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3:00 PM
Quiz time!
What does the manhole say?
 
Jez
hey
 
Yup.
Sep 23 at 11:04, by RegDwighт
I believe in the existence of angels.
 
Jez
Mr Jantjie said that during his episode, he continued seeing things and hearing loud voices in his head that impaired his ability to hear well and interpret what was being said.

He told the newspaper that he could not leave, so stayed on and continued to sign things that did not make sense.

Thamsanqa Jantjie (Facebook)

“Life is unfair. This illness is unfair. Anyone who doesn’t understand this illness will think that I’m just making this up,” he said.
hilarious
 
3:01 PM
He might be telling the truth.
 
Jez
no way
 
Actually, his track record suggests that it might be precisely the people who do understand this illness that will think that he's just making it up.
 
Oh?
 
@JasperLoy It wasn't the people who don't understand sign language that thought he was making it up.
 
Jez
i love the audacity of it
he mustn't have been called out on it before. people just assume that stuff is sign language lol
 
3:05 PM
It did look legit to me.
He translated "remember" the same way each time, for instance.
 
Jez
you can read sign language?
 
@Jez no, and that's the point.
 
Hey sharky, did you swallow that walrus whole?
 
That's one slender shark.
It is but two studs wide. The walrus counts six.
 
@RegDwigнt With a wave of the hand? Sounds pretty general to me.
 
3:08 PM
@Robusto no, with a touch of right temple.
I'm just saying I couldn't fake it anywhere as well. I could fake playing piano though, or writing in English. You need a certain skill level.
It takes a pro to suck next to Obama.
 
I think he is just crazy, like he says.
 
No crazy person would admit to being crazy.
 
@RegDwigнt Except me.
 
This guy fooled you once, so you're gonna believe him now.
I understand your reasoning, I just don't follow it.
 
Wow, I have a star in this chat.
 
3:15 PM
You become obsessed too easily.
 
You should watch that movie, really.
 
I did.
 
Did you like it?
 
Not impressed.
 
3:16 PM
I prefer sports.
 
What sports?
 
This is the kind of navigation you can expect in Russia.
 
NFL
 
For future reference. We discussed.
 
Of course, we have no idea what the signs say.
 
3:17 PM
That's the point. You have no idea what the signs say even after they have been "translated" for you.
 
lol
 
@RegDwigнt Wow, that's really helpful!
Now I know exactly where to go.
 
@KitFox and how do you like them Pirogov?
 
Over easy.
 
Clinic them? lol
 
3:18 PM
\o/
 
Jez
is Vokzal a place?
 
Vokzal is a train station. That sign says "railway station".
Except it does not.
 
So one should not go to Russia for vacation.
 
"Clinic them Pirogov" is a hospital named after one N. I. Pirogov.
@JasperLoy and exactly nobody does, unless they speak the language.
 
@JasperLoy Napoleon hated it.
 
3:20 PM
I was trying to learn Russian, but my brain kept hemorrhaging.
 
I have almost not travelled abroad my life.
 
And "dom Youth" is something like youth club.
Dom means "house".
 
I knew that one.
 
I thought it was for condoms.
 
@Robusto Yes, from JavaScript.
 
3:21 PM
"Condoms for youths" lol
 
How is that a lol?
You're a lol.
 
Nah, it's one of the few words I remember from my two semesters of high-school Russian.
 
OIC
 
\/
 
So looks like even the Russians can only translate Russian using Google Translate
"Im" actually is the pronoun "them", except that the "im." here stands for "imeni", "named after", from "imya", "name".
 
3:24 PM
@RegDwigнt Что это? Это стул.
beams
 
In Mother Russia, signs translate you.
 
So I guess it only serves the Russians well that Google Maps have updated their interface.
 
стул в доме.
 
OH MY GOD! LOOK OUT, LADY!
 
Now every street, which would be "ulitsa", is called "khulitsa", which roughly translates to "abuse-treet".
@Robusto I am amazed at the proper case.
 
3:26 PM
@RegDwigнt Sounds like every street in Russia.
 
Квид про кво.
 
@RegDwigнt I don't remember much, but what I do remember I remember correctly. I think.
@RegDwigнt Trying to trick me with Cyrillicized Latin, eh?
 
Трайинг?
 
Trainer?
 
See. Wurks.
 
3:28 PM
No.
Trainning.
I dunno.
 
Trying, you silly person.
Where's my hats anyway.
I want hats and I want they now.
 
I no now.
 
Not yet! You must be patient.
 
