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AIQ

02:21

@EddieKal That long question is a bit awful, but is that a valid enough reason to close?

Eddie Kal

@AIQ So I was going to have a quick word with you about that

AIQ

okay

It can be edited to remove most of the unnecessary things ... but honestly I don't want to do that

it's too long

Eddie Kal

When a moderator declines a flag, we could select a reason, but the default fast process window skips that. So I would have selected a reason just so you know that it is not a problem best handled by moderators

That question definitely could be better worded

AIQ

oh that is fine, I don't mind

oh ... that closevote reason seemed a bit strange

Eddie Kal

But it should be left to the community to close it and/or give the user some advice

I know and I understand. But we really can't just clear the current closevotes

AIQ

02:25

okay got it ... I was just internally anxious what if my lengthy questions get closed because they may be too long to someone haha

Eddie Kal

Moderators, or I, could leave a comment discussing this over with Michael Harvey, but then again, you can do that too, and apparently you have a stronger feeling about this than I do

I actually agree with you

Kentaro's question could benefit from some minor tweaks. "Too long" is not a good reason to close it, not usually

But I trust that the community also agrees, so it is unlikely to be closed as such

AIQ

yes I couldn't even get myself to read the whole thing ... damn he is something

haha learnt a new word - bug: a very strong enthusiasm for something

AIQ

03:00

@EddieKal Have you noticed that very recently, there has been a number of one-liner type of answers ...

I don't know if the questions are that bad or if the answerers don't want to do some heavy lifting

Eddie Kal

@AIQ A new user has come to my attention

And I saw your flags on some of those one-liner answers. I think Glorfindel handled your flags.

AIQ

What is this type of opposing comparison called? He is as tall as she is short.

Eddie Kal

In my understanding it is just a new user who has yet to learn the rules

M.A.R.

04:40

@EddieKal Dang, what happened?

Eddie Kal

@M.A.R. I have finally decided not to put up with userr's foul language.

I was trying to be very considerate toward userr, and for that matter ColleenV too, but I gotta say enough is enough

M.A.R.

@EddieKal Oh, should've seen the discussion was headed that way

Well, he means well, it just seems he was too frustrated with this whole thing

Eddie Kal

I didn't want to reveal the fact that userr used pretty disparaging and abusive language against another user (FumbleFingers) in their original flag

I was trying to be agreeable and work with userr and Colleen towards a solution

M.A.R.

Well, I think right now we should either move on, or have this discussion when userr can defend their position

CowperKettle

Etymology of the day: doozy - 1903 (adj.) "excellent, splendid," 1916 (n.), "an excellent of splendid thing or person," perhaps an alteration of daisy, or from popular Italian actress Eleonora Duse (1859-1924). In either case, reinforced by Duesenberg, the expensive, classy make of automobile from the 1920s-30s.

Eddie Kal

04:44

But userr's continued obscenity in this room was the last straw. I writing up an analysis on how this could have even happened.

M.A.R.

His comments were a bit out-of-line, but yeah, he's been very passionate and angry about this

Eddie Kal

userr has always been a passionate user, and I appreciate that

But this outburst of anger has shown me something deeper than a fit

M.A.R.

@EddieKal Yes, but when they're not here to defend themselves, this isn't bound to go well. You write something here now, and then they come later and respond, and the whole matter escalates spirally

We should just calm down and come back when it's less likely to say something that'll burn bridges and leave people behind

@CowperKettle Sounds like a very 1920 adjective

Eddie Kal

@M.A.R. So I actually don't see anything for userr to defend. Foul language? Calling FF stupid? Or calling everything I say or FF says BS? If you look through the discussion/argument (discussion in my wording/from my perspective) I never put anybody on the defensive.

I have always phrased my words carefully enough to be inclusive and inviting. I am always saying "our discussion" "let us discuss"

But what did I get?

For lack of a better term I am calling it bullying

I am actually writing an essay in the other room about this

in preparation for a Meta.SE post if need be

M.A.R.

@EddieKal That doesn't really matter, and I'm definitely not saying you want to stir up the pot. It's just that the simple statements involving someone else will provoke a response from them later.

Eddie Kal

04:53

Sure. If they lose the abusiveness and move on, they should head over to meta. But if I were someone who hurled insults at another user (well, I am not, I never am) and then flew into a rage because a moderator refused to act on that flag I would seriously doubt that's a good idea

M.A.R.

TBH even though userr's comments were a bit out-of-line, from afar I have the impression that mods have to deal with much worse

Eddie Kal

@M.A.R. What do you mean?

btw, again, @M.A.R. you should know that userr's actual words have not been made public and I wasn't willing even to bring that up for their sake.

