Thanks for the answer! (I upvoted it) However, I still don't understand why I shouldn't mention that I believe they are on the spectrum? What's the problem with that? — Noon 35 secs ago

I can recognize myself with the over-stress part. I thought that not explaining my non-involvment to my friend could alter in a bad way our friendship, but it's probably what my self-made moral makes me believe. I'll let them discuss it themselves, and just notify (if it seems necessary) to my friend that I haven't had a chance to express myself. — faflo10 53 secs ago

(I think a clarification is in order - but I definitely agree with the general assessment that OP should not attempt to diagnose others and especially with a communication disorder over the internet) — Benjamin Gruenbaum 38 secs ago

I'm not sure I agree about the "professional diagnosis" part. After talking with a therapist this shocked me a little. ASD is diagnosed a lot more in children than adults and the CDC focuses on that. Professional diagnosis for adults (like the ADI-R) is usually just a questionnaire and interview that checks things like eye contact. The goal of a diagnosis is (at the end of the day) to figure out how to give patients better care, coping tools and dealing mechanisms. — Benjamin Gruenbaum 2 mins ago

@Evargalo - Not necessarily. "living with an SO of 10+ years" means they've been involved for 10+ years, but they might have just moved in last week. "Living with an SO for 10+ years" means they've been living together that long, but they may have been involved for many years before moving in together. They are not equivalent statements. — Dave Sherohman 1 min ago

It might be the total opposite : both parties feel less "important" and hence that they should yield to the other. The end result is the same though. — breversa 52 secs ago

I disagree. Learning that I have ASD helped me to realize that it wasn't my fault that I grew up as a strange person with almost no friends, that struggle to interact socially. There's was nothing in the past that I could have done differently that would fix me. — user11153 1 min ago

Noon didn't say they wanted to diagnose anyone. They said 'How do I suggest to this Facebook friend that they might be on the spectrum?'. It is clear that Noon well understands the difference between internet quizzes and professional diagnosis and seeks to discuss a possibility with their friend, not give a diagnosis. I don't see how this answer can be 'reframing' something the OP hasn't said or asked. You suggest Noon asks if their friend has ever though they 'might' be on the spectrum rather than telling them they are, but that's precisely Noon's starting point, might be. — Spagirl 14 secs ago

"Hey Bob, I just heard about your chat with Alice on the sex topic. Just wanted to let you know that I respect your decision. Beer?" — Sven 51 secs ago

@user11153 hey, thanks for weighing in. I just want to say that your upbringing and your struggles as a kid were not your fault regardless of your diagnosis and I'm sorry that you had to endure that. Being "strange" as a kid is an incredibly frustrating thing. Also, I don't think you're disagreeing (with me) since in your case the diagnosis was helpful and that was the important part. — Benjamin Gruenbaum 1 min ago

@Acccumulation Bullies exist outside of school, kids should learn to deal with annoying/hurtful people at some point, the best place to do that is school. School is not supposed to be a space free of the evil that inhabits everybody's lives, it is a place to learn from each other without getting hurt too bad. — stimulate 1 min ago

And you need to know your BATNA - Best Alternative To a Negotiated Agreement. What will you do if you are refused a raise? And, the data above should be relevant to the person and couched in their terms, not yours. — Jon Custer 55 secs ago

"which has led her to the opinion that almost all of the country is obese" That's not far off. 70% of the US is overweight, and 35% of Americans are obese. — coinbird 15 secs ago

+1 from personal experience #3 is an important consideration especially when recovering from a break up or feeling lonely, ignoring this can lead to big regrets — BKlassen 36 secs ago

If you could focus your question on one specific situation and how you could tell them to accomplish some goal, your question would be a lot more on-topic. Something like "How can I tell a new friend that I have a mental disorder without making them uncomfortable/feel bad for me/be weirded out and never want to see me again?" (I'm joking a little with the last one, but hopefully you see the type of question I'm getting at). If you'd like some help critiquing and perfecting your question, I'd highly suggest stepping into the Sandbox — scohe001 1 min ago

+1 Your direct question "How could I make him stop ruining my free evenings?" could be rephrased slightly and instead answer the question "How can I find a way to relax that agrees with both of our requirements. — Sundararaj Govindasamy 9 secs ago