The Overlook Hotel

2:06 PM

@Arrowfar Hello!

user116848

2:17 PM

@NeilFein Hey :-) How are you?

2:34 PM

Well, thanks, You?

user116848

I am fine, thanks!

Hi.

user116848

@KitFox howdy!

holla

hey

2:47 PM

how are you?

user116848

I am fine. You? How is it going?

I am back to working on requirements for this project that is continually delayed by other projects.

What are you up to?

user116848

You know, same old same old :-)

user116848

Nothing new :p

user116848

Hey did you read a starred message in ELU chat?

2:55 PM

What's the old? I don't think I know what you do.

@Arrowfar No.

Well, nothing recently.

I can't see the star wall unless I enter the room.

user116848

@KitFox I am studying accountancy. So I am home these days to prepare for exams that are in December

Ah. That's pretty intense.

user116848

Yes, that is. Very

user116848

And very difficult too :(

I can imagine.

How many exams do you need to take?

user116848

2:57 PM

I am doing ACCA. It has 14 papers.

user116848

I have cleared 10 so far.

Oh, that's very good.

user116848

But it is not like CPA. CPA is high level.

user116848

in English Language & Usage, Sep 19 at 19:40, by RegDwigнt

In other news, Kit is back. Hooray!

user116848

It has 4 stars! lol

3:00 PM

Huh.

user116848

So I guess nothing wrong with coming back to ELU chat, huh?

I'm not going back.

user116848

Why?

I rotate the message occasionally and that's it.

user116848

I see. So you are like 'done' with chatting there?

3:02 PM

Because I have better things to do with my time than be trolled.

user116848

Who was particularly 'trolling' you? I didn't notice I guess.

user116848

If it's okay to ask

user116848

:-)

Rob, Cerb, Skully, Jez, Saladin, etc.

user116848

No way! That many!

3:03 PM

Well, it depends.

On whether your expectation is for a mod to sit and watch people be shitty to other people.

I got tired of it.

user116848

Yes. But you can always ignore them I guess. But it's your call.

The general consensus was that I should have kept my mouth shut since no one else was complaining.

user116848

I see.

So fine. They can have their room and I don't need to participate.

user116848

So what did you say?

3:05 PM

I have nothing more to say about it.

I mean that the only people who spoke up after I spoke up felt the need to tell me that I was abusing my power as moderator and that my expectation of authority was incorrect. In short, that I shouldn't speak, because I was a moderator.

user116848

Yes, I got the meaning after writing it :-)

user116848

"Duh" me

user116848

:p

user116848

I see

I find the claim patently absurd. But no one else expressed any interest in having me continue enforcing my idea of civility, so I decided that I didn't need to be there.

I was investing too much bandwidth in it.

user116848

3:14 PM

But, there is still 'civility' there. Yes, occasionally someone says something etc. other than that it is fine.

It's the occasionally. I should be able to speak up when I object to something. Anyone should feel comfortable doing that.

user116848

But you are right, there is always something better that one can do with the time.

Hello @KitFox! Long time no see.

Hello, @Will.

What happened to your Meta question?

Well, the one about you.

You must watch the new movie "If I stay". I cried throughout the movie.

@KitFox We deleted it as it did not really belong to meta.

3:28 PM

Oh.

I just got something to learn French, German and LaTeX properly. Let me show you.

amazon.com/Living-Language-French-Complete-coursebooks/dp/…

amazon.com/Living-Language-German-Complete-coursebooks/dp/…

amazon.com/Guide-LaTeX-4th-Helmut-Kopka/dp/0321173856

And I thought I would just get some ESL too, since the series is excellent.

amazon.com/Living-Language-English-Complete-ESL/dp/0307972348

3:49 PM

That's a lot of one-boxes.

4:30 PM

Are we having writing exercise today?

Yes, in a little while. Are you joining in?

Sure. Can't sleep anyway.

So today I went for my first psychotherapy session. I am not sure if it would help, so I will decide whether to go for a second session.

Maybe I should try three sessions or so to see if it works.

Three sessions seems reasonable.

The success of therapy will depend a lot on your therapist's ability to establish a rapport with you.

But I have half a mind now to stop all appointments and all meds. I think sorting out my thoughts myself is the best way to go...

It's almost as hard to find a good therapist as it is to find a good relationship.

4:34 PM

Aha. Hey today I earned 60 SGD for doing 2 surveys!

Haha, I was waiting for my appointment when they came up to me to ask me.

But you should be able to figure out if you have a good groove with your therapist in three sessions. If you don't, do you have the option of trying someone else?

@WillHunting Nice!

@KitFox I think I can switch if I really want to. We will see.

I think you should keep looking for a therapist if this one doesn't work out.

It's hard to say if therapy will help if you don't find a helpful therapist.

I went through five or six over about seven years before I found a good match.

I see.

Well, that's not true. I had one other pretty OK therapist. About number three sometime a year or so after I started looking for help.

4:38 PM

I just cannot get past the idea that only I can help myself.

Well, that's true, but a therapist helps give you the tools to help yourself.

