Beta Reviewers/Reviewing

I was keeping it alive before but I got lazy. The main room has been quiet enough that I wouldn't mind people posting in there. I would also expect that a moderator would help you unfreeze this room if you flagged.

@MartinSleziak I don't think that needs to be posted every time the chat's about to freeze, but thanks.

"The day I stand at my grave as my father fakely cries..." Fakely threw me off here. I would consider a better word. You could try rewriting it to "The day I stand at my grave as my father cries fake tears of pity..." or something like that.

I see no need for the dash in the above sentence. Are you trying to convey trailing off in thought? If so, I would prefer using "..."

"They said the hero always wins." What tense are you using? Did you mean "They say the hero always wins"? Did they ever stop saying that - meaning you wrote "said" instead of "say"? Or was this intentional?

If you need a beta reviewer, please post a link to the story on a site where there is a chat or review or message function so a beta reviewer can submit feedback. fictionpress.com is a good option, google docs with access via link and suggestion mode for everyone will also work.