FYI, even if you use the term obese, it doesn't necessarily indicate lack of fitness. I'm very much in the obese category according to such metrics, but I powerlift and walk everywhere (no car) and do lots of other active things. Please stop assuming the weight alone disqualifies her. — Ash 48 secs ago
00:00 - 20:0020:00 - 00:00
12:02 AM
#11871 Ash (449 rep) | Q: How to tell an overweight person that the hike will be too hard? (score: 70) | posted 3 days ago by iFlo (454 rep) | edited 2 days ago by iFlo (454 rep)
1 hour later…
1:03 AM
@MathieuK. Doing what you think is "right" is part of doing things you like. Doing what we think is right makes us feel good and better about ourselves. That the choice isn't always between "obviously unenjoyable thing" and "obviously awesome thing" isn't remotely remarkable. That's normal life. People do things they don't like when they're at gun point or are otherwise in duress. People do what they like when picking between whether to eat a burger or brown rice tempeh casserole. — zibadawa timmy 1 min ago
#11758 zibadawa timmy (101 rep) | A: How do I answer the question "why are you vegan?" honestly, without making them resent me? (score: 64) | posted 5 days ago by peufeu (9536 rep) | edited 3 days ago by peufeu (9536 rep)
#11826 Em C (5880 rep) | A: As a woman, how to avoid angry stares from other people's wives or girlfriends (score: 60) | posted 4 days ago by Em C (5880 rep)
Sounds to me like someone don't really know women... a pretty woman validating someone else's relationship is often understood as a indication of interest / provocation. Source: happened many times with me / my wife. — Rodolfo Perottoni 2 mins ago
#11826 Rodolfo Perottoni (101 rep) | A: As a woman, how to avoid angry stares from other people's wives or girlfriends (score: 60) | posted 4 days ago by Em C (5880 rep)
2 hours later…
2:53 AM
Comments are not for extended discussion; this conversation has been moved to chat. — HDE 226868 ♦ 56 secs ago
#11408 HDE 226868 (6080 rep) | A: Accused of Racism at Work (score: 6) | posted 13 days ago by Rose Hartman (1754 rep) | edited 13 days ago by Rose Hartman (1754 rep)
Comments are not for extended discussion; this conversation has been moved to chat. — HDE 226868 ♦ 52 secs ago
#11733 HDE 226868 (6080 rep) | A: What is the best way to begin a discussion around a compromise for our wedding location with my fiancée? (score: 17) | posted 5 days ago by Astralbee (8079 rep)
3:41 AM
How old are you both ? How are you built compared to him (thin/agile/overweight) ? I'm asking these because it's common for grown ups to request stuff from younger kids(get me the chair/remote/paper) so if you were young when your sis got married, there's a chance he considers you as a kid. Also, it's faster for an agile person to answer the doorbell, pick up stuff that an overweight person to do the same . — svj 1 min ago
#12034 svj (646 rep) | Q: Saying no to frequent but trivial favors (score: 0) | posted 4 hours ago by Ploni (265 rep)
4:28 AM
#11747 Mehrdad (1763 rep) | A: How do I answer the question "why are you vegan?" honestly, without making them resent me? (score: 115) | posted 5 days ago by Dan Anderson (6092 rep) | edited 3 days ago by Community (1 rep)
In addition to avoiding alone time with any males and indicating disinterest in a male’s preferred activities, you can specifically engage the females and disengage the males. This could indicate commonality and build rapport (even if temporary) with the female. In the case of the train seating, establishing rapport with the female, disengaging the male, and letting the interaction slowly wind down may allow the female to perceive that you would not be interested in her partner, and are not interested in continuing the interaction in general (since the interaction has ended). — user3.1415927 1 min ago
#11826 user3.1415927 (76 rep) | A: As a woman, how to avoid angry stares from other people's wives or girlfriends (score: 61) | posted 4 days ago by Em C (5890 rep)
2 hours later…
6:45 AM
#1897 Abhishek Ekaanth (101 rep) | A: How can I respond when someone asks me when I'm going to get married to my girlfriend? (score: 43) | posted 214 days ago by Rory Alsop (2653 rep) | edited 213 days ago by Rory Alsop (2653 rep)
7:31 AM
@RichardU Insults to get deleted if you flag them, it can just seem like they don't because if you pick the worst time in the day to to that it can be a couple hours before. — Magisch 16 secs ago
#2634 Magisch (6702 rep) | Q: How do we engage more people to contribute on meta, to create a wider mandate for our policies? (score: 9) | posted 3 days ago by JAD (3513 rep) | edited 2 days ago by JAD (3513 rep)
@Catija Do you really think the answer to an outstanding quality problem here is to allow fewer people to close and delete? I'd like to see some stats of how many users that'd be impacted by this regularly reopen trash. — Magisch 10 secs ago
#2649 Magisch (6702 rep) | A: How do we engage more people to contribute on meta, to create a wider mandate for our policies? (score: 1) | posted 44 hours ago by goldPseudo (101 rep)
7:48 AM
#12018 user2497 (101 rep) | A: I dreamed you did so and so. Why did you do that? - How to react? (score: 0) | posted 14 hours ago by user23013 (111 rep)
#11989 user2497 (101 rep) | A: I dreamed you did so and so. Why did you do that? - How to react? (score: 53) | posted 45 hours ago by LinuxBlanket (5099 rep) | edited 41 hours ago by LinuxBlanket (5099 rep)
#2649 JAD (3513 rep) | A: How do we engage more people to contribute on meta, to create a wider mandate for our policies? (score: 1) | posted 44 hours ago by goldPseudo (101 rep)
@goldPseudo I see, it's pretty much the same as what I have been trying to say in the question. We have been using meta to try and grind out some rules for the site, only to find out that indeed it offers no power in itself, so votes end up overruled and disputed. This brings is to my question, how do you engage users to participate on meta, such that meta is an actual reflection of main in terms of its users, so that main can reflect meta in terms of policy. — JAD 9 secs ago
#2649 JAD (3513 rep) | A: How do we engage more people to contribute on meta, to create a wider mandate for our policies? (score: 1) | posted 44 hours ago by goldPseudo (101 rep)
#11985 user2497 (99 rep) | A: I dreamed you did so and so. Why did you do that? - How to react? (score: 3) | posted 46 hours ago by OldPadawan (8522 rep) | edited 46 hours ago by OldPadawan (8522 rep)
This answer is factually correct. Why downvote? Because I cop a feel? Don’t stifle my freedom of (factually correct) speech, how about that? I am 100% down with feminism, but you need to realize that I am right. — user2497 35 secs ago
#12042 user2497 (99 rep) | A: I dreamed you did so and so. Why did you do that? - How to react? (score: -1) | posted 12 minutes ago by user2497 (99 rep)
#12011 user2497 (99 rep) | A: I dreamed you did so and so. Why did you do that? - How to react? (score: 1) | posted 20 hours ago by Bob (11 rep)
@NotThatGuy Yes, but when she wakes up she isn’t using modern brainparts very well. So she needs reassurance. — user2497 46 secs ago
#11982 user2497 (99 rep) | Q: I dreamed you did so and so. Why did you do that? - How to react? (score: 25) | posted 47 hours ago by Edgar (1917 rep) | edited 44 hours ago by Crafter0800 (5044 rep)
#12006 I am the Most Stupid Person (144 rep) | Q: How can I convince my SO that $1000 per night is too much for a hotel? (score: 8) | posted 28 hours ago by Chaotic (269 rep) | edited 17 hours ago by Kate Gregory (15565 rep)
Maybe she can. I have a friend who is super duper obese, I mean this guy is massiive. But every year he walks several hundred kilometers on the bilbumen track. By all accounts (I havent hiked with him) he huffs and puffs the whole way, but this guys like the terminator, he just wont be stopped by mere pain. Maybe your friends like that. Carrying all that weight around can translate to pretty strong muscles. — Shayne 1 min ago
#11871 Shayne (101 rep) | Q: How to tell an overweight person that the hike will be too hard? (score: 70) | posted 3 days ago by iFlo (454 rep) | edited 3 days ago by iFlo (454 rep)
This does not provide an answer to the question. Once you have sufficient reputation you will be able to comment on any post; instead, provide answers that don't require clarification from the asker. - From Review — avazula 20 secs ago
#12032 avazula (2641 rep) | A: How can I ask politely about someone's preferred gender pronouns? (score: 0) | posted 9 hours ago by Minerva (11 rep)
8:25 AM
+1 for postponing the discussion, but not the comfort, until the day after. I occasionally wake up from a dream confused at first (dreaming about standing up, getting ready for work getting on my was there... then waking up and realising I still have to do these things can do that!), and it actually takes a few minutes to sort this out. In the middle of the night, you both want to go back to sleep... not analyse the crazyness your brain just put you through! — Layna 1 min ago
#11989 Layna (720 rep) | A: I dreamed you did so and so. Why did you do that? - How to react? (score: 57) | posted 46 hours ago by LinuxBlanket (5139 rep) | edited 41 hours ago by LinuxBlanket (5139 rep)
And furthermore, even Freud’s granddaughter has disavowed most of his primitive theories. It’s all about neurology now. — user2497 43 secs ago
#11985 user2497 (99 rep) | A: I dreamed you did so and so. Why did you do that? - How to react? (score: 3) | posted 46 hours ago by OldPadawan (8522 rep) | edited 46 hours ago by OldPadawan (8522 rep)
