The Awkward Silence

Em C

5:31 AM

→ 52 messages moved to Trash

kinda glad our latest HNQ is over the weekend, looking at the comments and answers already...

Extroverted Main Man

11:02 AM

0

Q: For the girl of my heart?

I am a university Student (above 20 last month) pretty much matured.The story begins with Two years back when our uni new admissions has been started, at that new batch i saw a girl,and she was that much attractive for me that i couldn't resist to stare at her. it was just like she brings colors ...

Em C

1:49 PM

eyeballs-pls interpersonal.stackexchange.com/a/23550/3171

this seems kind of rude, but maybe it's just me

→ 9 messages moved to Trash

chumpbot

2:15 PM

Post is currently hot! With 10 comments in the last 3 hours: For the girl of my heart?

Extroverted Main Man

0

Q: I'm dating my best friends crush without knowing she liked him?

One day, I grew the balls to express how I felt about my crush. He felt the same way so we started dating (we were close friends before). Few moments pass and I get a message,"we're not friends anymore by my #1 best friend. I asked her why she said that and she told me,"you're dating MY crush! I ...

conflicts

Rainbacon

2:33 PM

@EmC same

@EmC I also thought it was a bit rude, but not enough to necessarily flag it as such. I did flag it NAA because it doesn't really answer the question

Em C

2:57 PM

@Rainbacon cool, thanks :)

M.A.R.

5:00 PM

@chumpbot Related but fluffy. With lots of fluff.

Extroverted Main Man

5:44 PM

0

Q: My boyfriend has issues with Hygiene

So I have been dating my boyfriend for 2 years now heading to 3, and he is wonderful I have no issues regarding the love/intimacy we have for each other, he is my best friend, we spend every day together. When I first met him after a while of talking I came over to his old apartment, as soon as I...

relationships

Em C

5:56 PM

@ExtrovertedMainMan run on sentences ahoy

(am editing)

user15026

Oh, wow...that's a lot of...text

Em C

and now that I got to the question.. off-topic right now too :/ "am I right or wrong for feeling this way? / what should I do?"

not a fun situation to be in :(

user15026

6:35 PM

No, not fun at all

M.A.R.

8:28 PM

@chumpbot Um, wow. How is that answer not offensive to the OP?

chumpbot

@M.A.R. For real?

M.A.R.

@chumpbot Are you pulling my superior limb

Or inferior limb

Because I'm warning you, we've had anatomy this semester

Em C

@M.A.R. do feel free to flag things on that entire post ;)

M.A.R.

@EmC That requires reading and comprehension and lots of ATP.

We also have biochem this semester.

Em C

@M.A.R. ATP?

M.A.R.

8:37 PM

Adenosin yadda yadda. The cellular fuel that stores energy and releases it where needed

Em C

biology stuff, got it :P

M.A.R.

Well OK that's actually junior high school knowledge here but I'm so hyped! . . . About I dunno what

@EmC I guess it can all be summed up in "HOLY CRAP CELLS ARE AWESOME"

Em C

well I'm glad you're excited about it :D

M.A.R.

@EmC About that question

It's kinda really bent out of shape. Maybe people got really over-sensitive over the word "prayer" or something, or I'm really missing a lot of cultural nuance.

Is it such a dreadful thing when someone from the opposite side of the belief spectrum just wishes you well in their own way?

What are you trying to achieve by telling him at you're not just thinking about him, but explicitly that you're praying for him? If prayer works, I'm sure it would work whether or not he knew about it. So why not let it just "work behind the scenes"? — Alexander 19 hours ago

I don't understand where this comment is coming from, for example. Are they assuming this "my prayers are with you" will be accompanied with a thorough heated discussion about creationism and evolution?

It's maybe internet doing internety things I guess. Blowing things out of proportion. That, or maybe I'm the outlier too lenient or even appreciative of such remarks. Yeah, I guess if a Buddhist came to me and said the equivalent of "I pray for you in front of Buddha" or something, I wouldn't be anything but thankful of their concern.

98

A: How can I offer my prayers for an atheist?