You sound like you are motivated and have self-awareness, which makes you a good candidate for therapy.

You want to get better and a therapist can help you figure out how to do that.

OK. Anyway the two people who did the surveys with me were girls. But neither was Maria, lol.

Did they smile at you?

They smile at everyone.

Very professional.

But did they smile at you?

I like when pretty girls smile at me, even if they smile at everybody.

4:41 PM

Not in any special way.

I am thinking of emailing L one last time this Dec, and if there is still no reply I will forget her forever.

I think my email is pretty harmless, so I don't think it will frighten her or anything like that.

What are you hoping to accomplish with the email?

Well, I am hoping to keep in touch with her so that one day I might have a chance, something like that. I know the whole idea is pretty vague and silly.

So you're hoping she will write back to you in a friendly way?

Yes, and somehow one day I might have a date with her when she has broken up with her bf...

What if you get no response?

4:47 PM

Then I will forget her. So far I have sent her only 2 emails over the last 3 years or so.

What if she sends you a friendly response?

Then I will take it from there. See what the response says and act accordingly.

Let me share with you the 16 books I hope to finish before entering grad school...

And if she's angry?

in Mathematics, 24 mins ago, by Will Hunting

Marsden and Weinstein: Calculus I, Calculus II, Calculus III
Cohn: Classic Algebra, Basic Algebra, Further Algebra
Rudin: Mathematical Analysis, Real and Complex Analysis, Functional Analysis
Lee: Topological Manifolds, Smooth Manifolds, Riemannian Manifolds
Kopka and Daly: Guide to LaTeX
Living Language English Complete Edition
Living Language French Complete Edition
Living Language German Complete Edition

That's a lot of textbooks.

4:50 PM

@KitFox Then I will forget her and never email her again. 3 emails is the so-called max.

OK. Sounds like you've got it planned out.

@KitFox I need to have a head start to make up for lost time.

I don't know L in person, but to my silly self, she seems to be the best girl I have ever met.

Her boyfriend A is a very lucky man, lol.

user116848

I used to like a girl too. But she fell for someone else.

Did she fall to her left or to her right?

I have liked many girls.

user116848

4:55 PM

haha lol :D

Me too, I think maybe about 10.

Only one enough to marry, but luckily I didn't.

user116848

I liked many too. But she was the one I met with face to face many times, you know.

Turns out, she wasn't what she seemed.

Hmm, I can't marry a man even if I wanted to here, but I am not really into men, lol.

4:56 PM

It's only recently legal here.

user116848

Me neither. I am totally into girls.

Anyway, it turns out that S is very different from what I first thought.

user116848

Who is S?

That's my secret with Ms Fox.

user116848

ha :-) okay

user116848

4:58 PM

np

Shall we give a letter to your girl as well?

user116848

No, no need. I am good :D

user116848

You go ahead. I am listening too :-)

user116848

Sorry I barged in on your conversation here :)

Well, I think L really looks a lot like Justin Bieber.

5:00 PM

hahahahaha

user116848

LOL

user116848

So you like Justin Beiber looking girls?

btw, I have a meeting now, so I can't do chat for a while. You guys can start without me if you want.

user116848

lol

@Arrowfar Yes.

OK.

user116848

5:01 PM

@WillHunting That's new for me :D

user116848

Well, I hope you find someone best!

I have not met L in person, but I think of L all the time the past 3 years or so.

It's silly because I might not even move to where L is, or L might be married already.

user116848

Oh, no! That looks sad.

Oh L is in the US.

Anyway I think she has been with her bf A for many many years...

user116848

So, did she like you before?

5:04 PM

No, I am nothing to her. It's all my obsessions with her only.

user116848

Before meeting with this new guy?

user116848

I see

Basically I just chatted with L a few times in the SE chat, lol.

user116848

So, who knows may be she likes you too. No?

And then I sent her 2 emails so far but there was no reply.

user116848

5:04 PM

@WillHunting Oh, from here lol

@Arrowfar Yes, L and S are both in the US and both from SE, lol.

user116848

@WillHunting haha I see :-)

But I don't feel anything for S anymore.

S is not really my type, I learnt.

user116848

Do they come to ELU chat? Maybe I have noticed them too. Maybe.

L and S have not come to SE chat or even SE for a long, long time, lol.

user116848

5:07 PM

But liking someone from SE is a long shot, unless we live in the US you know.

Yes. I hope I find someone when I go there.

user116848

But maybe you could get lucky! lol

I hope I am not too old to find someone.

user116848

Well, I hope you get lucky with her.

Today I woke up at 8 am. It's 1 am now and I still don't feel tired, lol. I wonder why.

Maybe I am too excited that I finally finalised my reading list after so many years, lol.

user116848

5:10 PM

Yes, it happens.

user116848

That's a good thing.

I intend to get well by the end of 2015, take the GRE in 2016 and enter grad school in 2017.

user116848

Sounds like a good plan!

user116848

Yay!

I have already delayed my plans for many years because I was too mentally unstable.

But recently I feel I am getting back some control.

