The Heap™ – Consultancy ©®

5:44 AM

The solution that worked for me: superuser.com/a/983248/675114 — David 5 hours ago

meh

Cross-post immediate self answer in comments

All it’s missing is a cheeky Pinot

🤷🏻‍♂️

6:09 AM

@PeterVandivier Are you sure you posted the right link?

Oh! I was clicking on the Super User link

If only we had some sort of moderator alert system

If only

The meme brought me joy though

Well that's good

Michael Green

6:57 AM

@PaulWhite You mean I get to explain? At great length?? Sqweeee!

Yeah, so it's not "a horse walked into a bar" funny, but it made me grin. And it hit enough of the tropes of this audience that I thought I would share.

7:29 AM

I still don't see anything amusing there sorry

I was really hoping I had missed some subtle visual cue, or nuance

McNets

Morning

But as it stands, it looks like an arrogant person assuming the beginners are too stupid to understand whatever it was they did to speed the query up.
At the very least, the "wizard" is making no effort at all to benefit anyone except themselves.

I wouldn't want that as my CV.

I do still think I might be missing something.

7:45 AM

Like why did they have to look away?

John aka hot2use

8:30 AM

so the magic is kept a secret

He probably turned on Query Store and pinned a fast execution plan.

Nerd.

Good Morning

Seems like Query Store and AI in SQL 21019 is going to be the solution to my growing database issues I have been ranting about.

You just can't tune LIKE '%VALUE%'and if the statistics change because tables do grow, then you are basically just F * C K * D when the query execution plan changes.

What is the correct name anyway?
A) Query Plan
B) Query Execution Plan
C) Cached Query Execution Plan
D) Query Store Cached Execution Plan
E) Query Store Cached Query Execution Plan

I guess: It depends™

Q: You can accept your own answer tomorrow

8:55 AM

@Johnakahot2use Maybe. Or perhaps added an index. Who knows. Seems like a bit of a dick anyway.

I'd probably call it a Query Store Plan, but I don't think it really matters so long as the person you're talking to understands.

Master Database

9:07 AM

So I have this Q and somebody else had a nice A. Didn't exactly solve my issue, but put me on the right track. I upvoted their answer and was prompted immediately by the site to consider marking the answer as Accepted - but it wasn't the correct answer... So I went on and solved my problems. Came...

discussion

9:28 AM

seen in the close queue

| Querying needs to be as fast or faster than real-time

I saw that yesterday and wondered what "faster than real-time" could mean.

Predictive results?

probably involves blockchain somehow

and AI

oh mos def

Colin 't Hart

10:29 AM

@JackDouglas There are SQLite binaries for Linux at sqlite.org/download.html Can't you install them using eg Ansible?

Hmm, not sure if they are complete

1 hour later…

Andriy M

11:51 AM

@PaulWhite After thinking a bit more about this, perhaps the author is simply taking the mickey out of the idea that queries could become faster by magic, or the desire that an ignorant dev might have that that were the case. As in, "Oh, I don't know what else I can do. If only there were some kind of magic to make this query faster!" Intuitively this seems close to what I perceive the joke to be about, though it's still hard to deconstruct it precisely (as is often the case with jokes).

Morning

Q: Featured Text links highjacked

@AndriyM Well yes there are any number of ways a joke could work there. For example, the query could be faster due to the data being cached after the first run, but it seems unlikely the two original participants wouldn't have tried that. So, idk.

I guess I am from a time where cartoons were funny in an obvious kind of a way

Master Database

In this answer, I attempt to add a link with a "scroll-to-text" anchor https://www.postgresql.org/docs/13/release-13.html#:~:text=Allow%20ROW%20expressions%20to%20have%20their%20members%20extracted%20with%20suffix%20notation That exact link should take you about halfway down the page and display ...

bug

12:25 PM

@MasterDatabase @PaulWhite should this have gone on main meta? don't think it's a dba.se-specific issue. still appropriate to ask here, right?

@PeterVandivier bugs can be asked anywhere. I'll read it shortly

@PaulWhite no rush, i kind of figured. but then i started overthinking it

McNets

@MasterDatabase could it be related to Chrome, if you press intro again you get underlined text

ironically the link text in chat is not malformed

Andriy M

Percent-encoding

Percent-encoding, also known as URL encoding, is a method to encode information in a Uniform Resource Identifier (URI) under certain circumstances. Although it is known as URL encoding, it is, in fact, used more generally within the main Uniform Resource Identifier (URI) set, which includes both Uniform Resource Locator (URL) and Uniform Resource Name (URN). As such, it is also used in the preparation of data of the application/x-www-form-urlencoded media type, as is often used in the submission of HTML form data in HTTP requests. == Percent-encoding in a URI == === Types of URI charact...

The linked section lists ~ as one of common characters using percent encoding

Oops, sorry, I may have misread that

The actual wording is slightly different, so maybe ~ isn't (supposed to be) always encoded

bbaird

1:19 PM

My take on the cartoon is your typical devs are a bit clueless on how databases work, but really I feel like it's the job of any good DBA/database developer/"data engineer" to show others how to do things right. So I was somewhere in between @PaulWhite and @MichaelGreen in terms of appreciation.

2:16 PM

@PeterVandivier Have you noticed the link works correctly in preview? Edit your answer, and click the link in the preview window (do not submit any edit).

It will probably help the dev that looks at your issue if you update it to be clear, concise, and include all the latest information you have. I see quite a lot of extra detail floating around here and TA.

3:12 PM

@PaulWhite links to repro media added

@PeterVandivier See Heap 2.0 for more

maybe tomorrow

Quoting Josh:

> Additionally, the fragment will activate only if the document is sufficiently isolated from other pages (is the only one in its browsing context group, e.g. no window.opener or iframes).

@PeterVandivier Right-o.

I heard the sound of someone quoting me quoting the documentation.

That was a particularly fun aspect

@JoshDarnell Do you think we (i.e. you) have enough info to usefully answer the meta q?

3:52 PM

@PaulWhite Sure, I can post something. It really warrants an answer from SE staff though, as fixing the URL encoding issue is the only fix.

@JoshDarnell Don't worry if you don't think it's worth it. I thought the SE dev tasked with the bug might find it useful.

I could write something, but I really have no idea what I'm talking about in that area.

If anyone asked me a question about it...well.

Still, I will attempt something if needed.

No worries, I'm writing something up now!

neato

4:42 PM

Got sidetracked by work work. Answer posted now.