English Language & Usage: Multi-Layered Discourse Room - 2015-07-29 (page 1 of 2)

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1:29 AM

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Q: what your english language?

at the beginning of the passege, we learn that the rio grande is one of the most important rivers in america . can you think of another important landform the eixsts where you live?what makes it so important?

1:43 AM

Great question. Thanks for asking. I live by the Rio Grande — or "Big River" — which is one of the most important rivers in America. It is an important landform insofar as it eixsts at the beginning of the passege. How about yourself? — Jake Regier 2 mins ago

2:16 AM

@MattE.Эллен Very true! In a completely free society, we would see phones that are better suited to users than we do now.

You want to wear a suit made out of a phone?

Why not?

More is better.

Don’t you worry people might think your screen were too big?

2:40 AM

Why should they worry?

A screen cannot be too big.

You need to go sit in the front row of the cinema again.

Just make the image smaller, then.

6 hours later…

8:52 AM

@tchrist must be sick. He edited a question but left hyphens where en dashes belong. I am worried.

1 hour later…

9:58 AM

@RegDwigнt Insomnia. It’s not 4am.

Hong Kong Magazine: Last Week in Reality

> A female tourist from New Zealand visits Lan Kwai Fong, where she meets a Russian woman. They strike up a rapport, and after many drinks, the New Zealander finds herself lying on Hennessey Road at 3am. After a passerby helps her back to her hotel, she experiences a pain in her anus. Suspecting that she had been raped, she goes to the hospital. After an examination, a doctor informs her that she is in fact suffering from hemorrhoids.

Wat

This reads like a bad joke.

user image

Aye. Everyone adding juicy details as they go along. Must be a bad joke.

> At 11pm, more than 10 men break into a newly opened hotpot restaurant in Causeway Bay. Within two minutes, the men smash a fish tank, three television sets, two wine cabinets, refrigerators and tables with axes, Japanese swords and hammers. Before leaving, the mob pours two bottles of cough syrup in the tanks in an attempt to poison the fish. The police are now investigating the case.

What the hell.

Poison fish?

Japanese swords?

> When picking her three-and-a-half year old daughter up from school, a mother vomits and passes out. The child uses her mother’s iPhone to call her father before seeking help from teachers and janitors. She tells her father to stay calm and informs her him that she is going to take care of mom. The girl helps her mother drink water and mops her brow. The father shares the tale on Facebook and the post receives more than 10,000 “likes” in a few days.

What is this shit.

I now feel like a filthy idiot for reading this shit.

Blargh.

You shouldn’t go to supermarkets that have those at the checkout counters.

I don't think I ever so much as noticed any magazine in any market, super or not. I don't know why those aisles even exist. Waste of dead tree.

10:49 AM

@RegDwigнt Yeah. Thanks for sharing.

@tchrist So . . . don't go to supermarkets?

11:33 AM

@Cerberus: A friend tells me that the German dative/accusative prepositions (an, auf, hinter, neben, in, über, unter, vor, zwischen) are the last vestige of locative case in German. Thoughts?

11:48 AM

@Mitch You mean they don't?

Nur hier und heute! Robusto als Alleinunterhalter!

Not anymore.

Du bist hier auch allein.

You are too kind. I am not an entertainer, really.

Russel Crowe voice or ARE YOU ENTERTAINED? DO I ENTERTAIN YOU?

Why would you entertain that notion?

United Notions forces me to.

11:54 AM

Pfft. All they do is pass resolutions. Even a strongly worded one has no teeth.

On the plus side, they do resolve very quickly. Especially in Coca Cola.

I'm not sure what you're talking about. Did you mean Coca-Cola?

How am I supposed to know what I meant?

Ask on ELU.

"I just talked to a friend who said hello world. What does he mean when he says hello world?"

"I couldn't just ask him because I am retarded. Yes, retarded. I am so retarded I don't even know a PC euphemism for retarded"

It's probably the same as the Mac euphemism.

I am not seeing a ⌘ anywhere on mine.

12:01 PM

That's ret⌘rded.

BTW, hello is an example of "aspirated Y" in American mid-Atlantic dialect. The person is really calling you yellow but the Y has been aspirated oddly to H. Be careful, he probably has a gun.

