Interesting..that was pretty much what they told me in the UK too when we were thinking of moving there, but it seems to open up even more questions. In the UK, American citizens have 6 months visa-free, and I would almost certainly be leaving every six months or so (even though I didn't seem to have to anymore)..what's more, no one was permitted to discriminate against me with regards to work and rental contracts (my wife has achieved permanent status in London) as long as I could prove my relationship to my spouse, so why would even bother getting the permit?

I think it has different implications in Germany, where I'm required to declare my presence within 90 days of arriving, but who's to say I don't take a trip to Paris every 89 days? I will get the permit, because I'm sure it will save me a lot of trouble, but it just seems so fluid, and that scares me a bit, because I feel like I'm missing something.

@Christian "bother getting the permit": to avoid the need to carry marriage certificate and proof of spouse's EEA citizenship. Also, the directive allows countries to require a residence card of non-EEA family after no fewer than 90 days. Germany does, Britain doesn't. Declare your presence within 90 days of arriving: they can fine you for failing to do that; they can't deport you or deny entry. Taking a trip to Paris every 89 days: there's probably a provision that causes short trips not to count, since you're residing with your wife,but strictly speaking it might work.

What you're missing: the permit is not a permit! It's a card. The only negative consequence of failing to get it, under the directive, can be a fine that is proportional to the fine that German nationals receive for not having a similar document (if indeed they have such a requirement). Also, you can be required to register with your municipality only because German citizens are also required to do that. I think the phrase is something like "proportionate and not-discriminatory." They cannot deny entry for your failing to have a card.

Yes, thanks for correcting me. I need to get "residence card" stuck in my head, and forget "residence permit" forever. Thanks for all the info and putting my mind at ease.

I think the reason I'm a bit frightened is because when we entered Germany, my wife and I were briefly questioned about our relationship and what we were doing in Germany. I was subsequently given a somewhat sinister warning from the customs agent that I needed to visit the foreigners bureau (or something like that) within 90 days. If I'm passed my 90 days, and I still don't have proof (residence card) when I re-enter, is there going to be some issue? The scary bit is the EU law actually reads "3 months" not "90 days", which coincides to my available time in the Schengen Area as an American.

Ugh, I'm just reading too far into it. I'm sure it will be fine. Thanks for your time!

@Christian well they can fine you, so you're right to be a little worried. I think to be reasonable, they should take into account that you were unable to get an earlier appointment. If you have evidence that you went to the office within 90 days and made your appointment, that should suffice. The 3-month or 90-day period is the same for you and for tourists because that's effectively the maximum length of a reasonable vacation. EU citizens and their families can't be required to register sooner than 90 days because they might be on vacation, and that would be an unreasonable requirement.

The appointment is to register the address, at which time I'll be at around day 65. But then I have to wait for some documentation that shows my address is registered before I can go apply for a residence card. If the same type of waiting period applies, it could be well into January before I can even apply. Either way, I may have to wait anywhere from 1 to 6 months between applying for the card to actually getting it. I don't think I can be fined while the application is processing, but how can I prove that?

@Christian I don't really know. You should ask on Expatriates; someone there will have gone through the process and can explain whether there's a way to show that you're trying your best to be compliant.

"In the UK, American citizens have 6 months visa-free" -- the 6-months visa-free is for visitors and it is up to the traveller to demonstrate they are a legitimate visitor. If they realise you are residing in the UK then you will need to demonstrate your right to do so.

@PeterGreen that is correct. The point is tangential to the question at hand, which is why I didn't mention it earlier. For the family member eligible under directive 2004/38/EC , the basic requirements will be the same as they are in Germany.

@PeterGreen maybe in legal language, but in practice it doesn't seem to be the case. When you're the spouse of an eea national, I was told by multiple authorities to come as a "tourist" and then after 6 months, switch to a residence card. While technically I could apply for an EEA family permit before coming, I would have to demonstrate that my wife was exercising treaty rights, while I waited off in another country. The process is similar in Germany, except there is no equivalent to an EEA family permit. EEA family members are entitled to a (free) visa, but it's not necessary for a US citizen

Both in the UK and in Germany, even after demonstrating my relationship to my wife, I was still stamped with the same tourist entry stamps as I had been before we were married (She lived in London before we moved to Berlin together).

@Christian The Schengen stamp is not a tourist stamp; it's an entry stamp. It doesn't imply any particular status. It only indicates that you crossed the border in a particular direction on a particular date. The requirement to demonstrate that your wife is exercising treaty rights for an EEA FP is only applicable if she's been in the UK more than 90 days, though earlier the UK was not implementing the directive correctly and required that of everyone.

I'm aware of the status of the Schengen stamp, and I don't know how much earlier, "earlier" is, but this was only last summer, and the UK stamp says six months and specifically forbids employment. I was assured, though, I could apply for a national insurance number and work anyway, if an employer would accept my credentials as an EEA family member. My wife had lived in London for ten years - obviously more than the 90 days.

The EEA family permit (in effective, maybe not from a strictly legal perspective), seemed to only apply to those who would otherwise need a visa - the equivalent of Germany's (free) visa for EEA family members.

@Christian that's true. Unlike Schengen, at least in the general case, the UK allows those who don't need visas to get one anyway. So non-visa nationals can, and in some cases may want to, apply for one, especially since the UK tends to be stricter at the border. Did you get the UK visitor stamp despite showing proof that you fell under directive 2004/38/EC? I've been wondering how they stamp in such cases.