The Awkward Silence

1:20 AM

0

Q: How do I respond to someone saying "thanks for waiting" after a long wait I wasn't okay with?

Recently, I was in a line at the supermarket where the person ahead of me took nearly 10 minutes to resolve a payment issue with their order (usually, payment takes 30 seconds to a minute). When that was finally taken care of, the cashier started scanning my items and said "thanks for waiting." ...

Extroverted Main Man

5:27 AM

0

Q: Elegant and general way to reponse when others quarrel on the internet?

There are many forums on the Internet, and, not all of the people there are as kind as stack exchange guys, you know. When other want to quarrel with you, is there any elegant and general way to express refusion?

non-violent-communication

Marcus

6:02 AM

o/

Imus

\o

Magisch

6:50 AM

/o

Cashbee

o7

Tinkeringbell

Good morning ;)

Magisch

The resident parrott has landed :D

good morning

Tinkeringbell

Hahaha :) Yeah, I'm back on earth :P

A J

good afternoon

Mithrandir

7:04 AM

mornin'

avazula

7:21 AM

mornin' too

Mithrandir

*sigh* sirens are no fun

Tinkeringbell

@Mithrandir the mythical ones, or the incoming attack ones?

Mithrandir

the ones that mean "go run to the safe room"

Journeyman Geek

:(

Cashbee

how can you type so fast while running?

Tinkeringbell

7:30 AM

Well, I hope you're in that safe room then?

Mithrandir

Waited it out, ten minutes passed

Marcus

all the regulars attending - is this a meeting?

Cashbee

is it usual to just wait out sirens and see if they stop?

Journeyman Geek

@Marcus Awkward Silencers anonymous

Mithrandir

@Cashbee hear siren > stop playing piano > go to safe room > sit against wall away from window > wait ten minutes after the siren stops > resume normal activity

Cashbee

7:33 AM

@Mithrandir ah so you were there. ok then 😃

Mithrandir

eyeballs-requested | "try this" | How to ask my local baker if he is always selling freshly baked bread

(disputed flag)

Magisch

@Mithrandir Are these sirens in place to prevent people from getting hit with rockets?

Mithrandir

@Magisch or... drone debris

avazula

I think you're right there.
PS: I'm glad it's over

Journeyman Geek

0_0

@Mithrandir whose drones?

Mithrandir

7:35 AM

@JourneymanGeek Syrian or Iranian, dunno

Magisch

It's a little bit unreal to consider the situation where you'd have to regularly seek shelter from rockets being fired at your city

Journeyman Geek

ah ok :(

@Magisch cause politicians are a little like toddlers with hammers sometimes :(

The geopolitics of that region is as messed up as could be, and sometimes people seem intent on making it worse

Magisch

Aye

Mithrandir

the only things that would make it worse would be either an earthquake or actual war breakout

avazula

@Mith are those sirens frequent?

Journeyman Geek

7:37 AM

@Mithrandir people 'win' wars

Magisch

Gives sitting in this office where the worst that's ever happened was someone misjudging an oven causing a small fire a new perspective

Journeyman Geek

Low intensity conflict is.. in some ways worse

Mithrandir

@avazula they might be becoming more frequent

avazula

:(

Magisch

I watched a documentary about the history of modern asymmetrical conflict

avazula

7:43 AM

@Magisch What did you learn from it?

Journeyman Geek

@Magisch N one ever really wins those

especially if there's a proxy war of sorts

Magisch

@avazula It came back to bite the guy who developed the strategy, hard.

And then it came back to bite a lot of people hard since these sorts of conflicts are so decentralized and asynchronous that they're nigh on impossible to end or win in any way.

avazula

I'm baffled wars still exist in the XXIth century. It dismays me that such conflicts still exist despite our intelligence

Magisch

7:58 AM

@avazula I'm not baffled at all. In fact I expect the conflicts to increase substantially as climate change progresses

Cashbee

Are "Is that ethical?" questions on topic?? i thought not

Tinkeringbell

@Cashbee Nope.

Cashbee

3

Q: Friend asking for a job referral but doesn't have the skills

A friend who wants to get into software development asked me to refer him to my company. I had a look at his CV and he is unlikely to even get an interview ( lack of skills, lots of spelling mistakes that he won't correct ). Is it ethical for me to just not forward his CV and tell him he has been...

friends

Tinkeringbell

that'd be the same as asking is this right or wrong.