M.A.R.

From my short glance at what transpired up there and what messages were removed, he wasn't right to keep calling BS and get snarky and all that. It wasn't . . . gentlemanly. But as a mod, there's gonna be harsher, ruder complaints about the most innocuous things you do or don't

Eddie Kal

So he didn't get into trouble for being rude. No, not a bit. He didn't even get into trouble for running his mouth.

M.A.R.

Well OK, he was being rude. Now that everyone will hopefully either take the flag discussion to meta or be done with it, he'll have time to cool off

Eddie Kal

04:58

I was forced to flag the last two of his comments with obscenities

M.A.R.

Sure, and now I hope we can put this behind us, because the comments really have no right to be affecting you this much

Eddie Kal

But the temporary chatroom ban was not intended by me. But since it is a side effect of the flags, I am going to say it is well deserved

M.A.R.

Maybe take a break for a few hours and do something enjoyable and come back fresh, or however you would like it. It's really not worth dwelling on it much

Auto chat bans aren't a big deal, and they're only for 30 minutes

And I'm saying this whole thing isn't and shouldn't be too big a deal; it has no right to be

He questioned your handling of flags, he wasn't being polite about it, he got stung temporarily. That's all.

Nonetheless he has brought some value to ELL, and is one of the few that care, and so have you, and so do you

Eddie Kal

@M.A.R. That I totally agree with. That is what I am puzzling over. Why? How did it come to be such a mess? Why such strong opinions, such assertiveness, such aggressiveness?

@M.A.R. userr has always been an asset

M.A.R.

Well, frustration can bring you to say something you didn't mean

And you have conveyed that you were shocked by what he said

Eddie Kal

05:04

When I post here from time to time that I can't find a certain duplicate target, userr finds a good one and votes on it

M.A.R.

He can take it or leave it, but ultimately the discussion should be done and there are quite a few more pleasant topics to talk about

Eddie Kal

But as I said very explicitly that we can't just pretend we want to be nice to new users. We can't only pay lip service to that policy while doing something totally different

M.A.R.

Speaking of pleasant, for a few months, there has been this construction site close to home so whenever I open the window to get fresh air I get my ears drilled in

Life is beautiful

Eddie Kal

experienced, old users are not above new users. period. If action should be taken, I am pushing for it. If CMs need to get involved, they better be

M.A.R.

It was just the bloody flag

Eddie Kal

05:07

I don't think I could have been clearer in my election questionnaire answers

M.A.R.

You'll handle 30k more in your modship

Eddie Kal

@M.A.R. I was thinking the same thing the entire time I was grilled by ColleenV and userr

M.A.R.

30k complaints, how quaint

AIQ

@M.A.R. Not during late hours I hope.

M.A.R.

@AIQ They're too lazy for that

There should be some law about construction after a certain hour

By that I mean there must be

There be. Damn modals

AIQ

05:09

@M.A.R. Hey, that is sometimes really painful, no? I get annoyed at all these neighbours doing the lawn every damn day

M.A.R.

You live in a house?

AIQ

doing something ... trimming it one day, cutting it the next,

M.A.R.

Flanders

I live in an apartment, and I dream about living in a two-story house with the backyard and everything.

AIQ

@M.A.R. Yes ... Well most developed countries do have laws ... can't do any kind of construction after sunset

M.A.R.

I'm also almost certain I'd dream about an apartment if I lived in a two-story house

Hmm

AIQ

05:11

But in my home country there are no laws ... so the constructions are done over night

Eddie Kal

@M.A.R. Speaking of apartments

AIQ

because that way trucks can dodge paying tolls

and taxes

Eddie Kal

I have a friend who recently returned to the U.S. after spending 15+ years in a foreign country.

She asked me about the difference between condos and apartments

Things get so annoyingly confusing

M.A.R.

@AIQ That is the best compliment Iran has been given since the Revolution

Eddie Kal

So the standard terminology now (in the U.S. at least) "apartments" are only for rent

AIQ

05:13

@EddieKal Why?

Eddie Kal

if it is a unit in a building for purchase it is called a condo

M.A.R.

@EddieKal easy: Condos are haunted

Eddie Kal

I have only become used to these terms after renting many places

@M.A.R. Then people would be forced to rent apartments from land-holding/real-estate companies

AIQ

One thing I really love about housing in my country is that no one, no one, is going to be breaking in ... We don't have houses, we have really tall buildings made of bricks, cement, rods ...

and our doors are made of solid solid wood.

no one is kicking them down

here in Canada, the houses are so easy to break in ...

