The Awkward Silence

Anilla

1:17 AM

@Mithrandir That's what I was thinkin' hehe

ElizB

1:42 AM

→ 11 messages moved to Trash

Ælis

7:37 AM

I hate my blood taken this morning (for test analyze) and I was almost fine (like no fainting) \o/

JAD

hate or had?

avazula

→ 10 messages moved to Trash

Hello everyone!

Ælis

@JAD had ^^ (but I hate that, so :p )

Tinkeringbell

Good morning!

@ElizB Sorry I'm late, but congratulations!

avazula

@ElizB :cheers: congrats:

Extroverted Main Man

8:57 AM

0

Q: My friend did me a favour. Should I gave him money like a gift!

So basically my friend works in night shift, and there happens to pass bay one guy that is close to his boss, and they start having a conversation like. Does someone have a reliable business guy to do business with(and he told what he wants )? Then my friend spoke about me, and sort off was a lin...

IPS Comment Bot

9:47 AM

If you think his help was actually worth that amount then you could simply buy the iPhone, give it to him and say with a laugh, "Here's that iPhone you asked me for!" Or, next time you see him, say, "Okay let's go and buy you that iPhone. When's a good time for you?" — chasly from UK 1 min ago

Matched regex(es) ["possible-aic"]

avazula

@IPSCommentBot tp

IPS Comment Bot

Marked this comment as caught correctly (tp). Currently marked 1tps/0fps. beep boop My human overlords won't let me flag that, so you'll have to do it yourself.

avazula

@IPSCommentBot beep boop I already did you silly bot

Ælis

10:05 AM

I just receive two boxes of things from Stack Exchange. It feels like Christmas again :D

avazula

@Ælis Ooh! Nice! Mine should arrive soon as well then :D

Ælis

I hope for you, even if you are in a way smaller city than I am :p

avazula

@Ælis Let's talk about the other 2499 people living in that small town

Ælis

@avazula Wow, so little! (yes, I'm playing the arrogant Parisienne :p )

I just check, in my arrondissement we are 203.127 people xD

avazula

@Ælis wow xD

Tinkeringbell

10:21 AM

@Ælis I'm still waiting for mine to arrive too! It's kinda nerve wrecking, seeing everybody getting theirs and not hearing anything about mine :) What was in yours?

Ælis

@Tinkeringbell Too many things! A lot of stickers (stack overflow, stack exchange, superuser, server fault, chemistry), two bottles (one thermos, the other not), two "super user" pen, Two t-shirt (one TWP, the other SE), four(!) notebooks, one workplace stapler (I keep wanting using it, but I have nothing to staple ><), I super cool chemistry mug that I asked for my sister (but I kind of want to keep it now :p ) and I things it's about all ^^

Tinkeringbell

Wow! That's a really nice package then! :D

Makes me look even more forward to receiving mine, if one ever comes ;)

avazula

@Ælis :O that's huge ...

@Tinkeringbell hey, you got a watch already... I'm the sad one here :p

Tinkeringbell

@avazula Hahaha True, I have a watch, a cheese board, a moderator cap, and I also have stickers, a notebook (already almost full though), a pen, and a bottle from last years winter bash ;)

What can I say? I'm just greedy XD

Oh, I forgot the pyjama's I got last year as well

avazula

:O sad

Tinkeringbell

10:32 AM

I hope yours arrives just as soon :)

avazula

I'll try to be patient :)

Ælis

@Tinkeringbell Wow, the cheese board and the moderator cap look really cool!

How long after becoming a mod did you got the cap?

Tinkeringbell

@Ælis As I'm a pro-tem, I had to mail and wait quite a while ;)

I think I asked for it in May, and it arrived somewhere in August?

Ælis

It kinda makes me want to be mod just for the cap :p

@avazula It definitively is. I wasn't expected so much!

Maybe I should just ask for a "community mod" cap since I'm flagging a lot of stuff :p (I'm almost at 1000 helpful flags!)

Tinkeringbell

@Ælis Hahaha I don't think that'll be successful ;) Moderator caps are supposed to be extra special ;)

Ælis

10:40 AM

@Tinkeringbell Yeah, that doesn't surprise me. I kind of imagine them being like super-heroes cap. You have "magical" powers and you only use them to do the good! :p

avazula

@Tinkeringbell I'm honestly waiting for a new moderator election round since HDE stepped back from his ... </crazy dreams expression> :p

Tinkeringbell

@avazula Well, we kinda decided that we didn't need an extra moderator. ;)

> The mod team has decided that for the immediate future, they'll be just fine without me and won't need a replacement moderator.

So I'm sorry to say there won't be any, not yet.

avazula

@Tinkeringbell I suspected that ;)

Ælis

@Tinkeringbell Aren't things likely to change with the HNQ return, though?

