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4:42 AM
Q: How do I deal with my boyfriends parents who hate me?

Caroline WindingFor a backstory, my boyfriend just recently graduated and moved to college, because he already had a rocky relationship with his parents. He was on the edge of getting kicked out of his house several times because his parents are bipolar, so he eventually made the move to live on campus himself. ...

1 hour later…
6:03 AM
Q: I keep forgetting the ways other peopl like to handle things

Andreas ZieglerIn the past I often heard my mum, my wife, my brother or other relatives to complain how I do certain things (washing dishes, cleaning, etc.) and advising me how they prefer I would do it. For a (too) long time I didn't pay too much attention to it. But recently I my interest in non-violent commu...

6:38 AM
Morning everyone!
12 messages moved to Trash
@avazula Afternoon!
@AJ Already? :O
It's 10 minutes past 12.
I'm late in chat this morning
07h41 in here.
I had to defrost my car this morning brr
@avazula Whatever you do, you will always be late in chat for me. ;P (Unless you shift here) :P
@avazula Don't you have a garage or something where you can keep the car away from mother nature?
6:48 AM
@AJ I don't shift but I still do odd hours :p (7AM 6:30PM in average)
@AJ No ... and that's my biggest regret about my current house. I'd like to get my motorcycle licence but I can't until I have a garage to park it. I'm currently looking for a house to buy.
oh, you meant moving to India ...
1 hour later…
8:00 AM
@Pseudohuman o/
@CaldeiraG still not in here :p
Morning to you too :)
@avazula yes. ;p
8:23 AM
@avazula :)
good morning all! its -2 here and i am glad to be indoors
@AlexRobinson Yay :)
snow is looking more likely for december and i am excited
no snow around here like ever XD
Only on Serra da Estrela which is too far from here
we get snow like every 2.5 years or something like that
10:06 AM
I can't speak for specifics, but generally if I wanted to tell you something bad, I probably wouldn't waste a dinner on you. — Strawberry 2 mins ago
Reported with custom reason: "possible-aic" by Ælis
@chumpbot tp
Marked this comment as caught correctly (tp). Currently marked 2tps/0fps. beep boop My human overlords won't let me flag that, so you'll have to do it yourself.
10:19 AM
| is this an answer? | interpersonal.meta.stackexchange.com/a/3912/21067 (cc @Tink since you wanted to keep winter bash out of this)
@Ælis Meh, it's meta. I think the comments are clear enough, you're not looking for winterbash as an answer... but I wouldn't go as far as deleting it.
regardless, there has been no indication that winterbash will happen this year
Alright, thanks for the insight :)
They'll probably promote their pyramid scheme, as @Jont outlined. — towe 4 mins ago
#23474 towe (101 rep) | Q: Two people from small group of friends want to have a "meeting" with me. The circumstances are strange and give me a bad feeling (score: 21) | posted 23 hours ago by hectorpepper (211 rep) | edited 23 hours ago by hectorpepper (211 rep) | Toxicity 0
Reported with custom reason: "possible-aic" by Ælis
'What we Westerners hate the most ...' that's a wild generalisation, I'd be much more likely to upvote this reasonable answer if it were expressed as being particular to US work culture or whatever is appropriate. Certainly in my work culture in Scotland its probably a 50/50 split when using office messenger or skype to ping a greeting first to check if the other person is actually there and in a position to respond rather than going straight in with the question. — Spagirl 48 secs ago
#23489 Spagirl (12770 rep) | A: What is the etiquette around greetings in online communication in India? (score: 0) | posted 2 hours ago by Imus (5375 rep) | Toxicity 0.0 | tps/fps: 0/0
Matched regex(es) ["chatty"]
11:05 AM
All this yesterday talk about Christmas decoration made me want to decor my small studio. Too bad all my decoration are stored in my grandparents' house and then I won't be able to retrieve them before Christmas :(