I mean also in the US

I already have my dry wall dented from throwing light punches

the doors are a joke

Eddie Kal

@AIQ I feel the same way. I used to hate when somebody runs in the house the whole structure shakes. But since I have not lived in a house in a long time, I don't feel that any more.

AIQ

05:21

My roommate in the basement used to really get pissed off when I shadowboxed in the living room above

the whole house used to shake

so now I have to do it outside in the open garage

when it's dark

Eddie Kal

I don't know what that is. Shadowboxing?

AIQ

But even in a condo, don't you hear other people?

yes

Eddie Kal

@AIQ Funny you should ask that. Every freaking day

My upstairs neighbors are a bit weird. I hear footsteps 6 in the morning every day

I used to rent an apartment in a high-rise. Every day around 5 AM someone on my floor took their dog out for a walk and the dog just had to bark in the doorway. It was a studio, so the only thing between me in bed and the dog was an ordinary wood door

And it was so much fun that I couldn't wait to move out

AIQ

Damn ... I guess I can't complain about the noise then ...

@EddieKal Shadowboxing youtu.be/IMBWfrErX9U?t=196

that ain't me though

Eddie Kal

hahaha very intense stuff still

I can't do martial arts. Tried to learn taekwondo once but ended up losing an entire toe nail

AIQ

05:31

damn ...

I am going to do something reckless cause heck I am bored

AIQ

05:45

0

Q: Is there a male equivalent of "Karen"?

Is there a male equivalent of "Karen"? I have heard a few (e.g., Frank, Bob, Ken), but they don't seem to have the wide currency that "Karen" does. Perhaps they do and I am not aware of it. Definition of "Karen" from Wikipedia (emphasis mine): Karen is a term for a person perceived to be e...

lol sorry

Eddie Kal

You neglected to mention the racial aspect. Is that on purpose?

AIQ

oh I forgot to quote it

Eddie Kal

so you may already know this but this term is heavily racially charged

AIQ

yesh

Eddie Kal

I am debating whether to upvote your question. It is a great question, no doubt about it, but hmm...

AIQ

05:52

wait "heavily"?

Eddie Kal

yeah

And even more so with recent events, I mean the protests and everything

AIQ

oh jesus

Eddie Kal

So I see you've included the race part. I have upvoted it. So here is the rub:

AIQ

my departments administrator's name is Karen ... she does have a bob cut hair style.. trust me I am not making this up ... but she is very nice and helpful ...

she assigns TA duties

thanks!

Eddie Kal

The stereotypical "Karen" has appeared in many people's lives, people of color, non-white people and not in a positive way. A lot of people have had their own fair shares dealing with right-demanding, self-righteous, meddling, middle-aged white women

"Karen" is also buzzing all over Twitter lately, because there have been several incidents where a white woman, or a white couple, barges into a non-white person's life and talks them down

AIQ

05:59

Yeah I saw a video somewhere ... two older ladies in mcdonalds/kfc asking the staff to speak in english ... they were talking in spanish among themselves

I forgot where I saw that

they were asked to leave

Eddie Kal

It just so happens I was reading a news article about a Karen who, while keeping a facade of being nice, wrongfully accused a black person of vandalizing a property owned by that person.

I was just reading that article this evening.

AIQ

this happens quite a lot ... yeah ... and much more in the US

than where I am

the treatment towards brown people are a bit different, but Karen will still find us

Eddie Kal

To a lot of people, "Karen" could be a nightmare. I am not exaggerating. That is the sad truth about racism in the US (world). I am glad a lot of institutions, StackExchange included, are finally taking steps to address this. But still too little too late

And the problem is we can't get rid of Karen

As you say Karen finds a way to us no matter what

And the worst part of it all: Karens never realize what they did wrong. (I am including males here)

AIQ

This was a famous movie when I was a kid ... I watched it several times because of the pretty girls ... but seems like the name Karen gained momentum from here ... at least a bit

Eddie Kal

lol Mean Girls?

AIQ

06:06

Movie: Mean Girls

yeah

Eddie Kal

Linsey Loghan?

Not sure if I spelled her name right

But yeah it is a pretty famous movie.

AIQ

Amanda Seyfried as Karen Smith

Eddie Kal

I would venture to say 80% of American teens have seen this movie

AIQ

the one on the right ... she was and is one of the most beautiful women I ever saw ...

Eddie Kal

I believe I recently watched a movie with her in it on Netflix. Can't remember what it was.