Heah, thank hou, very huseful advice.

Be careful, I might have a gun.

Disclaimer: I don't have a gun, but you can't know that.

So be careful anyway.

Janie's got your gun.

What, again?

Yay, I just cracked 19k on SO. balloons, festoons, Walloons

Will I get to 20k this century? Tune in on 31 Dec 2099.

Hm, I'm at 13k. I don't even remember getting to 8.

I think I quit at 6?

12:12 PM

I quit around 10.

I have reached 926k people, apparently.

Pfft, 2 million for me.

I'd like to know how many of them I slapped in the face over the Internet.

I don't even remember when I was at 926k.

I hope it's over 9000.

@Robusto yeah that'd be because the metric ain't even that old. They introduced it when you were at 1.9999 million already.

12:14 PM

Just never you mind about that.

It could also be because I don't remember unimportant shit these days.

Woo-hoo, guess who's at 11 million people reached on ELU. Me, that's who.

But unimportant shit is the shittiest shit! What point is there in remembering non-shittiest shit?

@Robusto and yet exactly none of them got the message what this site is about.

inorite

10.9 million of them are in the SC.

Which is why I was so interested in the number of slaps.

Seems far more important to me than the number of candies you handed out.

Bettah watch out, Josh61 is gunning for you.

Nah. Janie's still in full control of the situation.

12:17 PM

Janie?

The one who got his gun.

And yours.

Or did you mean "Ja, nie!"

Kinda like ouija only different.

I meant "hit le R, Jack, and never come back, no more".

hear the one with the mustache say geez i can't find my nies

Niemals vorget!

12:23 PM

Niemals vor git!

git add .

Newer vorveit!

Donner ist nur ein Himmelfahrt.

user image

Réaumur!

12:40 PM

No deposit, no return.

12:51 PM

Is it possible to ask for proof reading in this room?

It's possible to ask. You might not get any takers, though.

@Robusto Hmm that doesn't really make sense to me. The locative is an old case that merged into other cases and/or disappeared, probably in pre-historic times for Proto-Germanic. Prepositions are quite different from cases, they are not the same morphemes. For starters, they come before the word, while case endings come at the end.

In what context did he say that?

@Cerberus I dunno, the conversation drifted that way when we were talking about language in general.

Something about older languages being more structured, and things like cases get reduced over time, that sort of thing.

@Robusto It is true that cases got reduced, and that prepositions to a significant extent took over their function.

Rainer Verteidiger

Hi!

1:04 PM

Perhaps that is what he meant.

Hullo @Rainer

@RainerVerteidiger Hi!

Rainer Verteidiger

Robusto: thunder is just an Ascension Day? :-P

Before we start, @Rainer, you must address us all as Herr Doktor, capisce?

Rainer Verteidiger

lol

I could use "die Herren Doktoren" I guess ;)

1:06 PM

I should have said "each of us" then.

Herr is Russian for dick.

Anyway, what are you trying to figure out.

Why do you want to be addressed as Dick Doctor?

Rainer Verteidiger

Well, perhaps I should just tell you about the incident I had in mind when posting the question, as that is indeed more specific because it involves me (undergrad student) and a 60-something lady with a PHD title.

@RegDwigнt Herr is Russian for merkin.

@RainerVerteidiger Whoa, a 60-something lady with a PhD? All bets are off in that case. Call her whatever she wants to be called.

Rainer Verteidiger

1:08 PM

Can't figure out what she wants to be called, that's the problem.

First off, she's American.

I wrote her about a book of hers that is out of print and which I hoped to be able to get a copy of if she had still one left.

Dear Hillary,

Rainer Verteidiger

My first message, I addressed her as "Mrs. Surname"

And signed "Best regards, Firstname Lastname"

Sorry, "DEAR Mrs. Surname"

The answer was a like "Dear Mr. Lastname" and "Best regards, Firstname"

Wait. She answered already? What's your question, then.

Rainer Verteidiger

That confused me, so I answered "Dear Ms. Surname" (yes, I always confuse Mrs and Ms) and signed "Best regards, Firstname", just like she did.

