The DMZ

@AviD Step (1): Ping Manish. Step (2): Give cookies. Step (3) Receive unban

You're nobody

@MarkBuffalo Less talking, more reading.

you're old enough and slow enough that the difference is academic

I wonder, can another mod edit a mod's name? For example, can @RoryAlsop change @AviD's name to "Avi 'Buzz Killington' D"?

@Simon The doughnut is literally eccentric: by definition, its centre is missing.

"UN secretary for cryptography" has a nice ring to it.

@RoryAlsop good grief, I think that man should ask for a full refund of his StackExchange subscription!

@MarkBuffalo kinky

DEATH TO ALL CROSS-POSTERS!

@RоryMcCune My favourite tweet from yesterday: I fell downstairs with my guitar; accidentally wrote a 1 Direction song.

@Simon Body is 98% water -> jellyfish. Body is 98% whisky -> Scottish.

@Polynomial Other than porn, I don't think I can achieve anything else.

@nobody It always starts with a feeling that everything is fucked. Then you start learning and begin to feel like you're getting a grasp of it. Finally you know enough to know how little you (and others!) know, and you begin having the feeling that everything is fucked, again.

passweird.com <-- @Simon new Password generator for you

I can't even be bothered to scroll back that far. I'll assume I missed nothing and continue as usual

MAY YOUR PASSWORDS ALWAYS BE HASHED WITH MD5

Boulevard of broken TLS implementations

this is the internet, we think bears created crypto, see weird scottish man with a mask as our leader, admire a cartoon tigre figure and talk random shit about every possible thing including transgender muslims, ponies, unicorns and oversexed canadians who fap to hardcore DJs (not calling names here).

"Yes, we looked at your profile and also the transcript of the DMZ. You seem to have very...unorthodox views regarding the Jews. I assume it is clear we cannot hire you."

Gaaaawd damn it! Every time I start doing something it becomes uncool.

My absolute favourite bad advice that sounds like really good advice is "Write security critical code yourself. You can't trust those third-party libraries anyways"

mourner.github.io/bullshit.js

The trees never sleep, they merely wait

welcome to the DMZ, moral standards are on the other side of the firewall

that's it, I'm setting DMZ transcripts as my source of entropy

For whom it may interest: SHA-3 has been selected, and is the Keccak function.

If you demand a bug bounty with a threat of legal action after submitting a report, are you still a white hat?

@raz That thing is huge.

Incompetence is the most common skill everywhere.

Not many people actually perform a test in a legit laboratory to answer a question on SE.

feature-request If a question contains the word “heartbleed”, automatically close it as a duplicate of security.stackexchange.com/questions/55083/…

@Ohnana It's completely YOLO crypto. It isn't worth trying to fix.

o

@J.J HBD, but for us you'll always be 17

it's like when I was learning pointers in C: I used &varname or *varname or varname or varname[] until the compiler stopped complaining...

No, it isn't. There's a few tasks needing to be completed, and they're right up my ass

on the upside, its women only, so I'm going to have 15 women kicking me in the nuts while I writhe around on the ground.

5.4 million is "some accounts"

Simon is a contraceptive

it WAS a fucking sex toy!!!

It's ok, it's as if I enjoy the abuse now; some sort of Stockholm syndrome.

dear lord save us all, @Lighty is fixing posts for grammar and spelling