not quite so severe, issues. We've now been together for 10+ years :) also, you can set up a bank account in your name along with your girlfriend's name and she can have her money direct-deposited there (again, from personal experience, this is what I did) — user20896 1 min ago
#17562 user20896 (101 rep) | Q: How do I help my girlfriend get out of this dangerous situation with her parents? (score: 8) | posted 9 hours ago by ZYR (87 rep) | Toxicity 0.10754844 | edited 8 hours ago by ZYR (87 rep)
1:25 PM
Sorry if the question doesn't make it clear, but there is a historical context of minimal savings, and it seems it's catching up this year, hence the question. — dma 11 secs ago
#17566 dma (106 rep) | Q: Politely recommend budget help to a friend who owes me money? (score: 1) | posted 4 hours ago by dma (106 rep) | Toxicity 0.02483601 | edited 6 minutes ago by dma (106 rep)
The question seems to be geared towards asking "what should I do?" Which would generate more opinion based answers and not help you in finding the right answer. Can you edit it to narrow it down to a specific interpersonal goal, like your first question "How do I approach them about choosing different songs to play?" Your second question is primarily opinion based. We can't tell you accurately whether you are wrong or right, but we can recommend how you approach them. — ElizB 1 min ago
#17577 ElizB (1180 rep) | Q: How to convince my band members to play different songs? (score: 0) | posted 8 minutes ago by Michele Ippolito (101 rep) | Toxicity 0.10754445
I edited according to your suggestion. I also removed the secondary question, I'll discuss that specific matter with my teacher. — Michele Ippolito 29 secs ago
#17577 Michele Ippolito (101 rep) | Q: How to convince my band members to play different songs? (score: 0) | posted 11 minutes ago by Michele Ippolito (101 rep) | Toxicity 0.037633516 | edited 1 minutes ago by Michele Ippolito (101 rep)
@Raditz_35 Thank you for the suggestions, I have edited them in. And that is a very good point, I had not considered the way it made be considered a s a rant. — Imperator 13 secs ago
#17574 Imperator (281 rep) | Q: Dealing With Someone Who Believes They Are Being Treated Unfairly Constantly? (score: 3) | posted 46 minutes ago by Imperator (281 rep) | Toxicity 0.04306353 | edited 10 minutes ago by Imperator (281 rep)
Do the two people constantly outvote you and you only get to play their songs? Currently your question could be interpreted as: "I want the band to only play the songs I think are of value. How do I get them to do that despite us voting for what we want?" Having played in many, many bands, I think your assumption "we are supposed to be studying hard rock or blues" is nothing but pure opinion. Some people do it that way, maybe traditionally it is done that way, but that doesn't mean you have to. Are you just saying: "I've learned it like this, I think it's optimal, now we have to do it!" ? — Raditz_35 1 min ago
#17577 Raditz_35 (189 rep) | Q: How to convince my band members to play different songs? (score: 0) | posted 21 minutes ago by Michele Ippolito (101 rep) | Toxicity 0.13095713 | edited 11 minutes ago by Michele Ippolito (101 rep)
One angle is ignored here; a couple can decide on a lifestyle where the man provides the money, while the woman's job is to fulfill her wifely duties, look after the kids alone and make sure she and the house are presentable when guests come over. Archaic, but a couple has the right to choose this way. Its pretty clear that you want a more modern style, but your GF might not. Have you guys had a talk about how you imagine your future relationships? — R. Schmitz 16 secs ago
#15710 R. Schmitz (101 rep) | Q: Relationship - dealing with different views about spending money (who should pay for what) (score: 25) | posted 55 days ago by InsertSquirrel (131 rep) | Toxicity 0.22136742 | edited 54 days ago by TheRealLester (5877 rep)
2:16 PM
@RohitGautam - nobody here is providing a service to you. The people here answering questions are unpaid volunteers, not paid service providers. — brhans 8 secs ago
#17563 brhans (105 rep) | Q: How can i get marry with my girlfriend? (score: -8) | posted 8 hours ago by Rohit Gautam (1 rep) | Toxicity 0.11520209 | edited 2 hours ago by avazula (6618 rep)
#17574 Federico (882 rep) | Q: Dealing With Someone Who Believes They Are Being Treated Unfairly Constantly? (score: 4) | posted 1 hours ago by Imperator (286 rep) | Toxicity 0.11093736 | edited 52 minutes ago by Imperator (286 rep)
