Oh guys, I finally found a solution for making my colleagues stop those rude jokes. It appears that they have a very high opinion of themselves and their knowledge, and I won't teach you anything if I say French language is a very difficult one ... So I told them about an spelling test
that way, the next time one of 'm asks you for something stupid you can just make fun of him with things like: "says the guy who doesn't even know how to spell correctly"
My girlfriend has a habit of thinking of scenarios that will never happen and then asking me a question about them usual about our relationship and then getting upset if i dont answer correctly.
One such example is:
We were watching an episode of doctor who an she asked, If we were both
m...
@Cashbee "How to tell girlfriend that I don't like hypothetical and silly questions?" sounds judgmental to me. OP thinks their SO's questions are silly, but do we?
I am currently job hunting and have recently applied for a role in Berlin and I live in the UK, the job advert offered paid relocation.
They have just reached out offering me an interview at their office in Berlin within the next few days. I do currently have a job, so it's not easy for me to ju...
I have a friend whose wife is like that. They've been together for something like 5 months now. They're already married, because she thinks that's the most romantic thing ever and constantly gets him to swear eternal love to her. I think it's cringeworthy. I've been together for over 4 years now, but we're not even engaged!
@Belle-Sophie eh, it can work. Friend of mine started to date a girl at 17 and married her when they both turned 18 (they were a month apart). I think they're going on 19 years of marriage now
@Magisch Yep. Not saying that it doesn't. I'm personally not that in a hurry, tbh. Since we live together now and Brexit is bringing uncertainty, we're probably getting married soon.
on the one hand it's sad that you have to marry when it's not on your own terms. On the other hand marriage shouldn't really change much to how you live together with your SO in the first place so why not?
Then again, I can't speak from experience yet on how marriage changes your relationship :)
ask me again in a couple of months if it's still important/relevant then :p
I almost had a fight with my SO yesterday about this though :p I told her something similar to "I hope things are different after we're married" where she gave me this "You what now?" look XD After I explained myself further that we're both not handling the stress of moving and planning the wedding that well and I hope things go back to how it was before the stress she fully agreed with me though :)
@Belle-Sophie Mah, I think he's doing it on purpose, to annoy me è_é
And to answer your previous question @Cashbee, it may actually be a very personal reason. I'm someone who always find an excuse to a behavior, no matter how bad it is, so their GF's hypothetical questions may be silly to them but we actually don't know why she's asking him this. By describing them as silly, it seems OP is not very willing to try to understand their GF's reasons to do so and it personally dissuades me from helping them.
But if it doesn't shock anybody else, then it's just me and again, that's totally ok. I'm just trying to avoid sounding judgmental (as much as I can) when asking/answering/commenting on IPS because to me, it's not our role.
I recall the time a French guy asked for help about his cat situation (the cat was returning home only to eat and poop and this was bothering him), and he wanted to give them to the neighbor who was taking care of them. If you're asking me, that's terrible to think of an animal as something you can give away. Many people told him in their answers. I didn't.
I'm heading for lunch too. Bon appétit to all, and bone appetite to my dear @M.A.R.ಠ_ಠ ;). CYL!
@avazula ah. I understand that. but yes this is why "we are not here to judge". If op thinks the questions are silly, let him write that in his question
@Belle-Sophie Is your desk big enough to fit 2 boxes on it? If not, you'll have to settle for 1 cat or learn to live with cats using your keyboard as a bed
@avazula No moving plans yet. My front door ends in the rooftop garden, which is closed off with a door to the elevator. I'm afraid it might get stuck in the elevator area and not know how to come back.
@Cashbee Be careful, you're on the line of what's allowed in this chat :D
But I get it :)
@Marcus Chapman is a psychologist, marriage counselor and writer. He's published a lot of books about romance relationships and marriage. The 5 Love languages is a theory he authored which claims that we express love and feel loved in different ways.
this is what i meant with may soudn strange (and I wanted it to sound like that >:)). I don't mean as in sexual intercourse. any physical contact. Caressing my SO is my favorite hobby
@Cashbee My GF doesn't like hugging as much as I do :( I compensate by hugging everyone else I can withing socially accepted boundries (like nieces/nephews, good female friends, sisters, ...