Now her latest answer, to which I haven't replied for weeks now because of this uncertainty, she wrote "Dear Firstname Lastname" and signed "Best regards, Firstname"

So my question is: is she trying to tell me that she wants to be addressed by her first name?

She may not be trying to tell you anything. She might not know that Rainer is a man's name.

Rainer Verteidiger

1:12 PM

Well, Reiner is a nickname. My real name's Jonathan which is pretty clear usually.

Why am I even typing. Rob's faster.

@Robusto Yes sir.

Rainer Verteidiger

lol

If you are continuing correspondence with her, why not ask her this exact question?

Yeah what's the deal with the continuing. You got the book or what.

Rainer Verteidiger

1:15 PM

Nah, last she said was that she thinks she still has one in the basement but has been unable to find it so far. And as we're in the same field she opened some other topics in the conversation, too.

In any case, there are no general rules regarding such infinitesimal punctilios in letter-writing. That is, if she's American she probably has no strong etiquette boundaries anyway.

Rainer Verteidiger

Hmm.

Unless, of course, she’s suthun.

One way to do it would be to try signing your letter with "Jonathan."

Rainer Verteidiger

suthun?

1:16 PM

Southern.

Rainer Verteidiger

Oh okay.

"She a suthun gal?"

Rainer Verteidiger

If she's southern she'd probably not even responded to me unless I'd been riding on a horse.

Just "riding a horse", not on it.

You've been reading too much Carson McCullers.

Rainer Verteidiger

1:18 PM

I don't even know who Carson McLulzors is.

Oh. Without on. Thanks!

@RainerVerteidiger Now, now, let @Reg handle the word salad jokes around here.

What is it with dem Vaterland? People alluz comin' in here mixin' up da woids.

user image

It wasn't that big. Surely you exaggerate.

And yet you had to give it to her without saying who paid for it.

Rainer Verteidiger

Why is it always such a ludicrous result when native English speakers try to make fun of German :-P

1:26 PM

What does something existential mean? For example: Existential {question, panic, dilemma, threat, risk .. } mean?

Rainer Verteidiger

Every time I watch an American TV series where someone is supposed to be a German spy or something hilarity ensues as soon as they open their mouth.

Cross-Atlantic manner-clashes.

@shingu Related to existence.

@RainerVerteidiger Usually because tits are involved.

@tchrist, but im not able to comprehend this yet: The existential question “Why am I here?”

@RainerVerteidiger That ain't what I was doing. "People alluz comin' in here mixin' up da woids" was me making fun of American colloquial English.

Rainer Verteidiger

bbcamerica.com/mind-the-gap/2014/01/14/…

1:29 PM

Does it just mean, "a question related to existence? "

@shingu Probably the question "of/about" existence.

Rainer Verteidiger

shingu: It's a question that has no practical footing in the requirements of the speaker at that moment in time. Rather, it goes to the foundations of life itself: why are ANY of use here, really? Why is the UNIVERSE here, really? The very ability of someone coming up with a question like that is existential.

I don’t know anybody who still cuts things up and switches hands.

I think that’s dead.

@RainerVerteidiger, yeah, but how should I comprehend "Existential panic"?

They fear for their very existence.

Rainer Verteidiger

1:33 PM

@shingu: Ever applied for a job and didn't get it, fearing to end up homeless? That's existential panic.

@RainerVerteidiger That’s a tank-top.

@RainerVerteidiger, ;) Thanks.. Got it..

@RainerVerteidiger In the West, pumas are mountain lions, not cougars.

And cougars are milfs.

I think it’s because out East they long ago killed off all their mountains.

1:37 PM

No. It's just that we like our mountains more genteel than you Westies.

user image

uk.businessinsider.com/…

@Cerberus Yes.

bows

bow-wows

The West is said to begin at 100 degrees west. Or at least, that’s when the water runs out.

1:40 PM

That... looks like prostate cancer.

100 degrees in more than one way.

So Shika-Go is mostly Yankee?

@RegDwigнt Yeah, if we could just get rid of the South the prognosis would be better.

@Cerberus No.

It's not Yankee at all.