Ein Bummer!
 
Why you keep changing avatar Reg?
 
3:30 PM
Oh! I forgot! Somewhere I have the shopped avatar with the hat.
 
Why you keep creating new accounts Jasper?
 
@RegDwigнt Zwei Bumsen!
 
Try Bumming!
 
@KitFox my copy is probably lost forever to The Great Crash. Some things I didn't think of backing up.
 
Well, I can probably find it for you. brb
 
3:31 PM
@KitFox Fucking is better.
 
I prefer Berlin.
 
@Robusto I'd like to see you order that in St. Pauli.
 
@RegDwigнt I would only order it from a St. Pauli Girl.
 
Or Reeperbahn, wevs. Same difference.
Okay here's one final test for Kit. If you can read this, you are fluent in Russian and beyond.
 
3:33 PM
I don't think she'd have time for two Bumsen.
She barely finds the time to handle all the beer.
 
2 mins ago, by Robusto
@KitFox Fucking is better.
 
She is mine.
 
@RegDwigнt OK, so I shouldn't dump anything in there during the winter months because someone lives there then?
 
@RegDwigнt But I bet she gives good . . . er . . . can't think of German for "hand jobs"
 
@KitFox I don't know, I am barely halfway through with it.
 
3:35 PM
@Robusto Pretty sure they call them "handys".
 
What Unsinn!
Hand job is "einen runterholen".
 
looks dubious
 
@RegDwigнt And an extra one is a wiederholen?
 
Now I know that Reg Dwight = Russia Deutscheland, QED.
 
@RegDwigнt Wait, wouldn't that be a "reach around"?
 
3:37 PM
@Robusto no, "get one down"
Usually reflexive.
 
Ah, ok.
 
Sich einen runterholen.
Get oneself one down.
 
Oh, because it's standing up.
 
Geezis.
 
@KitFox Ideally.
 
3:38 PM
@KitFox Actually I only just realized that myself. You never think about such things.
 
@RegDwigнt You never think about these things.
There, and I found your hat.
 
WTF?
 
High-gloss periodical about finance.
 
3:39 PM
It's as good a title as any.
 
@KitFox thank you.
 
My pleasure.
 
YOU WILL WEAR THE RED HAT
 
I like it much better than The Economist. As a title for a financial publication, that is.
 
You don't have to wear it, but now you have the option.
 
3:40 PM
This title wasn't bad.
 
INCORRECT
 
There is The Daily WTF, of course, but its coverage of financial matters is spotty at best.
@RegDwigнt That is a headline, not a title.
 
Is that a photoshopped cover?
 
@Robusto Same difference. Remember "clinic them pirogov"?
 
Because if it's not I think I should subscribe.
 
3:40 PM
@MετάEd no.
 
Stop talking about pierogies and snow and shit.
 
They already have a great reputation; now they have great covers. Nice!
 
@MετάEd they never even tell you who wrote the articles. Otherwise you'd know they are written by 12-year olds and would never subscribe in the first place.
@Robusto and I mean cover, not headline.
Titelbild in German.
Vs. just Titel.
 
@RegDwigнt In the Economist, nobody knows you are a dog.
 
Titelbild und Titelkopf?
Kinda like Tweedledum and Tweedledee.
 
3:42 PM
Perhaps there's a Titelkopf as well. You never know. I wouldn't.
@Robusto gib mir die Rassel zurück!
 
NÖÖÖÖÖÖÖÖÖÖÖ! Meine!
 
> The magazine is written by young people pretending to be old people...If American readers got a look at the pimply complexions of their economic gurus, they would cancel their subscriptions in droves.
There, that's the correct quote.
 
All young people in Britain are actually old people.
 
That makes it easy for you to know all about their fucking skills.
 
I have no fucking skills.
 
3:46 PM
No Sex Please, We're British is a 1973 British comedy film directed by Cliff Owen and starring Ronnie Corbett, Ian Ogilvy, Susan Penhaligon and Arthur Lowe. It is based on the 1971 play No Sex Please, We're British with a number of changes to the original plot. Synopsis Runnicles, a clerk in a small-town British bank (openly depicted in the film as the branch of Barclays Bank in Windsor High Street), is horrified when a package arrives containing pornography rather than the new calculator he expected. His efforts to dispose of it, while avoiding detection, turn into a farcical series of ...
 
That sounds hilarious.
 
Never watched it.
 
Yeah, "Ronnie Corbett", "Ian Ogilvy", "Susan Penhaligon" and "Arthur Lowe". That's some funny slang right there.
 