I am not the downvoter, but I suspect it may be because this, at least to me, feels borderline creepy. You have someone who is not fully awake and emotionally vulnerable from a bad dream like that, and take that moment to engage in sex. One could argue that at this point, informed consent from her side is not possible! — Layna 1 min ago
#12042 Layna (720 rep) | A: I dreamed you did so and so. Why did you do that? - How to react? (score: -1) | posted 46 minutes ago by user2497 (99 rep) | edited 28 minutes ago by user2497 (99 rep)
@user2497 : I never said it was 100% accurate/true, as no one can tell, at the moment and level of knowledge humanity has, I gave a POV with a disclaimer (as I'm aware of what people say about Freud's theory). I just couldn't understand your 1st comment :) — OldPadawan 1 min ago
#11985 OldPadawan (8522 rep) | A: I dreamed you did so and so. Why did you do that? - How to react? (score: 3) | posted 47 hours ago by OldPadawan (8522 rep) | edited 46 hours ago by OldPadawan (8522 rep)
Personally, I would still be annoyed by the recurrence of it and I don't think it would prevent this from happening again since the trust issues are still here. — Hawker65 5 secs ago
#11989 Hawker65 (241 rep) | A: I dreamed you did so and so. Why did you do that? - How to react? (score: 57) | posted 46 hours ago by LinuxBlanket (5139 rep) | edited 42 hours ago by LinuxBlanket (5139 rep)
Hey, thanks for the answer! Can you please explain exactly why you think that this is a good idea? Why do you say to take this course of action? What’s the thought process behind this answer? As this currently stands, this is essentially a “Try this!” answer. We require that answers provide some sort of explanation for why they are suggesting this solution, and unfortunately, at the moment this answer doesn't appear to do that. — Arwen Undómiel 43 secs ago
#4970 Arwen Undómiel (1928 rep) | A: Appropriate ways to dismiss street vendors? (score: 0) | posted 165 days ago by Joe McMahon (839 rep)
Hey, thanks for the answer! Can you please explain exactly why you think that this is a good idea? Why do you say to take this course of action? What’s the thought process behind this answer? As this currently stands, this is essentially a “Try this!” answer. We require that answers provide some sort of explanation for why they are suggesting this solution, and unfortunately, at the moment this answer doesn't appear to do that. — Arwen Undómiel 21 secs ago
#1300 Arwen Undómiel (1927 rep) | A: How should one respond to trivial, obvious questions? (score: 2) | posted 227 days ago by Andy G (137 rep) | edited 227 days ago by Tom Au (5016 rep)
#11982 Hawker65 (241 rep) | Q: I dreamed you did so and so. Why did you do that? - How to react? (score: 28) | posted 48 hours ago by Edgar (1932 rep) | edited 44 hours ago by Crafter0800 (5044 rep)
Hey, thanks for the answer! Can you please explain exactly why you think that this is a good idea? Why do you say to take this course of action? What’s the thought process behind this answer? As this currently stands, this is essentially a “Try this!” answer. We require that answers provide some sort of explanation for why they are suggesting this solution, and unfortunately, at the moment this answer doesn't appear to do that. — Arwen Undómiel just now
#1839 Arwen Undómiel (1926 rep) | A: How to respond to someone when they ask how much you earn? (score: 6) | posted 215 days ago by WGroleau (486 rep)
#11985 user2497 (99 rep) | A: I dreamed you did so and so. Why did you do that? - How to react? (score: 3) | posted 47 hours ago by OldPadawan (8522 rep) | edited 46 hours ago by OldPadawan (8522 rep)
@Layna It’s not creepy, but preemptive action. I am not an evil rapist, I am a source of consolation in a world filled with tears. — user2497 31 secs ago
#12042 user2497 (99 rep) | A: I dreamed you did so and so. Why did you do that? - How to react? (score: -1) | posted 57 minutes ago by user2497 (99 rep) | edited 39 minutes ago by user2497 (99 rep)
Hey, thanks for the answer! Can you please explain exactly why you think that this is a good idea? Why do you say to take this course of action? What’s the thought process behind this answer? As this currently stands, this is essentially a “Try this!” answer. We require that answers provide some sort of explanation for why they are suggesting this solution, and unfortunately, at the moment this answer doesn't appear to do that. — Arwen Undómiel 1 min ago
#5400 Arwen Undómiel (1925 rep) | A: When to open a gift / present given in person (score: 0) | posted 154 days ago by Joel Harkes (1118 rep)
@Layna Oh ... consent. Well, there is consent. Don’t you #metoo me. Trivia: it is quite impossible to rape any woman who is not sexually aroused - at least without the use of lubricants. I can’t talk any more about this, or anongoodnurse will chastise me again. — user2497 48 secs ago
#12042 user2497 (97 rep) | A: I dreamed you did so and so. Why did you do that? - How to react? (score: -2) | posted 1 hours ago by user2497 (97 rep) | edited 5 minutes ago by user2497 (97 rep)
@user2497 Actually I agree with you with all your comments to other answers, including this one. It's just a perspective, that might be useful if something bad happens by following other answers. Nobody is going to believe it otherwise I think. But after reading your answer, I began to doubt what you mean by "fact". ("factually correct" isn't a stronger phrase than "correct", which every answerer has assumed.) Did you learn that from some real cognitive science? I'm interested in how to get started on that, as there are many "wrong" branches. But you might be reinterpreting/redefining things. — user23013 1 min ago
#12018 user23013 (111 rep) | A: I dreamed you did so and so. Why did you do that? - How to react? (score: 0) | posted 15 hours ago by user23013 (111 rep)
Hey, thanks for the answer! Can you please explain exactly why you think that this is a good idea? Why do you say to take this course of action? What’s the thought process behind this answer? As this currently stands, this is essentially a “Try this!” answer. We require that answers provide some sort of explanation for why they are suggesting this solution, and unfortunately, at the moment this answer doesn't appear to do that. — Arwen Undómiel 1 min ago
#1200 Arwen Undómiel (1924 rep) | A: It's my birthday! How do I tell people who don't know, who might want to know, without being awkward? (score: 0) | posted 229 days ago by Vincent (117 rep)
Hey, thanks for the answer! Can you please explain exactly why you think that this is a good idea? Why do you say to take this course of action? What’s the thought process behind this answer? As this currently stands, this is essentially a “Try this!” answer. We require that answers provide some sort of explanation for why they are suggesting this solution, and unfortunately, at the moment this answer doesn't appear to do that. — Arwen Undómiel 1 min ago
#38 Arwen Undómiel (1923 rep) | A: When should I use Mrs. or Ms. in emails? (score: 4) | posted 264 days ago by Joe S (3171 rep)
Terrific answer! This teaches so much about how to handle a partner in general! I've made the mistake of invalidating my ex partners feelings when they were not logical. I might have been in the "right" but it never turned out well. THIS is the way to go for a healthy relationship. :) — MansNotHot 1 min ago
#11989 MansNotHot (1374 rep) | A: I dreamed you did so and so. Why did you do that? - How to react? (score: 60) | posted 46 hours ago by LinuxBlanket (5169 rep) | edited 42 hours ago by LinuxBlanket (5169 rep)
If you are willing to go a little bold road, there are fun gym clothes with "witty" stuff like " My weight is not your concern." or similar things written on it. I guess the problem you face is not too uncommon. — skymningen 56 secs ago
#12002 skymningen (557 rep) | Q: How can I respond to well-meaning comments at the gym? (score: 10) | posted 36 hours ago by Ash (449 rep) | edited 31 hours ago by Ash (449 rep) | Has magic comment
Related; not sure about duplicate: How to refuse someone asking for additional help “while you're at it”? — A J 36 secs ago
#12043 A J (5360 rep) | Q: Politely refuse to help someone? (score: 0) | posted 4 minutes ago by user8979192 (1 rep)
Actually, no. If you "keep away and bring up later" stuff repeatedly, that can be a major anxiety trigger for them. They will start to assume all the time that you are going to lie and only tell the truth later. As you said, timing is key in communicating with people with anxiety, but any delay is often making things worse for them (giving them time to speculate and iterate what has and hasn't been said(. — skymningen 51 secs ago
#11845 skymningen (557 rep) | A: How to inform a friend who has anxiety that you don't dislike them (score: 6) | posted 3 days ago by momo545 (61 rep)
Social pressure: this one is the worst, as demonstrated by WoW zombies. If you can't be there for that 5 hour raid, your friends will hold a grudge! That one is wrong. On my own experience, your friend will hold you a grudge only if you did say that would be there. Because this is something were a fixed number of people need to be there or you just can't go, so by not coming, you may have wasted the time that everyone free from their agenda for that. So yeah they'll hold a grudge, well deserved. Nothing to do with addiction, that's plain respect. — Walfrat just now
#11864 Walfrat (276 rep) | A: My fiancée is addicted to a "free-to-play" (pay-to-win) game (score: 119) | posted 3 days ago by peufeu (9626 rep) | edited 38 hours ago by peufeu (9626 rep)