Tinkeringbell

@Ælis Ideally, a HNQ return will mean the community is ready for that, and there won't be extra work for us moderators.

I'm personally having a hard time seeing that happen though :(

avazula

10:46 AM

@Tinkeringbell seeing what happen?

Tinkeringbell

@avazula HNQ not being more moderator work.

avazula

The idealistic scenario?

Tinkeringbell

I'm a bit of the pessimist here

avazula

ha, right haha

Well I get you

Ælis

@Tinkeringbell Even if the community is ready, we will still gain more user and more user always mean more mod work, doesn't it?

Tinkeringbell

10:48 AM

@Ælis Like I said, in the best case, it doesn't.

Users can educate other users, that's not something you're going to need a moderator for.

Ælis

@Tinkeringbell Well then, I definitively don't believe in that "best case" either ^^'

@Tinkeringbell Yes, we can, but it still takes time before a user is "fully" educated :/

Tinkeringbell

Yeah, and there lies the problem... going back to HNQ will mean going back with a (very?) small group of core users, and ... well ... I'm kinda worrying it won't be enough and that it might undo all the progression we've made so far while off of HNQ

Looking at recent examples: interpersonal.stackexchange.com/questions/21311/… might have made HNQ. That's not good :/

interpersonal.stackexchange.com/q/21327/1599 (now deleted) got a really great edit from the community, but then no-one mentioned that it still didn't have the details or goal needed to get a proper answer :/

It also did not get any close-votes

avazula

@Tinkeringbell I think we do have a problem with how (community) moderation is going during the weekends

Tinkeringbell

@avazula It's definitely too slow for my liking. And it's only going to get worse if back on HNQ, I think.

avazula

@Tinkeringbell Maybe some new users will like the atmosphere, stick around and become community moderators? IDK

It's not likely, true

Tinkeringbell

10:55 AM

@avazula Yeah, that's a best-case scenario...

New people come in, are helped with (and willing to extend the effort to) make a great first post, and then stick around to help others...

Ælis

@Tinkeringbell I understand the worries. Don't have any good word or solutions though :/

Tinkeringbell

@Ælis Me neither, not yet.

Ælis

@avazula I just saw your edit <3

Tinkeringbell

That answer needs a citation needed comment.

Ælis

@Tinkeringbell If you are talking about that answer, I believe it's more efficient to put a link to it :p (also, it's my question and I already commented, so I won't do it again)

Tinkeringbell

11:09 AM

I mean, is that his personal opinion? his experience? a recommendation from some organisation that studies/handles such issues?

It could use a link to the citation expectations meta post

and a comment asking them to put a citation to the claim they're making that their way of wording is more authorative and thus better

A J

@Ælis I asked for Information Security swag, but they didn't seem to have it in the stock. :/

@Tinkeringbell which site did you wish the swag for?

Ælis

@AJ Arf, too bad for you :/ Honestly, I didn't think I would have had the chemistry mug but I did and I find it amazing and so very cool! :D

Right now, I really want to brag about my SE swag stuff but none of my coworkers asked me about it ><

Come on coworkers, I want to impress you!

Philbo

11:25 AM

@Tinkeringbell @Tinkeringbell Just looking to your comment about community moderation - what kind of things are expected?

A J

Philbo

woops didn't mean to double your name like that

Tinkeringbell

@Philbo You want the short or the long list? :P

@AJ Shame! You're not wearing your cap :)

Philbo

@Tinkeringbell whichever you have time for :)

Tinkeringbell

You look good :)

Ælis

11:26 AM

@AJ Waw, nice! Did you coworkers notice and were you able to brag? :p

A J

@Ælis yeah, one co-worker noticed. So, I told him what else I got. ;)

Tinkeringbell

@Philbo Well, the short list is help improve question and answer quality :P

A J

@Tinkeringbell heh! I am not outside. I wear cap outdoor. ;)

@Tinkeringbell Thank you. :)

Philbo

@Tinkeringbell By that do you mean more so spelling and grammar, or suggestions for changes if I don't think it answers the question? Or both?

Tinkeringbell

There's so much you can do, that the long list is likely overwhelming ;) You can downvote questions/answers that aren't good quality, comment, close vote, edit, flag... but each of those comes with it's own set of 'rules' ;)

Philbo

11:28 AM

ah ok

Tinkeringbell

@Philbo Oh, not just spelling and grammar. More an issue of content (both what you produce and what you steer others towards producing).