Had a quick talk with Tony and he was completely fine with me dating Alice. And she was ok too so everything is fine ! Thanks you all :) — Orime Tsovo 9 secs ago
#17286 Orime Tsovo (59 rep) | A: Relationship with a friend's ex-girlfriend (score: 27) | posted 10 days ago by Will Appleby (1755 rep) | Toxicity 0.01881972 | edited 9 days ago by ale10ander (103 rep)
@Federico That's pretty minor, and is there a reason you would leave the comment instead of editing it yourself? — Upper_Case 53 secs ago
#17574 Upper_Case (6214 rep) | Q: Dealing With Someone Who Believes They Are Being Treated Unfairly Constantly? (score: 4) | posted 1 hours ago by Imperator (286 rep) | Toxicity 0.11559292 | edited 56 minutes ago by Imperator (286 rep)
@Federico That annoys me too, and I have fixed it. Forgot to doublecheck grammar. Must have slipped by. — Imperator 30 secs ago
#17574 Imperator (286 rep) | Q: Dealing With Someone Who Believes They Are Being Treated Unfairly Constantly? (score: 4) | posted 1 hours ago by Imperator (286 rep) | Toxicity 0.30088645 | edited 1 minutes ago by Imperator (286 rep)
#17574 Upper_Case (6214 rep) | Q: Dealing With Someone Who Believes They Are Being Treated Unfairly Constantly? (score: 4) | posted 1 hours ago by Imperator (286 rep) | Toxicity 0.07690946 | edited 4 minutes ago by Imperator (286 rep)
#17574 Federico (882 rep) | Q: Dealing With Someone Who Believes They Are Being Treated Unfairly Constantly? (score: 4) | posted 1 hours ago by Imperator (286 rep) | Toxicity 0.04295861 | edited 4 minutes ago by Imperator (286 rep)
#17574 Federico (882 rep) | Q: Dealing With Someone Who Believes They Are Being Treated Unfairly Constantly? (score: 4) | posted 1 hours ago by Imperator (286 rep) | Toxicity 0.14848278 | edited 4 minutes ago by Imperator (286 rep)
2:48 PM
Also another point to highly, she stopped cutting herself only 3 months ago, that is not so long ago, there is no guarantee she won't start again soon considering how her parents are treating her so Child Welfare will probably take that into account too. She is already 17 maybe they can get her to emancipate and move earlier with him, since they are a danger to her. — Mykazuki 1 min ago
#17567 Mykazuki (1063 rep) | A: How do I help my girlfriend get out of this dangerous situation with her parents? (score: 33) | posted 5 hours ago by Belle-Sophie (2674 rep) | Toxicity 0.25424284
#17509 user19312 (101 rep) | A: Ask a girl whether she would like to come back to a hotel with me on a night out without being creepy (score: 119) | posted 3 days ago by Andrew (3449 rep) | Toxicity 0.07331617 | edited 2 days ago by Andrew (3449 rep)
@user19312 you're just repeating what the other person said. My response is the same. There are many ways someone can say "no", each of which can mean different things. Without specifics I'd have to either write a book, or make unwarranted assumptions. I suggest you post this as a separate question. — Andrew 49 secs ago
#17509 Andrew (3449 rep) | A: Ask a girl whether she would like to come back to a hotel with me on a night out without being creepy (score: 119) | posted 3 days ago by Andrew (3449 rep) | Toxicity 0.13123484 | edited 3 days ago by Andrew (3449 rep)
@Andrew if you think that, then no offense, but you misunderstood both of us. We're not saying you should describe how to say no (not sure where you got that from). We said you should mention that it's OK IF THEY say no. Literally one sentence saying "if she says no, it's ok" is all we're saying. This has no need for context, and no need for more details. It does not need a books worth of description, nor any unwarranted assumptions. Again, as I said, you don't have to. You just seem to be vastly misunderstanding the suggestion. — user19312 13 secs ago
#17509 user19312 (101 rep) | A: Ask a girl whether she would like to come back to a hotel with me on a night out without being creepy (score: 119) | posted 3 days ago by Andrew (3449 rep) | Toxicity 0.22135755 | edited 3 days ago by Andrew (3449 rep)
#17505 Pickle (212 rep) | Q: Ask a girl whether she would like to come back to a hotel with me on a night out without being creepy (score: 40) | posted 3 days ago by Pickle (212 rep) | Toxicity 0.22686619 | edited 43 hours ago by Em C (8551 rep)
3:17 PM