Oh I also hope to get married by 2021, which is when I turn 40, lol.

user116848

5:14 PM

:-)

user116848

Yes, it also depends upon the person. If he gets his thoughts sorted out, he can get better very soon.

Are you troubled by anything?

user116848

you mean generally?

Anything at all.

user116848

Yes, I have a sorta 'nervousness' issues. Like 'anxiety'

user116848

5:17 PM

I mean people say that.

Yes, anxiety is the word.

user116848

I know.

So you are taking ACCA?

user116848

Yes, I am.

How about CFA?

user116848

5:18 PM

Yes, that is very good too

You will get rich quickly.

For me, I am only interested in math.

user116848

With ACCA? I doubt it.

I am also interested in girls, lol.

user116848

Because ACCA's are not very highly paid in Pakistan.

user116848

I am not rich. Just average :)

user116848

5:25 PM

Maybe poor.

user116848

Like 'ends meet' kinda thing.

user116848

:)

user116848

I'll be back. . .

@WillHunting Money is just math and has nothing to do with privilege, family, or luck.

</rant>

6:07 PM

So stuff and things.

no writing exercise today?

I will go to bed in 15 min.

@KitFox - The baby's down for a nap so I have some time.

@NeilFein Oh. There should be.

My baby's not made yet.

6:20 PM

I don't have time right now, but you can do it.

Here's a topic: cheese crackers.

Go!

I'm bringing stuff to the curb, but I'll be back in a bit. Can you do 3pm EST?

Oh, okay, I'll do it now.

I am going to sleep. You carry on writing.

Writing

Time's up!

Just finished.

The cheese was sharp and salty as I bit down. The cracker crumbled down my chin, a few crumbs getting caught on my shirt. A few crumbs fell onto the vinyl upholstery of the restaurant chair.

The cheese and cracker sandwich was delicious, and I had eaten the very last one. I felt terribly guilty at finishing the snack plate all by myself. Soon, my friend would be back from the bathroom. She'd see the empty plate we had ordered and wonder. I was already feeling embarrassment in advance.

The waitress took a step towards the table, and I knew she'd offer to take the plate away. She might even…

Maybe we could keep a meta thread of writing exercises, not week by week but just one master thread?

That way when a week has no writing exercise it doesn't seem like a failure.

6:36 PM

If we had a blog, we could assemble them into it.

I feel such doom right now.

Q: Chatroom writing exercises - log

@KitFox - I edited my older thread that was for a specific date.

0

A place to link to writing exercise chats. One answer per chat session should work well, rather than having a new thread every week.

user116848

7:04 PM

hi

user116848

So no one else is writing?

@Arrowfar Have you written?

You could do my topic if you want.

user116848

Which is?

user116848

I don't like the 'cheese crackers' topic

user116848

:)

7:08 PM

How about "beer pretzels"?

Or just "food"?

user116848

@NeilFein BTW here are my previous stories---> arrowfar.wordpress.com

These are all from chats here?

user116848

Yes, I pasted them in Wordpress.

Cool

user116848

From the last three sessions

7:14 PM

Hey! You don't get to "not like it".

user116848

haha. Hey!

Write it into something you do like then.

user116848

Okay, I am thinking about what to write in "cheese crackers" topic

No thinking! Just writing!

user116848

Give me some time...

user116848

7:15 PM

I want to think :-)

I think maybe we need to go over the rules of the lightning write.

user116848

okay so it might look shabby. That ok?

The whole point is to write about a random topic for ten minutes without having time to consider it beforehand.

user116848

okay, then I'll start offhand

It's supposed to be crap, and also get you to learn to put things on paper without hesitation and interference from your internal critic.

user116848

7:16 PM

Let me set up my wordpress page....

You can worry about all that later. Just open a text editor and go!

We can do more structured writing exercises from week-to-week if you want. We used to do that a long time ago.

user116848

Okay. I am ready!

Go!

user116848

You ready?!

user116848

7:30 PM

@NeilFein, @KitFox Cheese crackers

Well done!

user116848

Well, I couldn't think of something better :-)

hahaha That was funny.

user116848

Not much time I guess :)

user116848

thanks!

7:32 PM

I want a tee shirt that says this. I'll wear it to a wine tasting.

user116848

:D

8:02 PM

@MATT!

hi

Go write!

taco pants!

user116848

8:14 PM

@KitFox When are you writing yours?

Later.

user116848

Mine was in okay format, right?

user116848

I mean font etc.

Yours was fine. I think you're getting the hang of it.

user116848

Yes, Wordpress looks neat and clean

user116848

8:16 PM

Matt didn't complete his. I think he is busy.

user116848

It has been more than 10 mins since you said Go! :-)

cheese crackers

I didn't start when Kit said go

not that it matters

Of course it matters.

You're supposed to always do the things I say when I want you to do them.

@MattЭллен Aww, that's sweet.

thanks :)

@KitFox right, sorry :p

user116848

Yes, damp crackers are never nice:-)

user116848

8:24 PM

Unless we damp them in tea :)

user116848

Good one! matty