It's... if you want people to ask great questions, a good example is asking them yourselves

Philbo

I'm quite hesitant to downvote. Answers that have already been upvoted, it seems like there's no point, answers that are generally neutral I'd rather make a comment, and answers that are already downvoted...well there's not much point dogpiling :)

Tinkeringbell

If you want people to write great answers with citations instead of just opinions, we need examples that show these are going to be the best answers, the ones that get the most upvotes, and a contrast with those that aren't because those are downvoted

Ælis

@Philbo If you want to help moderate the site, I believe this might interest you (especially this link)

Philbo

@Ælis I can't tell if that's a joke that I should read it twice, or a mistake :D

Tinkeringbell

11:32 AM

@Philbo Downvoting is tricky, I know. But if we don't consistently meet bad content with downvotes, how are people going to know their content was bad? If we don't downvote and just leave a comment, and the post gets upvoted anyways, are people going to be willing to improve?

Ælis

@Philbo I edited the second link, it should be good now ><

Tinkeringbell

Also, downvotes eventually allow for community deletion, and IPS is a special case site where 'Not an answer' flags may be used for answers that aren't backed up like described here... Just to make sure we don't get a proliferation of bad answers anyways.

Philbo

I'll give the links a read and see if that changes the way I interact with the site :)

I think the only thing I'm quick to do is flag comments, and that comes from...I think a period where the mods made it clear to do so pretty quickly as they got very unwieldy and chatty on HNQs

Tinkeringbell

And that's still good too!

That still needs to happen now, or we're going back to HNQ and people are going to complain 'but you didn't do it while you weren't on here, so why is mine deleted now'

ElizB

12:19 PM

@Tinkeringbell thanks!! :)

@avazula thank you! :)

Good morning all.

A J

Good Evening!

doppelgreener

Good morning! o/

What's going on with the congrats? :O

A J

Happy wedding anniversary @ElizB :)

ElizB

@AJ thanks :)

@doppelgreener my 1st wedding anniversary was yesterday. :)

doppelgreener

Oh, wow! Congratulations. :D

ElizB

12:26 PM

Thanks!

@El'endiaStarman and I appreciate your love and congratulations. :)

avazula

1:01 PM

@ElizB we luv ya

@Ælis ♥

ElizB

Hehe thanks

Extroverted Main Man

0

Q: Can I still be intimate with a friend that cheated?

I've been close friends with this girl for at least 3 years, I found her attractive, and easy to be around, but seeing how I've had a bad track record with serious relationships up till then, I didn't try to make anything serious or too deep. Kept us just friends. When she broached the subject o...

friends relationships

0

Q: Husband Asked to Touch A Woman's Hair

My husband and I are both white. My husband recently asked a black woman if he could touch her hair. She said yes, and he was delighted. I was not there for this interaction, so I cannot judge her body language or inflection, but having read articles like this one: https://everydayfeminism.com/2...

united-states

Ælis

1:18 PM

@ExtrovertedMainMan I hope we won't have too many bad comments/answers to this question :/

Rainbacon

1:32 PM

@Ælis Oh boy. Yeah, that could attract some bad attention

avazula

I was kinda expecting people wouldn't agree with my HNQ suggestion ... but I'm curious as to which point people disagree with

Rainbacon

@avazula are you referring to this interpersonal.meta.stackexchange.com/a/3615/11659

avazula

@Rainbacon Hi! Yes indeed :)

Rainbacon

My personal disagreement with it is your suggestion for 3 questions. It feels a bit like "let's jump right back in where we were." What I think would be better would be easing our way back in

Tinkeringbell

@Rainbacon Especially because there isn't any information on where OP thinks the problem with their behaviours lies.

avazula

1:46 PM

@Tinkeringbell we kinda have an idea based on the tags used

@Rainbacon I understand your point of view. Thanks for sharing it.

Rainbacon

That actually makes me think of a possible enhancement for the comment bot. What if we could mark questions that we think have potential to attract bad comments. Then if a comment comes in on the marked post, the bot will automatically post it here regardless of if it tripped one of the regexes

avazula

@Rainbacon that could be a nice feature, but ... how would you mark the potentially problematic questions? Would it be human interaction or AI-based scripts?

Tinkeringbell

@avazula Do we? See my comments. I don't see an answer to that in the tags :/

Ælis

@avazula I was the one who added the tags. The only one that was there before my edit was "united-state"

avazula

@Ælis oh... that makes more sense now.

@Tinkeringbell well, based on the article linked and that question: "How can I address this microaggression with him in a way that won't hurt his feelings? He and I are both very liberal, and I know he didn't mean anything rude (and certainly nothing racist), but good intentions don't preclude offense." I think OP wants to tell their husband they think they acted inappropriately w/o them being hurt

IPS Comment Bot

1:54 PM

"Am I worrying about it too much?" Is not something we can answer for you. As a first step, decide what it is that you are actually worrying about. Do you want advice on how to tell her you don't want to sleep with her anymore but still be friends. — Philbo 8 secs ago

Matched regex(es) ["possible-aic"]

Tinkeringbell

@avazula Yes, but what makes them think the husband may be hurt when they 'just use their words'?

What should an answer keep in mind here, to avoid 'hurting' the husband?