Magisch

Every human is primarily motivated by self preservation and proliferation of their own genes. Resources to do so are finite. Thus, everyone is inclined to want as much for themselves as possible.

This is closely linked with the "Billionaire's dilemma"

avazula

8:01 AM

@Cashbee I added a custom close reason

Magisch

You'd say, if you have a billion dollars, that you'd be set and could stop wanting more. But you can't. "What if I lose 90% of that?" is a constant thing. The idea that more would be better never stops. As long as resources are finite nothing short of "all of them" will ever be enough

Tinkeringbell

Every human? :P

Magisch

@Tinkeringbell Yah. To a variant extent

You are too

Cashbee

@Magisch so I can only stop fornicating if all the children in the world are my children?

Magisch

You're pretty motivated not to die I imagine

Tinkeringbell

8:09 AM

Well... maybe the self preservation part, certainly not the poliferation of my own genes ;)

Extroverted Main Man

1

Q: How to deal with a person that's not able to argue based on facts

it's a bit of a long story. TL;DR at the bottom I am in a martial arts club since ~10 years. My trainer is not a friend of japanese dojo style but he made the training more open and like a workshop, which was appealing to me. Over the course of the years we became friends and we did some project...

conflicts difficult-people narcissists

Magisch

@Cashbee You can only stop chasing wealth if you have all the wealth

Tinkeringbell

That's not really true though.

Cashbee

All your wealth are belong to us!

Magisch

@Tinkeringbell Maybe not on an individual level, but in aggregate it is

avazula

8:11 AM

@Magisch Is this weird if I say that I'm not?

Magisch

@avazula Pretty sure you are, actually. Most of what you do is in service to that

Even if you're not mentally, your body is. The very fact that you can feel pain at all serves that purpose

Cashbee

and where does suicide come into that equation?

Magisch

It's been theorized that suicide is a natural mechanism to weed defective genes from the gene pool and/or stop them from bogging the social group down. But I'm not too keen on that theory

Cashbee

i mean, clearly not everybody is motivated not to die. there is much middle ground too

avazula

@Magisch It may be remains of my depression (I survived a terror attack and saw a dozen people die around me) but I'm actually just going one day through another

Trigger warning: Are they people disturbed by death talks around? I wouldn't make anyone feel uncomfortable

Magisch

8:14 AM

@avazula If your hand gets stuck between door hinges, it still hurts right? You still have a reflex to pull your hand out and maybe run it under cold water

That's your body and unconscious mind screaming "keep me alive"

avazula

That's instinct indeed

Does not mean that's what one wants

Magisch

Even people who are suicidal need a massive amount of willpower to actually make an attempt, and even then their body and mind fight them every step of the way. There's a reason so many people have second thoughts on a suicide attempt and stop midway through

Every fiber of our body wants us to, at first, survive.

"want" is undefined in that context. Your unconscious mind and instincts are in fact part of your wants and needs, I feel.

avazula

i'm not sure it's the main reason why people think twice about taking their own life.

Magisch

Might not be, but it's a reason, I think at least

avazula

I actually didn't felt it myself, so maybe, yes :)

but i think one needs more to keep goingimo

Cashbee

8:24 AM

i think so too. that even if your mind is completely set on doing it, you'll have to overcome that huge hurdle of your own instinct

Magisch

I had a reaction to a medication once where I felt like what people with depression describe at depression. it was horrible and at that time I could understand why people sometimes chose suicide. It was very obviously messing with the chemical balance in my brain because feeling like that is really not normal and deeply scary

Extroverted Main Man

0

Q: How to make people understand that I am working in a part of my vast domain

I am a Telecommunications engineer who's working as a programmer these days. One of my dreams was to continue my master degree and become a control system engineer. I always read about the subject and learn the math and science behind this domain. People keep telling me: OH NO, you are not worki...

conversations awkward-situations

Tinkeringbell

Woohoo! The government just activated the National Heat Plan :D

Free ice cream XD

Cashbee

@Tinkeringbell srsly?

Tinkeringbell

@Cashbee Nope :P

Cashbee

8:36 AM

that would have been awesome

Tinkeringbell

Although, the client I'm currently working for was already giving out free ice cream last week ;)

I'm currently looking for what the Heat Plan exactly entails.