As a pubescent nerd, I read books about psychology and anatomy. Bad to leave matters of the heart to chance. I recommend I. P. Pavlov (No, I don’t think his experiments were cool, but he was pioneering the field) and Konrad Lorenz, as well as Noam Chomsky. Have a look at cognitive neuroscience as well. The name of the ‘founder’ of modern cognitive psychology eludes me ATM, but google will help. His big book was very good. Insight does not make you a fraudulent partner, and if women are locks, then men must be keys. — user2497 1 min ago
#12018 user2497 (91 rep) | A: I dreamed you did so and so. Why did you do that? - How to react? (score: 0) | posted 16 hours ago by user23013 (111 rep)
9:35 AM
Oh... in your relationships, do not discuss the security protocols of the female psyche at all... Only let your partner know that you understand her, and what you understand. Look at my negative score of -5... I can only assume this is because I reduce the magical love and unicorn dreams to what they are. ‘Beta’ and ‘omega’ men are observant to female opinions, and no variant of female likes a dissection of love. In fact, one comment suggested I was a borderline rapist :,( — user2497 just now
#12018 user2497 (91 rep) | A: I dreamed you did so and so. Why did you do that? - How to react? (score: 0) | posted 16 hours ago by user23013 (111 rep)
This does not provide an answer to the question. To critique or request clarification from an author, leave a comment below their post. - From Review — avazula 1 min ago
#5400 avazula (2661 rep) | A: When to open a gift / present given in person (score: -1) | posted 154 days ago by Joel Harkes (1116 rep)
The "somewhat tubby" can be pretty remorseless hikers, resistant to cold and lots of energy on board, they can deliver a walking pace for hours upon hours. — Grimm The Opiner 19 secs ago
#11871 Grimm The Opiner (149 rep) | Q: How to tell an overweight person that the hike will be too hard? (score: 71) | posted 3 days ago by iFlo (459 rep) | edited 3 days ago by iFlo (459 rep)
#12045 Lawrence (169 rep) | A: Politely refuse to help someone? (score: 2) | posted 15 minutes ago by Ahsan9981 (21 rep)
Hey, thanks for the answer! Can you please explain exactly why you think that this is a good idea? Why do you say to take this course of action? What’s the thought process behind this answer? As this currently stands, this is essentially a “Try this!” answer. We require that answers provide some sort of explanation for why they are suggesting this solution, and unfortunately, at the moment this answer doesn't appear to do that. — Arwen Undómiel 50 secs ago
#3377 Arwen Undómiel (1922 rep) | A: Asking someone "What's the worst thing that's ever happened to you"? (score: 2) | posted 194 days ago by Martín Basterrechea (145 rep)
Summarizing a bit: This game has filled a void in her life. Curing her from the addiction to this game without figuring out what is this void (and filling it with something more sustainable) might only drive her into a different coping behavior. — skymningen 31 secs ago
#11889 skymningen (557 rep) | A: My fiancée is addicted to a "free-to-play" (pay-to-win) game (score: 70) | posted 3 days ago by Jhal (649 rep)
I didn't downvote, and didn't care too much about the feminism or consent thing. But that part is hardly necessary, applicable everywhere or important enough to justify off topic defences. Whatever the case is for you, trying to replicate that would probably imply some sort of all-or-nothing (science-or-manipulative), in other words, ignorant result, which isn't too helpful. The idea about dream is probably not too far, but the interpretation is like saying only the last piece of food makes you full, breathing is critical for any success, and the image on the banknote makes people feel rich. — user23013 1 min ago
#12042 user23013 (111 rep) | A: I dreamed you did so and so. Why did you do that? - How to react? (score: -5) | posted 2 hours ago by user2497 (91 rep) | edited 57 minutes ago by user2497 (91 rep)
@user23013 Applied science to console someone you love is ignorant? Well, I guess I should have told her to shut up. Funny how manipulation is a bad word, let’s just say controlling the direction of a situation. And the end goal was consolation. The ‘idea about the dream’ is available in numerous online documents, google. Embrace objective truths, not your emotions. That’s how Anakin became Darth Vader. Pwned. — user2497 1 min ago
#12042 user2497 (89 rep) | A: I dreamed you did so and so. Why did you do that? - How to react? (score: -6) | posted 2 hours ago by user2497 (89 rep) | edited 1 hours ago by user2497 (89 rep)
You seem to enjoy rational discourse, as you for instance refer to evolution in your argument. I like that. But downvoting is Stack Exchange variant of providiing freedom of expression. And someone else downvoting is NOT stifling YOUR freedom at all. Also your trivia about rape is not very well thought out. Your argument about arousal seems to imply that women cannot experience arousal during rape. This is the typical intuition, but it is nonsens, it would make little evolutionary sense: digest.bps.org.uk/2011/01/11/… — Bart 1 min ago
#12042 Bart (101 rep) | A: I dreamed you did so and so. Why did you do that? - How to react? (score: -8) | posted 2 hours ago by user2497 (85 rep) | edited 1 hours ago by user2497 (85 rep)
I like this answer a lot, it definitely seems like the most probable to be successful. The only thing is the “set up” can take time, i.e., discussing my personality, my friends, etc, but definitely worth it if it resolves the issue. Thank you. (PS: I’m a linux fan too.) — user1997744 31 secs ago
#11979 user1997744 (151 rep) | A: Communicating my (one-sided) exclusivity without pressuring (score: 3) | posted 57 hours ago by LinuxBlanket (5194 rep) | edited 54 hours ago by LinuxBlanket (5194 rep)
@avazula 'you could frame the question as one you are required to ask and make sure that you ask everybody' and 'word the question to better fit your own situation and goals' seem as though they answer 'How can I ask someone what their preferred gender pronoun is without offending them?' so i'm finding your comment confusing. — Spagirl 46 secs ago
#12032 Spagirl (8486 rep) | A: How can I ask politely about someone's preferred gender pronouns? (score: 0) | posted 11 hours ago by Minerva (11 rep)
Just a note: I am quiet sure I didn't #meToo anyone because I would be just as disturbed by this behaviour if you where female and the dreamer male! Bart noted my main scientific issue, my second would be that personally I don't count arousal as consent. And last but not least: "I am not en evil rapist" is a REALLY triggering note to leave, because it implies there are good rapists! — Layna 43 secs ago
#12042 Layna (719 rep) | A: I dreamed you did so and so. Why did you do that? - How to react? (score: -8) | posted 2 hours ago by user2497 (85 rep) | edited 1 hours ago by user2497 (85 rep)
Just for clarification. Are you going to question everyone's pronouns, or only of those of who you have doubts? If you suggest I would like to be called anything else than a 'man' I'd assume you're making fun of me. — Geliormth 56 secs ago
#1536 Geliormth (2482 rep) | Q: How can I ask politely about someone's preferred gender pronouns? (score: 15) | posted 221 days ago by Anoplexian (1405 rep) | edited 221 days ago by Catija (10237 rep)
@Bart It was SUPER-relevant to mention that rape is non-trivial (without lubrication), since I was being #metoo’ed. I really found your link informative, thanks! Chimps... who could have thought this experiment up? However, there is not one of the listed stimuli in our bedroom. Now, what causes arousal then? Only me and my penis. — user2497 36 secs ago
#12042 user2497 (85 rep) | A: I dreamed you did so and so. Why did you do that? - How to react? (score: -8) | posted 2 hours ago by user2497 (85 rep) | edited 1 hours ago by user2497 (85 rep)
#12042 user2497 (85 rep) | A: I dreamed you did so and so. Why did you do that? - How to react? (score: -8) | posted 2 hours ago by user2497 (85 rep) | edited 1 hours ago by user2497 (85 rep)
#11853 henning (3636 rep) | Q: My fiancée is addicted to a "free-to-play" (pay-to-win) game (score: 84) | posted 3 days ago by Fez Vrasta (527 rep) | edited 2 days ago by HDE 226868 (6100 rep)
#12042 user23013 (109 rep) | A: I dreamed you did so and so. Why did you do that? - How to react? (score: -8) | posted 2 hours ago by user2497 (85 rep) | edited 1 hours ago by user2497 (85 rep)
#1839 Spagirl (8486 rep) | A: How to respond to someone when they ask how much you earn? (score: 4) | posted 215 days ago by WGroleau (482 rep)
In no sport is it appropriate to go straight for one of the most difficult challenges that sport provides from no experience. A willingness to encourage them and be supportive in them getting into the sport are different from being blatantly negligent in not setting realistic expectations. Your attitude would only get people hurt. In some sports that might be tennis elbow or a broken bone. In scrambling/hiking/climbing, it could be death. — AHamilton 1 min ago
#11999 AHamilton (631 rep) | A: How to tell an overweight person that the hike will be too hard? (score: -2) | posted 38 hours ago by Bread (227 rep)
"Whatever the case is for you, trying to replicate that would probably..." I mean whatever it is in your case, it doesn't tell how not to be ignorant. The manipulation is not bad part... I can't help much now. But let me invent a new word for that, "ill-controlling" in contrast to "scientifically controlling", and both in contrast to "communication", just in case. — user23013 1 min ago
#12042 user23013 (109 rep) | A: I dreamed you did so and so. Why did you do that? - How to react? (score: -8) | posted 2 hours ago by user2497 (85 rep) | edited 1 hours ago by user2497 (85 rep)
