The Awkward Silence

Mithrandir24601

12:06 AM

Anyway, it's late and I'm off to bed - sȳz bantis! [good night]

Introverted Meta Man.

0

Q: How to handle touchy subjects?

Today we had a question that involved what some would view as a touchy subject, or a hot button issue. I'm deliberately not specifically calling this question out here because this question isn't exclusively about that question. I'm also sure that over time we'll end up dealing with a number o...

HDE 226868

1:58 AM

@heather I feel like Open Science doesn't have great chances of survival in any incarnation.

I was in the last private beta it had, and that wasn't great.

@ExtrovertedMainMan Story of my life, Extroverted Meta Man.

I need to get a summer job that doesn't involve not having Internet access.

Hamlet

2:34 AM

@HDE226868 working at a camp?

Zizouz212

3:29 AM

@GypsySpellweaver You're supposed to put your hands together, and do the head wobble :P

@YvetteColomb Bonjour! Comment allez vous? Le francais est tres facile a apprendre - vous pouvez l'apprendre rapidement!

You can clearly tell what 12 years of French schooling has done to me :P

sigh I'm always late to the party here. Talk about an awkward silence.

Gypsy Spellweaver

3:43 AM

@Zizouz212 now, why would I do a head wobble? isn't the translation of namaste bow me you?

Zizouz212

o_O

Namaste -> I see the divine in you

But yeah, you would bow. Not the head wobble

I was kind of joking at that part

Gypsy Spellweaver

A soul-to-soul greeting in recognition of the Divine spark in every one's soul?

Zizouz212

You can put it that way :)

SQB

5:14 AM

@Mithrandir24601 isn't there [Lojban.se]?

Apparently not, since it doesn't auto-expand. I thought they had made it.

Zizouz212

[lojban.se]

Yep nope.

@SQB Still in the definition stage

SQB

area51.stackexchange.com/proposals/103478/…

Ah yes, there it is.

And good morning!

Zizouz212

It's 1:26 am here :P

But sure! Good morning!

A J

Good Morning

Zizouz212

Good morning :D

A J

5:33 AM

And good morning ~~@SQB~~ S^3E

SQB

Top of the morning to ya!

(Is that something people would actually say? I only know it from West Side Story.)

Zizouz212

Never heard it :P

SQB

Say, is that "best way to fidget" question on topic?

3

Q: Fidgeting in a polite way

Okay, this sounds really stupid, but let me explain. There have been multiple times in class where I will be fidgeting in one way or another - clicking my pen, spinning the pencil on my desk, tapping my foot, etc - and I don't even notice. It really does help me focus to do something along these...

united-states school active-listening fidgeting

Zizouz212

I'd say yes. It's effectively asking "How do I not annoy people"

Yvette Colomb

5:54 AM

@Zizouz212 it may be easy for you! :D I can read it quite well, but cannot write it or talk it very well at all

Zizouz212

Twelve years...

@YvetteColomb Do I have a point in my comments on this: interpersonal.meta.stackexchange.com/questions/1305/…

Or am I just arguing a moot issue?

SQB

6:09 AM

@Zizouz212 Perhaps it's the current answer. That just lists a couple of ways to fidget. If all answers are like that, it's POB (primarily opinion based), since it then comes down to the querant's opinion.

Zizouz212

Yeah... But aren't most questions here like that too?

Yvette Colomb

@Zizouz212 I actually totally agree - it took me quite a while to watch the youtube video to figure out what he may have been meaning - I'm still not 100% sure what that has to do with the question. It needs examples

Zizouz212

We're basically an advanced polling site with rules on what you can pick :P

@YvetteColomb I tried...

Yvette Colomb

I really think you should provide some examples as the youtube video just makes it more confusing about the types of answers you think we should keep. Please consider providing examples, as that's what more meta post do when discussing a particular type of post. — Yvette Colomb 9 secs ago

I voted to close it as unclear what you're asking

Zizouz212

I think I'll do the same.

Yvette Colomb

6:13 AM

Meta encourages the use of examples

we need spam flags on this interpersonal.stackexchange.com/questions/1114/…

Zizouz212

Is it? It's crap, but it doesn't feel like spam to me. I don't know :/

Yvette Colomb

it's spam trust me

I've been a member of charcoal for a long time now

Charcoal HQ

Where smoke is detected, diamonds are made, and we break thing...

19

40

Introverted Meta Man.