So far, it seems they just send out a message to drink enough, stay cool, watch the elderly, and survive

2

Magisch

34°C today here

Send help

Tinkeringbell

I hope they help :)

Mithrandir

...people seriously need to stop commenting on that question.

Tinkeringbell

What question?

Mithrandir

8:38 AM

16441

Tinkeringbell

@Mithrandir Oh yeah, that one.

Journeyman Geek

@Tinkeringbell "watch the elderly and survive"

as opposed to not watching the elderly and perishing by the hordes of unwatched zimmer framed pensioners?

Tinkeringbell

@JourneymanGeek Yeah :P

Journeyman Geek

@Tinkeringbell one more comma!

ONE MORE!

There's enough commas, even if you're walken, in the world.

Tinkeringbell

There's no comma's before or after 'en' in Dutch..

Cashbee

8:43 AM

@JourneymanGeek uhm, where would that comma be?

Tinkeringbell

@Cashbee before 'and'

Journeyman Geek

@Cashbee @Tinkeringbell fixed it ;)

Marcus

@Magisch could you elaborate on the asymmetric warfare a bit more?

Journeyman Geek

(also, the real point was making a joke about walken commas.)

Cashbee

@Tinkeringbell oh. IIRC both ways are correct. i think its an oxford comma or something like that

Journeyman Geek

8:45 AM

@Marcus I think we all mean asymetric warefare

unless its people lobbing mortars at each other 20 years apart

or my favourite war ever

Marcus

youre right, i corrected

Tinkeringbell

Well, I've now found some documentation that Dutch people aren't the only ones to have crazy heatwave plans. Loosely translated:

Due to the excess mortality in Europe during the heatwaves of 2003 and 2006, awareness for the dangers of hot weather has been increasing. France has 'Plan Canicule' and England has a Heat Health Watch Plan

Journeyman Geek

nytimes.com/2016/11/08/world/what-in-the-world/…

This is an asynchronous war.

Magisch

@Marcus If you oppose a country or force with a very overwhelming millitary might, what do you do?

Journeyman Geek

ALso BEST WAR EVER

Magisch

8:46 AM

You can't openly ifght them

Tinkeringbell

Guys!!! I just got my yearling badge too :D

Best Monday EVER!

Journeyman Geek

@Magisch let them in, let them get comfortable, and kill em all in their sleep?

Cashbee

@Tinkeringbell congratz :)

Magisch

@JourneymanGeek The actual idea was not oppose them openly but convince people to kill as many civillians as possible from the other side in hopes they'll leave you alone

Journeyman Geek

@Magisch ahh.

Ok, I know that a lot of folks may disagree with his politics but... the Freehold series is mostly about that

its an interesting read, if a but heavy on the libertarianism

Magisch

8:48 AM

The documentary I watched is called "HyperNormalisation"

It's from a british filmmaker from 2016

It also talks about some of the modern advertising trickery

avazula

@Tinkeringbell Well done!

Tinkeringbell

Thanks :)

avazula

9:04 AM

Haven't we said one should not make assumptions on medical (especially mental) conditions?

Tinkeringbell

15

Q: To diagnose or not to diagnose? That is the question

I have a lot of experience - several years professionally - with mental illness and drug addiction. Twice (that I can recall), I have made potential diagnoses in my answers regarding people the OP is having problems with. I was asked about the wisdom of doing this by a moderator, so I stopped, ...

discussion

avazula

@Tinkeringbell I remember this question. I was asking because I saw a question where OP assumes a acquaintance of them has narcissist personality disorder, and since I'm not very familiar of this disorder, I was wondering if it falls in this scope

Tinkeringbell

interpersonal.meta.stackexchange.com/q/1384/1599 might be an interesting read then...

avazula

This would have been useful on Friday when @Cashbee and I were discussing the utility of negative adjectives in OP's question :)

But it seems to me that it doesn't address the present case. I checked it up, NPD falls into the psychology scope (and not medicine), so I'll let it here.

Erh, anon actually mentioned narcissism in her question. What should we do here? Inform OP that this is irrelevant information?

Tinkeringbell

9:23 AM

I'd say that if the question only assumes npd, and doesn't describe the troublesome behavior that the OP is dealing with, it's good to leave a comment, asking them to actually describe what happened (so that we can get something like the second meta).