@user2497 I didn't start thinking about this for a relationship. So I started with "this may not apply..." My answer indeed discourages dissection of this exact matter (openly or in a way relevant to one's own life) whether it is love or not. (Saved and will look up their books when I have enough time. But apparently there are too many.) — user23013 1 min ago
#12018 user23013 (109 rep) | A: I dreamed you did so and so. Why did you do that? - How to react? (score: -1) | posted 17 hours ago by user23013 (109 rep)
#12042 user2497 (85 rep) | A: I dreamed you did so and so. Why did you do that? - How to react? (score: -8) | posted 2 hours ago by user2497 (85 rep) | edited 1 hours ago by user2497 (85 rep)
#11747 hg8 (101 rep) | A: How do I answer the question "why are you vegan?" honestly, without making them resent me? (score: 117) | posted 5 days ago by Dan Anderson (6122 rep) | edited 3 days ago by Community (1 rep)
11:12 AM
#11989 Agent_L (646 rep) | A: I dreamed you did so and so. Why did you do that? - How to react? (score: 72) | posted 48 hours ago by LinuxBlanket (5192 rep) | edited 44 hours ago by LinuxBlanket (5192 rep)
#11986 Agent_L (646 rep) | A: I dreamed you did so and so. Why did you do that? - How to react? (score: 9) | posted 49 hours ago by FreeElk (446 rep)
I had been unable to find especially Konrad Lorenz’ books in hardcopy, however google->books search has many results on e.g. amazon. — user2497 42 secs ago
#12018 user2497 (85 rep) | A: I dreamed you did so and so. Why did you do that? - How to react? (score: -1) | posted 18 hours ago by user23013 (109 rep)
@gnasher729 Depends on the culture, in this case we're talking about Italy so I think that's not unheard of. Also unless it's buried in a comment somewhere, it's not stated at what age the siblings moved out, just how old they are now. — thanby 25 secs ago
#11689 thanby (349 rep) | A: How to handle my girlfriend's parents' attitude to asking her for money? (score: 73) | posted 6 days ago by AndreiROM (14174 rep) | edited 6 days ago by peufeu (9664 rep)
Yes. Don't address the overweight, it's merely a symptom. Address core issues: stamina, experience and track record. — Agent_L 35 secs ago
#11905 Agent_L (646 rep) | A: How to tell an overweight person that the hike will be too hard? (score: 40) | posted 3 days ago by Adam Davis (2530 rep) | edited 12 hours ago by ArtOfCode (1967 rep)
11:55 AM
It seems pretty apparent that there is a reason why the other person dreamed this: because they are (consciously or sub-consciously) afraid that it's the truth. Does simply reassuring her not work? — Cronax 14 secs ago
#11982 Cronax (1234 rep) | Q: I dreamed you did so and so. Why did you do that? - How to react? (score: 37) | posted 51 hours ago by Edgar (1996 rep) | edited 48 hours ago by Crafter0800 (5044 rep)
Another thing that gets affected by age is the body's ability to produce serotonin. Serotonin is what allows us to feel contented, calm and happy. Coupled with reasons to be unhappy (memory loss, hearing loss etc., like you mention), it is easy to see why an elderly person would feel unhappy and misunderstood, in a situation where such attitude appears "unreasonable" and "disruptive". — Galastel 1 min ago
#12041 Galastel (373 rep) | A: How to convince a family member to stop victimizing themselves? (score: 4) | posted 6 hours ago by Lawrence (189 rep)
Or people may just vote down because they don't think this is a good way to handle the situation, regardless of how well it may work for you. — SQB 49 secs ago
#12042 SQB (3359 rep) | A: I dreamed you did so and so. Why did you do that? - How to react? (score: -9) | posted 4 hours ago by user2497 (91 rep) | edited 3 hours ago by user2497 (91 rep)
@Agent_L in a perfect world, everybody knows how to handle feelings perfectly and how to sort their reactions to the right target. This is not the world we live in. Not every person that doesn't know how to do it is an abuser. In that moment (the middle of the night) she feels threatened, insecure, sad. If the OP counteracts by accusing her, now what? Does she stop feeling that way? Does she tell him "oh yeah, you're right, I was being irrational"? I highly doubt it. — LinuxBlanket 56 secs ago
#11989 LinuxBlanket (5194 rep) | A: I dreamed you did so and so. Why did you do that? - How to react? (score: 73) | posted 49 hours ago by LinuxBlanket (5194 rep) | edited 45 hours ago by LinuxBlanket (5194 rep)
Battling this exact same issue for years, I can't upvote this answer enough. I actually went through RS and WoW at two different points in my life. It's not about the game; the game addiction is the result of something else. — iDriveSidewayz 48 secs ago
#11889 iDriveSidewayz (101 rep) | A: My fiancée is addicted to a "free-to-play" (pay-to-win) game (score: 72) | posted 3 days ago by Jhal (669 rep)
@Galastel Oh dear. Well, that's one more reason to treat the older generation well - it sets the reference for the younger generation to follow when the current generation becomes, in time, the cranky older generation. It also serves as a reminder to work on making some 'good old days' now. — Lawrence 1 min ago
#12041 Lawrence (189 rep) | A: How to convince a family member to stop victimizing themselves? (score: 4) | posted 6 hours ago by Lawrence (189 rep)
#12041 Lawrence (189 rep) | A: How to convince a family member to stop victimizing themselves? (score: 4) | posted 6 hours ago by Lawrence (189 rep)
12:26 PM
#12041 Galastel (373 rep) | A: How to convince a family member to stop victimizing themselves? (score: 4) | posted 6 hours ago by Lawrence (189 rep)
#12055 FiatLux (1 rep) | A: How can I ask politely about someone's preferred gender pronouns? (score: -3) | posted 26 minutes ago by FiatLux (1 rep)
#11203 Tom (3063 rep) | Q: Re-Marriage of my father to her ex-Wife A-K-A my step mom (score: -3) | posted 18 days ago by Ahsan9981 (61 rep) | edited 17 days ago by Ahsan9981 (61 rep)
#12041 Lawrence (189 rep) | A: How to convince a family member to stop victimizing themselves? (score: 4) | posted 6 hours ago by Lawrence (189 rep)
I didn't downvote or mark for deletion, but I think the reason people did is because this doesn't answer the question. It's okay to provide an alternate solution, but you need to do a better job of explaining a) why the OP shouldn't do what he's asking, and b) why your solution is better from an interpersonal point of view. — F1Krazy 7 secs ago
#12055 F1Krazy (103 rep) | A: How can I ask politely about someone's preferred gender pronouns? (score: -3) | posted 35 minutes ago by FiatLux (1 rep)
@Magisch SOME get deleted. Some stay. This is especially evident when one flags rude comments only to see those flags rejected. — Richard U 10 secs ago
#2634 Richard U (6115 rep) | Q: How do we engage more people to contribute on meta, to create a wider mandate for our policies? (score: 8) | posted 3 days ago by JAD (3510 rep) | edited 2 days ago by JAD (3510 rep)
Strongly depends on the setting. If it's high school, they will most likely not care as they just dont want to work hard. If it's university it might work as they are most likely there to learn something. — MansNotHot 1 min ago
#12044 MansNotHot (1374 rep) | A: Politely refuse to help someone? (score: 1) | posted 3 hours ago by skymningen (567 rep)
It's their problem if they want to learn the lesson or not. The question was about a polite way to get this to stop. Even primary school students will stop putting in the effort to ask when they realize it is not getting them what they want any more. — skymningen 1 min ago
#12044 skymningen (567 rep) | A: Politely refuse to help someone? (score: 1) | posted 3 hours ago by skymningen (567 rep)
No what i mean is, if you tell someone that it's for their own good, they wont listen and continue pestering. At least this is how it was in my schooltime. Noone will easily stop pestering if he needs the homework till next class and has no time to properly finish it, for example — MansNotHot 19 secs ago
#12044 MansNotHot (1374 rep) | A: Politely refuse to help someone? (score: 1) | posted 3 hours ago by skymningen (567 rep)
How does this topic come up? Maybe the fear of early attachment stems from the fact that you emphasize talking about your exclusivity? Couldn't you just adhere to the standards you have set for yourself without explicitly bringing the topic up? Or is dating only one person so uncommon in your community that it is some kind of "red flag"? I am not being judgemental, I just have no experience with that particular community. I would have thought that if "open" relationships are the norm in a community, discussing exclusivity would not be a fairly common "early dating" topic anyway. — skymningen 1 min ago
#11973 skymningen (567 rep) | Q: Communicating my (one-sided) exclusivity without pressuring (score: 4) | posted 2 days ago by user1997744 (151 rep) | edited 49 hours ago by Crafter0800 (5044 rep)
@skymningen: it is very popular for men in London to expect unprotected intimacy on PrEP, but for me that is something I’d only do when a person was exclusive. That’s one example how it sparks the discussion. — user1997744 25 secs ago
#11973 user1997744 (151 rep) | Q: Communicating my (one-sided) exclusivity without pressuring (score: 4) | posted 2 days ago by user1997744 (151 rep) | edited 49 hours ago by Crafter0800 (5044 rep)
There is, of course, some time where you would need to "sit through it" and endure some pestering. People very rarely change in an instant. — skymningen 5 secs ago
#12044 skymningen (567 rep) | A: Politely refuse to help someone? (score: 1) | posted 3 hours ago by skymningen (567 rep)
Agreed. And did not mean that this is a bad answer. Just wanted to note that the intelligent way might not work for some kids. — MansNotHot 1 min ago
#12044 MansNotHot (1374 rep) | A: Politely refuse to help someone? (score: 1) | posted 3 hours ago by skymningen (567 rep)
