Starred posts | chat.stackexchange.com

doppelgreener

Nov 15, 2021 00:20

I really like that this room's name lets me post dragon emojis to keep the room from getting frozen and that just makes perfect diegetic sense

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Thomas Markov

Sep 7, 2021 16:40

I formally submit my request to the universe that the issues keeping Rubiksmoose from us be resolved favorably.

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doppelgreener

Mar 31, 2022 15:35

Gentle reminder that Here There Be Dragons is intended as a meeting room for opt-in conversations & is not an additional casual side chat. Please help us keep Dragons tidy so it can be used for the purposes that need it.

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Carcer

Feb 26, 2022 10:23

@vicky_molokh-unsilenceMonica I hope you are okay over there

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BESW

Feb 18, 2022 12:46

Y'all is a beautiful word, second only to all y'all.

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doppelgreener

Sep 4, 2021 15:46

Here's some merch by queer people about queerness:
https://www.biancadesigns.co/ queer latinx artist selling pins, caps, t-shirts...
https://www.etsy.com/shop/megemiko trans and queer designs including some ally designs
https://gayprideapparel.com/
https://www.etsy.com/shop/VerdantSuccubus does some queer angel pins which are just amazing
https://www.biancadesigns.co/

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NautArch

Nov 3, 2020 13:51

If US politics do end up being discussed here, please keep in mind that there may be different viewpoints and to treat everyone with respect regardless of disagreements.

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Sciborg

Nov 4, 2021 00:31

I'm grateful to our resident mods as always, you do wonderful work <3

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BESW

Mar 16, 2022 21:37

I have found that when I’m lucky enough to have access to a conversation about something I have no experience with, I learn the most by listening attentively and asking questions later when it’s over.

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Andras Deak -- Слава Україні

Mar 10, 2022 20:17

Not sure how widely known (or relevant) it is, but there's an itch.io game bundle for Ukraine that includes 900+ games, 300+ of which are physical books (lot of them RPGs). Open for another week.

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BESW

Nov 3, 2020 13:55

[gestures above] That. And let's be real clear: "respect" doesn't mean that people get to say whatever they want without consequences. Dehumanizing people is not respectful and cannot be respected.

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doppelgreener

May 25, 2021 21:40

we're not doing a vent about neopronouns

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kviiri

May 4, 2021 10:18

Apologies or not, forgiven or not, online spaces require energy and at worst, are stressful or even dangerous to those participating. We cannot expect others' participation in them even under the best of circumstances, and certainly not in circumstances where the attitudes present are adversarial in spirit.

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bobble

Apr 19, 2021 05:01

I use "genderqueer" to mean "it's complicated"

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Thomas Markov

Feb 18, 2022 17:58

@V2Blast "Am I eating enough garlic bread?"

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BESW

Jul 4, 2021 23:11

Think of him as the Edison of RPGs.

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doppelgreener

Dec 17, 2020 20:18

In case it gets glossed over I'd emphasize that consulting with the impacted parties is a necessity in this process. The community will run into trouble if they're not consulted, or worse, consulted but ignored, because the majority will be less equipped to recognise the shape of the problem and the appropriate actions to take.

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Carcer

Jun 8, 2021 19:36

for some people the experience of gender is important to them, and how they are gendered by others matters. For some people the experience of gender is not important and they don't care about it at all. The thing is that gender is a subjective experience and you can acknowledge that it is important for some people without that automatically meaning it is a big deal for everyone.

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doppelgreener

May 24, 2021 10:07

Gentle reminder that Here There Be Dragons is not an additional available casual side chat, but instead a meeting room designated for opt-in conversations. These tend to be conversations about serious topics that are making some people uncomfortable or otherwise genuinely need their own space. Conversations that don't need this space, or have moved past the point of needing it, can/should be moved elsewhere to ensure the space becomes available again.

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NautArch

Nov 4, 2020 17:59

I really just want the gov't to function normally again. For the president to lose the power they have gotten and for things to return to function.

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G. Moylan

May 19, 2021 14:32

All the D&D hostility lately is really starting to piss me off. let people like things.

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doppelgreener

May 6, 2021 09:43

Incidentally, because it's pertinent, if someone does misgender another person, the best thing you can do is politely correct them and then allow the conversation to move on (and ensure it does). One of the worst things you can do is drag someone through the mud over it, since it engenders hostility and fear around pronouns which gets directed towards trans people.

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linksassin

Nov 11, 2021 02:05

@Trish Please stop calling meta toxic because other user's disagreed with you. There are many good users there trying to do their best for the site. Accusations of harassment are not ok, hence the comments were removed as soon as moderators became aware of it.

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hyper-neutrino

Nov 3, 2021 23:27

There's a difference between someone talking about their personal experiences, which mind you nobody asked them to stop, and someone nitpicking, telling someone their experiences are invalid, and making generalizations and name-calling, which by the way, multiple people have asked you to stop doing, and the next time will not be "asking".

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BESW

Jun 12, 2022 11:13

Then you are mini golfer.