Weird names.
 
Wait till you see their screen names.
 
3:49 PM
@Kit what was your question, quick. Otherwise it will be later tonight.
 
Oh! Um.
recalibrates
This project that I'm on, they are looking at improving the search function for a subset of pages on the public site.
I'm trying to remember why I thought there was something I could ask you.
 
@KitFox nice hat :)
 
The pages are pre-built html and he's using MongoDB. Damn, there was something specific I thought you wold know something about.
Except I can't remember now.
 
If you aren’t just going with Google, and you want something better, you’re might be going to have to do some NLP work, like synonym sets, or worse, actual meaning inference.
I assume you're already stemming.
 
I think the whole thing is hokey. I don't understand why they are spending so much time building static pages. They apparently take hours and are built nightly.
 
3:53 PM
So they can be fetched quickly and can be cached.
 
But they aren't fetched quickly.
 
But if you have to rebuild an index each time, that’s going to take the time you mentioned.
 
Oh, that was the thing!
 
What?
Index rebuilds?
 
There is inconsistency in the search response time. I thought it probably had to do with the way the indexes are being accessed, but I'm not sure I understand how he's fitting the pieces together.
He says he's going to switch over to using JSON instead of...shit, whatever he's doing now.
I thought that sounded like a good plan, but I still can't figure why the response times are so incredibly slow.
He did brag to me at one point that he had indexed every letter, and I thought that sounded like someone who didn't know how to do effective indexing.
Still and all, we are talking possibly 10,000 pages. Doesn't seem like it ought to take seconds to search them.
 
3:57 PM
Commute. Lators.
 
It shouldn’t.
 
@KitFox Why would he index every letter? That is obsessive in the extreme.
 
Depends on indexing tech.
 
But I don't do search stuff, and I don't understand the system well, and he's generally uncooperative.
 
3:58 PM
Plus I don’t smell any stemming.
 
@KitFox Oh, that guy. Have you tried hitting him with a stapler or something?
 
He's using a library, and they are working on what they call "faceted search" which sounds to me sort of like using XQuery and nodes.
 
Eeeesh.
 
Which made me think that using xml might be equally as effective and more supportable than what we have going on.
 
Too many layers of indirection to actually ascertain/analyse anything.
Well, from a satellite-eye view like this.
 
4:00 PM
Personally, I'd dump it and use a live database connection. But that's my bailiwick, so of course I'd say that.
 
I needs must commute. Hasta la vista, baby.
 
Thanks.
And most concerning of all, as far as I'm concerned, is that he is talking about disabling the back button to "provide a consistent experience."
That shouts to me that he can't possibly, possibly know anything about good coding practice.
 
certainly nothing about good UX
 
@Robusto Yeah, that guy. It's not you, is it?
 
you make your site work with the back button
 
4:02 PM
I'm not sure what to do about this project.
 
@KitFox No. Not me.
 
@Robusto I thought you would have more sense, if I ever actually knew you.
 
@KitFox I do have more sense. But I wish I had more money than sense. Just once.
 
Haha.
So, given the very slanted way I'm presenting this information, do you then agree that I should feel apprehensive? Or is this just me being new and not knowing things?
 
There is a search library called Solr which we use on our site and it's pretty good.
 
4:09 PM
How does it work? Or should I go and read up on it?
Oh! Apache.
I could get behind that.
 
Jez
I wish I had @KitFox's problem
 
Oh, this sounds like what I was thinking of...they prebuild the pages, so I thought, what if rather than prebuilding them as html, they built them as xml and then used an xml searching library.
 
Jez
i'm not unsure; I'm pretty sure the way things are done here are sucky
course I say "here", I mostly mean India
 
@KitFox I'd be apprehensive.
 
Do you think my idea is good? Naive?
 
4:17 PM
@KitFox The most consistent experience of all would be an app that presented only a blank screen. The man is a fool.
 
CDC webcast on flu activity and vaccination coverage in about a half an hour
 
I am on pins and needles.
 
I am on puns and noodles
 
I am on pens and nettles.
 
I am on pans and nibbles
 
4:35 PM
I am on posts and news.
 
@KitFox You could probably index the html pages
 
I am on pwns and noddles.
 
Do you think this strategy going to work?
 
I am on penicillins and nibblets
 
Ok so, she and I are going to watch Hobbit 2 tomorrow and when movie starts and lights go out, I'm going to write this question on my phone and ask her
me: "Hey, can I ask you a question?"
"ok"
me: "your breast size is AA isn't it?"
 