From what I heard, I wouldn't take GR20 without some preliminary training. You need some training for all your party, even the seemingly fit members. — yu_sha 27 secs ago
#11873 yu_sha (101 rep) | A: How to tell an overweight person that the hike will be too hard? (score: 132) | posted 3 days ago by HDE 226868 (6130 rep) | edited 3 days ago by Catija (10237 rep)
I guess then this unusual request is what makes them feel pressured into exclusivity, not your statement of being exclusive yourself. Your expectations do not match up. While that is not a pressure you put on them, it is definitely a point for them to consider themselves. I have had friends jokingly have called me a "serial monogamist". Maybe if you put this out with some humor attached that could make the situation less pressurizing? It kind of has the connotation of "will move on (if necessary)" (serial) but also "exclusive" (monogamist). — skymningen 1 min ago
#11973 skymningen (567 rep) | Q: Communicating my (one-sided) exclusivity without pressuring (score: 4) | posted 2 days ago by user1997744 (151 rep) | edited 49 hours ago by Crafter0800 (5044 rep)
Okay, then the best advice would be: tell her she's too overweight and out of shape to handle it. Let her know in no uncertain terms, that you think she's too dense to figure that out on her own. Because you would only be doing her a favor, by being blunt and forthright. Thinking and deciding for people who presumably can't think for themselves, is what IPS is about, apparently. — Bread 30 secs ago
#11999 Bread (227 rep) | A: How to tell an overweight person that the hike will be too hard? (score: -2) | posted 40 hours ago by Bread (227 rep)
Seriously? The fact that her granddaughter gets attacked by a dog and she doesn't even think to ask if she is okay tells volumes. — Bjarke Freund-Hansen 1 min ago
#12050 Bjarke Freund-Hansen (101 rep) | A: How to convince a family member to stop victimizing themselves? (score: 1) | posted 2 hours ago by Sandy C (320 rep)
Why the answer is great, the constant use of bold fonts is hard on the eyes, plus also at least I am perfectly able to read the text and identify the important parts of it myself. Using some more restrained italics for emphasis is generally more than enough if you really have a very important part to make stand out. — AnoE 1 min ago
#11989 AnoE (1842 rep) | A: I dreamed you did so and so. Why did you do that? - How to react? (score: 77) | posted 50 hours ago by LinuxBlanket (5194 rep) | edited 46 hours ago by LinuxBlanket (5194 rep)
I haven't voted on this either, but will now down-vote because it specifically fails to address this part of the question ' It's an issue when I need their preferred gender for filling out forms for them and such' which is clearly a situation where the OP is not in control of what information is required to complete the forms. — Spagirl just now
#12055 Spagirl (8496 rep) | A: How can I ask politely about someone's preferred gender pronouns? (score: -3) | posted 1 hours ago by FiatLux (1 rep)
#12050 Sandy C (320 rep) | A: How to convince a family member to stop victimizing themselves? (score: 1) | posted 2 hours ago by Sandy C (320 rep)
#12053 Daniel (1573 rep) | A: Saying no to frequent but trivial favors (score: -1) | posted 1 hours ago by Sandy C (318 rep)
"Free to play (ie, pay to win) mobile games work on a completely different paradigm. They are designed to create addiction in order to turn the player into a cash cow." This is usually false. The true cash cows are the so-called 'whales', who spend a massive amount of cash on a single game, but often having a rather healthy amount of time (some even leave the game for months until there is new content and swiftly buy everything that's loose) An example of a whale is someone who rapidly spent thousands of Yen to get a 'perfect team' of his favorite character in the game 'Fire Emblem Heroes'. — Discrete lizard 1 min ago
#11864 Discrete lizard (101 rep) | A: My fiancée is addicted to a "free-to-play" (pay-to-win) game (score: 125) | posted 4 days ago by peufeu (9722 rep) | edited 42 hours ago by peufeu (9722 rep)
Put a "No, Thank you" before the "I'm comfy, I don't want to move." and I think that´s about as nice as you can get in these circumstances. — Daniel 12 secs ago
#12052 Daniel (1573 rep) | A: Saying no to frequent but trivial favors (score: 1) | posted 2 hours ago by Astralbee (8159 rep) | edited 2 hours ago by Astralbee (8159 rep)
This answer is spot on. I would take less words: @Seb693 You need to take a good look at your own behavior, especially where your words do not correspond with your actions: I don’t think it would be a good fit long term versus dragging this out. I said I thought it would be okay with me: note the 'I thought' where you try to avoid a straight answer. You are out-of-integrity here and need to clean up the negative things you are putting into the relationships. — Jan Doggen 37 secs ago
#8914 Jan Doggen (197 rep) | A: Roommate dating man I have a crush on (score: 6) | posted 69 days ago by Spagirl (8496 rep)
Can you add a location tag? There is probably a cultural aspect to this that we'd want to not miss. — baldPrussian 1 min ago
#12043 baldPrussian (9167 rep) | Q: Politely refuse to help someone? (score: 5) | posted 4 hours ago by user8979192 (26 rep)
Still, this doesn't mean the games aren't designed to create addiction as most clearly are. However, not all (even 'microtransaction based' games) are like this. Some see that they have a big responsibility for the health of their users and act accordingly. There are examples of this in 'non microtransaction' games. For instance, most recent games produced by Nintendo explicitly encourage (some say nag) the user to take breaks in game! (this works better for pay to play games, as not beating the game too fast can improve the playing experience) However, I hope the 'micro-based's follow. — Discrete lizard 1 min ago
#11864 Discrete lizard (101 rep) | A: My fiancée is addicted to a "free-to-play" (pay-to-win) game (score: 125) | posted 4 days ago by peufeu (9724 rep) | edited 43 hours ago by peufeu (9724 rep)
@AnoE and to think I tried to limit the amount of bold :D I'll format it better, thanks for the feedback! — LinuxBlanket 43 secs ago
#11989 LinuxBlanket (5194 rep) | A: I dreamed you did so and so. Why did you do that? - How to react? (score: 78) | posted 51 hours ago by LinuxBlanket (5194 rep) | edited 46 hours ago by LinuxBlanket (5194 rep)
In a sense, relying on 'whales' is a far more sustainable business model than relying on creating addiction: the major cash cows 'sponsor' the game for the other players, while maintaining the ability to have healthy lives. Sure, there's the semi-gambling problem, but I think this an improvement, at least. In particular, as the whales only pay when new content is provided (oh and they will be happy to pay, when they have the cash, at least) this promotes the further development of the game, which again makes all other players happy. In the end, a service is offered where paying benefits. — Discrete lizard 57 secs ago
#11864 Discrete lizard (101 rep) | A: My fiancée is addicted to a "free-to-play" (pay-to-win) game (score: 126) | posted 4 days ago by peufeu (9728 rep) | edited 43 hours ago by peufeu (9728 rep)
('meta' note, if I have the time to source my claims, I might consider answering. If I can gain the rep somewhere else first, I guess) — Discrete lizard 48 secs ago
#11864 Discrete lizard (101 rep) | A: My fiancée is addicted to a "free-to-play" (pay-to-win) game (score: 126) | posted 4 days ago by peufeu (9728 rep) | edited 43 hours ago by peufeu (9728 rep)
@Daniel Not saying you're wrong, but that was the optional, extra-soft approach and deliberately avoids directly saying "no". I suggested a second option too. — Astralbee 17 secs ago
@Daniel Not saying you're wrong, but that was the optional, extra-soft approach and deliberately avoids directly saying "no". I suggested a second option too. — Astralbee 19 secs ago
#12052 Astralbee (8169 rep) | A: Saying no to frequent but trivial favors (score: 2) | posted 2 hours ago by Astralbee (8169 rep) | edited 2 hours ago by Astralbee (8169 rep)
Ok, then there may be a third approach, between the not-saying-no-but-really-dont-want-to and your second option which I find has the potential to be perceived quite rude if you don´t quite nail the tone. By saying "thank you, but no" you acknowledge the request but opt out in a clear and direct manner. — Daniel 17 secs ago
#12052 Daniel (1573 rep) | A: Saying no to frequent but trivial favors (score: 3) | posted 2 hours ago by Astralbee (8179 rep) | edited 2 hours ago by Astralbee (8179 rep)
#11873 flith (101 rep) | A: How to tell an overweight person that the hike will be too hard? (score: 132) | posted 3 days ago by HDE 226868 (6130 rep) | edited 3 days ago by Catija (10237 rep)
@Discretelizard interesting. This link mentions only 4% of users actually pay for Candy Crush, so you would be right. However, in order to reel in the whales, they have to make the game addictive for everyone. This stat does tell that 96% of players are reasonable enough not to pay, but it doesn't tell how many of them lose some social life as OP's GF... that's like collateral damage. — peufeu 31 secs ago
#11864 peufeu (9726 rep) | A: My fiancée is addicted to a "free-to-play" (pay-to-win) game (score: 125) | posted 4 days ago by peufeu (9726 rep) | edited 43 hours ago by peufeu (9726 rep)
It's not that these are bad solutions, but you're thrusting the OP into the role of academic coach for these other people. Sometimes, when you've done your work, you just want to be left alone, not help others get their stuff done. — AndreiROM 29 secs ago
