The Heap™ – Consultancy ©®

8:08 AM

Morning all

Tom V

Morning

Morning

McNets

Morning

1 hour later…

ConcernedOfTunbridgeWells

9:13 AM

Morning

Philᵀᴹ

Morning, Data Demons

9:56 AM

Morning all

2 hours later…

Paul White

12:00 PM

Morning

@McNets yes

12:46 PM

@PaulWhite but it that his final form?

1 hour later…

2:08 PM

He might be a scalar UDF next.

fn_ErikDarling

@jadarnel27 or his evil twin brother, destined to propagate bad practices, tbl_Erik

Probably keeps telling people to shrink their data files to speed their queries up

2:38 PM

Hey, smaller file = less data to read.

Good lord the Oracle client for windows seems insanely archaic.

@jadarnel27 That's true. I better drop all the indexes too :P

@George.Palacios Delete all of the data while you're at it.

No sense in half-assing things.

2:55 PM

@jadarnel27 now my queries will run really fast!

3:33 PM

@George.Palacios it's like magic.

3:50 PM

Even with zillions of joins

@George.Palacios you guys are so pessimistic. i predict @ErikDarling with (memory_optimized=on) is next

@AndriyM Hmm I wonder if there's a coding challenge in that

@AndriyM Write the slowest query

@PeterVandivier Haha you missed out on that one. I'm so pessimistic, but something something Erik_SnapshotIsolation

damn! i'm such a fool!

might as well change my name to @Peter (nolock)

@PeterVandivier Haha that's great

Then when people ask why that's your name, "It's because I'm pessimistic. It's because I'm pessimistic". Damn nolock reading those rows twice

@George.Palacios I wonder if this kind of challenge is actually realistic. I mean, it's like whose car is slowest but that one can be implemented. I'm curious if it's possible to implement "whose query is slowest".

3:56 PM

@AndriyM I'm gonna work on this. Hold that thought

@AndriyM There would need to be certain rules like only a single statement, max number of references to the same table, no use of system tables etc

@AndriyM Might just end up with too many rules

Maybe if you could make the query very specific

Specific table(s), specific output

yeah exactly

Basically, what's the stupidest way to write this and really confuse the optimiser

Whilst still getting the same results

Hey speaking of, are coding challenges like that accepted on the main DBA.SE site? (Aimed at anyone who knows)

Q: Are SQL Challenges On Topic?

There was a meta question along those lines, let me find it...

Should SQL challenges (performance-related or otherwise) be considered on topic for this site? By "SQL challenge" I mean attempting to solve a problem using SQL that may not have any immediate, real world application. In some cases it could be obvious that SQL is the wrong choice of language for ...

The majority of voters seem to be in favour

The sticking point is that it probably needs to have some long-term value

Thanks though that helps

Philᵀᴹ

4:12 PM

@Zane The Instant Client is better, but still shyte

@Philᵀᴹ I had some kind of issue and had to go through the "deinstaller" which was surprising to say the least.

@Zane I feel for you - although I am a bit of a masochist. I've been using nothing but Sqlplus command line for the past few months

Philᵀᴹ

4:41 PM

@George.Palacios give SQLcl a try: oracle.com/database/technologies/appdev/sqlcl.html

Q: SQL - Sum amounts daily from non-daily data

5:41 PM

At first I thought this question was so simple. However the deeper the comments went the less and less understanding I've gained.

I have a Account Balance History table containing ACCT_ID, EFFDATE, and AMT. ACCT_ID and EFFDATE are PK. A new AMT is only recorded when it changes, which doesn't happen every day. What I want to do is create a query that will give me daily totals for each of the last 5 days where EFFDATE is less

sql-server

6:01 PM

I left my headphones at home today. It's a rookie mistake and I am dissapoint.

2 hours later…