We can't mindread. So even though we might answer with the best intentions, we can't back up that the husband wouldn't be hurt because we don't know why OP is afraid they're going to hurt their husband with telling them this

Rainbacon

@avazula I would imagine human interaction. Basically what we would be saying is "I think this could attract bad comments, I want to watch it more carefully"

Mithrandir

@IPSCommentBot fp

IPS Comment Bot

Marked this comment as caught incorrectly (fp). Currently marked 0tps/1fps

avazula

@Tinkeringbell I agree that it's missing what was tried or what makes them think that simply telling them couldn't work

@Rainbacon that could work ... but that demands quite a lot of work IMO

i don't mind it, but what do other users think about it?

Tinkeringbell

2:02 PM

@avazula Yep. And in such cases, people are much more likely to focus on 'don't tell him' or 'just tell him' and the part about microagressions, because there's now a lot of side things to focus on and little interpersonal skills

Rainbacon

@avazula Why do you say it demands quite a lot of work?

Tinkeringbell

That's why such questions always seem to get a fair share of nasty

avazula

@Tinkeringbell sadly true ...

@Rainbacon well, say it demands either to enter a specific parameter to our bot or writing a canned comment. Every single time. That's a significant supplementary workload. Plus, you suggest every comment ends up in this chat (or did you mean the Closet?). It could seriously disrupt the conversational flow or demand users to watch the Closet for yet another thing. Again, I wouldn't mind, but would the others?

Rainbacon

I was thinking of something along the lines of a chat message like, "hey IPSCommentBot, watch 12345" where 12345 is the question id. It's not a huge extra effort. I do see the point about disruption to the flow of conversation though. Also, every comment gets logged to the closet already, so I supposed anyone that wanted to watch it could go there

avazula

@Rainbacon we're not that much people watching the Closet ...

Currently we're 5 people in it

@Rainbacon Please be assured I'm not saying that's a bad idea :)

I'm really looking forward for us to go back to HNQ but I understand the fears and potential issues

Ælis

2:21 PM

@Rainbacon Since you are here, may I ask you to add the comment Tinkeringbell talked about in here? Since I'm the OP of the question (and already posted another comment), I don't really want to do it ^^'

> is that his personal opinion? his experience? a recommendation from some organisation that studies/handles such issues?
It could use a link to the citation expectations meta post
and a comment asking them to put a citation to the claim they're making that their way of wording is more authorative and thus better

Rainbacon

Sure, I can do that

TheTinyMan

yaaawn Morning everyone! :-)

Ælis

@TheTinyMan Hello one person! :p

(this joke works far much better in French :p)

TheTinyMan

@Ælis It worked well enough in English, too, I think! :-) How are you?

Rainbacon

@Ælis Done, even flagged it as NAA

Ælis

2:29 PM

@Rainbacon Thanks :)

Rainbacon

No problem

Ælis

@TheTinyMan Great I believe. I receive two boxes of goodies from SE today :D

TheTinyMan

@Ælis Oooohhh, goodies? :o

Ælis

4 hours ago, by Ælis

@Tinkeringbell Too many things! A lot of stickers (stack overflow, stack exchange, superuser, server fault, chemistry), two bottles (one thermos, the other not), two "super user" pen, Two t-shirt (one TWP, the other SE), four(!) notebooks, one workplace stapler (I keep wanting using it, but I have nothing to staple ><), I super cool chemistry mug that I asked for my sister (but I kind of want to keep it now :p ) and I things it's about all ^^

avazula

2:45 PM

@Ælis Bonjour tout.e seul.e !

Ælis

@avazula Héhé :p <3

TheTinyMan

@Ælis That's exciting! :-D You can always just put staples in a piece of paper for, like, artistic purposes or something!

Ælis

@TheTinyMan I want to do that sooooo much, but clips are a limited resource and I don"t want to issue them without purpose ><

TheTinyMan

@Ælis Hmm, that's fair. Maybe you can spare one? :o

Ælis

@TheTinyMan Please don't tempt me ><

I regret not receiving the thing that does hole instead of clips, I would have been able to make holes everywhere!

TheTinyMan

2:58 PM

@Ælis Haha, I'll stop being a bad influence! ;-)

hahahaha, I love hole punches! xD Although, man, those holes get everywhere!

Man, there are so many bad jokes begging to be made here...

avazula

politeness police lurking around

:p

TheTinyMan

@avazula :o Where?? looks about the room frantically

avazula

Pickaboo!

TheTinyMan

Ahh! tries to hide behind the stapler

avazula

@TheTinyMan Lucky for you you're a tiny man...

TheTinyMan

3:02 PM

@avazula It is, isn't it? Were I larger I'd have a hard time hiding here! ;-)

Ælis

@TheTinyMan Destroying paper with adapted tools always feel very good, IMO :p

avazula

@TheTinyMan You could hide behind AElis ... I mean, they're a tree

TheTinyMan

I could probably also hide behind you. You're Bean, so you're sure to attract attention and keep eyes off me!

