The Awkward Silence

CaldeiraG

12:08 AM

@Tinkeringbell it took a while x)

Extroverted Main Man

4:25 AM

0

Q: Being asked to share (assignment-like) solutions

I'm a mature age student doing a STEM masters. For one unit I'm in an online study group (everything has been online due to the pandemic) with students who are mostly much younger than me, with the exception of a lady who I think is older than me (maybe in her 40s). Towards the end of semester, ...

Tinkeringbell

7:35 AM

morning!

IPS Comment Bot

This is a great question and something that has irritated me about TV/Films for more than a decade. It just ruins the integrity of the scene imo. I have come to believe over the years that this has evolved as a part of making TV / Films, and that they believe that act of saying 'bye' is too mundane, and so by instead just hanging up, they believe that this adds some element of 'things left unsaid'; a sort of tension / emotionality to the scene. In reality, it's just nonsense and looks daft when you compare it to reality - once you see it, you can't unsee it and it always looks ridiculous. — YorSubs 2 mins ago

Matched regex(es) ["possible-aic"]

CaldeiraG

7:53 AM

Morning!

@ExtrovertedMainMan And it got to HNQ

and got the boot too

XD

Tinkeringbell

Yeah, it was getting so many answers all just saying the same ... and it's not really a great shop sign for the site either.

CaldeiraG

yep

on that I agree

Ael

8:42 AM

Morning people, I have a question for those of you who work

So, my dad told me that, during the "once a week" meeting with your manager you are not suppose to talk about what you will do next week. You are more suppose to talk about whatever, things that have been bothering you, etc..

What are your though on that? (pinging @tink)

skullpatrol

9:05 AM

Your dad is a wise man to tell you not to bottle things up that are bothering you at work.

lila

hi

skullpatrol

hi pal

I'm glad I didn't run out and buy that book.

Because, drum roll...

Jordan Peterson Announces his Next Book "BEYOND ORDER: 12 More Rules for Life" | Dapo Ibrahim

►

:-)

lila

haha ok ^.^

skullpatrol

Available March 2, 2021

He says, "Beyond Order" is an investigation into chaos...

Tinkeringbell

@Ael Depends on what your manager expects from these weekly meetings. Are they to keep track of your personal progress? To keep informed about the entire team's progress?

Do you think they want to be told if there's things they could fix?

Ael

9:24 AM

@Tinkeringbell We only talk about the ongoing tasks so I guess it's the only thing my manager is interested in

But I'm a bit curious to know if this is how other manager use this "one to one" time

Tinkeringbell

Well, if there's ongoing tasks and you are bothered by something related to it (frustrated by team members or other teams not cooperating well) that's definitely something you could share, I think.

Same for personal circumstances, perhaps. If there's many things ongoing and they're stressing you out because they're not prioritized right, or you get a lot of tasks that turn out not to be tasks for you...

I wouldn't want to tell the manager that I'm annoyed because the shop was out of toilet paper, but if it's related to an ongoing task and your work/ability to do your work, I guess it's okay to mention.

I don't have weekly one on one time with my manager, I have a six weekly 'job control' and a bi-weekly 'team update call', where we can share such stuff.

CaldeiraG

@Ael depends, my usual weekly meeting (been cancelled since July) is more about your personal progress; it can also be used to point out issues or stuff to improve

Ael

9:47 AM

Alright, thank you both for your responses :)

CaldeiraG

9:57 AM

:)

CaldeiraG

12:17 PM

nothing to do over here :p

Tinkeringbell

Kinda same here... I'm waiting for mom to let me know she's finished her phone call and lunch is ready ;)

M.A.R.

> Why did a Mexican take Xanax? Hispanic attacks.

CaldeiraG

1:00 PM

@Tinkeringbell :)

just had lunch

A J

It's time for dinner for me. :P

I forgot to ask what is in dinner tonight.

CaldeiraG

@AJ have a good dinner then :p

A J

bon appétit

This is a nice song from Kety Perry.

CaldeiraG

> Does this seem like a reasonable request?
https://interpersonal.stackexchange.com/questions/26480/being-asked-to-share-assignment-like-solutions#comment103049_26480

I don't know, do you (OP) think it's a reasonable request?

I find it funny OP wants us to guess if it's a reasonable request? Do you think cheating is ethical?

I probably should write a comment tbf XD

@AJ i don't listen to whatever Katy Perry is doing XD

I do like anything that has a high BPM :P

A J

1:28 PM

Lol

Tinkeringbell

1:42 PM

@CaldeiraG OP might need a taste of their own medicine...

Hi @Tinkeringbell, I have a general picture of your understanding and on that basis, I cannot see this discussion progressing further. Releasing the need to be right can lead to more productive discussions and may be of value to you in the future. — WithRegards 49 mins ago

CaldeiraG

Yeah I saw that

Tinkeringbell

Anyhow... glad to know I'm not the only one that's tired of that post. XD

CaldeiraG

XD

it's a silly question

Tinkeringbell

Yeah, and the assumption that there was something being discussed is also... not very true. There's a difference between trying to explain the same thing thrice and having a discussion about it XD

Added that to the comment.

Ael

2:01 PM

@Tinkeringbell What? xD

Tinkeringbell

Apparently we were 'discussing' whether the question was asking "Does this seem like a reasonable request from someone you don't really know?" (literal quote from the question), instead of me trying to explain three times over that such a question is off-topic on this site XD

I don't know either... some things are just weird, this is one of them :)

Ael

2:14 PM

@Tinkeringbell Well, it's always nice to see a new comer try to prove to a mod/old time user that something is indeed on-topic :p "No, no, you are wrong. This indeed relate to interpersonal skils".

