@TheTinyMan Yea, that's the character I played as when I was younger and had the original Wii. I'm not sure if he's still around in the newer ones or if anything changed lol.
@TheTinyMan I never got good enough with those on Melee for it to matter, but I played Smash with my coworkers a few times shortly after the game came out and I really enjoyed it. Despite getting wrecked by everyone else, who had Switches when I don't.
@El'endiaStarman Haha, yeah, that would do it! At a place I used to work a couple of years ago, 4-8 of us would get together every day to play Melee, then we switched to Project M. It was amazing. I was probably the second or third best among us...but the best among us plays in tournaments regularly. Won one last weekend, too!
@scohe001 They stopped developing three days after announcing an upcoming feature list, too. It's kind of accepted in the Smash community - or at least it was - that Nintendo finally found an appropriate hammer to put down.
@TheTinyMan there was a whole lot of drama around it, but I think once the smoke cleared it ended up being that they dropped it to start their own game dev company and make their own original game (which flopped terribly). I don't think there was any nintendo involvement
@ElizB Thank you! :-) I thought you were having fun but I don't remember teasing y'all this heavily before and like to throw such a disclaimer out early on.
@TheTinyMan like i don't mind saying one or two things about that kind of feminist thing then just moving on from there
like have a laugh knowing that we have better standards than the old days, that kind of thing. like thinking "oh these were the days of saying these things were ok"
Gotcha. :-) It's weird how my opinions on these kinds of things have changed over the years. Like, as a kid, I would never have thought that a joke about women or minorities was okay, then in college I met people who were the subjects in such jokes, making them ironically - they'd make a 'woman joke' where the actual humor was the thought 'some idiots think this way,' and we're not making fun of the woman in the joke, we're making fun of the POV from which the joke was made.
So then I started making those jokes a little too, offended people who thought the target of the joke was the pers…
Yeah, that's good. Mine are 35 and 27, so they at least are stable. The 35 year old hasn't had a stable relationship in a long time (got pregnant from a casual thing) but at least she has a job where she can support kids. The other is married and they're pretty stable financially. Both on their second kids
Background
My fiancee and I recently had a small argument over the following text exchange
F: I wish I could have seen you tonight.
Me: I would have liked to see you tonight too.
F: I always want to see you.
Me: I know you do
F: You're supposed to say you always want to s...
@Rainbacon I'm surprised that you got to upvote and zero close vote yet. But I'm still afraid that your question might be closed. If this isn't the case by tomorrow, I think I will add a new tag to all your "why" questions
@Ælis it doesn't need closing then. We explain skills as well as recommend them... So now we need to carefully watch the answers and moderate them for back up, instead of opinion
@Ælis Even academic research seems pretty shaky on this one (it's asking for a conclusion regarding an extremely broad type of behavior). Anything that fits the question-as-asked seems like it'll be extremely reductive and filled with assumptions
I'm trying to write an answer to this based on extremely similar conversations I've had with my significant other and her thoughts on them. It's kinda hard to back it up, though, other than saying "Well, this is what my significant other meant by her remarks, what the subtext was, and why certain responses did or did not work".
@HDE226868 Exactly. We can explain practical heuristics which might help address similar behaviors, along with tentative reasons why we think those are valuable, but they fit poorly as answers for "why [x]
It would seem to me as though someone could answer the question coming from experience on the other side of the coin. Something like "I expect recriprocation because of X, Y, and Z"
It's also a good candidate for a frame challenge. In the question I've made the assumption that there is a social convention around this. I think it would be perfectly valid for an answerer to assert that there is in fact not a social convention for this and provide reasoning for why such a convention does not exist
@Rainbacon That might do, but is it really different from opinion? "People want [x] because I observe myself wanting [x] and attach these things to it" is as subjective as it gets
And there is social convention around interactions like this one (though it's hard to typify definitively, one way or another), but it's hard to know what your fiancée thinks and wants.
Would a frame challenge allow for changing the question to be about social conventions which apply work?
@Upper_Case My question is in no way asking what my fiancee thinks or wants. I talked with her at length about the situation and I know exactly what she wants. My question is about the social convention in play, which you've just confirmed does exist
@Rainbacon More than one convention exists. I don't know if your fiancée expected you to respond because she felt the back-and-forth pattern was established over the last several exchanges, or because she assumed that your response could only come from radically different feelings than she held (and that that difference surprised her), or because your response seemed (to her) to disregard her profession of her feelings
I know a couple whose method of expressing affection is to mercilessly roast each other in public discord
user15026
This is trying to take a complex dynamic that could be for a myriad of reasons and distill it down into an answerable thing that fits in the space that SE provides for answers, and ....I am not sure that's entirely possible
There are conventions around generally agreeing with people in your social group, conventions around delivering a prompted response, conventions around romantic relationships and dialogue concerning them, conventions around discussing an irritation, conventions everywhere. Most specifics of interaction are social convention
As I said in my comment, I think that this is a good and valuable question, just not one that fits SE well as currently written.
what I found is that sometimes people just want to be told their feelings are valid and right. Even if they can see right through the obvious trickery. Even if it's blatantly pandering. It still works despite all that
@Rainbacon The answer seems useful and thoughtful. But if we're to be policing questions and answers more carefully, as seems to be the feeling on meta, that standard may not be sufficient
@Upper_Case Woah! That goes both ways! Perhaps this is a good enough question then. It already has one experience based answer and HDE is writing a second
Though perhaps @Ash had a point when pointing out the complex dynamic part
I wonder if narrowing this down to interactions between romantic partners could make it more answerable - or at least distill those dynamics down to a small enough set that they can be adequately addressed in a single answer.
@Upper_Case There's a whole lot of thoughts on this specific question in here. And it may eventually have an effect on site scope, so a meta asking 'is this salvageable, does it need to be changed or not, is this unfit' for this specific question might be a good idea
@HDE226868 That may work
user15026
@HDE226868 It could be a trauma response, a self-doubt response, a "we are a coupel therefore we have to agree on everything" response, a validation seeking response....so many things.
user15026
7:52 PM
This site is good at reminding me that people are varying and complicated and trying to instill a sense of sameness to any sort of experience is all but impossible
user15026
(Like people trying to compare immigration timelines based on "oh we submitted the same style of application from the same country" as if there's not infinite reasons that the apps would take different times to process)
I recently had a long personal talk with a friend.
Shortly thereafter, I found out that my friend had shared details of our conversation with one of his other friends (who is an acquaintance of mine).
I confronted my friend, and asked him why he shared the details of our conversation without as...
I'm posting this in response to a recent question which sparked some discussion in chat and comments, but the issue I want to talk about is broader. I'm also not intending to pick on this question or its asker, and have OK-ed this meta post with the question author (though if I've overstepped, pl...
Background
My fiancee and I recently had a small argument over the following text exchange
F: I wish I could have seen you tonight.
Me: I would have liked to see you tonight too.
F: I always want to see you.
Me: I know you do
F: You're supposed to say you always want to s...
I recently had a long personal talk with a friend.
Shortly thereafter, I found out that my friend had shared details of our conversation with one of his other friends (who is an acquaintance of mine).
I confronted my friend, and asked him why he shared the details of our conversation without as...