#12047 AndreiROM (14184 rep) | A: Politely refuse to help someone? (score: 7) | posted 3 hours ago by Sandy C (328 rep)
perhaps you should tell us the issue with simply correcting people in the first place. would give us a better idea of a good answer. — tuskiomi 51 secs ago
#10756 tuskiomi (424 rep) | Q: How to politely notify in an online conversation that I am a woman? (score: 112) | posted 26 days ago by Trabool (635 rep) | edited 25 days ago by AmagicalFishy (133 rep) | Has magic comment
@AndreiROM Yes, I do agree that we want to be left alone sometimes. Unless the OP devices his own techniques to keep people at bay, a blunt no will always sound rude. Once delegation comes into the picture, gradually people would understand how requesting for help with the OP works. This won't happen overnight. But, it would work. — Sandy C 28 secs ago
#12047 Sandy C (328 rep) | A: Politely refuse to help someone? (score: 7) | posted 3 hours ago by Sandy C (328 rep)
@peufeu I dispute your claim that for a company to real in the cash from 'whales' it is nessecary to make the game addictive. No more addictive than normal video games, at least. I'm fully aware that companies do this, but I think that is dishonest and eventually unsustainable business model that can be replaced with both more honest, sustainable and effective methods. — Discrete lizard 56 secs ago
#11864 Discrete lizard (101 rep) | A: My fiancée is addicted to a "free-to-play" (pay-to-win) game (score: 125) | posted 4 days ago by peufeu (9728 rep) | edited 43 hours ago by peufeu (9728 rep)
It is unfortunate that the law is too slow to deal with such 'innovation', but this sounds like a good opportunity for a country to prevent or at least discourage citizens from addiction, as similarly happens in some countries with smoking and other drugs. But this is getting off-topic a bit. — Discrete lizard 1 min ago
#11864 Discrete lizard (101 rep) | A: My fiancée is addicted to a "free-to-play" (pay-to-win) game (score: 125) | posted 4 days ago by peufeu (9728 rep) | edited 43 hours ago by peufeu (9728 rep)
#12006 cHao (1007 rep) | Q: How can I convince my SO that $1000 per night is too much for a hotel? (score: 10) | posted 34 hours ago by Chaotic (279 rep) | edited 23 hours ago by Kate Gregory (15565 rep)
@user1997744 glad it helped! Yes, it can take time, take this time for yourself. Also, by the answers you receive you can discover many things about your partner that can enhance your relationship. — LinuxBlanket 1 min ago
#11979 LinuxBlanket (5194 rep) | A: Communicating my (one-sided) exclusivity without pressuring (score: 3) | posted 2 days ago by LinuxBlanket (5194 rep) | edited 58 hours ago by LinuxBlanket (5194 rep)
#12053 Sandy C (328 rep) | A: Saying no to frequent but trivial favors (score: -1) | posted 2 hours ago by Sandy C (328 rep)
Nice response for OP to create a positive platform, but please consider whether it addresses this part of OP's goal: "How can I express to people that this sort of stuff isn't welcome, or otherwise avoid the trap of "accepting" compliments that kinda make me feel awkward and uncomfortable" -- I wonder whether your suggested reply would clearly convey to the person that such untrue compliments are unwelcome? — English Student 1 min ago
#12017 English Student (7499 rep) | A: How can I respond to well-meaning comments at the gym? (score: 5) | posted 22 hours ago by Dave Keene (59 rep)
2:30 PM
@Ash Theres a difference between muscle weight and fat. If it would be all muscle weight, OP wouldn't ask the question, why are you feeling that offended? — Xatenev 36 secs ago
#11871 Xatenev (101 rep) | Q: How to tell an overweight person that the hike will be too hard? (score: 76) | posted 3 days ago by iFlo (484 rep) | edited 3 days ago by iFlo (484 rep)
@Daniel There are surely more than three approaches, but I'm happy keeping my answer succinct. — Astralbee 49 secs ago
#12052 Astralbee (8189 rep) | A: Saying no to frequent but trivial favors (score: 3) | posted 3 hours ago by Astralbee (8189 rep) | edited 2 minutes ago by Astralbee (8189 rep)
#3377 Martín Basterrechea (145 rep) | A: Asking someone "What's the worst thing that's ever happened to you"? (score: 2) | posted 194 days ago by Martín Basterrechea (145 rep) | edited 1 minutes ago by Martín Basterrechea (145 rep)
This happened at my school ("I'll change the wording and fonts!") and a bunch of people in my chemistry class got called out for cheating on their GCSE coursework. They were given a chance to do it again but could have been thrown off all of their courses. It's cheating - don't risk it. — WhatEvil 16 secs ago
#12043 WhatEvil (331 rep) | Q: Politely refuse to help someone? (score: 6) | posted 5 hours ago by user8979192 (31 rep)
@Nobody There's no such thing in life as moral obligation, there's just free will. You want to believe in theese things, then admit it and act like it. Don't hide behind the moral principles you believe in to be judgemental. — Rolexel 15 secs ago
#11783 Rolexel (550 rep) | A: My morals make me "better" than the next person. How not to be judgmental? (score: 0) | posted 5 days ago by Kozaky (594 rep)
3:11 PM
@flith I'm not sure "self-delusional" is the word. Until she's done some serious walking, she may simply not know how hard it's going to be, and what always gets you is the unknown unknowns. If it's presented as "we've been doing this all our lives, and we're doing a dry run", it's less likely to end with disagreement from a novice. — Graham 1 min ago
#11873 Graham (659 rep) | A: How to tell an overweight person that the hike will be too hard? (score: 134) | posted 4 days ago by HDE 226868 (6150 rep) | edited 3 days ago by Catija (10237 rep)
3:24 PM
Extremely simple (as befits your username) yet powerful option @Simpleton: I appreciate and upvote! Maybe OP could add for greater credibility, "serious allegation [...] by an alleged victim who's not willing to file a complaint and wishes to remain anonymous in this matter." — English Student 1 min ago
#11530 English Student (7499 rep) | A: How can I tell my friend her boyfriend is (allegedly) a rapist? (score: 13) | posted 12 days ago by Simpleton (262 rep) | edited 12 days ago by Em C (5905 rep)
3:37 PM
I would perceive all three reactions as variants of passive-aggressive. But I don´t think you should delete your Statements just because of my Opinion. — Daniel 16 secs ago
#12053 Daniel (1581 rep) | A: Saying no to frequent but trivial favors (score: 0) | posted 4 hours ago by Sandy C (366 rep)
#11853 can-ned_food (204 rep) | Q: My fiancée is addicted to a "free-to-play" (pay-to-win) game (score: 90) | posted 4 days ago by Fez Vrasta (557 rep) | edited 3 days ago by HDE 226868 (6150 rep)
@Catija, would the higher rep threshold be the same as on The Workplace for example? If it is, there would be no-one left with deletion privs except the mods and apaul in that case? Would that be a problem with e.g. HNQ upvotes vs LQP queues? — Tinkeringbell 58 secs ago
#2649 Tinkeringbell (16628 rep) | A: How do we engage more people to contribute on meta, to create a wider mandate for our policies? (score: 0) | posted 52 hours ago by goldPseudo (101 rep)
Not to play devil's advocate or to derail this answer from the Interpersonal Relations topic, but aren't all evaluations of cultural merit somewhat arbitrary? If someone spent their life painting and died a pauper, who'd think they were to become Van Gogh or the like? — can-ned_food 7 secs ago
#11889 can-ned_food (204 rep) | A: My fiancée is addicted to a "free-to-play" (pay-to-win) game (score: 73) | posted 3 days ago by Jhal (679 rep)
As it currently stands I do´t think your question answerable. 1. When you say levle you seem to rate discussion in a way which other people may not follow. Family seems a pretty personal topic for instance and can make quite a deep discussion. Second when you say raise this would require ther to be a discussion in the first place. Later in your post it read as if you are experiencing problems even entering a discussion... — Daniel 1 min ago
#12066 Daniel (1580 rep) | Q: how to raise the discussion level? (score: -1) | posted 9 minutes ago by miyoku (1 rep)
3:52 PM
Furthermore, if she really likes city building, maybe @FezVrasta should look for something which helps her achieve the same products as the mobile game but with more concern for her holistic well–being and with less concern for commercially exploiting her. For example: Although often derided, Second Life actually allows its users to freely trade with other users for their creations in the virtual world. — can-ned_food 1 min ago
#11889 can-ned_food (204 rep) | A: My fiancée is addicted to a "free-to-play" (pay-to-win) game (score: 73) | posted 4 days ago by Jhal (679 rep)
hi, ty for your answer. The way i say level isn't to 'rate'. It's the same way we speak about small and deeptalk. This kind of thing is personal to everyone and i know it. But even with that, there should be some way to find some subject to discuss about? no? And if it seems to you that i've problem entering discussion, then it's well written. I speak rarely and when others speak to me, i give the impression that i don't care, but it's not true. — miyoku 47 secs ago
#12066 miyoku (1 rep) | Q: how to raise the discussion level? (score: -1) | posted 17 minutes ago by miyoku (1 rep)
This is mostly a link-only answer. Please quote the relevant parts here, or this does not qualify as a standalone answer. — NVZ 9 secs ago
#2653 NVZ (8588 rep) | A: Who is allowed to delete comments? (score: -2) | posted 6 hours ago by Tinkeringbell (16628 rep)
Almost a case of "welcome to the rest of your life", except after school you're paid to do it :) — Darren Bartrup-Cook 7 secs ago