6:32 AM

-1

Q: On heavily downvoted answers

Sometimes a heavily downvoted answer can still be useful in a Don't do what Donnie Don't Does sort of way, I'm thinking that in the long run these answers aren't completely useless. Even a bad example serves a purpose, and sometimes keeping them around may ultimately be good for our community. L...

discussion answers down-votes

Zizouz212

@IntrovertedMetaMan. You're late bud!

SQB

Agreeing on the spam. Not as blatant as some others, but spam nonetheless.

NVZ

@YvetteColomb I mean. I have had 4000 helpful flags on EL&U. I know spam. But this actually provides an answer (along with a link). We can remove the link and keep the answer, I think. It's not entirely spam is what I'm getting at.

Zizouz212

But! No! My comment will disappear! :P

This is complete nonsense. "Active listening" isn't something that you need to be old to be good at. It's actually something that is very easy to learn, if, like other things, you commit yourself to being good at it. As a teacher, I can tell you that most of my students are very good at listening actively. To say that somebody is probably not a good active listener because they may be young is wrong and stereotypical - it's something we promote in our schools and communities, and you've offered little reason to support your "stereotype." — Zizouz212 1 hour ago

SQB

Note for future mods: I usually flag attempts to proselytize as spam.

Zizouz212

6:37 AM

I wonder when we'll get them

NVZ

@Zizouz212 your comment is good. In this answer, I see an answer. And a comment disagreeing with the answer, and downvotes in the same vain.

Yvette Colomb

@SQB ? what do you mean?

NVZ

@SQB Sorry, what?

Yvette Colomb

@NVZ I need to get a link - they can put in decent answers - often they are plagiarised from other places - any excuse to get the link in

> Note for future mods: I usually flag attempts to proselytize as spam.

SQB

I mean that sometimes there's spam without an outgoing link. Usually, but not always, it's an attempt to promote a religion. I consider those spam and flag accordingly.

NVZ

6:39 AM

Anyways, I'll consider it spam on this one.

Yvette Colomb

Should Spam Posts Be Edited?

NVZ

Spam should not be edited. It will mess up with the flags.

Yvette Colomb

@SQB oh yeh - or rude and abusive of the site's ToS

Zizouz212

@NVZ Meh, doesn't change anything if I remember right

Yvette Colomb

@Zizouz212 it messes with the flags

Zizouz212

6:40 AM

It does? Oh well

NVZ

Ok bye. In office.

Yvette Colomb

it's good to educate the community here about how we deal with spam and rude/abusive posts and what the definition of those is

@NVZ \o

Zizouz212

@NVZ See you :)

Yvette Colomb

289

Q: Educating people to flag spam and not vote to close

TL DR Is there anything we can do to help educate users to use their flags and not their close votes on spam? It is not uncommon to see people voting to close spam. Spam should be flagged as spam and then it will be deleted when there are sufficient spam flags on the post. Between 15 and 20% ...

discussion flags vote-to-close spam

Zizouz212

OMG people actually like me

Yvette Colomb

6:42 AM

@Zizouz212 ? what on earth do you mean by that? of course we like you

Zizouz212

What is wrong with the world

Yvette Colomb

lolol

Zizouz212

That they'd trust a blue thing that keeps saying "Wynaut?"

Yvette Colomb

I have to tell you - I understand - I'm totally shocked how well I've done in the SO mod election

yep - I can see that with the blue thing

Zizouz212

@YvetteColomb Oh lol I just saw the score for my mod nomination :P

@YvetteColomb I think you'll make it :)

Yvette Colomb

6:44 AM

@Zizouz212 I came 5th in the primaries - I think the top 2 will be elected - there's a chance I could be asked to step up later. Doesn't matter - I will run next time

Zizouz212

Primaries? Meh, those don't matter!

SQB

And I agree that the "active listening" answer is spam. It's not of the shotgun variety, where it's totally unrelated to the question; it seems more targeted, with either the spammer actively searching for questions that fit more or less, or they're an evangelist and try to promote their product whenever they run into an opportunity.

Yvette Colomb

tots agree

NVZ

@SQB yep. I agree.

Zizouz212

7:05 AM

And the spam be gone!

Hi

@ASR Hello :)

hi

Helllo

awkward silence

7:13 AM

Let's make some noise

ASR

7:38 AM

How are you All?

Extroverted Main Man

8:41 AM

1

Q: How can I politely ask someone to get off their phone?