Or maybe I can hide behind you both. That seems ideal!

@Ælis has a pretty slender trunk it looks like, I'm not sure that that'd be a good hiding spot either!

avazula

#Avaelis

3

TheTinyMan

@avazula Everyone's favorite ship? ;-)

avazula

3:05 PM

Darn that's a real name

TheTinyMan

Of course it is, it's you two! ;-)

avazula

@TheTinyMan No I mean, that's a company's and real people's names

TheTinyMan

@avazula I know, I'm being silly. :-)

avazula

@TheTinyMan but we are real

scohe001

@avazula I'm trying to pun this...something like "...to no avail" but it just doesn't work :(

avazula

3:09 PM

French IPS heroes realness

TheTinyMan

@avazula Are you? :o Here I was thinking you were just names, icons, and personalities on a screen!

avazula

@scohe001 Can't work every time ;) hi pal!

@TheTinyMan Deep down, I'm a blue agender creature whose spirit animal is a cat and who feeds from your words and puns (which explains why I'm delighted by that yellow square's punchlines)

Ælis

@avazula Of course they are! Who wouldn't want such a beautiful name? After all, it represents the sun and the wonders of the word <3

scohe001

@avazula what do you call an Islamic girl without a burqa?

TheTinyMan

@avazula Hmm. So are all of my words being eaten? :o

scohe001

3:12 PM

Avaelis Arab!

Bleh. That's the best I can do

Ælis

@scohe001 I didn't understand ^^"

avazula

@scohe001 I ... didn't get it ._. I'm so sorry dear

scohe001

A veil-less Arab

Ha. Ha ha. Ha.

avazula

scohe001

It was a stretch...

avazula

3:14 PM

#BigBrotherIsWatchingMe

@scohe001 HAAAAAAAA

@scohe001 I GET IT NOW

@scohe001 HAHAHAHAHA

@scohe001 I DON'T FEEL DUMB ANYMORE

scohe001

LOL don't worry, I don't think anyone else got it either. I was reaching too hard

avazula

@scohe001 It's okay, it's Monday

Mithrandir

(I got it. I wasn't saying anything though.)

TheTinyMan

@scohe001 It went over my head too, but then I am Tiny and things do that. ;-)

scohe001

@TheTinyMan hahaha well played

avazula

3:16 PM

@Mithrandir You're here! yay!

Rainbacon

I could use some advice on best courses of action with this answer. I don't want this to turn into a long comment thread. I've considered inviting the user to chat, but I don't think that's going to do much good. I've already flagged the post and downvoted. Is there any other course of action that I can or should be taking here?

Mithrandir

@avazula I'm here?? :O I didn't know that!

TheTinyMan

@avazula Soon Big Brother is going to start talking about #avaelis

@Mithrandir Right in @avazula's front door probably

avazula

@TheTinyMan Nah, if Mith were here, they would already be in my living room eating freshly-baked cookies and with Fedora on their knees

Ælis

@Rainbacon Unfortunately, I'm not sure there is much you could do here :/ Maybe inviting the user to "edit that into your answer" but, otherwise, I don't know

avazula

3:20 PM

I actually bought two chairs this weekend, so they'd be in one of thesse

TheTinyMan

@avazula ... okay, Politeness Police, I'm struggling to interpret the "on their knees" part there.

@avazula Ahhhh, not enough seating, that makes sense now!

avazula

@Rainbacon I'd flag for people to handle it instead.

@TheTinyMan Fedora's my cat's name :)

TheTinyMan

@avazula Ohhhhh, I figured you were going to geek out about Linux!

avazula

@TheTinyMan Naah, that's my cat :)

You thought I had some sort of dirty jokes in the back of my head? Shame!

Ælis

@TheTinyMan Haha, I'm so used to @avazula cat's name that I didn't understand what you were struggling with x)

TheTinyMan

3:23 PM

@avazula What can I say? I grew up poor, I'm never far from the gutter!

Mithrandir

@TheTinyMan I use Ubuntu in any case, so I've already been initiated into the Linux cult

avazula

@Ælis Naming my cat Fedora was pure genius, if you ask me. My partner and I are thinking of rescuing another one. We fought on their name... I lost, soon you'll meet Kali

(I wanted Debian)

@TheTinyMan If you were a tiny man, then weren't you afraid of the gutter cats? ;)

TheTinyMan

@avazula I'm really curious to see the battle that ensued wherein you lost. Did you lose a battle of stubbornness? :o

avazula

(Maybe that only works in French, if so, I'm sorry!)