#12043 Darren Bartrup-Cook (101 rep) | Q: Politely refuse to help someone? (score: 9) | posted 6 hours ago by user8979192 (46 rep)
Also … maybe she is only half awake when she questions the OP … Similar to what happens with somnambulism. — can-ned_food 2 mins ago
#11989 can-ned_food (204 rep) | A: I dreamed you did so and so. Why did you do that? - How to react? (score: 85) | posted 53 hours ago by LinuxBlanket (5194 rep) | edited 2 hours ago by LinuxBlanket (5194 rep)
You can't flag comments from the mobile interface - you have to switch to the desktop view if you want to flag a comment on mobile. — Arwen Undómiel 13 secs ago
#2655 Arwen Undómiel (1925 rep) | A: Who is allowed to delete comments? (score: 5) | posted 3 hours ago by SQB (3360 rep)
#2655 SQB (3360 rep) | A: Who is allowed to delete comments? (score: 5) | posted 3 hours ago by SQB (3360 rep) | edited 3 minutes ago by NVZ (8588 rep)
#2655 NVZ (8588 rep) | A: Who is allowed to delete comments? (score: 5) | posted 3 hours ago by SQB (3360 rep) | edited 3 minutes ago by NVZ (8588 rep)
4:10 PM
Then maybe this would make two good topics: How to engage in small talk? and How to get past the small talk? — Daniel 13 secs ago
#12066 Daniel (1580 rep) | Q: how to raise the discussion level? (score: -1) | posted 29 minutes ago by miyoku (1 rep)
#2655 NVZ (8588 rep) | A: Who is allowed to delete comments? (score: 5) | posted 3 hours ago by SQB (3360 rep) | edited 2 minutes ago by NVZ (8588 rep)
@svj We are of similar age and build. The points you make would indeed be valid if there was that imbalance. — Ploni 17 secs ago
#12034 Ploni (285 rep) | Q: Saying no to frequent but trivial favors (score: 4) | posted 17 hours ago by Ploni (285 rep)
#12052 Ploni (285 rep) | A: Saying no to frequent but trivial favors (score: 3) | posted 5 hours ago by Astralbee (8217 rep) | edited 1 hours ago by Astralbee (8217 rep)
#12066 miyoku (1 rep) | Q: how to raise the discussion level? (score: -1) | posted 39 minutes ago by miyoku (1 rep)
4:28 PM
#2655 SQB (3360 rep) | A: Who is allowed to delete comments? (score: 5) | posted 4 hours ago by SQB (3360 rep) | edited 49 seconds ago by SQB (3360 rep)
#12037 Ploni (285 rep) | A: Saying no to frequent but trivial favors (score: 1) | posted 12 hours ago by Rob (428 rep)
Is he programmed to be like that and you are programmed to accept abuse in silence? - Very good point. I had never thought about that, but I am actually "programmed" to accept abuse in silence, and he is likely "programmed" to be lazy. — Ploni 50 secs ago
#12037 Ploni (285 rep) | A: Saying no to frequent but trivial favors (score: 1) | posted 12 hours ago by Rob (428 rep)
And FTR I'm in the US, but I'm looking for a generic answer, as you correctly guessed. — Ploni 45 secs ago
#12037 Ploni (285 rep) | A: Saying no to frequent but trivial favors (score: 1) | posted 12 hours ago by Rob (428 rep)
#11823 Tom Au (5016 rep) | A: How to ask for a wish from a woman? (score: -1) | posted 4 days ago by Tom Au (5016 rep) | edited 2 minutes ago by Tom Au (5016 rep)
The OP is asking "How do I ask her to spend an afternoon in the city?" How does telling them to keep the ball in play answer this question? — sphennings 26 secs ago
#11823 sphennings (4867 rep) | A: How to ask for a wish from a woman? (score: -1) | posted 4 days ago by Tom Au (5016 rep) | edited 3 minutes ago by Tom Au (5016 rep)
"Maybe later" can sound like a "yes" to someone who is looking for a yes. It may not help the OP in this situation, but rather just defer the problem. — Sam 12 secs ago
#12062 Sam (422 rep) | A: Politely refuse to help someone? (score: 0) | posted 1 hours ago by Logan (1 rep)
#11823 Tom Au (5016 rep) | A: How to ask for a wish from a woman? (score: -1) | posted 4 days ago by Tom Au (5016 rep) | edited 2 minutes ago by Tom Au (5016 rep)
Welcome to IPS.SE! This answer looks like a frame challenge, and to ensure it's a good one, it has to include more details. Can you expand on them? — LinuxBlanket 1 min ago
#12003 LinuxBlanket (5194 rep) | A: How can I respond to well-meaning comments at the gym? (score: 0) | posted 39 hours ago by horse hair (109 rep)
#12053 Maxim (2540 rep) | A: Saying no to frequent but trivial favors (score: 0) | posted 5 hours ago by Sandy C (366 rep)
Forbidden Desert is a good example. Relatively easily accessible and can be made arbitrarily hard. — Thorbjørn Ravn Andersen 47 secs ago
#12014 Thorbjørn Ravn Andersen (155 rep) | A: Winning too many games at game night - how can I keep it fun for everyone? (score: 12) | posted 25 hours ago by Galastel (403 rep)
So you need a big handicap. Considered playing co-op games where you do not compete but coorporate? — Thorbjørn Ravn Andersen 1 min ago
#11994 Thorbjørn Ravn Andersen (155 rep) | Q: Winning too many games at game night - how can I keep it fun for everyone? (score: 12) | posted 45 hours ago by waxwatcher (131 rep) | edited 45 hours ago by waxwatcher (131 rep)
5:00 PM
@John Please respond here: interpersonal.meta.stackexchange.com/questions/2595/… — gparyani 58 secs ago
#11643 gparyani (165 rep) | Q: How can I properly ask a flight attendant what's going on if I know my plane has a problem? (score: 8) | posted 9 days ago by gparyani (165 rep) | edited 8 days ago by Crafter0800 (5044 rep)
I cant answer because I believe you should not. Stand up for your beliefs. One such as this will cause many to resent you because what they are doing by supporting 'factory farming' is wrong and they know it if they stop to think about it. — Joe 58 secs ago
#11739 Joe (101 rep) | Q: How do I answer the question "why are you vegan?" honestly, without making them resent me? (score: 114) | posted 6 days ago by Bridgeburners (654 rep) | edited 5 days ago by HDE 226868 (6160 rep)
I'm sorry, that sucks. I bet none of those people would think to say the same thing to a man, because no one thinks that a man's appearance is their business. — swbarnes2 25 secs ago
#12002 swbarnes2 (390 rep) | Q: How can I respond to well-meaning comments at the gym? (score: 11) | posted 44 hours ago by Ash (455 rep) | edited 39 hours ago by Ash (455 rep) | Has magic comment
@Ploni I'd recommend you keep it about the specific situation - there's no way we can give good advice that applies across being in a workplace with your boss giving menial requests, being at your own home where you have authority or being at a family home where you are a guest. Each of these has different dynamics and needs different advice. — Bilkokuya 42 secs ago
#12052 Bilkokuya (1178 rep) | A: Saying no to frequent but trivial favors (score: 4) | posted 6 hours ago by Astralbee (8227 rep) | edited 2 hours ago by Astralbee (8227 rep)
5:23 PM
when you vote down, the least you can do is state your reasoning. Otherwise it's just anonymous negativity without any benefit. — Haunt_House 6 secs ago
#11914 Haunt_House (204 rep) | A: My fiancée is addicted to a "free-to-play" (pay-to-win) game (score: 3) | posted 3 days ago by Haunt_House (204 rep) | edited 3 days ago by Haunt_House (204 rep)
What is your roll in this situation? Are you presenting, or are you a member of the audience? — sphennings 26 secs ago
#12072 sphennings (4867 rep) | Q: How to deal with rude interruptions in a seminar? (score: 0) | posted 9 minutes ago by arrowturnips (13 rep)
"Bachelor" is by definition male (unless using it to say someone has a bachelor degree from a college). You would be a "bachelorette," but that has connotations suggesting a wild time the night before your wedding. I suggest you use "single" instead. — Kevin 44 secs ago
#11981 Kevin (101 rep) | Q: Dealing with colleagues who think bachelor women as being available always (score: 11) | posted 58 hours ago by Sandy C (364 rep) | edited 50 hours ago by D.Hutchinson (2149 rep)
You tell the same thing to her the next morning, and see what her reaction would be. ;) — Oswald 38 secs ago
#11982 Oswald (101 rep) | Q: I dreamed you did so and so. Why did you do that? - How to react? (score: 44) | posted 57 hours ago by Edgar (2034 rep) | edited 2 hours ago by henning (3642 rep)
@NVZ Just that the approaches of making pasta are much more clear when it comes to right or wrong. Most answers are still opinion based. Just count all the 'you can't change people' answers, which are strange because people change people through feedback all the time. — Haunt_House 1 min ago
#2574 Haunt_House (204 rep) | A: How does "primarily opinion-based" apply to questions about interpersonal skills? (score: 4) | posted 12 days ago by sphennings (4867 rep)
I don't know if it differs between app release but in iOS, you just tap the comment. — Catija ♦ 8 secs ago
#2655 Catija (10237 rep) | A: Who is allowed to delete comments? (score: 5) | posted 5 hours ago by SQB (3360 rep) | edited 1 hours ago by SQB (3360 rep)
#2655 SQB (3360 rep) | A: Who is allowed to delete comments? (score: 5) | posted 5 hours ago by SQB (3360 rep) | edited 1 minutes ago by SQB (3360 rep)
5:42 PM
What is the context? Are in a 6 person meeting in an office? Are you at concert with 5,000 people? Is it an executive meeting? An informal meeting? Also, do you really need to call B out? Is your goal to create drama? Are you in any way responsible for the interactions between A and B? — Clay07g 25 secs ago
#12072 Clay07g (1141 rep) | Q: How to deal with rude interruptions in a seminar? (score: 0) | posted 25 minutes ago by arrowturnips (13 rep)
@zibadawatimmy: Cannot agree. If I'm doing it as a matter of conscience, it may have nothing to do with my enjoyment of it. Consequently, it is not unlikely that I will do it but won't enjoy it, or won't enjoy it much, and so could not in honesty give my enjoyment of it as my motivation. — Mathieu K. 57 secs ago