On the other post you say that your girlfriend "is 17". Here you say she is "18+". Which is it? The difference is very important in the U.S. — RBarryYoung just now
#17562 RBarryYoung (101 rep) | Q: How do I help my girlfriend get out of this dangerous situation with her parents? (score: 14) | posted 11 hours ago by ZYR (127 rep) | Toxicity 0.39228278 | edited 10 hours ago by ZYR (127 rep)
#17562 RBarryYoung (101 rep) | Q: How do I help my girlfriend get out of this dangerous situation with her parents? (score: 14) | posted 11 hours ago by ZYR (127 rep) | Toxicity 0.02982384 | edited 10 hours ago by ZYR (127 rep)
@Solomonoff'sSecret If she is a minor (under 18), then it probably is not illegal here in the US. Though I absolutely agree with taking this to the Law forum to be sure. — RBarryYoung 10 secs ago
#17562 RBarryYoung (101 rep) | Q: How do I help my girlfriend get out of this dangerous situation with her parents? (score: 14) | posted 11 hours ago by ZYR (127 rep) | Toxicity 0.12568757 | edited 10 hours ago by ZYR (127 rep)
#17575 Taladris (528 rep) | A: What to tell family who ask about a friend I had a falling out with? (score: 2) | posted 2 hours ago by R. Schmitz (121 rep) | Toxicity 0.38455755
@RBarryYoung it's illegal if it's actually her property i.e. stuff she paid for. You also can't just spring a rent agreement on someone in the states; they need to agree to it in order for it to be remotely legal. — Steve 15 secs ago
#17562 Steve (152 rep) | Q: How do I help my girlfriend get out of this dangerous situation with her parents? (score: 14) | posted 11 hours ago by ZYR (127 rep) | Toxicity 0.13227268 | edited 10 hours ago by ZYR (127 rep)
#17562 ZYR (132 rep) | Q: How do I help my girlfriend get out of this dangerous situation with her parents? (score: 14) | posted 11 hours ago by ZYR (132 rep) | Toxicity 0.18987474 | edited 10 hours ago by ZYR (132 rep)
@user19312 I've added a brief edit in response to your request. To me it feels incomplete, but it's either that or play a time-consuming game of "what-if". — Andrew 19 secs ago
#17509 Andrew (3449 rep) | A: Ask a girl whether she would like to come back to a hotel with me on a night out without being creepy (score: 121) | posted 3 days ago by Andrew (3449 rep) | Toxicity 0.07941056 | edited 1 minutes ago by Andrew (3449 rep)
This sounds quite naive. The parents likely have many more connections who can support their case than the kids do. — mathreadler 12 secs ago
#17582 mathreadler (129 rep) | A: How do I help my girlfriend get out of this dangerous situation with her parents? (score: 0) | posted 10 minutes ago by Steve (152 rep) | Toxicity 0.1903901
@DukeLeto, there's a difference between drama and what's going on here. When I think of drama, it's stuff people bring on themselves, usually by being stupid, nosy, a gossip, or some combination of those traits. This is a child that is being abused and wants/needs to get out of the situation. If you saw someone physically beating their kid(s) with a baseball bat, would you stop them or just "keep going" and "avoid the drama"? Mental abuse is roughly the same as physical abuse, except that mental abuse is usually worse. — computercarguy 45 secs ago
#17562 computercarguy (331 rep) | Q: How do I help my girlfriend get out of this dangerous situation with her parents? (score: 14) | posted 12 hours ago by ZYR (132 rep) | Toxicity 0.5849219 | edited 11 hours ago by ZYR (132 rep)
@mathreadler if the courts don't care, you're stuck. Taking away someone's money is not a joke. A legal fight needs to be made even if it's lost. OP should look for a lawyer who needs to do some free work so that they can actually afford it. It's also pretty hard to "support a case with connection" when there's literally no medical records of this being required at all, but there are records of her accounts being drained because of banks. You give parents too much credit. Her parents were sloppy here. Sounds like GF has a job too. — Steve just now
#17582 Steve (152 rep) | A: How do I help my girlfriend get out of this dangerous situation with her parents? (score: 0) | posted 20 minutes ago by Steve (152 rep) | Toxicity 0.3335287
Maybe they were sloppy because they were confident how things would play out. I have heard many stories where the one with best connections wins this kind of thing. — mathreadler 30 secs ago