Also, I wish it would snow in Paris. I love snow, I want to see snow!
Also, here is a Christmas kitty * - *
And here is a kitten in the snow:
11:19 AM
I'm basically doing some copy-pasting today (which is really boring). So, if anyone wants to chat, I'm really open to that (please, save me for all the boringness :'( :P )
im having lunch
And talking with someone about a weird, apparently Dutch, habit: Having a birthday calendar hanging in the toilet ;)
Well, as far as I know, people put all weird kind of stuff to hang in their toilets, so that might not be as weird as it seems ^^
But, in my family, it's usually more a map of the world who is on display (don't ask me why, I have no idea x) )
We also have posters representing the mountain. So you can look at nice things while doing.. what you have to do :p
Yeah, it's... a Dutch thing, it even has it's own 'stuffDutchPeopleLike' entry: stuffdutchpeoplelike.com/2010/11/19/the-birthday-calendar
You can kill some time there ;)
@Tinkeringbell Ahah, I like this article very much x)
@Ælis The whole site is a timesink. Even if you're Dutch ;)
11:27 AM
I should probably take a closer look at it tonight then (and not yet, since I'm still suppose to do some work :p )
I have an idea for a question that i'd like to put in sandbox but i'm worried its going to end up as a "phrasing" question... i need to think about how to keep it on topic
@AlexRobinson Well, if you can't find a way to do that, you can always put it in the Sandbox "as is" and we will help you make it more on topic :)
ah thank you! i'll probably do that during my lunch break
No need to thank me, that's what the Sandbox is for after all ^^
Brainlessly copy-pasting is really boring, I wish I was done with it already (but I will need to do that for at least one more day, this is really no fun :( )
Can you listen to music or something while doing this?
It usually helps me if I'm doing tasks that don't need much attention to have the music to focus on :)
11:43 AM
I was going to say "yes", but then I remember that I have no earphone with me at the moment >< (I almost never listen to music at work, not sure exactly why)
Well, this place (the Tuesday office) is a really really loud and noisy one, so I always bring noise-cancelling headphones and music here ;)
@Ælis That sucks :(
@Tinkeringbell My office can be very loud too, but I can't use a noise-canceller with my glasses on (at least, I haven't figure out a way to do that yet), it's too painful :(
Oh, yeah... you said that before :(
That sucks even more ;)
we're given senheiser headsets in order to be able to take calls... doesn't say they can't be used for spotify in the meantime ;)
Yep, that's a perfect use of company resources!
11:51 AM
@Tinkeringbell Well, thankfully I don't really like listening to music that much. So, it's not that big of an issue for me (and with my part time, the office noice is more bearable. So, all in all, things aren't so bad :) )
(Appart for this copy-pasting task ><)
i was once given a copy-pasting task that took me 20 hours in total and would've been difficult to automate due to the exact nature of the task.... that was fun
The "worst" part is, I am the one who assigned this task to me. If I really didn't want to do it I could still "this is a bad idea/this isn't working after all". So, I don't really have anyone to blame except myself ><
(but it's an important and valuable task. It just is sooooooo boring!)
12:18 PM
well i hope the rest of it doesn't take too long to complete ^^
1 hour later…
1:45 PM
@Tinkeringbell My Tuesday office has me sitting in a packed conference room
Oof, that's even worse than just music and headphones :)
Yeah, and I just found out that they want us to be here tomorrow too :(
We used to do 4 days a week here, but we went down to 1 day a week just for meetings because there's so little space and we always sit in a conference room (and they change our conference room/kick us out for random periods)