But on the map it is, isn't it?

That's a label that refers to shared liberal views.

Chicago ≠ Boston

1:42 PM

> Encompassing the entire Northeast north of New York City and spreading through Michigan, Wisconsin, and Minnesota, Yankeedom values education, intellectual achievement, communal empowerment, and citizen participation in government as a shield against tyranny. Yankees are comfortable with government regulation. Woodard notes that Yankees have a "Utopian streak." The area was settled by radical Calvinists.

We wouldn’t like the word yankee where I’m from. It seems either a bit precious or else a bit insulting.

By the way, they’re talking about the region populated by speakers of the Inland North dialect.

They seem to have charted out dialect zones as much as they have political ones.

Mr. Shiny and New 安宇

@Cerberus What's with those colours spilling into Canada?

@Robusto I am only talking about the map, whether that is where they have placed Chicago.

Because I'm not 100% sure where it is exactly.

Chicago lies at the bottom of Lake Michigan.

@Mr.ShinyandNew安宇 Apparently, Canada shares many of the same cultural traits?

@tchrist The one that looks like a dong, yes?

With a thin dark-blue rim?

@Cerberus Bottom left corner of Lake Michigan.

1:47 PM

@Cerberus If it pleases you to think of it that way.

Oops, jinx.

I don't know yet.

The Arizona corner.

And is the "Yankee" part all of the city, or does it have suburbs sprawling out into light-blue territory?

@Cerberus definitely the latter.

1:49 PM

OK.

But stop using the word "Yankee" . . . it's too tainted with New England stereotypes to describe Chicagoans.

And the cultural portion that intersects with New England is Irish Catholic, which is decidedly not Yankee at all.

Hey, I never said I liked their silly names.

Mr. Shiny and New 安宇

@Cerberus I am suspicious of such a map that gives county-level resolution to the US states and then ignores the fact that Toronto and area is culturally quite distinct from the rest of Ontario, and instead just spills blue ink all over it.

And their rather general character traits.

@Mr.ShinyandNew安宇 Yes, I would have expected Toronto and Ottawa to be different from a random remote village...

Perhaps Canada was added at the last moment.

@Mr.ShinyandNew安宇 Go west, Yonge man, go west.

@Cerberus Wow, you trying to pick a fight with @Mr.ShinyandNew安宇 or something?

Callin' Canada an afterthought . . .

1:53 PM

@Cerberus Ottawa’s ok. Toronto’s Eastern.

Mr. Shiny and New 安宇

@Robusto I do live west of Yonge, actually.

@Robusto I'm sure he will agree...

@tchrist Oh, dear. How very exotic.

Like India.

Let's not say things we can't take back.

@Cerberus I think they killed off the Toronto Indians some while back.

Mr. Shiny and New 安宇

> Made up of Native Americans, the First Nation's members enjoy tribal sovereignty in the US. Woodard says the territory of the First Nations is huge, but its population is under 300,000, most of whose people live in the northern reaches of Canada.

I'm not sure the author of the article knows that Canada is not actually part of the US.

1:56 PM

Toronto Indians

The Toronto Indians were a football team from Toronto, Ontario and a member of the Ontario Rugby Football Union, a league that preceded the Canadian Football League. After the Toronto Balmy Beach Beachers moved to the Interprovincial Rugby Football Union in 1941, the Indians began play in the ORFU to fill the void. Ironically, these two teams would merge in 1948 and would continue to be known as the Beachers after that season. == History == The Indians were respectable in their first season of senior competition as the team finished in 2nd place in the ORFU with a .500 record while the league had...

Mr. Shiny and New 安宇

Y'all tried that in 1812 and it didn't work out so well.

@Mr.ShinyandNew安宇 That's OK, neither does Sara Palin.

@Mr.ShinyandNew安宇 Unclear on all that jazz.

Dammit, I did all the fun work already. Now I'm bored again.

It sucks being so good at my job.

Solution: be worse.

For best results, at someone else's job.

2:02 PM

@RegDwigнt Too old for that. Old habits and all.

Spice it up with old spice.