#17582 mathreadler (129 rep) | A: How do I help my girlfriend get out of this dangerous situation with her parents? (score: 0) | posted 25 minutes ago by Steve (152 rep) | Toxicity 0.10715673
@mathreadler That's a solid point, but like I said earlier, this is pretty serious and needs to be addressed by the law anyway. GF&CO have a lot more to gain than they have to use. If she's 17+ she should be able to move out in most of the US anyway. I don't know if her visa allows that. What I'm getting at, is that GF&CO need legal advice even if they can't just sue the pants off of the parents . — Steve 1 min ago
#17582 Steve (152 rep) | A: How do I help my girlfriend get out of this dangerous situation with her parents? (score: 0) | posted 28 minutes ago by Steve (152 rep) | Toxicity 0.10707319
I am not so knowledgeable about the US legal system, but the problem if they lose suing is that they would have to pay the legal costs, no? And lawyers are not cheap. Starting out at completely empty bank at 17 or 18 is not nice. But starting out indebted tens or hundreds of k which they would pay if losing would be quite a bit worse. — mathreadler 43 secs ago
#17582 mathreadler (129 rep) | A: How do I help my girlfriend get out of this dangerous situation with her parents? (score: 0) | posted 31 minutes ago by Steve (152 rep) | Toxicity 0.21565868 | edited 31 seconds ago by Steve (152 rep)
@mathreadler newer lawyers need to do free work from time to time. Also, no lawyer actually expects a kid to have money at that age so they'll help out if they agree to meet up in the first place. Really, you just need to ask for free help till you find someone. It helps if you're near a college. I'm sure Legal stack exchange can help with that. — Steve 21 secs ago
#17582 Steve (152 rep) | A: How do I help my girlfriend get out of this dangerous situation with her parents? (score: 0) | posted 33 minutes ago by Steve (152 rep) | Toxicity 0.06176005 | edited 1 minutes ago by Steve (152 rep)
Ok if there is exist free alternatives maybe that would be a good advice then. I had this picture that it would need to cost tens of thousands. Maybe I was wrong. — mathreadler 49 secs ago
#17582 mathreadler (129 rep) | A: How do I help my girlfriend get out of this dangerous situation with her parents? (score: 1) | posted 38 minutes ago by Steve (162 rep) | Toxicity 0.08466103 | edited 6 minutes ago by Steve (162 rep)
@mathreadler yeah, I was shocked to learn that too. It's worth double checking though. The lawyer stack exchange can probably help with that. — Steve 51 secs ago
#17582 Steve (162 rep) | A: How do I help my girlfriend get out of this dangerous situation with her parents? (score: 1) | posted 39 minutes ago by Steve (162 rep) | Toxicity 0.051696233 | edited 7 minutes ago by Steve (162 rep)
4:52 PM
#17564 cheshire (1956 rep) | A: How do I help my girlfriend get out of this dangerous situation with her parents? (score: 29) | posted 10 hours ago by YElm (1950 rep) | Toxicity 0.12810704
5:05 PM
Maybe your question is "how to help my friend accept constructive criticism and deal with nonconstructive criticism in a healthy way?" — Mykazuki 8 secs ago
#17574 Mykazuki (1063 rep) | Q: Dealing with someone who constantly believes they are being treated unfairly? (score: 4) | posted 4 hours ago by Imperator (286 rep) | Toxicity 0.15080294 | edited 2 hours ago by TheRealLester (5917 rep)
I don't think I understand your question. The title ask one thing and the body of your question ask something different. Also from what you said It seems that you are saying that if person A is nice, and B insults A, B is not being unfair to A, which is not the case, B is unfair to A. So I think I am not getting your point. Also you just don't have to take criticism, you are not supposed to let people mistreat you. Does your friend cry if someone provides criticism in a intelligent and constructive way? — Mykazuki 1 min ago
#17574 Mykazuki (1063 rep) | Q: Dealing with someone who constantly believes they are being treated unfairly? (score: 4) | posted 4 hours ago by Imperator (286 rep) | Toxicity 0.27051666 | edited 2 hours ago by TheRealLester (5917 rep)
5:20 PM
@Mykazuki I was struggling to find an apt title that encapsulates the question, and that’s a good fit. And it’s not the A-B thing, I’m saying that he says most everything not a blatant compliment as unfair criticism. And the 3rd body paragraph addresses what he does for all criticism, fair and constructive or otherwise. — Imperator 34 secs ago