But apparently there is "client leadership" on site and they want us to be, idk visibly miserable?
@Rainbacon I've been working in a conference room for the last 6 months...
@avazula That sucks
How big is it?
@Rainbacon almost twice as big as my bedroom I'd say
1:56 PM
Well, that could be nice, depending on how big your bedroom is. Do you sit in there with your team?
@Rainbacon I do. It's just that I never had an actual desk since I arrived and I miss it a bit tbh
Same, you don't realize how much you like a monitor until you don't have it
this is so true
@avazula You mean that you switch places everyday?
@Ælis I don't, but all my stuff is on a table. I don't have storage or anything personal except my rubber duck
2:01 PM
@avazula It's sad to not have anything personal :/ I really do love the mess of my own desk (with a lots of toys on it ^^)
@avazula You actually have a rubber duck at your "desk"? That's awesome
@Rainbacon Better than that, it's a CR.SE one :D
@avazula That sounds wonderful. The rest of your space situation does not sound so wonderful
@avazula I might like pictures too much, but do you have some? *-*
@Ælis I don't :/ And I won't be able of taking one until my coworkers are gone haha. I'll try to think about taking one tomorrow morning ;)
2:06 PM
I asked for a regular desk the other day (because there's plenty of them, it's just that my boss thinks it's best that the three of us IT guys are in the same place) for that way, I could use my noise cancelling headphones (which do a pretty great job at isolating myself from the others ... but people can hear my music when I wear them so I wanted to get further from other people). That wasn't a great argument to use to convince them.
@avazula I honestly feel like you shouldn't need to argue about having their own desk... At least, in a place where there are free desk available
Side effect: I really don't get along with one of my two coworkers and I'm really struggling not to show it these days. This morning they asked me not to shake my leg in a rather inconsiderate way and it drove me crazy ... which is really little to get mad about
That sounds like a really great reason to go as far from them as possible
Side note: people shaking their legs near me are driving me crazy, but that's easily fixed by having them side not so close to me. If everyone had a reasonable person space for them, those problems wouldn't exist in the first place
@Ælis Conference tables are unstable, they shake alongside the legs :p that's probably what bothered them but heh... I really can't help myself otherwise I'd have a meltdown
I switched to stimming with my elastic bands instead. So far it works o/
2:15 PM
@avazula I used to have a coworker who would give me a death stare when I would shake my leg
@Rainbacon :(
@avazula I probably would want to kill you or the table if I was your coworker :p But I probably would also try to fix the ù%!:* table first ^^
Also you would think that if it's so important for all the IT folks to sit together, they'd give you desks near each other
^ that
@Rainbacon open offices ... what can I say?
2:19 PM
Disagree. Inviting someone to dinner is the classic move when you are worried the person might freak out and/or get violent, so you want the venue to be somewhere they will feel inhibited from making a scene. — T.E.D. 51 secs ago
#23479 T.E.D. (2231 rep) | A: Two people from small group of friends want to have a "meeting" with me. The circumstances are strange and give me a bad feeling (score: 30) | posted 17 hours ago by thanby (1075 rep) | edited 17 hours ago by thanby (1075 rep) | Toxicity 0.0 | tp
Matched regex(es) ["chatty"]
@chumpbot tp
Marked this comment as caught correctly (tp). Currently marked 1tps/0fps. beep boop My human overlords won't let me flag that, so you'll have to do it yourself.
2:33 PM
Q: Etiquette about crossing a door when someone also wants to cross from the opposite side?