If the description of what's troublesome is already there, I'd leave it for now

avazula

Ok, so in that case we're all good :)

Tinkeringbell

It's valuable information that an OP thinks something may be wrong with the person they're dealing with, such thoughts do influence your behavior towards others in my experience

avazula

Okay. I was annoyed because it's common for a lot of people to call mental disorders to describe behaviors that are not (e.g. calling someone schizophrenic when they're simply volatile). I think it's offensive against people who are really in trouble.

Magisch

@avazula "Haha I'm so OCD today"

I hate that phrasing

avazula

@Magisch Exactly. Those kind of sentences

Extroverted Main Man

9:49 AM

0

Q: Friend keeps gifting exipred items. How to politely bring it up?

Background info: the couple of times I have been in China and tried to buy some food from shops, I have noticed that all the things on sale were already past their expiry date. When discussing this with a Chinese friend, I was told this is pretty normal and not to be worried about. My question: ...

awkward-situations gifts china

Tinkeringbell

10:27 AM

Living on the edge: I probably forgot my laptop charger last Thursday at work. I'm now working from home using a charger I borrowed from my brother... and my laptop says it's currently at 0% battery level, yet continues running just fine! :D

Tinkeringbell

10:50 AM

And I jinxed it.

Magisch

hah

Tinkeringbell

Well. That means a two hour train ride to pick up my charger at the lost and found ;)

SmokeDetector

[ SmokeDetector | MS ] Body starts with title and ends in url, pattern-matching website in body, potentially bad ns for domain in body, repeated url at end of long post: Julias Finest out with numerous by arinakyle44 on interpersonal.SE

Cashbee

@Tinkeringbell 😬 are the trains at least working ok again?

Tinkeringbell

@Cashbee Yes...

It's just that I managed to lose it at the office farthest away from me :(

Marcus

10:57 AM

i think ones phrasing should only be corrected to improve their skill of expression but not because it's offensive to other people

Magisch

@Tinkeringbell you could buy a comparable one at a hardware store if one's closer to your home

Tinkeringbell

@Magisch not going to spend money on company stuff

2

Marcus

@Tinkeringbell but do you have to spend on the train ticket?

Tinkeringbell

No, the company pays for that ;) they got me a monthly subscription

Magisch

@Tinkeringbell eh, it's like 10 bucks, no?

you presumably make more then that in an hour

Tinkeringbell

11:00 AM

@Magisch it's probably going to be more. My brothers one already was the generic cheep charger and apparently it wasn't good enough

Cashbee

yea it's going to cost more than that

Tinkeringbell

I'm just going to pick it up, work on the train ride home, and work a few hours tonight

Cashbee

also they might not have the specific one

Tinkeringbell

Or make the rest up on Wednesday when I'm working from home as well

Cashbee

I'm unsure about this question: https://interpersonal.stackexchange.com/q/16846/8077
it is labelled as etiquette but the etiquette would be to just say "oh, it's no problem" - which is what OP specifically does *not* want to say.

and op does not specify a goal, so removing the etiquette tag is not working either

Imus

11:12 AM

The current top answer feels weird to me ... answering "thank you for waiting" with "thank you" -.-

avazula

@Imus It's because the answers assumes that "thx for waiting" actually means "sorry you had to wait". Replying "thank you" states that you understood the insinuated apology. May be either nice or rude IMO.

it's sth constantly repeated to people who sickly need to apologize for trifling matters: saying "I'm sorry" could be bad perceived in the long term. instead one should prefer to say "hey, thanks for understanding"

Journeyman Geek

@avazula well, I often do that as a way to defuse arguements that are silly ;p

avazula

@JourneymanGeek That's an excellent reason too :p

Imus

11:29 AM

@JourneymanGeek I usually am the cause of arguments that are silly :p Although I do try to make sure everyone understands THAT they're intended to be silly in the first place so it causes laughs instead of frustration :)

Journeyman Geek

@Imus the L2s at work can be a bit prickly

Imus

L2s?