#17574 Imperator (286 rep) | Q: Dealing with someone who constantly believes they are being treated unfairly? (score: 4) | posted 4 hours ago by Imperator (286 rep) | Toxicity 0.10324489 | edited 2 hours ago by TheRealLester (5917 rep)
Ah ok, that's good, just that example you gave was not actually fair treatment. But now I understand what you mean. — Mykazuki 52 secs ago
#17574 Mykazuki (1063 rep) | Q: How to help my friend accept criticism? (score: 4) | posted 4 hours ago by Imperator (286 rep) | Toxicity 0.12097275 | edited 20 seconds ago by Imperator (286 rep)
You state as a fact that she has a history of sexual abuse. I assume you did not personally witness any of the things you say here, and that you're relaying stories she's told you. Consider the possibility that she's making up stories to manipulate you. You already have characterized her parents as manipulators, so why is it so hard to think she is too? Note that I'm not rejecting the (likely) possibility that it's mostly or all true; I'm just cautioning you not to take any action based on 2nd-hand reports. Instead, get the authorities to investigate as @Belle-Sophie says in her answer. — Monty Harder 1 min ago
#17562 Monty Harder (103 rep) | Q: How do I help my girlfriend get out of this dangerous situation with her parents? (score: 17) | posted 13 hours ago by ZYR (152 rep) | Toxicity 0.3825469 | edited 12 hours ago by ZYR (152 rep)
#17574 Steve (158 rep) | Q: How to help my friend accept criticism? (score: 4) | posted 4 hours ago by Imperator (286 rep) | Toxicity 0.21829656 | edited 16 minutes ago by Imperator (286 rep)
5:58 PM
I'm going to close this question as off-topic because this goes beyond the realm of Interpersonal Skills, it will require more help than we can provide. Your girlfriend is a minor in an abusive situation, please get her help now rather than waiting until she's legally an adult. Not doing so is likely to put her in danger if she doesn't have contact with an adult with appropriate authority to help her (e.g. CPS person or lawyer). — Tinkeringbell ♦ 1 min ago
#17562 Tinkeringbell (19148 rep) | Q: How do I help my girlfriend get out of this dangerous situation with her parents? (score: 17) | posted 14 hours ago by ZYR (152 rep) | Toxicity 0.30151808 | edited 13 hours ago by ZYR (152 rep)
6:09 PM
#17551 AbraCadaver (101 rep) | A: Ask a girl whether she would like to come back to a hotel with me on a night out without being creepy (score: 9) | posted 40 hours ago by axsvl77 (776 rep) | Toxicity 0.106185235 | edited 15 hours ago by axsvl77 (776 rep)
6:26 PM
He should also be prepared for competition, including competition against folks who would act as critics. School brings together people of many different motives and dispositions, and it's impossible for administrators to manufacture a student body including only talented individuals who wish to draw out the talent of their peers rather than make themselves out to be the best---- whether through excellence or through unfair words. — elliot svensson 5 secs ago
#17579 elliot svensson (567 rep) | A: How to help my friend accept criticism? (score: 6) | posted 3 hours ago by Astralbee (16306 rep) | Toxicity 0.08785457 | edited 3 hours ago by Astralbee (16306 rep)
6:47 PM
Hi Steve, as a heads-up I've edited parts of your answer. It's fine to suggest consulting a lawyer, but please don't provide specific legal advice like saying she would win in court - this isn't necessarily true or even likely, depending on jurisdiction, how the account was set up, and other details that a qualified lawyer would be able to determine. — Em C ♦ 1 min ago
#17582 Em C (8551 rep) | A: How do I help my girlfriend get out of this dangerous situation with her parents? (score: -1) | posted 3 hours ago by Steve (158 rep) | Toxicity 0.051600095 | edited 2 minutes ago by Em C (8551 rep)
7:04 PM
Become rock star first? While you're young, or else you're back to square one with the creep factor. — Kaz 15 secs ago
#17505 Kaz (101 rep) | Q: Ask a girl whether she would like to come back to a hotel with me on a night out without being creepy (score: 41) | posted 3 days ago by Pickle (217 rep) | Toxicity 0.2629224 | edited 47 hours ago by Em C (8551 rep)
#17582 Steve (158 rep) | A: How do I help my girlfriend get out of this dangerous situation with her parents? (score: -1) | posted 3 hours ago by Steve (158 rep) | Toxicity 0.30108735 | edited 29 minutes ago by Em C (8551 rep)