Firstly, I'm not asking someone to not use their phone at all in my presence. But, when I'm with someone and they're sat there scrolling through social media for a prolonged period of time and we've arranged to meet in a social capacity i.e. having a glass of wine at theirs/mine or going for a me...

friends speaking

NVZ

11:06 AM

@AJ sshh..

@ASR All is well.

Extroverted Main Man

12:35 PM

2

Q: How do I indicate interest in going somewhere without inviting myself along?

Sometimes acquaintances or people that I would like to get to know better are setting up some sort of social gathering (bar, party, bowling, etc) and I am not explicitly invited. I know that if I mention it they will invite me, but I feel that mentioning that I would like to go with them is "Invi...

awkward-situations social-event invitation

Extroverted Main Man

3:36 PM

1

Q: How can I politely tell someone I won't do my job for free?

I am a relatively open individual who is shy (for lack of a better word) around new people. One of my coworkers has a business and is asking for my help as a financial analyst outside of work, and while I'm more than happy to help my fear is that my coworker is thinking that I will do whatever t...

rudeness money professionalism

Introverted Meta Man.

1

Q: Why was my question closed? How can I improve it?

The question How can I calm myself down when giving a presentation? was closed recently as not about interpersonal skills within the scope defined in the help center. What...? This answer says (in response to the question "Is asking about public speaking on topic?"): speaking techniques...

discussion scope

Extroverted Main Man

4:39 PM

0

Q: It's my birthday! How do I tell people who don't know, who might want to know, without being awkward?

It's my birthday*! It's a rather important birthday. There are a lot of people who might want to know such a thing, because of social customs or friendliness or something. One of those things. Mostly, these people are coworkers. However, there are a few newer friends of mine whom I haven't ye...

socialising

Yvette Colomb

9:31 PM

theepochtimes.com/n3/…

who was talking about the languages proposal on Area51?

Mithrandir24601

@YvetteColomb Conlang? You might be talking about me

Catija

@YvetteColomb Sorry about your SO nomination. :) Looks like you were in third place. Too bad there weren't three spots!

Mithrandir

9:48 PM

@YvetteColomb that's scary

Catija

Oh, I just realized... I can tell you apart because one of you is blue.

Mithrandir

And different avatars, and @Mithrandir24601 has a number ;)

Catija

The avatars are practically indistinguishable when they're tiny... and the number isn't visible, either.

Mithrandir24601

@YvetteColomb so, I don't really know much about machine learning, except that you have inputs and outputs. You then use weighting to improve the output for certain inputs and ignore the bit in the middle, which very nearly always appears to be nonsense. This is the 'language' the network (not really AI) created. Of course it's nonsense! If it wasn't, you wouldn't need to train the network and just tell it 'this means that'

@Catija I'm using my phone and there's a clear difference between both the avatars and usernames :P

Catija

@Mithrandir24601 I'm on a giant monitor and the images are a quarter of an inch in each direction.

Mithrandir

9:55 PM

@Mithrandir24601 heh, same

Yvette Colomb

@Catija I'm so happy! It's much better than I hoped. If they call up more mods - I'll be asked.

@Mithrandir24601 yep

@Mithrandir are you the same person?

Extroverted Main Man

0

Q: How to tell nicely to someone I am not interested in a second date?

I have a good friend who is absolutely cross with me, because, as he claims, I am all coding and no fun lately, as in 24/7. I also have rules about not dating at the workplace for obvious reasons, and in the weekends we mostly do trekking and other outdoor activities with our group of old friend...

friends awkward-situations

Mithrandir

@YvetteColomb no

@ExtrovertedMainMan I recognize that avatar... Rita S?

...yes, but they changed their name.

Yvette Colomb

@Mithrandir ah thanks

Catija

10:25 PM

@YvetteColomb That's awesome! :D

Extroverted Main Man

11:47 PM

0

Q: Responding to unknown "popular culture" references

Sometimes references will come up in conversation to players in different sports, singers, or other popular culture references, and most of the time they come up, I have no idea what's being talked about. To give an idea of how bad my knowledge of these things is, I was talking with my mom once...

conversations

Introverted Meta Man.

11:58 PM

0

Q: Should business related questions be off-topic?

I'm aware that there tends to be some overlap between Stack Exchange sites, something being on topic elsewhere shouldn't necessarily make it off-topic here, but I'm thinking that we should be cautious about accepting questions that are more about business than they are about interpersonal skills ...

discussion scope migration

Charcoal HQ

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