Your answer is horrifying.

I'm at the "tough love" phase myself, which is frustrating because this person (~40yo) still has enough time to start saving at least something.

@NajibIdrissi I'd love to hear why you think so. To give a concrete example an acquaintance approached my wife for help. They were "going to lose their rental house", but my wife took time out of her busy schedule to come up with a budget and plan for them. In three months they could be comfortable, and in two years be in pretty good shape. My wife did not give them any money. Do you know what they did? They went on a week long beach vacation. They were just looking for $$$ from us so their vacation would have been a bit nicer.

@PeteB. I find the whole mindset appalling.

@NajibIdrissi Charity is an important part of wealth building that has been backed up by secular research. You should consider it if you desire is to be wise with money.

This answer is a perfect example of why the USA is close to the worst possible country to live in, unless you are lucky enough to be rich. Before dismissing that as nonsense, you might want to consider that both infant mortality rates and overall life expectancy are higher in Cuba than in the USA!

@alephzero I disagree. Some people are lucky enough to be born rich and still make poor decisions and end up homeless. Some people are born homeless and wind up rich. Most people live above their means, expect others to support their lifestyle and wonder why they don't have money when they can't work any more. These people then blame the system for their failure.

@alephzero IMHO the USA is the best possible income to live in. The amount of income mobility available is staggering. People have a choice if they want to be wealthy, struggling or poor. Unfortunately many people choose struggling or poor.

@MichaelMcGriff you described exactly the situation that led me to post the question. My relative has an opportunity to live appropriately, save appropriately, but instead will fail at both and continue and blame others. It's frustrating to watch and I worry about what will happen. The lightbulb has to want to change.

@NajibIdrissi explaining why the answer/mindset is horrifying would be helpful, so others can potentially learn more from your perspective. I suspect there is value in both your and Pete's points of view.

@alephzero - Yep the USA is the worst place to live. 90% of the people are the top 1%ers of the world. 99.999% of the remaining 10% live better than 99% of the people in most countries. How horrid. And quit spouting those fake mortality and life expectancy statistics. In the USA we count ALL babies in our statistics not just the ones who live to a certain age. In the USA we try to save a large percentage of babies that would simply be aborted in other countries. Life expectancy may be shorter because there's segments of our population who believe killing is the proper way to handle disputes.

@alephzero: Re "...overall life expectancy ... higher in Cuba...", unfortunately that just means you have to spend longer living in Cuba. You might also inquire about immigration/emigration rates for the two countries, taking note of the fact that leaving the US means just buying a ticket, while for most of the last half-century, leaving Cuba meant making a hazardous sea voyage.

@PeteB. I lived for many years in US and I noticed that "choice" is only for the educated, healthy and knowledgeable. Everyone else lives the lives they have seen in their communities. Which is why you see so few affluent people coming from poor areas. Just count how many successful people come from the trailer parks.

@Magicsowon: People can choose to live the lives they've seen around them, or they can choose to become educated & knowledgable, and can do a lot to improve their chances of being healthy. I did, and where I came from trailers were regarded as upscale housing. If you'll bother to look, you'll find many people with similar stories.

"People have a choice if they want to be wealthy, struggling or poor. Unfortunately many people choose struggling or poor." What on Earth are you talking about? And James too. The level of privileged ignorance in this answer and in some of the comments is utterly terrifying.

@BoundaryImposition: Don't know how much I can explain in a comment (it'd really take a book - maybe an autobiography :-)), but life is a succession of choices. In school, you can pay attention & learn, or you can ignore everything and drop out as soon as you can. Later on, you can choose to spend your time partying, or save your money. You can drive an expensive gas-guzzler and be on the hook for years of payments, or you can buy a cheap economy car. You can pay $50-100/month for a fancy smart phone, or (as I do) about $7 for a basic phone.

@BoundaryImposition: A few words on your assumption of "privileged ignorance". While I'm still waiting for my privilege to show up, when it comes to ignorance, I believe the shoe might just be on the other foot. So let me ask, did you grow up in rural poverty? I did. Have you spent time as a migrant farm worker, or been homeless? I have. Have you spent 100+ hour weeks working construction? I have. So who's displaying their ignorance?

@alephzero overall life expectancy are higher in Cuba than in the USA Check your facts. en.wikipedia.org/wiki/List_of_countries_by_life_expectancy Yes, the US is only slightly ahead, but look at other statistics: en.wikipedia.org/wiki/… The US is far ahead.

FWIW, the first wiki page lists USA as ahead by WHO study, behind by UN study. It isn't clear whether there's any statistically significant different between life exp. in US and cuba.