M.A.R.

@Tinkeringbell I'm sick of that non-argument

Some people think being wrong will affect their ego, so they go out of the way to make the other side look bad: "Jeez you don't have to be right"

Tinkeringbell

@M.A.R. I understand where you're coming from, and I don't see this discussion progressing any further...

M.A.R.

Like if you weren't looking for what's right, why did you even start the darn conversation in the first place!

Ael

@Tinkeringbell I just read your answer to this comment. It's gold, IMO xD

Tinkeringbell

:)

M.A.R.

2:17 PM

Meh, I'm not a metallurgist

Is that a word?

H

It's a word

Ael

@M.A.R. Given the nature of internet, maybe it's just light then. With a bit of electricity too, I guess

skullpatrol

"New" contributors deserve more than just the benefit of the doubt; but also, guidance.

imho

Ael

@skullpatrol They were guided. Three time. With no success

skullpatrol

is there a 3-strikes rule?

Ael

Not really?

But don't worry, the user wasn't banned or anything

It's just that their question is closed now (which they would have been anyway) but they can still edit to make it on-topic (by following the guidlines provided on the comment)

skullpatrol

2:25 PM

ok

skullpatrol

2:40 PM

insert-awkward-silence

CaldeiraG

3:05 PM

eyes-here rant interpersonal.stackexchange.com/a/26483/12962

i'm very glad this was removed from HNQ

IMO this question gives a bad image of IPS

as said by tink earlier

just wanted to point out again XD

Tinkeringbell

I don't think it's necessarily a rant... but I'll leave a comment :)

CaldeiraG

not a clear blunt rant but I think it's somehow criticizing it

I completely disagree, but I believe that you are entitled to your opinion. I believe that interpersonal skills are affected by the misrepresentation of reality in films, and I think that's worth digging into when looking at interpersonal skills. — YorSubs 2 mins ago

lol

Tinkeringbell

Well, you know what... it was a bad question. Some close votes could still help... As I don't see OP editing it to be a good question soon... I think Shog's advice under "The larger picture" here applies..

CaldeiraG

3:21 PM

Wish I could cast close votes :p

I do agree on that perspective

Tinkeringbell

Well I closed it... now to handle the comments O.o

IPS Comment Bot

Post is currently hot! With 10 comments in the last 3 hours: Is it customary in the US not to say "bye" after a phone call?

CaldeiraG

@IPSCommentBot quoting Tink here

yesterday, by Tinkeringbell

Oh shut up, that post isn't hot at all, it just needs editing.

XDD

Tinkeringbell

3:48 PM

@CaldeiraG We need to get you a question you can write a HNQ answer to... XD

CaldeiraG

ooh that sounds tough

:P

Tinkeringbell

Yeah well it would help, I hope... sometimes it does feel like I'm the only one moderating here (which definitely isn't true, the other moderators are also still doing a great job...) Just that I miss seeing community close votes a lot...

Moving that comment thread to chat seems to have cooled things down significantly, luckily :)

CaldeiraG

@Tinkeringbell yeah, i'm also lazy and in somewhat need to talk to people outside of work and family XD

which you might guess i've pretty much do home -> work and back everyday

Tinkeringbell

I've only been home :P

CaldeiraG

(except weekends of course but you need to stay home anyways) XD

Tinkeringbell

3:57 PM

It gets annoying after a while, I agree.

I like having SE chat and also the bell tree forums (animal crossing related) during this time to keep me busy ;)

CaldeiraG

i've been keeping up on IM chats but it's not the same

i wanna hang out with friends and do stuff outside

even though i have a preference of being home anyways

the lack of decisions annoys me

@Tinkeringbell :)

it's surely keeping me busy at work

been as boring

Tinkeringbell

Same.... And it doesn't help that I get disturbed ten times a day with other small tasks and as such never get to focus on my big ones...

@CaldeiraG it's not that bad here yet XD

CaldeiraG

@Tinkeringbell there's been a curfew on the weekends from 13h - 05:00

it's been rewened again for the next 2 weeks

Tinkeringbell

Ohh, that's bad.. at least over here I can just drive my car around or go take a walk

CaldeiraG

you can go take a walk and go to the supermarket

that's it

curfew allows "hygienic walks", as they call it

Tinkeringbell

4:04 PM

Ah, that's at least something!

CaldeiraG

yeah

Tinkeringbell

Numbers here aren't great either, things aren't going down as fast as they want, so lockdown will still be there next January

Which does mean... NO FAMILY FOR CHRISTMAS, YAY!

CaldeiraG

:/

Tinkeringbell

I'm sorry..I'm uncharacteristically happy about that though

No dealing with a-hole grandpa, deaf grandma, and otherwise dysfunctional aunts, uncles and cousins

CaldeiraG

XD

to be fair, all my christmas are within my household

no extended family

it definitely makes things easier

grandma, uncles are all JW (no christmas), uncles celebrate on their own

nothing changes

Tinkeringbell

4:18 PM

Here there's the few days between Christmas and New Years that are usually filled with family visiting (I stopped going on visits years ago), and then there's new years day itself where basically all the family meets up in one place yet again...

All that counts as no family for Christmas to me 😂

A lot is going to change here, all for the better :)

CaldeiraG

yay :D

M.A.R.

6:59 PM

@skullpatrol I used to say this vague semi-profound semi-wholesome stuff myself but eventually I've come to believe the best judges of that are the people doing the moderation.

Distance is supposed to give us perspective, but it makes one expectant on the internet.

@CaldeiraG JW? Is that a common abbreviation for jewish?