TheTinyMan

@avazula Sure was! :-P

@avazula It worked on at least some level in English. If I'm tiny then it stands to reason that cats might eat me. :-)

Ælis

3:25 PM

@avazula I believe you already told me about wanting to name all your cat with this "system" :p

avazula

well, it approximately went that way:
- "It's gonna be Kali!"
- "Oh no, but I wanted Debian!"
- "Nah, Debian's an ugly name. Kali's cute! Kali will be a hacker"

TheTinyMan

@Ælis Once upon a time, I had named all of my animals after Final Fantasy characters. The partner I had when I got my current dog insisted on breaking that pattern. >.<

@avazula Kali IS a cuter name, but

do you know where the name Debian came from?

avazula

@TheTinyMan I do not, what's the origin?

Ælis

@TheTinyMan Breaking your pattern must have been a difficult decision to make

TheTinyMan

@avazula Apparently the guy who wrote it was named "Ian," and his...wife or girlfriend, I don't remember which...was named Debbie.

avazula

3:27 PM

@TheTinyMan woaaaa

TheTinyMan

So right now my headcanon is that you guys are gonna write your own Linux distro. ;-)

avazula

That means we can launch software and name it Avaelis then!

TheTinyMan

@avazula Yup!

Do it!

Rainbacon

@Ælis I thought about that, but I don't think that it properly backs up the answer.

avazula

@TheTinyMan I think we'd be more likely to write some testing suite in which the bugs and issues raised by the Q&A engineer are mandatorily fixed by the devs within 2 days otherwise it makes the program crash

@Ælis ^

TheTinyMan

3:29 PM

@avazula Heyyyy wait a minute! :-P

Mithrandir

Ælis

@avazula Haha, dev probably won't be happy about that XD

avazula

@Ælis Yeah. But we would be.

:p

Ælis

@Rainbacon It isn't but it's better than nothing and people tend to add more details when they edit something into their answer (but not always)

@avazula Hehe Evil laugh

TheTinyMan

@Ælis Noooooo! D: The evil Avaelis must be stopped! Which is a great name for a villain, by the way. ;-)

Ælis

3:34 PM

@TheTinyMan But careful or your evilness will mute you out of this chatroom! grrrrrrr

TheTinyMan

@Ælis :o The bugs want to be freeeeee!

Tinkeringbell

@Ælis I dropped a comment there as well now.

avazula

@Ælis I actually never muted anyone ... for now. Muahahah

TheTinyMan

@avazula Eep!

avazula

Watch out ... ;)

IPS Comment Bot

3:48 PM

My first thought was: look autistic? You didn't tell them what you look like but what you are. Next time ask them about their name and say "oh you don't look like [name]... but like autism this is nothing one can see". — puck 1 min ago

Matched regex(es) ["possible-aic"]

avazula

@IPSCommentBot tp

IPS Comment Bot

Marked this comment as caught correctly (tp). Currently marked 1tps/0fps. beep boop My human overlords won't let me flag that, so you'll have to do it yourself.

TheTinyMan

4:27 PM

@avazula disguises self as tree

Rainbacon

4:45 PM

Hey @Ælis, my IPS rep is currently 3223!

TheTinyMan

@Rainbacon Ooh, a numerical palindrome!

I wonder if there's a special word for that?

Ælis

@Rainbacon Wow, nice! Mine has nothinng remarcable, unfortunately

ElizB

5:02 PM

Need advice on a really, really tricky situation. >.< So, the agency for my interpreter services is really, really just... unethical. the interpreters provided are great but dealing with the lady who runs the agency is just... ugh. frustrating. She assigned a crappy interpreter that I know for my major presentation on april first and I told her NO. the disability resource center defended the agency lady and said that interpreter is the only one available and you should accept and I said No.

TheTinyMan

@ElizB That sounds really crappy. :-( I wish I had advice.

ElizB

That interpreter is way too unethical, unprofessional and she embarrassed herself by basically sneering at my other interpreter and touching and pressing her hands down to indicate to her that she should stop chatting idly with me... class was on break and was just starting and she's like presses my other interpreter's hands down signs "my turn", starts interpreting while me and K. my other interpreter just stare at each other not sure what to do

but here's the thing. my email exchange:

Rainbacon

@ElizB May I ask how the interpreter is unethical?

TheTinyMan

@ElizB wooooow...that's the equivalent of like forcibly covering someone's mouth. That's messed up.

Rainbacon

I'm also a bit confused as to why she was there if you had another interpreter

ElizB

5:07 PM

My email exchange:
Agency: I do need a definite answer to this question -- if (unethical interpreter) is the only interpreter available................. would you rather not have an interpreter than to work with (unethical interpreter)?
Me: I would rather not work with (unethical interpreter). She has shown herself to not be a good match for me. This presentation will be in front of my peers at school, and I do not need an interpreter that does not behave professionally.
Agency: The answer I need you to give me is: would accept (unethical interpreter) or prefer to have no one. If it come…

@Rainbacon that one time she was subbing for my other usual interpreter- I usually have a team of two

@TheTinyMan So. Messed. Up. So rude. I couldnt believe it. I told the agency to never assign me lori again.