Mamma Mia! Here We Go Again

Mamma Mia! Here We Go Again is a 2018 jukebox musical romantic comedy film written and directed by Ol Parker, from a story by Parker, Catherine Johnson, and Richard Curtis. It is a follow-up to the 2008 film Mamma Mia!, which in turn is based on the West End/Broadway musical of the same name using the music of ABBA. The film features an ensemble cast, including Dominic Cooper, Amanda Seyfried, Pierce Brosnan, Colin Firth, Stellan Skarsgård, Jeremy Irvine, Josh Dylan, Hugh Skinner, Lily James, Jessica Keenan Wynn, Alexa Davies, Christine Baranski, Julie Walters, Andy García, Meryl Streep, and Cher...

This

AIQ

06:11

@EddieKal I am trying to write up a few sentences from your comments as a motivation for my question ... thoughts?

Eddie Kal

06:38

@AIQ I don't know if what I have said would help clarify your question. I think maybe we should wait and see what responses you get from other users

AIQ

okay

@EddieKal Someone edited in the tag "american english"

:/

I believe the same person downvoted and closevoted it

which is fine but then why bother editing it

Eddie Kal

That is a British speaker, so it is understandable that they believe the question should be more clearly labeled

AIQ

so they don't use the term or slang in UK?

What about Australia?

hmmm I dunno ...

Canada? does it fall under "American-english"? the spellings however follow british english

AIQ

08:13

Aaron M Schlossberg

►

This is really, really, making me angry

ColleenV

11:27

@EddieKal I was trying to be helpful. You were the one that felt comfortable discussing it in a public chat room. If you don't want to invite opinions from the public, you should discuss it in private. That said. This is all painted in "not my problem" and I'm not going to get dragged into it any further than I already have.

CowperKettle

15:00

- I have two news for you, a bad one and a good one - which should I start with?
- Start with the good one
- There are no bad news
- And what is the bad one?
- There are no good news either.

M.A.R.

15:28

@CowperKettle Meh, moar dad puns!

AIQ

18:22

oh

Becky (slang)

Becky, a shortened version of the given name Rebecca, is a pejorative American slang term for a white woman. The term has come to be associated with a "white girl who loves Starbucks and Uggs and is clueless about racial and social issues", according to the New Statesman. In 2019 the dictionary publisher Merriam Webster wrote that Becky was "increasingly functioning as an epithet, and being used especially to refer to a white woman who is ignorant of both her privilege and her prejudice". The term Karen has a similar connotation. == Origins == In USA Today in 2016, Cara Kelly suggested that the...

In 2019 the dictionary publisher Merriam Webster wrote that Becky was "increasingly functioning as an epithet, and being used especially to refer to a white woman who is ignorant of both her privilege and her prejudice".

There is Karen, Becky, Trixie, Sharon ... for women ... For men, I can only find Chad that has some currency

CowperKettle

churl had some currency and is cognate with Carl, as far as I remember

the sound "ch" seems to denote churlishness

chad is the urban variant of churl

Churl

A churl (etymologically the same name as Charles / Carl and Old High German karal), in its earliest Old English (Anglo-Saxon) meaning, was simply "a man" or more particularly a "husband", but the word soon came to mean "a non-servile peasant", still spelled ċeorl(e), and denoting the lowest rank of freemen. According to the Oxford English Dictionary, it later came to mean the opposite of nobility and royalty, "a common person". Says Chadwick: we find that the distinction between thegn and ceorl is from the time of Aethelstan the broad line of demarcation between the classes of society. This meaning...

> In German, Kerl is used to describe a somewhat rough and common man and is no longer in use as a synonym for a common soldier

AIQ

18:38

hmm ... interesting ... but it wasn't used as a slang I guess ... I mean at the same level as Karen

Karen now has such a strong political aspect to it

M.A.R.

Everything now has a strong political aspect to it

@AIQ I guess women describe people they hate, and men come up with short things to convey long messages

Becky now sounds like a grandma

AIQ

@M.A.R. True.

@M.A.R. lol yeah could be. Doesn't seem fair though, ...

I should be more careful using these words

CowperKettle

19:05

Word of the day: decubitus ulcer

CowperKettle

19:18

Another black person was killed by policemen in the US. But why did he try to attack them with a tazer? If I knew that police might shoot me for any sign of agression, I would never attack a policeman.

M.A.R.

19:53

@CowperKettle I don't follow the news. The only thing we can hope is that Americans remember days like these while voting in November

SmokeDetector

23:59

[ SmokeDetector | MS ] Few unique characters in answer, mostly punctuation marks in answer (122): What does the phrase "absurdly" mean in this contextual setting? by Samee Ul Haq on ell.SE

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