@doppelgreener I have never healed a wound by picking at the scab. markov's point on well poisoning was not unfair

@KorvinStarmast I am not sure in what way that analogy applies here.

@doppelgreener OK, then maybe being aware of why I used that analogy would be helpful in your edit. Until you edit that question, the meta sense of that is salt being rubbed into a collective wound.

Social issues and the way they are restored are not directly analogous to the way physical wounds are treated.

Ah

Yeah, it is aggravating things because I misplaced my judgement of where the mods were at.

@doppelgreener And the "healing" utopia you aspire to is a messy thing in a mutiperson group. This isn't as simple as healing a marriage, which by itself is difficult with only two parties involved.

... I don't aspire to a utopia?

@doppelgreener I'll find a better word ... panacea? An idealized state.

What I am hoping for is to have us address various things going unsaid. And being someone who has been to various types of therapy, social, mental, and emotional issues frequently get healed specifically by addressing them and talking about them, while merely letting them sit there without talking is a great way to let them fester and get worse.

In many ways, "picking at the scab" is exactly how a problem gets resolved when it's somewhere in our heads.

I'm not going for a cure-all, I'm going for a way to shift things forward.

@doppelgreener Anyhoo, Rather than discuss with me, time perhaps better spent on the edit that folds in your dialogue with various parties. Just remember, healing/therapy for a Person is significantly different from a Group. As long as one person has an "all or nothing attitude" then there won't be healing.

I disagree with your assessment on the utility of scab picking. Let us agree to disagree.

I think your heart's in the right place.

Fair. And right now, I am not in a state to write, since I'm busy recovering from illness and my head is very much not in that space.

@doppelgreener Then it's better to wait. Good call.

Cheers, off to do a few chores. Get well soon.

@KorvinStarmast Thanks; my written word was not so much, it turned out. But on reflection, because of that frustration I mentioned I had in my post, I couldn't really see how I should've really written that until I had already posted it.

So it's a mistake I guess I'm OK with making, since it helped me get past what I needed to get past. It sucks I've been busy and sick though.

(it's not great that it was a mistake that was made, but it's one of those mistakes that is helpful)