7:30 PM
I'm not quite sure I follow. Do you want your students to ask you no questions at all throughout the entirety of the course? Are the certain types you're open to? What's the format of the class (online, 45 minute lectures, ...)? — Lord Farquaad 21 secs ago
#17584 Lord Farquaad (2045 rep) | Q: How to tell students to not ask questions (score: -2) | posted 2 hours ago by user74255 (69 rep) | Toxicity 0.10683077 | edited 17 minutes ago by DaveG (1354 rep)
This one isn't for clarification, I'm just confused: why would you agree to help teach a course if you didn't know anything about it? — Lord Farquaad 11 secs ago
#17584 Lord Farquaad (2045 rep) | Q: How to tell students to not ask questions (score: -2) | posted 2 hours ago by user74255 (69 rep) | Toxicity 0.061805915 | edited 18 minutes ago by DaveG (1354 rep)
Ya got me.. it is just an avatar ;) Feel free to edit in advice related to interpersonal skills (with references and explanation as to why you think it's a good idea), but please avoid speculating on legal issues - that's off-topic here and best left to an actual lawyer. — Em C ♦ 19 secs ago
#17582 Em C (8551 rep) | A: How do I help my girlfriend get out of this dangerous situation with her parents? (score: -1) | posted 3 hours ago by Steve (158 rep) | Toxicity 0.11015305 | edited 48 minutes ago by Em C (8551 rep)
#17582 Steve (158 rep) | A: How do I help my girlfriend get out of this dangerous situation with her parents? (score: -1) | posted 3 hours ago by Steve (158 rep) | Toxicity 0.1450681 | edited 49 minutes ago by Em C (8551 rep)
#17582 Em C (8551 rep) | A: How do I help my girlfriend get out of this dangerous situation with her parents? (score: -1) | posted 4 hours ago by Steve (158 rep) | Toxicity 0.0797621 | edited 58 minutes ago by Em C (8551 rep)
7:57 PM
When I was a student, if a teaching assistant had said that he is very new to the subject, I would have thought that he's going to work hard to be a little bit ahead of the students. If a teaching assistant told me not to ask questions - lots of students would have knocked on the professor's door and asked what's going on, and then the professor would have asked you what's going on. — gnasher729 9 secs ago
#17584 gnasher729 (4226 rep) | Q: How to tell students to not ask questions (score: -2) | posted 2 hours ago by user74255 (69 rep) | Toxicity 0.069915645 | edited 44 minutes ago by DaveG (1354 rep)
8:36 PM
I edited the question title to make it easier to understand what you're asking for, and if you disagree, feel free to roll it back. — ElizB 55 secs ago
#17586 ElizB (1186 rep) | Q: How can I (an introvert) convey to extroverts that I need time to rest/recover after talking? (score: 5) | posted 2 hours ago by cinnamon (26 rep) | Toxicity 0.06974477 | edited 18 minutes ago by ElizB (1186 rep)
8:51 PM
#17328 Rui F Ribeiro (884 rep) | A: How can I decline to help my teacher with their personal IT problem? (score: 3) | posted 9 days ago by jvb (131 rep) | Toxicity 0.06847318 | edited 8 days ago by jvb (131 rep)
9:28 PM
@Tinkeringbell They might be offended and not ask for help anymore. Wait... that's 100% success! — gnasher729 51 secs ago
#12226 gnasher729 (4226 rep) | Q: As a PhD student, how can I politely tell Masters students that I don't have time to help them (score: 2) | posted 144 days ago by Aaghaz Hussain (114 rep) | Toxicity 0.20864925 | edited 144 days ago by elliot svensson (565 rep)
2 hours later…
11:22 PM
Having make out with her not being drunk doesn't necessarily mean she wants to go. But she can expect you asking, for sure. — mgarciaisaia 1 min ago
#17506 mgarciaisaia (101 rep) | A: Ask a girl whether she would like to come back to a hotel with me on a night out without being creepy (score: 39) | posted 3 days ago by TheRealLester (5952 rep) | Toxicity 0.46095464
11:41 PM
When you say "didactic value", are you talking about the song's appropriateness in facilitating the members learning about music? Or are you talking about whether the song expresses an important message, such as "trees are your friends; save the trees"? — elliot svensson 1 min ago
#17577 elliot svensson (563 rep) | Q: How to convince my band members to play different songs? (score: 2) | posted 10 hours ago by Michele Ippolito (111 rep) | Toxicity 0.09920896 | edited 10 hours ago by Michele Ippolito (111 rep)
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