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doppelgreener

Dec 17, 2020 20:12

I think it is important for our community to look out for when a question is exploring a minority's perspective and difficulties, and when it is, to ask the question "is this minority perspective being validated in answers, or is it being talked down over by the majority?".
Further, check the frame challenges: are they starting out from the premise that the minority perspective is valid, or is the frame challenge that the minority perspective itself is wrong and invalid?
If the minority is not allowed to be an authority on their own perspective, we are probably seeing a toxic space that nee…

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BESW

Mar 28, 2022 14:57

I'm 73 in Q&A years. Chat is my retirement condo.

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BESW

Mar 28, 2022 13:57

The comments and answers by ASR and Markov about academic journals are probably spot-on about the motive of the original edits. There's a (increasingly discredited but not extinguished) mode of thought in academic spaces that removing any trace of the scholar's identity from the work is a form of erasing bias.

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BESW

Mar 28, 2022 13:38

Regarding "you" in answers, particularly, here is some learning I shared a long time ago the general principles of which I still (mostly) stand by:

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kviiri

Nov 4, 2020 20:14

The whole system is in a dire need of reform

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BESW

Mar 16, 2022 21:54

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doppelgreener

Mar 16, 2022 13:46

If anyone's got genuine questions about trans stuff and issues in the vicinity, I offer that you can ping me with them here and I'll respond with what I know.

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AncientSwordRage

Mar 16, 2022 00:55

Something I'd note, is that a lot of the time when people assume something is 'not harmful' its because they're used it it. Just because you weren't initially aware of harm doesn't mean it's not always been harmful to somebody

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BESW

Mar 16, 2022 00:31

I don't know what you mean by 'woke culture.' So far as I can tell it's a term that's used to describe almost anything that seems inclusive or compassionate, to label that compassion as performative and false.

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Rubiksmoose

Oct 15, 2020 15:13

This is our new room for opt-in conversations. Not A Bar has transitioned fully into what it was evolving into: a place for off-topic, pleasant conversations that don't belong or aren't preferred in the main chat. This room is for conversations that don't belong in the main chat for other reasons and will be opt-in only.

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doppelgreener

Jun 8, 2021 19:51

Trans rights is a huge deal. It's a huge deal because trans people are just trying to live their lives, but we're being murdered in the streets and facing people working to remove our access to medication. Respect of peoples' pronouns is a huge deal because trans people want respect extended to them, and the same respect everyone else gets to have.

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G. Moylan

Jun 3, 2021 22:15

@A.B. use the pronouns people ask you to use, full stop. It doesn't matter what our individual opinions about their validity, etc. are. If someone says in good faith "this is how you can show me basic respect," then do it. The end.

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NautArch

Feb 18, 2022 14:25

For me, it's not about making a mistake. Mistakes happen. It's what you do after the mistake has been pointed out that matters.

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Journeyman Geek

Dec 23, 2021 00:45

WHY BRAIN

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BESW

Dec 14, 2020 15:05

Okay, let's be real clear. @RevenantBacon You need to back down. You're bringing a dictionary to a discussion on experience and you've been told it's not welcome here. It's presumptive, condescending, and you need to stop now and walk away for a while.

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Rubiksmoose

Sep 7, 2021 16:58

Perhaps this would help guide this discussion a bit more productively: does it help to know that the mod team talked with CMs and have already scheduled an election for RPG?

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BESW

Sep 7, 2021 12:35

What we can do, again, is describe problems we see. We can't even know, in many cases, if those problems are moderator-originated. Give our views of the community's functioning so that the moderators and CMs can make more informed choices by incorporating our experiences into theirs.

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Bardic Wizard

Nov 7, 2020 18:50

Did people see the news? The US election has been called for Biden

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doppelgreener

Sep 3, 2021 11:42

When I run into LGBT-phobia in a community, whether I have stayed or moved on has depended on something specific: whether the power structure that needs to do something about it can have my back and protect me or not. If I'm in a community where I don't believe the forces of protection can or will protect me, have my back, and take my side against attacks, I leave. If they will do those things, I stay.

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Carcer

Oct 30, 2020 20:35

@RevenantBacon no, you don't get to demand that someone continues conversing with you after they've realised it will be an unproductive conversation

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bobble

Aug 19, 2021 02:18

It makes perfect, logical scientific sense but she's my grandma.

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Rubiksmoose

Oct 16, 2020 21:07

I don't believe it is fair or polite to just universally claim that every person who disagrees with you on this topic is wrong. You are free to have your opinion of course, but this line of discourse is not productive.

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Someone_Evil

Jun 24, 2021 19:36

Then also the room context, which is what most of the outside chat (including above) relates to, CvCZ was created as a specialized containment room (you may note that the current room is also that, albeit not specialized) for RPG. It's partially served that, but also played host to a touch more. Generally not a problem, unless it starts needing moderation which isn't present, which is where my perspective of needing to close it comes in

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kviiri

Jun 9, 2021 06:15

No more picking fights on pronouns, neo or otherwise.

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doppelgreener

Jun 8, 2021 19:26

Pointedly avoiding peoples' pronouns is pretty harmful, in the same way misgendering a person is.

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