When travelling e.g. India, you always need to be a bit aware of possible scams and robbers. Telling everyone you're from one of the richest country in the world might give ideas to thieves. It might explain some of the hesitation "should I tell the truth? How much can I trust this person?" — Legisey 2 mins ago

Could you give an example for the email? Especially, what do you mean by "don't tell them what they will have"? Is it strictly about food and drinks? Or also activities? I would be quite worried to go to a party with coworkers (even informal) if there is a mysterious "fun" activity (karaoke? costumes?...). I would lean towards a more informative but still fun email. — Taladris 42 secs ago

+1 The playlist is very interesting and nicely illustrates how to distill and break down the essential content of what you want to explain. — ahemmetter 2 mins ago

Yes, I would consider that "getting contacts" (was going to write about it but hit character limit), I just thought I'd comment on a more general situation. — IcedLance 18 secs ago

Could surely be specific to french culture. I for my part always assume that as long as you are not a part of the conversation, you simply don't care or are not interested. The point where I might think that you share these views, is when you are in a conversation with said person and don't say anthing against it or have your own opinion. That being said, should the answer be limited to france or a widely accepted solution? — XtremeBaumer 1 min ago

I think the downvotes on your post (not on you) are because it does not offer a solution for the OP — Rory Alsop 1 min ago

I have problem with this as I don't think you can rate people on okcupid. apart from "pass/like". with the third option "no interaction". But If I read that correcty it would say that okc women users state there is NONE "most attractive" male users? Which kinda make the whole pool worthless because then that 2% would be most attractive. You kind a benchmark. And that benchmark would/should be in that 0%. — SZCZERZO KŁY 1 min ago

Thank you very much for your insightful parable. It is indeed a very interesting story with many parallels. You mentioned I "fear the possibility that such an important figure will be lacking in [my] near future" and indeed this might relate to the sudden realisation my feelings were irrational in the first place which basically boils down to your description. — AtypicalGuy 2 mins ago

Thanks for your input even though I might have to disagree slightly on the point of "losing your best friend because they've entered into a romantic relationship". I can definitely see this being a common issue in this scenario, however the more I think about it and read your and the other answers the more I think the sudden realisation that my feelings towards him were irrational is what made me upset. Actually he's not to blame for anything here. I gave him a vast significance that was definitely going to cause issues... — AtypicalGuy 1 min ago

@Ælis In my work (USA) there are a lot (most) of the coworkers of the opposite political persuasion to me. If someone is talking politics and I am "disengaged" (faced away, not reacting, not paying attention, not nodding my head or giving any indication of agreement) it's clear to people that I'm not agreeing. I don't have to say "hey, I don't go along with racism / voter suppression / etc". — DaveG 33 secs ago

Thanks for this good answer, Due to various reasons, divorce is not the option. — NiceGuy 32 secs ago

Dang you beat me to it... :) — Lux Claridge 54 secs ago