@MετάEd "That which teases [amongst] itself, loves [amongst] itself", if I understand the expression correctly.

So people who tease each other, love each other.

As I have always understood it.

Um, hey.

help

hello?

Hi @3v0

hi

Fresh out! Orthodox Calendar 2016!

is an unorthodox calendar one that has the dates in the wrong order?

More like in the wrong angle.

@RegDwigнt Or simply in the wrong aisle at the Jesus store.

that question is maybe stupid, but if you put a bike on 2 scales, and sit on it, or say a car on 4 scales, will they show the same value?

No.

Instructions unclear.

Stand on two scales.

But they'll add up to the same value as putting the entire thing on a single scale.

Assuming perfect scales.

yes the sum of them, of course

You can do the same test with one scale.

ok so different values, interesting

Put the front bike tire on the scale first, record the weight. Then repeat with the back tire.

Or a Wii Fit Board.

Whose whole point is that your weight changes any second you wish.

My bikes tend to distribute the weight somewhat more to the rear than the front. Maybe all bikes do.

But you don't need a scale to tell you that. Check the wear on the tires.

@RegDwigнt OK, all modern bikes.

Actually I bet the weight for that non-modern bike is still very much on the rear.

Look where his fat ass is.

Couldn't you have found a picture of a hot Asian nurse riding that bike?

I don't think you're putting any effort into this at all.

Yeah of course you don't think that, why would you think that?

I don't understand why anyone would think that.

Indeed.

Herr C und P.

Holy shit. This just in. The internet does not, I repeat: not, contain a single image of a hot asian nurse riding a bike.

Robusto has breaked rule 34.

What!!!

That cannot be.

Did you check the whole Internet?

that's all I could find

That is a dismal failure. Worse than @Reg's not trying at all.

good enough for jazz

I can't wait till that scrolls off the page.

Ever since they changed their logo, Google sucks.

Except not hard enough.

@RegDwigнt did you try duckduckgo.com/… :)

I said the internet, not the darknet.

I didn't say runet, either, so I didn't try Yandex, either.

I bet vkontakte has 9001 five-hour videos of Asian nurses riding bikes.

duckduckgo searches the deepnet

@Mitch Good enough to make me start hating jazz, maybe.

Fact: 99.73% of all people have never heard of duckduck, deepnet, or Russia.

So is that a disaster, a catastrophe, or a calamity?

@RegDwigнt We're not hearing about Ukraine anymore since it was annexed. Does that count?

It should be noted, however, that of all the Asian nurses riding bicycles duckduck finds, exactly zero are Asian nurses.

Assuming that all Asians are nurses is racist against nurses.

Some kind of strike, perhaps?

Or maybe all the hot Asian nurses riding bikes are behind a paywall?

> I'm just going to go find a cash machine.

Just look, still not a single Asian nurse riding a bicycle.

Mule en rouge.

And why is there a blonde chick at the bottom there? Google ran out of Asians? Come on, half the frickin' world is Asian.

Maybe someone got bored when playing that stupid "label my images for me for free" game Google offers, and labeled that chick a bicycle.

Or went blind by playing the game for too long.

So many possibilities.

So much logic.

Maybe she colored her hair?

Maybe she was an Asian in her previous life.

In fact she must, since only Asians come back to life as other things.

Catholics e. g. just die. Though somehow it still takes them thousands of years to die off completely.

That is because Catholics do not believe in evolution, and consequently refuse to learn from the dinosaurs.

Does the pope shit in the pre-Cambrian ocean?

[ SmokeDetector ] Offensive answer detected: Is it common to use "mule" to refer to stupidity? by skrile on english.stackexchange.com

@Robusto of course not. The pope shits in the praerie.

I'm not talking about your Hitlerjugend pope.

Somehow nobody does anymore.

Speaking of nobody. I can't help noticing exactly nobody has joined the Army yet despite my promotional efforts.

Known for his fancy footwear.

So today, I will promote a different organization.

Join the European Parliament!

Elvis Costello even wrote a song about that. He was prescient.

@cornbreadninja麵包忍者: ^^

Prepubescient.

Time for a geography quiz. @Cerberus.

graphemica.com/%F0%9F%91%8D (just testing this url with an unicode)

An unicode?

http://graphemica.com/👍

Holy moly.

Speaking of URLs.

Check out how SO encodes stack-overflow-на-русском.

it gives up :)

Hei, can you help me with a little text? I'm not a speaker of english and really tried my best

But I can't know if it is good or not

@RegDwigнt is that part of Antarctica?

Nope. Also not the Moon.