4:38 PM
I am on pons and nipples
 
"No it's B!"
Me: "Bullshxx, can I check?"
 
no that won't work
 
how come?
 
because it's corny
 
has she ever made it seem like you can touch her breasts before?
 
4:40 PM
no
 
why would it be cool now?
so you think she wants you to touch her breasts?
 
Jez
probably will work. jerks always seem to get women.
 
50/50
 
well, I guess you've got nothing to lose.
 
4:41 PM
but she can slap you in the dark
 
so i'm going to attempt
 
and believe me it hurts more when you don't see it coming >8(
 
I'm giving 2:1 on that she'll reject you.
10:1 on that she'll punch you in the nuts
 
I'll take that bet.
do you take bitcoin?
 
4:45 PM
\o/
 
/o/
 
He takes betcoin.
 
are you going to hold the bets?
 
@MattЭллен I am on peens and nodules.
@EnglishMaster So your goal is not to get laid, right?
 
4:48 PM
@MattЭллен I'm with you. This approach is disrespectful.
But I have to run.
 
Gosh, I don't want to talk about it here anymore
 
Have you seen Hobbit 1?
 
Is it scary?
 
I hope Hobbit 2 is boring so she won't pay too much attention to the movie
Hobbit 1 is gay
 
4:53 PM
Romantic movies are better context, right?
 
Context is King
 
@EnglishMaster it had its moments, but I thought it was more actiony than jovial.
 
@EnglishMaster It's excessive. If each book of TLotR had its own movie, The Hobbit should merit a single movie. The movie trilogy has been transformed into the reciprocal of the book.
 
How does a book have a reciprocal?
 
4:56 PM
@Robusto How did you feel about the last two Harry Potter movies?
 
@MετάEd I didn't watch them. That franchise lost me at around the third or fourth movie.
 
@Robusto But do you mind that the last book was split into two movies?
 
@MετάEd Since I didn't watch it and don't care about it, no.
I didn't read the books, either.
I tried to get through the first one, for my son's sake, but I gave up at around page 50.
Her writing style annoys me.
 
@Robusto I'd like to see somebody do this (serialized movies) for The Once And Future King.
Four films.
 
I don't mind serialization, in general, if it lends itself to that. Too often single movies leave out too much of the book. But if you can do a good job getting most of the important stuff in each of the Rings books out in a four hour film, surely the same could be done with The Hobbit.
You could make a miniseries out of, say, Moby-Dick, or War and Peace.
 
5:03 PM
@Robusto I guess it depends on the book. Some books can sustain serialization and some can't. If Hobbit can, then, well, it can. Otherwise it can't. The proof is at the box office.
 
The proof, for me, is in my mind. The Hobbit is much more linear than any of the LotR books, and hasn't the same logical stopping points.
Also, they're trying so hard to turn Thorin into Aragorn that it perverts what I see as Tolkien's original characterization.
Nov 6 at 1:51, by Robusto
He's blowing up a Hobbit balloon, trying to be as big as TLotR, and soon it will burst.
Jul 30 '12 at 19:03, by Robusto
If The Hobbit had been a cow Peter Jackson couldn't have milked it any harder.
Jan 14 at 16:49, by Robusto
BTW, saw The Hobbit: An Unexpected Journey yesterday. I got to the "An Unexpected Pause" part. Really, what a waste of time. Peter Jackson flashes a lot of special effects at us and calls that a movie. He'd better be careful, because he's in danger of becoming George Lucas.
 
@Robusto So it's worse than the LotR films?
 
@Cerberus I would say so.
 
OK noted.
Where is the first stop anyway? I forgot what route they took. Not through Imladris?
 
5:32 PM
@Trig I suppose...I'm not particularly attracted to young anyway. But I imagine he looked older that he was.
 
@English The problem is that first you are insulting her, then asking to touch her boobs.
If you want to have a shot at it working, you should compliment her boobs first.
It's not rocket science.
 
5:53 PM
@EnglishMaster Is this a good thing or a bad thing?
 
@EnglishMaster Have you considered a more standard order of things? Touch shoulder, later touch hand, later take hand and hold hands if she doesn't pull away, then later pointedly touch her neck to move in for a kiss (but probably not in the dark)? Boob touching should usually come after that, I would say.
 
He's 13. He's lucky he's going to a movie with a girl.
 
Yes.
Although, if he wants to do what grown-ups do, perhaps he should try to be more like one...
I had no idea he was that young, though.
 
I'm just guessing. He acts like a kid.
 

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