Journeyman Geek

oh, support

Magisch

@JourneymanGeek I resemble that remark, although I'm not a L2 service tech

Journeyman Geek

We see things that look broken, we tell them

they get annoyed cause it isn't actually broken and we apparently should magically know that it wasn't

Magisch

11:32 AM

The flipside of this is the service techs tell you something's broken and it's obviously user error

Journeyman Geek

oh

they will never see that side

Sid

Ugh. Today is not a good day

Hopefully, the week doesn't get worse from here

Journeyman Geek

:(

Imus

I woke up this morning at 5:20 after a bad dream on a project I'm working on. This project I have to expand on my teamlead's code on something that should've preferably worked last week due to vacation constraints (both on our side as on tester side). But my teamlead himself is still a week more in vacation :)

I doubt your day started off worse then mine :p (although I'm not gonne bet on it)

Magisch

Massive heatwave from tomorrow onwards here

Imus

11:40 AM

(Quick note: I usually get up at around 6:30, I could've really used that extra hour of sleep)

Magisch

expected peak temperatures exceeding 35°C

Imus

@Magisch that sucks ... you got AC at work/home?

Sid

@Imus Okay. Not that worse maybe

Magisch

@Imus got ac at work, not at home

Imus

As far as I can tell in Belgium expected temperature is roughly 30°. No AC at home/work either

Journeyman Geek

11:41 AM

ah ow

Imus

currently at the office it's 27.4°C

Sid

It's flood situation here.

Cashbee

@Imus you mean the land of tomorrow?

Sid

We have been getting heavy downpour for the last 48 hours

Imus

@Cashbee I don't know that reference :s

Extroverted Main Man

11:43 AM

0

Q: How can I make my parents (and in-law parents) accept that I don't want to have kids?

First I would like to give a bit of context: My companion and I are 25 years old, we will probably get married in a few years I luckily have a confortable situation, have been working for 2 years My companion still has to study for 4 years (but she'll be working and will have a revenue) I get o...

family argument

Cashbee

@Imus tomorrowland... one of the biggest electro festivals

it's in belgium. 2 of my colleagues go there next weekend. I think it was last weekend already too

Sid

@ExtrovertedMainMan I really want to answer, "Don't try. You will never succeed ".

Imus

@Cashbee google says 20 till 29th juli. It's not that far from here :)

Cashbee

@Imus yup thats the one

Imus

Just found out that temperature here on thursday and friday is also expected up to 34° -.-

Cashbee

11:59 AM

@Imus I will relay that info to my colleagues ;)

Imus

@Cashbee Probably a good idea :) You may also want to mention that the usual normal belgian beers are around 5% alcohol. Not sure what you guys are used to ... especially with such hot weather dehydration shouldn't be taken lightly

Magisch

I like to refer to 35C as too hot to function

Rory Alsop

It's 29° here right now. I am a useless mess

Wife, friends and daughters are shopping. I'm hiding under a tree

Tinkeringbell

I'm starting to think I didn't mess up that badly by losing my charger. The train has a nice ac:)

Magisch

@Tinkeringbell plus it's good training for overcoming social anxiety

Cashbee

12:09 PM

@Imus thx for the warning but that seems normal to me. It's also not their beer consumption i am worried about :)

Magisch

i'm terrible I know

Tinkeringbell

@Magisch hahaha. I don't mind that kind of training I guess ;)

Cashbee

@Imus i had a 15% triple fermented grand cru beer this weekend. So tasteful

can I have some eyes on that answer pls? https://interpersonal.stackexchange.com/a/16778/8077
they followed my advice and tried to make it into a frmae challenge. But I don't think it's gotten any better. opinions?

FreezePhoenix

tosses an eye at the question

avazula

@Cashbee I agree

I think this answer severely lacks of formatting and backup, but it got lots of rep, which makes anyone question it dubious

Rory Alsop

12:24 PM

@Cashbee I agree, however the OP accepted it so it is the one that helped them the most. So I would leave it alone

Imus

Following the rules you're right. Then again, I also considered the answer itself a great one before you requested it be formatted as a frame challenge (also hence all the upvotes and checkmark). In this case it's OP feeling bad about not telling his truth about the situation. But by just having a different mindset about it, namely seeing it as a game rather than a discussion, he can feel good about just playing along instead of feeling bad for lying.