@Rainbacon Doesn't dress correctly for the job, wears crocs, behaves like what I just described, the "greater than thou" attitude, etc

ugh.

thing is, she already released the unethical interpreter from the request, meaning she is not available anymore... so why go on and send me something like that???

it's just incomprehensible how some people behave...

TheTinyMan

@ElizB It seems like a valid question to me, the agency wants to know if you'd rather have no interpreter if no other is available? Or am I missing something?

ElizB

the agency is also unethical, my mom is an interpreter and shes had many situations where the agency did not give her all the information needed for the job.

TheTinyMan

@ElizB Geez :-\

ElizB

@TheTinyMan I don't want to say I prefer having no interpreter when there is nobody else... i don't want her to twist my words and say that I don't need an interpreter at all if no one that works with her is available.

Rainbacon

@ElizB This might seem nit-picky, but I don't think unethical is the right word. Everything you've mentioned seems very unprofessional, but I don't see any ethical issues with their behavior.

ElizB

5:13 PM

my mom has caught her in multiple lies- once she was giving interpreting jobs to this guy so that he could work... but it turns out that he was renting an apartment from her..... she was giving him work so that he could pay the rent to her!!!

@Rainbacon it's got to do with the interpreter code of conduct.

Rainbacon

I will admit, I'm not familiar with the code of conduct

ElizB

lemmee see if I can pull it up. it's long and boring but I know for sure that interpreter agencies are NOT supposed to do "inside jobs" or behave like that with clients or other interpreters.

I'm getting an interpreter friend of mine to advise, but later tonight because she's working. so I'll get advice from her. Any IPS skills I could apply?

Rainbacon

Unfortunately, if all the other interpreters are busy, you may not have many options. You could ask the service to not pair you with her, and I suppose you could suggest that they switch her assignments with another interpreter, but based on what you've told us, I don't think that is likely to succeed

ElizB

@Rainbacon They can also find an interpreter from a different agency and contract out to that interpreter. There's a reason why there's not that many interpreters available, the small pool of people she's got can put up with her, but the majority of interpreters in this area can't. therefore I see reason to look for interpreters in other agencies.

I did email that to the disability resource center, without the agency involved. Here's the thing, it's spring break. they're probably closed.

I also don't expect much from them because they defended the agency saying what you said, but it is also my right as a deaf person to say that this interpreter is not a good match for me. therefore, no one is available that is a good match for me.

no one working for the agency is a good match for me, that is.

Rainbacon

Do you have the option to work with a different agency?

ElizB

5:20 PM

the school hired the wrooooong agency.

Rainbacon

Ah

ElizB

the school hires only one agency to manage the interpreter requests for deaf students.

that's why it's not easy to find interpreters because they made a contract with only one

and probably the worst one in the area.

my last semester. oi. I'll be glad to be done with it.

Extroverted Main Man

5:34 PM

-1

Q: How can I keep something going with a girl I met at a bar?

I met a girl on Friday, at a bar. She approached me while I was ordering drinks and we hit it off. She spent the entire remaining night talking to me away from her friends. This girl was very attractive, and if she hadn't approached me I wouldnt even talk to her. We spent the night 12-2am talking...

relationships

Rainbacon

Sorry that we couldn't be of more assistance. And sorry that you've got to deal with that

IPS Comment Bot

She deleted you on the snapchat, that's pretty explicit. Did she give you the facebook or you found it? Only you can decide that, but are you sure that she is "the one"? It's easy to feel like this with every girl when you are single for a long time. The fact that this happened at a bar also makes me think you should not take it too seriously. Maybe you should take it as a practice shot. — Manuki 2 mins ago

Matched regex(es) ["possible-aic(@Noon)"]

Rainbacon

@IPSCommentBot tp

IPS Comment Bot

Marked this comment as caught correctly (tp). Currently marked 1tps/0fps. beep boop My human overlords won't let me flag that, so you'll have to do it yourself.

Also by the way, if you write to her, do not write anything about "deleting me", don't write "i'm not usually persistent", and don't write "if not, i understand, i won't blow up your phone..blablabla", all these give a really weak impression, you should not be a creep and you should not appear desperate. Stick to the important part of your message if you really want to send something, be straight to the point and nothing else. These things that I quoted and self-evident, you don't need to tell her, especially not in text. — Manuki 37 secs ago

Matched regex(es) ["possible-aic", "possible-aic(@Noon)"]

Rainbacon

@IPSCommentBot tp

IPS Comment Bot

5:39 PM

Marked this comment as caught correctly (tp). Currently marked 1tps/0fps. beep boop My human overlords won't let me flag that, so you'll have to do it yourself.

