last day (23 days later) » 

9:57 PM
2
Q: Birthday celebration in bad environment

kifliIn my job people are used to bring sweets on their birthday. But they are really bad mannered and distant to me and newer invite me. This sunday it was my birthday and I just passed to bring anything. I am incapable of putting a good face to people that are not nice to me and I think it will look...

 
What do you mean by inviting? Don't people drop whatever they bring in the break room? And how do they even know it was your birthday? You didn't tell them, did you...?
 
By inviting I mean inviting by mail or personally. No. I am not sure. Provably you can see it somewhere. I got corporal happy birthday mail. My team mate have seen it and congregated me also my boss congratulated me so they definitely have access to this info. Some one could hear it as we are sitting really close to each other.
why all this close votes? could someone provide a reason.
 
This sounds like a symptom of a more general problem. Have you made yourself someone they want to share their birthday with, or are you one of the grumpy folks they'd just as soon not have a visit from? If you dislike everyone who is not nice to you, people have no reason to be nice to you. Fix your attitude; if you want friends, try behaving like a friend. You are creating your own "bad environment".
 
@keshlam sorry it is not the case. they are actually very cold and bad mannered people. They ignored me since day 0. If people don't answer to greats and do like you dont exist for mounts this can only mean that they are this way.
 
I'm sorry, but if you have had this attitude from day zero I can't blame them. If you want it to change, the only thing you can change is yourself. Unless you want to change your employer... But I think you will bring the problem with you if you do. Sorry, but the way you make folks treat you nicely is to treat them nicely until they notice; nothing else works.
 
9:58 PM
I voted to close because your situation is unclear to me (and your attitude doesn't help). Either people drop food in the breakroom for the entire department/office or they've got it in their own office/table and invite people to come grab a cupcake or whatever. If you say that it's not in the breakroom and that you haven't been invited by anyone, then there shouldn't be anyone feeling annoyed that you didn't bring anything in. If you have been invited by some (but not all), then those colleagues who did invite you (presumably the ones in close proximity?) are right to be annoyed with you.
 
@keshlam Sorry but it is exactly what I am doing as I said they are the problem. I worked here for mounts I know how people here are there are no mistake. Some people want actually nice environment some others are just like a wall of bricks to any one new.
 
You missed uneducated. Cold, bad mannered, and uneducated. You showed them by not bringing treats. What did you hope to accomplish by not bring treats? They are the problem? Not bringing treats was a sign of good will?
 
@Lilienthal no I never said that. It is in the break room but they bring the goodies and invite some people to join in rest stay away. The comments comes from people that are distant not close but you are right that why I am asking if I did wrong.
 
@kifli I really don't follow your line of thinking here. What stopped you from doing the same thing?
 
@Paparazzi sight of good will to who ? may be there are people who don't want to be friendly, don't like me or just don't care about making friends. how it make feel people who are hostile to me ? also good will to who ? there are 500 people working I cant invite all I cant invite few. I cant invite all people who get along with me each day or I got along because reasons I posted.
 
9:58 PM
You are such a victim. I don't know make it. Somehow other people seem to bring treats and get along. Based on your comments you are difficult negative person.
 
@Paparazzi how positive -.-". I don't know they do they don't. As I said they are cold and bad mannered. There is a lot of people who get silence treatment for absolutely no reason. If being nice doesn't work maybe being like them do. It what they seems to want after all.
 
Just say you had Forget it. Don't enter on theirs game.
 
Seeing people as "cold" and "bad mannered" is often a cultural problem. Are you in your native country among native people? It is very, very easy to misunderstand things if there are cultural differences. And people will be careful around someone from a different culture, which again can be interpreted as "cold" and "bad mannered".
 
wow I cannot follow this comment stream AT ALL.
 
@Paparazzi I think the OP said the nice people were the uneducated ones.
 

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