I am an atheist myself so I'm going to answer it as if you would say it to me: I'm an atheist, which means that heaven/hell/praying have no value (good nor bad, just void) to me. The act of praying is of no benefit to me, nor will I see it like that, despite what you think. What I can see is th...

Em C

@M.A.R. I mean I am definitely closer to your side on this ... like I posted an answer earlier today because it seemed rude to me ("oh great how much do I owe you"), but nobody's flagged or even commented on it as such

M.A.R.

8:49 PM

Yeah, this makes sense. Again, except the last paragraph maybe. Your intentions are to show your concern and support, not shoehorn your beliefs, so you actually have to try to offend them with being too . . . uh, suggestive and shoehorn-ish about your beliefs.

Em C

yeah, I liked that answer too

there are certainly ways to say "I'm praying for you" that can make one uncomfortable or annoyed (and I have been on the receiving end of that!) but I don't think for most people there is no way to even mention it

at least, I wish the answers saying "I'm an atheist and would be offended" would say something about like, "... and this also applies to all/most [community / demographic / other group characteristic] that I know" so OP has some hope of guessing which camp the coworker is in

M.A.R.

Sure, if we've had a discussion before that ended up with ourselves expressing our dislikes for each other's beliefs, me going straight and emphasizing my prayers (Again, this needs to look more important than the pressing issue, the health condition or whatever) will come off as rude.

> You feel powerless in the face of some hardship, and all you can do is ask a higher power to intercede.

From another answer. Absolutely unnecessary and potentially offensive statement.

It's a mockery of the OP's beliefs.

Em C

://////

M.A.R.

Sooo . . . I wanted to say I don't wanna get involved because this has been the nth time this is happening, but it's a bit late for my punchline

Em C

hah. the perils of HNQ :P

M.A.R.

8:57 PM

No, not HNQ, or even IPS. Just the good ol' religion vs. atheism happening

Politicians come and go, but this has been going on forever.

Em C

oh, that aspect yes.

awesome our hot water is finally ready to go again so... brb gotta do all the dishes

M.A.R.

TTYL

Ælis

9:35 PM

@EmC Sorry, I don't have many spoons right now, I am not/won't be able to help moderate or even read long post for now :/

Well, I gave a small edit (and a flag) to this specific answer after all, but that's mostly all I can do for now

Rainbacon

Yeah, most of my spoons are going to that question. Fortunately we're going to see the new movie about Mr. Rodgers tonight, so that should replenish some spoons

Ælis

@AGirlHasNoName In response to this MSE answer (which is IMO so bad that I couldn't read it in full but has just been offered a 500 rep bounty), I'm looking to bounty an answer written by someone from the trans community and about the issues we are currently facing. So, if there is any answer of yours that you are particularly proud of or any answer from someone else that you find particularly good, please, let me know

@Rainbacon I have no idea what this movie is, but I hope you will have fun indeed :)

user15026

9:52 PM

@Rainbacon Oooh, that sounds fun. Let us know how the movie is!

Rainbacon

@Ælis Mr Rodgers was the host of a very popular children's tv show in the US. He taught us all to be kind to our neighbors, no matter who they were. There's a new movies out about his life

AGirlHasNoName

@Rainbacon ohh that sounds awesome. Yes please share

Ælis

@Rainbacon Seems indeed like someone worth listening to, at least on this matter :)

AGirlHasNoName

10:07 PM

@Ælis Sorry, I will keep looking but nothing jumps out to me at the moments. As for me, I'd rather you didn't bounty anything I wrote. I don't want any more attention there. I almost deleted my account there I am so through with that fight.

Em C

11:24 PM

@Ælis no worries!! hope your evening is going ok :)

fwiw I definitely didn't mean to imply anyone was slacking :p that was just me worrying that I was being oversensitive

Extroverted Main Man

11:37 PM

0

Q: Why do Hong Kongers think British people are exceptionally crafty?

My brother Ivan and I speak English with British accent, because I grew up Hong Kong and many teachers were British. I don't know if it's Received Pronunciation. When ever we speak English in HK, some stranger in HK will ask us in Cantonese if we're British. We answer no. Then they very respect...

hong-kong

Transcript for