ÆlisLet's take the following situation: I'm on the outside and want to go inside Someone is inside and want to go outside The door is open (one of us is holding it) There isn't enough room for both of use to cross at the same time Every time this situation happens to me, there is an awkward momen...

I just realize that, now that questions are worth 10 instead of 5, I don't know before clicking if it was my newest question that was upvoted or my newest answer >< (this is really terrible, I know! :p )
@mods (@avazual, @Tink, @EmC) This #metoo answer is causing issues. We might want to delete it sooner rather than later (since it's not backed up and causing conflict)
2:53 PM
Q: How to gently ask your neighbor not to use your bins for his waste?

N.R.In the past months, there were several occasions when I found foreign waste in my personal bins. I cannot say, that was my neighbor for sure as I never saw anyone. But the waste type and content made me realise since the very beginning that it must be him. There are no families with children livi...

@Ælis TIL I have another name o/
@avazula Oups xD
So, my closest coworkers are all coughing and currently at the office. I don't want to catch what they have ><
3:25 PM
@Ælis Have an answer!
3:37 PM
reading some of the answers on our latest HNQ is .. interesting .. because I have personal experience refuting "Generally speaking you don't invite someone to dinner if you want to have a hard conversation", but not enough to write an answer since I didn't act on my gut feelings beforehand :P
3:55 PM
i am really hecking annoyed at superuser
i ask a question, am given no hint as to why its a bad question, ask about how to improve it and was ignored until you stepped in. actually, thats not welcoming to new users and even if your suggestion would've improved the question - thats not an environment i wish to be a part of
shrug I came to SO to find answers and found myself answering questions instead... xD
i find it genuinely distressing to not be told why i'm being downvoted into seemingly oblivion and only see the results
@AlexRobinson you know, it's also possible that it was just someone passing by and who was having a bad day...
4:00 PM
@AlexRobinson whoa not even censoring your hecks? This must be serious O_O
I'm not surprised, you don't know how much bad-quality questions that appear on SU. SO is a similar situation.
i can imagine its lots of people in my situation - having a problem that they feel very out of depth on and looking for an answer
what i am shocked at is that the response seems to be to just downvote and close rather than offer suggestions to improve the question
i'd also like to point out i did make an attempt to ask how to improve my question and it was flat out ignored until i pointed it out
A moderator just answered to you
It takes time, you don't know who were DV'ing
Could be a 125 rep user or 10k user
its not at all comforting to know that it might be a less experienced user. that doesn't matter to me. i'm just kinda upset at how it was handled
we kinda do that here too, to be fair. Sometimes you don't want to hear from the downvoters.. you don't want to force someone to say "I downvoted because I think your question is bad and you should feel bad"
which isn't a nice attitude, of course, but if that's the reason it is better they keep it to themselves, you know?
so we take the stance "if they know how to make it better and want to say so, they will"
not to invalidate your feelings. I get it's frustrating, I just don't know how to make it better :/
4:09 PM
atleast here on IPS we always try to say "i dont think your question is a good fit because of X, perhaps you could edit it to clarify Y"
That's also because of our low traffic though. On a sight like SU where they get a veritable flood of questions every day, there's just not time for that much of a gentle touch everywhere.
there's actually an auto-flag, if a question is closed without any comments on it
@scohe001 ^^
but, if there is already a couple not-super-helpful comments, I can see how a question could get lost on a bigger site :/
@EmC many questions get lost on there
4:13 PM
that's a lot :o
oh yea
SO has almost 5.5 million unanswered questions
Dang, 650k visits a day. That's wild
Be in mind some of these question without upvotes/accepted questions actually get answers
IPS has... 4 unanswered. and 2 of those were asked within the last couple hours. lol
4:16 PM
but they're not hot enough to stay more than 5 minutes on the main screen
65% would not be a high enough answered rate to graduate from area51, maybe we should close superuser ;)
eventually the OP forgets to accept and the question is out in the wild
unanswered is defined as no upvoted answer. an answer thats upvoted counts as "answered" iirc
2 mins ago, by CaldeiraG
Be in mind some of these question without upvotes/accepted questions actually get answers
For example
A: I cannot run app on android emulator in Visual Studio 2019

CaldeiraGFrom: Troubleshooting Tips - Xamarin Microsoft Page This occurs when you don't start the emulator from within Visual Studio. When starting the emulator outside of Visual Studio, you need to pass the -partition-size 512 options, e.g. shell emulator -partition-size 512 -avd MonoDroid ...

better example :D
thats true, trouble is, its unlikely to be found and upvoted
4:20 PM
Better, I should change the title
So it's searchable by the errors
@AlexRobinson I'd have helped with that Excel problem if I knew how
thank you. A solution was posted but it appears that i have windows registrary errors and i don't have an admin password so i can't download any software to fix it lol
therefore atleast for me, the problem has no solution other than trial and error... which i am not gonna do
@CaldeiraG I feel obligated as a mod to suggest you should've just written your answer first, instead of suggesting one in the comments ;P
its often a good way to communicate with new users even if it's not best practice
i remember on worldbuilding SE i managed to get the same answer accepted on 4 different questions... i'd always flag the question for duplicate but it sometimes took its time
4:52 PM
@chump can I get a cute fall pig?
Heh. Perfect
omg @scohe is that Finley??!
Lol ye
4:55 PM
Q: Explain to group of friend that I will no show empathy to other friend

user3399Recently, a person in our group of friends, let's call her Rachel, was involved in a car accident. The problem is, she was drunk and driving a stolen car. To give a bit more details : they were two in the car, both of them drunk, and they ran in a car with 4 teenagers (their driver was not drun...