#11758 Mathieu K. (103 rep) | A: How do I answer the question "why are you vegan?" honestly, without making them resent me? (score: 68) | posted 5 days ago by peufeu (9728 rep) | edited 4 days ago by peufeu (9728 rep)
@zibadawatimmy: I will acknowledge that this is, for me, a thought experiment. I am not a practicing vegan and cannot say with certainty what the experience would be like for me. What I can say from experience is that the things I have felt compelled to do as a matter of principle or, as you put it, in duress, those are often things I have not enjoyed and of which I could not honestly say, "I liked them." — Mathieu K. just now
#11758 Mathieu K. (103 rep) | A: How do I answer the question "why are you vegan?" honestly, without making them resent me? (score: 68) | posted 5 days ago by peufeu (9728 rep) | edited 4 days ago by peufeu (9728 rep)
This does not provide an answer to the question. To critique or request clarification from an author, leave a comment below their post. - From Review — Spagirl 1 min ago
#12003 Spagirl (8566 rep) | A: How can I respond to well-meaning comments at the gym? (score: 0) | posted 40 hours ago by horse hair (109 rep)
6:03 PM
Good suggestions, but I hope that no one gets the idea that there has to be an explanation or excuse if OP decides no to do anything. Saying "No" is polite (lecturing your friends about how copying is counter-productive is not polite). After all, OP doesn't care if his friends cheat, he just doesn't wanted to be cheated from (fair and common standpoint). — Clay07g 1 min ago
#12045 Clay07g (1141 rep) | A: Politely refuse to help someone? (score: 23) | posted 8 hours ago by Ahsan9981 (301 rep) | edited 7 hours ago by Ahsan9981 (301 rep)
6:26 PM
#12011 djsmiley2k (1236 rep) | A: I dreamed you did so and so. Why did you do that? - How to react? (score: 3) | posted 30 hours ago by Bob (31 rep)
I like the core point of this answer ("overpower with diplomacy"), but I feel like the second and third answers come across as passive-aggressive. May I suggest also that the OP could simply say "one second, I'll finish [the paragraph/article] I'm reading"? — LinuxBlanket 2 mins ago
#12053 LinuxBlanket (5194 rep) | A: Saying no to frequent but trivial favors (score: 1) | posted 6 hours ago by Sandy C (382 rep)
@CarlWitthoft If you are veg*n for ethical reasons, it's because you think eating
[food subset] is morally wrong. The OP is worried that people who do eat [food subset] (and always have, and have never really thought about it) will resent them for considering their behaviors, which are highly typical, to be morally wrong.People don't like being thought of as being amoral. — Azor-Ahai 15 secs ago
#11739 Azor-Ahai (240 rep) | Q: How do I answer the question "why are you vegan?" honestly, without making them resent me? (score: 115) | posted 6 days ago by Bridgeburners (659 rep) | edited 5 days ago by HDE 226868 (6170 rep)
@Discrete Lizard: China has implemented several countermeasures, from required upfront information (e.g. companies must publish ALL loot percentages) to severe fines for companies who cross lines in profit gathering through these kinds of means. It had become a major socioeconomic issue there, and they responded quickly and thoroughly. — Xodarap777 1 min ago
#11864 Xodarap777 (101 rep) | A: My fiancée is addicted to a "free-to-play" (pay-to-win) game (score: 137) | posted 4 days ago by peufeu (9728 rep) | edited 2 hours ago by Community (1 rep)
@pefeu Be careful justifying through capitalist intentions. Speaking as a former counselor, I can attest that this is becoming a significant addiction problem in the US, at least. This will likely be seen similarly to Phillip Morris and cigarettes in the somewhat near future. Unfortunately, it takes a full generation to realize the effects of harmful addictions in society. — Xodarap777 24 secs ago
#11864 Xodarap777 (101 rep) | A: My fiancée is addicted to a "free-to-play" (pay-to-win) game (score: 137) | posted 4 days ago by peufeu (9728 rep) | edited 2 hours ago by Community (1 rep)
In my family, the go-to "joke" response to such requests is: "Are your legs broken?" — Nuclear Wang 1 min ago
#12052 Nuclear Wang (101 rep) | A: Saying no to frequent but trivial favors (score: 4) | posted 7 hours ago by Astralbee (8237 rep) | edited 4 hours ago by Astralbee (8237 rep)
7:07 PM
@sphennings and Clay07g : I will be person A. The audience is rather small, around 10 people. B has a higher position than other, and his general behavior suggests to me that he merely want to show off his knowledge. — arrowturnips 1 min ago
#12072 arrowturnips (13 rep) | Q: How to deal with rude interruptions in a seminar? (score: 0) | posted 1 hours ago by arrowturnips (13 rep)
I guess my goal is to cause embarrassment for B. I wouldn't do this if this was the first time he did it. But indeed he does it on a very regular basis and seem not to get the signs from others that he is obstructing. — arrowturnips 12 secs ago
#12072 arrowturnips (13 rep) | Q: How to deal with rude interruptions in a seminar? (score: 0) | posted 1 hours ago by arrowturnips (13 rep)
The problem with calling her fat isn't that it's taboo calling her fat—I hate the modern atmosphere of political correctness as much as you—it's that her weight is largely irrelevant to hiking. Plenty of overweight people are in better shape for a hike like this than skinnier ones; in fact, at some level it's an advantage since they have more energy to keep going and a pack of the same weight is a significantly smaller part of their body mass. Who's going to have an easier time carrying a 50-pound pack, a 100-pound person who's never hiked or a 250-pound person who hikes a few times a year? — Kevin 44 secs ago
#11874 Kevin (101 rep) | A: How to tell an overweight person that the hike will be too hard? (score: 34) | posted 4 days ago by AndreiROM (14183 rep) | edited 3 days ago by AndreiROM (14183 rep)
Oreos sold in the US use "cream" made with vegetable oils, though the company admits that they are processed on equipment that is also used for dairy products, so there may be some cross-contamination. Oreos sold in Canada use beef fat (and are really good :-) — Lee Daniel Crocker 7 secs ago
#11747 Lee Daniel Crocker (101 rep) | A: How do I answer the question "why are you vegan?" honestly, without making them resent me? (score: 123) | posted 6 days ago by Dan Anderson (6192 rep) | edited 4 days ago by Community (1 rep)
@kevin - hi, thanks for your comment, Please note that I never once advised calling her fat. I wrote that intro because the OP expressed a fear of appearing to be fat-shaming this woman if he brings up the fact that he doesn't think she can handle the hike. As you pointed out, there's other ways of bringing up the topic, and assessing whether - weight aside - she can handle the hike. — AndreiROM 23 secs ago
#11874 AndreiROM (14183 rep) | A: How to tell an overweight person that the hike will be too hard? (score: 34) | posted 4 days ago by AndreiROM (14183 rep) | edited 3 days ago by AndreiROM (14183 rep)
7:38 PM
I'd suggest that embarrassing someone is a poor interpersonal skill. I think that the goal should be to have the person not interrupt. — baldPrussian 1 min ago
#12072 baldPrussian (9205 rep) | Q: How to deal with rude interruptions in a seminar? (score: 0) | posted 2 hours ago by arrowturnips (13 rep)
I'm not offended. I'm just stating that being medically obese alone (which is often defined by BMI, which just takes weight and height, not fat percentage, into account, so muscle/fat weight doesn't make a difference in the calculation) doesn't immediately indicate a lack of fitness. — Ash 2 mins ago
#11871 Ash (453 rep) | Q: How to tell an overweight person that the hike will be too hard? (score: 81) | posted 4 days ago by iFlo (509 rep) | edited 3 days ago by iFlo (509 rep)
#2573 Selvek (163 rep) | Q: How does "primarily opinion-based" apply to questions about interpersonal skills? (score: 4) | posted 12 days ago by bluevapor (111 rep) | edited 11 days ago by bluevapor (111 rep)
#11864 Crowley (181 rep) | A: My fiancée is addicted to a "free-to-play" (pay-to-win) game (score: 140) | posted 4 days ago by peufeu (9728 rep) | edited 3 hours ago by Community (1 rep)
Note that if they get caught cheating, it will be beneficial for them in the long run, because cheating later in life has worse consequences, so it's better if they learn that it's wrong now. A real friend would tell them so, and personally I think talking to the teacher about it would be good. — mbomb007 1 min ago
#12043 mbomb007 (171 rep) | Q: How can I politely refuse to help classmates with their work? (score: 15) | posted 10 hours ago by user8979192 (76 rep) | edited 1 hours ago by Kendra (1652 rep)
@Xodarap777 I'm having trouble understanding what "Be careful justifying through capitalist intentions" means (not native English speaker). — peufeu 11 secs ago
#11864 peufeu (9728 rep) | A: My fiancée is addicted to a "free-to-play" (pay-to-win) game (score: 140) | posted 4 days ago by peufeu (9728 rep) | edited 4 hours ago by Community (1 rep)
#12047 mbomb007 (170 rep) | A: How can I politely refuse to help classmates with their work? (score: 9) | posted 9 hours ago by Sandy C (380 rep)
This is the opposite of strong refusal skills. If it's about feeling guilty, then your motives are wrong. You have to realize that it's not just about how you feel, it's also about helping them learn to learn. They have to be able to figure it out on their own and learn the material. — mbomb007 1 min ago
#12062 mbomb007 (169 rep) | A: How can I politely refuse to help classmates with their work? (score: -1) | posted 5 hours ago by Logan (1 rep)
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