ElizB

5:57 PM

@Rainbacon It's okay. I've just left the email so I can think

IPS Comment Bot

if it's your party at your place, i would suggest standing up and being firm and honest. "guys, you are ruining the party, come on". If they are your friends you should be able to talk equal to equal. Do not put yourself in danger if you feel someone is out of control. — Manuki 19 secs ago

Matched regex(es) ["possible-aic(@Noon)"]

TheTinyMan

I love that I live in a world where I can passionately argue about the literary elements and conclusions of a video game like Bioshock.

Rainbacon

@IPSCommentBot tp

IPS Comment Bot

Marked this comment as caught correctly (tp). Currently marked 1tps/0fps. beep boop My human overlords won't let me flag that, so you'll have to do it yourself.

Rainbacon

6:13 PM

Quick question. In the past hour or so I've flagged 3 comments by the same user, (and am about to flag a 4th) all as NLN because they are answers in comments. Is there a point where I should use a custom flag instead to bring it to the attention of the mods?

Tinkeringbell

Sure, if you see people on some kind of answering in comments spree, feel free to let us know. Especially if it's a new user, we can reach out to them :)

Rainbacon

@Tinkeringbell what's a good threshold for that?

Tinkeringbell

@Rainbacon Ehhh. Never thought about that much. ;-)

Mithrandir

Three in a short while, six if spread out is what I do

...or did, haven't been doing much lately

Rainbacon

Seems reasonable

Mithrandir

6:20 PM

*ticks "earn a high school diploma" off of to-do list*

Tinkeringbell

@Mithrandir Congrats!!!!

Told you you'd do fine ;)

Rainbacon

@Tinkeringbell I'm guessing you can figure out which user I'm talking about based on the flag queue

TheTinyMan

@Mithrandir Nice! How long is that to-do list now? ;-)

Mithrandir

Heh. Didn't pass amazingly but passed ;)

Rainbacon

@Mithrandir Congrats!

Mithrandir

6:21 PM

@TheTinyMan Fairly long... next up: fill out questionnaire for army

But yeah, that's definitely taken one major stress factor out of the equation.

Tinkeringbell

@Rainbacon Ehh, no comment flags there

IPS Comment Bot

Please don't use comments to post answers Comments are intended to be used to ask for clarification and suggest improvements. Additionally, using them to answer the question bypasses our quality control measures as comments can't be downvoted. — Rainbacon 45 secs ago

Rainbacon

Oh, the most recent comment was deleted, must have been auto deleted

IPS Comment Bot

Matched regex(es) ["chatty"]

Rainbacon

If it happens again I'll use a custom flag

It's been a long time since I've used so many flags in a day. Did we secretly go back on HNQ? :P

Anilla

6:42 PM

Is it just me... or do ya'll also have like a unique feeling attached to different memories? lol

Rainbacon

@Anilla I think so, but can you describe what you're talking about?

TheTinyMan

@Anilla My sentiments echo @Rainbacon's exactly :-)

Anilla

It's difficult to describe. Like you can recount a memory from the past and sort of feel everything that happened in it as a whole unique feeling.

TheTinyMan

@Anilla Unique, as in, different from how it felt at the time? Or as in, different from all of your other memories?

Anilla

@TheTinyMan Well unique as in it's a feeling that transcends all standard ones. It's not sad, not happy, not angry, not depressed, not joyful, not annoyed, etc.

TheTinyMan

6:50 PM

@Anilla Ahhhh, I see. It's a feeling that you only get, while thinking back on certain kinds of memories?

Anilla

@TheTinyMan Yup! Exactly.

TheTinyMan

Nostalgia? Satisfaction? Fulfillment?

I feel like there's another good one that I'm missing :-p

Rainbacon

@Anilla So, I get that, but I think of those feelings as just others in the set of all feelings rather than some sort of transcendent state

Anilla

@Rainbacon I consider them transcendental because they are entirely unique and resolved by the inner workings of one person. They go beyond feelings we can relate towards one another. Happiness and sadness, for example, are relatively similar amongst different individuals.

@TheTinyMan Nostalgia wouldn't really describe these feelings I have either. It's not that I wish to revisit the past or anything... more so that I just feel it. Argh, it's hard to describe lol

Rainbacon

Are they though? Can you explain to me what it is like for you to feel happiness?

TheTinyMan

6:57 PM

@Anilla Is it, like...a feeling that this memory makes sense now, that you're glad it happened because of the effect it has had on your present?

Anilla

@Rainbacon Of course, there is always going to be variation. But since this emotional response is so uniformly present in society we have words and descriptions for it... since it's pretty relatable for most people.

Like I can tell you, "I'm super happy right now, yay!" and you would understand. But if I said I can feel ABC feeling you've never experienced before you wouldn't understand

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