@RegDwigнt Catholics do believe in evolution.

Then why don't they evolve into non-catholics.

Some do. I did.

But then you're not a catholic. QED.

Cf. Epimenides the Cretan says, all the Cretans are liars.

I found a hot paediatric nurse riding a bike, but I don't think she's from the Asian continent

I did say Rob breaked the Internet.

@RegDwigнt Not any more. But the fact that a butterfly is no longer a caterpillar doesn't disprove that caterpillars turn into butterflies.

Err.

It does disprove the fact that caterpillars are butterflies.

One cannot disprove facts.

If that even needed disproving.

Jinx.

@RegDwigнt That's so dumb.

No. That's SO dumb.

mac(tchrist)% echo stack-overflow-на-русском. | perl -MText::Unidecode -CS -nle 'print unidecode($_)'
stack-overflow-na-russkom.

Needs unidecoding into Latin.

If that's what they require.

@RegDwigнt That looks like Russia, since it includes Poland.

Yeah. London's in Russia, too.

Jack London was only ever in Alaska, not Russia.

If anything, St. Petersburg is in Texas rather than Texas is in St. Petersburg.

It can join Paris there.

And Canada.

@RegDwigнt But I'm not holding myself up as an example of a Catholic who believes in Evolution. The pope has decreed that evolution is true.

Yeah the pope is trolling harder every day.

He's trying the conscience of his phlox.

Next up he'll admit to what the Buddhists have been saying all along: that after resurrection, Jesus went to India to study Buddhism.

Well, this was several popes ago

not the new trendy pope

Which of them? Be specific. There's two.

Duopapa.

Habemus papaya.

Red shoe, brown shoe, gum shoe, skid.

Skid row California, even the strong die.

@RegDwigнt Soon.

@Mr.ShinyandNew安宇 Has he really?

@Cerberus decades ago.

I see.

@Cerberus I don't think he used a Capital Letter for it.

> In the 1950 encyclical Humani generis, Pope Pius XII confirmed that there is no intrinsic conflict between Christianity and the theory of evolution, provided that Christians believe that the individual soul is a direct creation by God and not the product of purely material forces.

@tchrist Maybe he put it in the Bible.

@Cerberus yes, thanks to global warming London will soon be underwater, and all underwater has been claimed by Russia a while ago.

R'lyeh.

@Mr.ShinyandNew安宇 Hmm I didn't know that. But it explains why Catholics are never fussing about evolution.

@RegDwigнt Oh, I thought only the water under the north pole.

Oil not water.

Cerberus didn't know a basic fact. OMG. Next up he'll tell us he never watched Sex and the City II.

@Cerberus yeah but once you're underwater, do tell me: how on Earth can you tell me where on Earth you are? QED.

@Cerberus It's also one extra brick in the wall between Catholics and the other Christians who feel that Catholics aren't Christian. Which always annoyed me when I was still Catholic.

@Cerberus all water is under the north pole

Catholics are not Christians.

They are so not Christians, even Mr Shiny turned his back on them.

@RegDwigнt I ask Google.

Courageous.

@Mr.ShinyandNew安宇 Haha, but Catholics feel that Protestants aren't Christian.

Your Android crapfest won't work underwater. Get an iPhone.

@Cerberus Not the catholics I knew.

@MattE.Эллен Did you know that gravity of the ice on Antarctica pulls the water south hard enough to have a significant effect on sea levels?

@RegDwigнt !!

@Mr.ShinyandNew安宇 It is their traditional position.

What, not the missionary?

@Cerberus yes. the same is true of the ice on Greenland

The same is true of the ice in my coke glass.

@MattE.Эллен Right. But the Antarctic ice is much heavier, right?

yo mama joke here

@RegDwigнt Not significantly.

You are not significantly.

@Cerberus probably.

I once read an article about it.

Its preliminary conclusion was that sea levels on the southern hemisphaere would rise much higher than those on the northern one if the ice on Greenland melted, because Antarctica would pull at them so hard (and not melt so fast itself).

> West Antarctica has lost so much ice between 2009 and 2012 that the gravity field over the region dipped, according to an announcement Friday from the European Space Agency (ESA). The conclusion is based on high-resolution measurements from satellites that map Earth’s gravity.

When the ice sheet slips off of Greenland, the island itself will start to rise.

@Cerberus yes

@Mitch same thing happens to me in the morning

@Mr.ShinyandNew安宇 There's also no intrinsic conflict in believability between Christianity and ghosts/witches. Except they're competing for the same souls

@MattE.Эллен Zing!

@MattE.Эллен Inappropriapism.