avazula

The fact that they consider it as a game does not make it less of a lie

Cashbee

thanks. that is exactly why i asked here. I see your points and will leave it alone, reluctantly

avazula

Cashbee and avazula hit the road with a slight twinge

Nah just kidding, you guys are too nice to leave

Magisch

@avazula I guess you could say that the bee ... cashed out puts on sunglasses

avazula

12:30 PM

YEEEEEEEEAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAH

The Who playing

Cashbee

memeing intensifies

I see the point of frame-challenging but the answer is good enough for me to be left alone

avazula

@Imus Ha thanks, I was waiting for this one :D

ElizB

o/

Cashbee

12:34 PM

hello @ElizB o/

ElizB

@Cashbee hello :)

avazula

@Marcus Well, to me it does not explain how this suggestion could help their relationship. But I hated that answer so I may not be partial, which is why I didn't insist once the edit done

@ElizB o/

ElizB

Hello @avazula :)

Still waking up/on autopilot :P

Marcus

@avazula why do you hate the answer?

avazula

@Marcus (My opinion only, of course) 2 reasons. 1: It's a short-term solution. It may help OP disarm his GF answers but it won't solve the pb they're facing, i.e. her wanting him to reassure her about his love for her. 2: The lying.

I don't think of many situations where lying to your SO is worth it.

Marcus

12:40 PM

In this case it could be considered a white lie.

avazula

Well, I'm not a fan of those. But again, my opinion.

I just think this answer avoids the real problem they're facing

ElizB

Just realized my access id is left at home. Blargh.

Cashbee

I would have preferred an answer actually explaining to her that I don't like such questions too. I think it can be done and I would do it too. I don't want to play those kind of games

@ElizB oh nooo

avazula

@ElizB :'(

@Cashbee Don't you think mine did that?

Marcus

We could flip the situation around by asking SO If they really loved us why do they put us in awkward situations with these hypothetical questions

Magisch

12:45 PM

relationship drama is unfun

Marcus

long term solution, no?

FreezePhoenix

SO don't care

Cashbee

@avazula ... to be accepted. :)

ElizB

yeah, i just told my boss to help me out. I have to get a visitor pass for the day. Oh well

Magisch

@FreezePhoenix you don't know that. People express love in different ways

avazula

12:46 PM

In the end it may be a question of style. What you're currently offering @Marcus, and what top answers does, is likely to lead to an argument, don't you think? We can at least say that it's pretty much more straightforward than what I, or others, could have offered.

@ElizB Pfew, problem solved!

FreezePhoenix

Oops outburst

ElizB

@avazula yeah, it's just extra hassle to get the visitor pass

Magisch

at my old job they'd not give you a visitors pass at all

you'd have to get home and get the pass.

ElizB

@Magisch yikes, okay I'm grateful :)

avazula

@Marcus Let's say that it's not suited for conflict-aversion people :)

Marcus

12:49 PM

Well if it does lead to an argument, people might at least make up their minds

avazula

@Marcus Which you could also do with a NVC solution. It's the main purpose of NVC, minus arguing.

@ElizB I'm working on confidential projects in one of my companies' safe zones, so a visitor pass is not enough. It's pretty complicated when I forget mine :')

Marcus

I disagree that the top answer likely leads to an argument.

You are assuming it being impossible of the So to actually play a game

avazula

@Marcus Nope. But I assume that if she is, it's for something deeper, and this is where I'm likely ot be wrong.

Marcus

Also people lie to each other, even in relationships, on a regular basis.

So why crucify the OP if he does.

Lies aren't always bad.

avazula

I don't. You asked me why I didn't like the answer. I'm telling you why I don't, and lying is something I loathe, white or not. That's all :)

Marcus

12:56 PM

Would avoiding the answer be ok?

avazula

@Marcus What do you mean?

Marcus

SO: *some scenario with question attached that op is uncomfortable with*
OP: "I'd rather discuss something else. Whats up for breakfast"

avazula

@Marcus I think it's a good short-term solution. It'll work at the moment but might quickly get on SO's nerves

Imus

@avazula based on your answer: Let's assume that the GF is strongly a "Words of affirmation" kind of person. And that the questions like in OP's example are actually her fishing for some affirmation that OP loves her. Avoiding that question or making a big fuzz about wanting to listen to her but completely ignoring her (not so) hidden pointer wouldn't really end well (In my opinion)

ElizB

@avazula Ahh, gotcha. I'm sure that people where I work have higher clearance than I do so it would be a complicated issue if they forgot theirs... I'm just the lowly unpaid intern

avazula

1:07 PM

@Imus The NVC answer I offered does not suggest to turn down the question but explain that OP is not at ease with it. It's a call for finding together a way that suits both of them for expressing their love. The main risk IMO is that if SO is actually really playing a game, she might think OP infantilizes her by disarming her questions.