@avazula i just wanted to comment on the top voted answer "OP explicitly said "without resorting to corny eternal-lover's oaths"" but then I realized that I edited that part in. fml
As a native of your neighbor nation of bread connoisseurs I find this question really strange. A bakery could sell me stale bread exactly once. Most people I know would suffer any hardships to avoid buying stale bread. A baker selling old bread without informing the customers runs quickly out of business. The baker is offending you and you should tell them in no uncertain terms. — Roland5 secs ago
In this kind of conversations what matters is intention , if Op's intention is just to show his SO that he loves her, it's fine to play along on the game she's proposing, even if he doesn't know because the idea of the game, is just feeling loved and beeing cared of. I personally agree with OP that those games are rather foolish and pointless but then, why make such a big deal of it? — Alexander Aeons Torn27 secs ago
you actually feel more loved when your so knows what type you are and can reassure you their love in that way. Theres a caveat too - they can now manipulate you better. even if they no longer love you, they can use your love language to make you think they still do
@Cashbee I think it's interesting. It indeed is a risk you take. But I personally think that love is already a risk to be hurt in some way
I'm actually more eager to know how to please my SO rather than knowing they know how to tell me
I tend to show my love with numerous gifts but my SO is not that sensitive to it. So I'm currently trying to find a compromise between how he likes to be shown he's loved and how I like to show my love.
@Cashbee i have read the 5 love languages with my husband, and it's helped a ton even when me and hubby already felt that we understood each other well.
@Imus i highly reccomend it. It doesnt have to be when youre in a relationship, it's an applicable concept to any relationship- family, friends, relatives, etc
I got baptised quite late in my life (my mom let me choose) so I have fresh memories of religion class. One thing that particularly stroke me is the force of the christian wedding. My parents broke up right after my birth so the idea of people trying to make it work through adversity, to understand the other and support them no matter that, really rang a bell in me
I'm not likely to get one someday though, as SO is an atheist haha
Yeah that's what me and hubby are working on. We choose this instead of we feel love. That honeymoon feeling fades but dedication to each other's futures has not faded
@avazula I'm an attheist myself. But I do believe in the Christian values (just not that there's a god judging me for them). I also want to raise my kids in a Christian way and have them choose themselves later on like I did myself. For this reason I have chosen to still marry my SO in church as well since she IS (sorta) Christian :)
I disagree, you don't win her game by playing along. You win the game by putting this kind of attention seeking down with a good neg, "Probably not, I'm more attracted to 20 year old girls than dead 80 year olds" — Matt1 min ago
@Imus That's nice of you :) My SO's position is that he'd not feel legit to get married in a church he doesn't believe in. He thinks it's offensive, and I get why.
@ElizB Oh, you're lucky. When I was 16 I wanted to become a priest, but catholicism (the religion I got baptised from) does not allow women at this position.
@avazula thats what i was raised in and i chose later when i was in college to not go to Catholic church, i chose a Christian church that was a bit more accepting
Some people i knew freaked out because of that change
@ElizB in your recent question, you mention speaking with your deaf-blind friend via signing. Is that hand-signing? or how do you communicate with deaf-blind people? Please only answer if you are still okay with me being curious.
My parents have been supportive of my education for my entire life. I lucked out and the field of interest to me just so happens to be a very high paying field. I recently finished my formal education and got a really well paying job. I am really grateful for all that my parents did for me and I ...
@Cashbee i can answer your question better as soon as fingers hit the keyboard... it's basically called tactile sign, and it uses ASL but the blind person holds the hands of the signer and understands where they are
I'm about to hop off the bus in a min to head into work, so not long :)
Although I do agree that the OP may be doing some overthinking of their own, I disagree with this answer because if it was a game to his girlfriend she wouldn't have got upset. — Astralbee24 secs ago
@Cashbee American Sign language is the main sign language for deaf blind people here in the states, and the tactile "method" is more of a "how" to read another's sign language without seeing their hands, so they use their hands to analyze the signer's fingers and hand position to learn what they're saying.
y'know how some people that lose one sense gain more in the other senses? Deaf people like me may have better peripheral visibility, and maybe better sensitivity to vibrations- I know I do.
Blind people gain sight by touching and remembering the space they are in differently, same with sign language
My girlfriend has a habit of thinking of scenarios that will never happen and then asking me a question about them usual about our relationship and then getting upset if i dont answer correctly.
One such example is:
We were watching an episode of doctor who an she asked, If we were both
m...