NO U

Comparison of European road signs

Despite an apparent uniformity and standardisation, European traffic signs present relevant differences between countries. However most European countries refer to the 1968 Vienna Convention on Road Signs and Signals — adopted in Europe by Albania, Austria, Belarus, Belgium, Bosnia and Herzegovina, Bulgaria, Croatia, Czech Republic, Denmark, Estonia, Finland, France, Germany, Greece, Hungary, Italy, Latvia, Lithuania, Luxembourg, Macedonia, Montenegro, the Netherlands, Norway, Poland, Portugal, Romania, Russia, San Marino, Serbia, Slovakia, Slovenia, Sweden, Switzerland, Turkey and Ukraine. The...

Jeezis.

Human lives were spent on this.

People died making the signs comparison?

How tragic.

Well, at least nobody has opposing red and green arrows.

2:12 PM

In America we kill people with guns, not road sign comparisons. Stupid Europe.

The word is peaceful. Repeat after me.

"So I went into this bar, and this dude was all up in my grill, and so I whipped out a road sign comparison and sent him to the Promised Land."

We've killed more people with guns than you could even dream of. That's why your country is still full of idiots.

Whoa, didn't take long to get touchy about this, didja?

How do you kill people with guns? Don’t they shoot back?

2:14 PM

@Robusto um, what?

@tchrist Whip out a road sign comparison. Haven't you been reading?

Road kill.

American signs are much more international: they’re in English.

How is my bragging about more people "touchy"?

@RegDwigнt Trading on past glory, huh?

I don't think you know what English means.

2:15 PM

By know means is that true.

¿Cómo?

@Robusto our past glory got shipped to your country. Where it invented scientology and creationism. We only invented Hitler. Who killed all scientologists for not being German enough.

Our system works.

You’re Australian now?

You're Australian not now?

How does it work out for you?

Hello

2:17 PM

In the oysters’ kingdom, priapism is king.

@RegDwigнt I think an interest in transportation is linked to Asperger's.

Yeah, no purging ass in this chat.

Are these two sentences legitimate?

Sure.

No two sentences are legitimate.

2:24 PM

It's just that the country is gripped by a temporary bout of nationalistic fervency.
It's just that the country is caught up in a short-lived state of agitation.

Do these make sense and grammatically ok?

Every sentence makes some sense. The question is, does it make the sense you want it to make.

@RegDwigнt Whoa, jump back. You ain't even German, for one thing. For another, I'm just joking with you. And I was making fun of America when you got all blood and veins in your teeth and shit.

Sadly, you have not specified what it is you expect the sentences to do.

@Robusto huh what.

I have no idea what you're even talking about.

You're taking this way too personal.

The situation is the exact opposite from my perspective.

2:26 PM

Do I have to explain it to you?

Whoa, jump back. You ain't even German, for one thing. For another, I'm just joking, and not even with you. And I was making fun of Europe when you got all blood and veins in your teeth and shit.

Why are you being so aloof?

@RegDwigнt I'm German as fuckin' Tevya.

NO U

@user4215 now that sentence is not okay.

You accidentally the whole.

@user4215 I'm sorry, you did not specify you were into making out on first date.

There's some strange virus in the chat right now. People can't read what I write. Not sure if Rob got it from user, or the other way round.

Perhaps I should switch to Katakana.

グリゴーリィ・イフィーマヴィチュ・ラスプーチン

@user4215 I would say a bout is by definition temporary, so I would drop temporary.

And I would say nationalist fervor.

2:40 PM

@RegDwigнt It's not helping.

Well tough luck, I don't speak Ancient Egyptian.

@Cerberus but why? Only nationalist fervency means "nationalist fervency". Nationalist fervor means something else.

2:58 PM

@RegDwigнt You mean something else.

in The Frying Pan, 49 mins ago, by ElendilTheTall

it wasn't patronising anyway. it was condescending. (condescending means when you talk down to someone)

I think this statement is worthy of our room.

PP: I will swing by soon. [9:42]
Me: OK [9:43]
...
Me: Are you coming by? [10:56]
PP: Still at home, Rob. Will be reaching office soon. [10:57]

Oh.

So I guess we need to redefine soon.

Tomorrow?

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