@ElizB Interns are the reason why companies produce great work at low cost :)

ElizB

@avazula yeah, true. This is not a private company, this is the department of health for New york state

Magisch

you just reminded me of the new apprentice that starts next week

curses

Marcus

@avazula personally i find your answer to the question better. But we werent discussing quality of answer but whether or not they are valid. And both the frame challenge answer and yours are valid.

avazula

@Marcus Were we? I thought we were discussing answers' appreciation, not acceptability. My bad then. :)

Tinkeringbell

Aaagh. Now I forgot my wallet. Now I can't get ice cream on the way back :(

avazula

1:14 PM

@Tinkeringbell Doesn't seem like a good day :(

Magisch

@Tinkeringbell We didn't start the fire

It was always burning since the world's been turning

Tinkeringbell

Nah ... Well at least I got my charger back

ElizB

I had a fun weekend but today's hitting me... so tired. That's probably why i'm forgetting stuff and just going on autopilot

Magisch

Yeah same for some reason all the tiredness of the weekend is hitting me today during work hours

Tinkeringbell

I am not tired yet... I did sleep well this weekend and next week is vacation :P

Magisch

1:20 PM

... my next vacation day will be in late october

avazula

Late september here. Hold on @Magisch :3

Magisch

at least by then the blistering heat will have subsided

Tinkeringbell

I've been outside for 15 minutes in the sun now... Still no blisters. :P

ElizB

I kinda have a weekend planned but not sure what else. I have only one week for an actual vacation...

then classes start again plus my next internship.

Tea should help get my brain in gear and actually work on this paper i'm supposed to do...

avazula

@ElizB Good luck on your paper. That's a tough exercise.

ElizB

1:32 PM

@avazula Thanks, it's a research paper thing that I have to do to tell my advisor and my boss about the internship experience and what I discovered and what I did, and how to carry on the work

@avazula Personally, I don't write papers well. I've been trying to really get serious and get it done by the end of the month, so I can submit something to my advisor soon

Imus

@ElizB It helps me to first type out all the points I want to mention without thinking on how to word it in the paper. And afterwards ~~let my girlfriend write it out correctly~~ find a way to turn it into an actual proper document.

FreezePhoenix

@TheTinyMan Hello!

ElizB

@Imus That does help me.... and my husband is an amazing writer too... so he helps me correct my grammar and make it flow

My mom is brutal with a paper too.... I'm almost scared to give a draft to her haha

TheTinyMan

@FreezePhoenix Heya! How's things? :-)

Imus

@ElizB Give it to your hubby first then :p should take most of the fear away since you can just tease your hubby if he left a mistake in ;)

FreezePhoenix

1:40 PM

Going well! Just realized Kappa&Yokai and Friends was an SO room :(

Imus

@FreezePhoenix how bad is it that I have no idea who or what that is?

FreezePhoenix

It's a room

ElizB

@Imus hahaha yeah I probably will do that. My mom and my hubby get on very well so he will definitely get teased haha

Cashbee

I only know Kappa, as an emote of twitch.tv but i guess its not what he meant here

Imus

same as Cashbee :)

FreezePhoenix

1:42 PM

chat.stackexchange.com/transcript/72535

Imus

@FreezePhoenix well yeah, we get that it's a room. But which characters is that name of the room from?

FreezePhoenix

Hm. No clue

Imus

-.-

avazula

Ok guys I'm gonna have to go

Imus

*waves*, bye avazula

FreezePhoenix

1:46 PM

Bye!

ElizB

see ya :) o/

avazula

For the IT public in the crowd, here's sth to laugh about: I was wanting to delete the bin/ folder from some software, and I forgot it was a symbolic link pointing to /usr/bin, so I actually... deleted /usr/bin. I'm gonna have to reinstall. Please laugh at me, I deserve it haha. CYL :)

ElizB

oh man haha

see ya later

FreezePhoenix

I... once deleted all versions of python.

avazula

@FreezePhoenix Oh shoot, that's unfortunate too haha

I hope reinstalling without formatting will lead to keeping my data haha

@FreezePhoenix how did you manage to save your system?

FreezePhoenix

1:52 PM

I didn't :P