certainly an interesting question from a philosophical angle, but possibly a "phrasing" question?
@chumpbot Oh, is there more Finley??? Can I have a pig too?
Okay, seems like the answer is no ><
At least, give me a cat then @chump
Yeah, yeah, I see you laughting at me!
Lol I really really like that cat pic
5:04 PM
Nice cat pic ;p
Me: "Argh, why can I never focus at work??"
Also me: *posts a poem about a video game on Reddit at work*
that is an aic if ever i've seen one
well, i'm about to get off of work, so i will see all you wonderful people tomorrow!
5:24 PM
@AlexRobinson See you tomorrow! <3
6:13 PM
Oh, I have 10, 44 and 99 badges on IPS, that's some nice numbers here! (@Rainbacon)
Indeed, I'm at 2, 28, and 69
My numbers are less interesting
6:37 PM
Well, the last one still is :p
I suppose that's true
@chumpbot Nice reason
My pleasure :p
1 hour later…
7:42 PM
Also, weren't I suppose to be whitelisted? >< (@scohe001 maybe I did it wrong the other day?)
@Ælis You need to go make your newest question hotter so that it will hit HNQ once it's old enough (then I can get the HNQ rep)
@Rainbacon Sorry, can't do that :p (but you can always try to close the current one, maybe it will work :p)
@scohe001 You aren't in the closet :p
7 messages moved to Trash
14 messages moved to Trash
@scohe001 How is it that @chump didn't give a pig to me when I asked for one but it gave one to you?
7:57 PM
@Ælis I owe pigs to no one. Hmph.
@chumpbot Ah, I understand things better now. SCOHE001, put this poor chumpbot down and stop using it as a puppet!
@chumpbot Not the reaction I was expecting, but okay x)
Ahh "pup" is a dog word, so it caught "puppet" lol
@scohe001 That means it will also catch pupper, doggo, and woofer
But probably not floofer
8:05 PM
Huh, I'm not familiar with "floofer"
A floofer is a woofer that kind of looks like a cloud
Unless it's swimming, then it's a sub-woofer
Oh like a dogfish?
More like this
LOL dog memeology has progressed a long ways from when I last studied it
@Rainbacon like @JourneymanGeek then?
8:10 PM
And don't forget the almighty party puggo
"Always subwoof, never superwoof "
@scohe001 Yeah, this should get you up to speed
@Rainbacon xD
8:25 PM
I believe that @Tinkeringbell as keep some secrets from us :p (#PartyParrot)
(yes, I'm going through all the videos from that channel that Rain just linked :D )
8:36 PM
Also, they are talking about Finley here :p @scohe
"lil bacon seeds" :p
9:01 PM
Lol I think I've heard that actually
@Tink Seems like you need a hug:
user image
(sorry, couldn't find a red one)
That's okay. The hug is very appreciated :)
Hey that might look red if you're red-green colorblind...
@scohe001 I can't react to that, I think my brain just crashed x)
Have you tried turning it off and back on again?
9:21 PM
I will, but it takes approximately 9h to restart :p
Hmm sounds like a slow machine. Have you tried downloading more RAM?
Unfortunately, no one seems to sell some for this specific model :(
Oh, I just hit the IPS rep cap! o/
Also, could someone respond here? I'm going to bed (issue: the answer doesn't have back up)
1 hour later…
11:00 PM
@thanby while I would also find this a bit odd, I wouldn't consider it outrageous for someone to choose this way. In fact, a reasoning like “ok, this person is going to hate what I'll say, but I want to make it clear that I'm not being an angry attacker but just saying what needs to be said” could well motivate the choice to go to a restaurant. — leftaroundabout 2 mins ago
#23479 leftaroundabout (101 rep) | A: Two people from small group of friends want to have a "meeting" with me. The circumstances are strange and give me a bad feeling (score: 48) | posted 25 hours ago by thanby (1075 rep) | edited 1 hours ago by thanby (1075 rep) |
Matched regex(es) ["chatty"]
@EmC super user seems like a mess to me.. Now all questions are too old to migrate, rep farmers don't vote to close or link to similar questions, even tags are so poorly used. Then everyone just dumps their query there since it is a site for "computer hardware and software".
the site definition makes it eligible for questions of all tech related sites we have
Blue Planet 2 on IMDb, music by Hans Zimmer and Radiohead. made by BBC, available on Prime
11:30 PM
@EmC I know :p but my course of action is to look for duplicates first (usually on Google) and found that like 1st result or 2nd. I expect people to do their research before asking but because users don't do that, I told the OP to look at the link and see if anything on the Microsoft page would work. I feel kinda bad if I answer a question and then OP comes in and says it doesn't work and "already checked that"
But in case the link breaks, my answer has the answer :p
Q: What does the eyes emoji in GitHub reactions mean?

PyfischFor a while GitHub allows users to react with emojis to issues and comments. While I understand the meaning of most emojis like 👍 and 🎉, I am not sure what people are expressing with the 👀 (eyes) emoji.

question on SU when it's off-topic by two reasons: not a computer software (website)/meaning of an emoji :p
I also do "semi-answers" in comments, for example, I may know the answer but need to check sources for it :p
ASAP i change it to an actual answer

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